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Old 02-12-2018, 11:22 AM
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Re: need help, guidance for my girl Kali

Like so many people on these forums, I too struggle with depression. I've got a feeling I was on the same medication as your wife is. I had that same lack of emotion problem. For a while, it seemed like the only emotion I could have was when I lost my temper and got angry, but every other feeling felt like there was a wet blanket on it. I talked to my doctor (and my sister who had the same issue) and I'm on a different regimen that is MUCH better for me. That would surely help you wife too, I expect.

As others have said, I think it could be a worse thing for your marriage in the long term if you give Kali up. Either you would resent your wife and suffer guilt and grief, and your wife may even feel guilt for making you do it. Guilt is a terrible poison for a marriage.

On the other hand, overcoming troubles together can bring a marriage together closer and stronger than ever. It boggles me that your wife doesn't see the comparison between you giving up Kali and her giving up her cats. I think most of us on this forum would go so far as to say that a cat would be LESS of a sacrifice to give up. Think about it, a cat's life is less then 1/4 that of an African Grey. Your Kali speaks, thinks, feels, and is bonded to you in a way I have RARELY seen in a cat, or even a dog. Giving up a companion parrot is more like giving up a child in my opinion, then it is like giving up a dog or cat. Many of us here who do not and will not ever have children would certainly agree with that.

Please try to express to your wife your love for Kali and maybe the two of you can find other ways for her to live more happily with Kali around.

Whatever happens, I wish you all the best. Good luck!
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