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Old 11-26-2019, 10:20 AM
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was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

My female Alexandrian that i purchased at the age of 4 months parted ways with me today at the age almost close to 1 year, giving her away wasn't some thing i wanted to do but some thing that needed to be done for the sake of peaceful environment , me , my family who dearly loved our Alexandrian, were honestly getting sick of her constant screaming and screeching, and specially our neighbors, i took good care of her gave her treats, kept her cage clean, tried ignoring her screams and tried other tricks that i learned on youtube to make your parrot peaceful, spent almost 2 hours everyday with her trying to socialize her, taught so many great words and phrases, and yet that wasn't enough her screaming kept getting worst to the point of us getting headaches, i tried every thing to make her stop, i prayed, but nothing worked, we tried covering her up but she was smart and she figured it out that it was move to make her stop screaming and she started screaming again under the covers.

I have a heavy heart and tears in my eyes, i feel awful, but i guess there was nothing else i could have done
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Old 11-26-2019, 10:57 AM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

One could investigate and likely provide methods that 'may' have lead to another ending. At this point, that really doesn't matter as a choice had been made and with luck the Parrot will find a home that will also find a solution to your Parrot's contact calls.

Parrots are noise, it is a reality that one must accept upfront. It is likely that Parrots are just not a good fit for your home.
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Old 11-26-2019, 12:44 PM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

It's good to share stories like this. It's a warning to people who think parrots are easy. It's better to re-home than shove the Parrot off to a spare room or the horror of a garage.

" I have a heavy heart and tears in my eyes, i feel awful, but i guess there was nothing else i could have done". You could have come here first and discussed your problems with noise.
We could have offered you advice and tips....
I can say two hours a day is not enough time for one. Parrots need to be fully Incorporated into your daily life. These creatures have highly complex social lives, they are never going to be happy spending hour after hour alone in their cage.

A lot of species are very vocal, as my quakers are. They are loud ( not screaming) for hours during the day. And are one if the most re-homed parrots for that reason. I've had a few problems with screaming too, but modifications have stopped that in my situation. But there are times when I have to endure s lot of happy volume and chatter. It's why I don't think Quakers are a good fit for a lot of people.

Regardless it takes an honest poster coming forward and sharing their inability to deal with noise. Sharing the negative aspects of having parrots in their lives, to help prevent this cycle from repeating .
I thank you for your post. Hopefully you found the right home that can find a more enriching and less frustrating life for your parrot. It's worth saying again it's much better to find a new home for a parrot, than to neglect it. As there are a horrific number of parrots shoved off on porches , stuck in backrooms, in basement, in garages , not getting the life they deserve and slowly slipping into madness!!!!!

The worst rescue I ever worked with was in a closet in a spare bedroom, kept in spite during a divorce. It was starved to a skeleton, self mutilating and close to death when finally given up.

So I urge everyone who knows they are neglecting their parrots needs. Even if it's not that severe, like you just leave it in the cage all day with food and water, some toys.... Thinking no one could put up with your parrot like you do. We can and we will! Give it a chance to find a better place to live, with a person who understands parrot behavior!!!! I know their is at least one lurker out there that has or knows of a parrot in this situation. Don't try and sell it to make some cash, give it to person who can provide the right home.
People like me and many others aren't trying to get more parrots, we are making a sacrifice to take them in and make it work to help them because it breaks are hearts. And we have to put in a lot of hours and months or years to turn them around. So find a person like that and explain and be honest and give your bird up! Please
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Last edited by Laurasea; 11-26-2019 at 12:55 PM.
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Old 11-27-2019, 01:44 PM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

I got her back today ����
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Old 11-27-2019, 01:58 PM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

Ok, what are your plans? Do you need tips on behavior, or help finding a good home?
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Old 11-28-2019, 12:18 AM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

Quote: Originally Posted by Laurasea View Post
Ok, what are your plans? Do you need tips on behavior, or help finding a good home?
I've decided to keep her, she is great bird and she is quite attached to me, giving her away in the first place wasn't the best thing for her or me, it made me guilty and sad, i couldn't sleep for nights, i felt terrible.

i ran back to the pet store from where i initially got her at the age of 4 months, hoping and praying that she would still be there, and there she was again she saw me and started moving with joy and looked like she had been waiting for me,

even the pet store guy said, she looked really worried and annoyed,

now that she is back her behavior seems oddly different, she hasn't spoken since yesterday, she has great vocal abilities, seems angry.

id like to share a video of her though but i dont know how

there is no way im putting this bird through this kind of hassle ever again.

ill keep her for life.
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Old 11-28-2019, 04:47 AM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

So please please get the help you need from the great people here. They will give you the tools to get the best parrot life for both of you. So glad you have her back safe and sound. Perhaps you should both go in for a training programme.
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Old 11-28-2019, 05:04 AM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

I'm glad you've realised how deeply attached your bird is to you.

Can you imagine how she felt when you abandoned her in a petshop? Suddenly, whatever security she had was totally gone and she was put in a shop with heaven knows what other animals, noise and bustle. People would have been passing by her cage and looking or poking at her, maybe banging against it. She would have been terrified!

Now, you've brought her home again, only she doesn't know for how long. She doesn't know what will happen next. She doesn't know whether tomorrow will dawn as usual or whether she'll be shunted away again. She's afraid and will be for a while since her security was so damaged. You'll need to work hard to gain her trust back again, I think.

All you can do is to spend time with her every day. Be gentle and kind and don't allow any loud noises or sudden changes to upset her.

All parrots scream, just as all dogs bark and all ducks quack. At least the Alexandrine call is not so loud. You should hear my cockatoo when she's in good voice! She puts the Alexes to shame! My Beaks call for about half an hour every morning and for a little longer of an evening. It's part of their ritual, so I don't try to change it. I'm lucky, though, as my neighbours are far enough away not to mind the birds' noise. If it were a real problem, I'd be sure to work out the times when my birds were noisiest and have something planned to divert them during those times. For example, if your bird screams at 7am every morning, maybe you could choose that time to feed her? Or train her? Or give her something interesting to chew? Or teach her to make a different (quieter) sound like saying 'Hello'. It may not work, but it's worth a try. Punishing the bird won't stop its natural need to call. Covering the cage, shouting or squirting it with water will only terrify it and quickly lose whatever trust it has in you.

From what you said in your first post, your bird sounded like a good companion who was gradually learning to fit in with you. If you stick with her and make her your project, there's no reason to think she won't be an excellent companion to you for years to come. Why don't you check out some of our forums (eg. trick training or target training)? I've found that training my birds has given them something to think about and occupies their minds. Target training is especially good because most birds learn it very quickly and it's a very positive way of interacting: you ask something of the bird, she does it for you and earns a reward. Everybody's happy!

Do stay in touch! If you have more questions, please ask them! Most of us have had our own problems and we have a lot of experience to share.
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Old 11-28-2019, 06:32 PM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

As to her being different, she has been in a bit of shock with all the changes and stress. It can take time to recover from this, and to trust you again. It's the same when we have to board birds in vacation, they don't understand flock seperation. Only unhealthy birds are driven from the flock. Explain and apologize, some how they understand part of that they really do!

Never cover your bird as way to deal with screaming. That's terrible advice, though commonly given.

I'm going to link some articles I really like that I think you can find helpful stuff. ( Same stuff posted on a different thread , but all is the same for you too!)

Ringneck/ Alexander are especially difficult to tame. I will also link some stuff from our ringneck expert Silver Sage and her avairy page.

This one has lots of great stuff, I'm not a fan of clicker training, but it might work for you.

https://lafeber.com/pet-birds/stress...ot-companions/
This one covers lots of behaviors, including biting further down on the article

https://lafeber.com/pet-birds/bird-behavior/
S

So you think your bird hates you..
https://petcentral.chewy.com/think-y...ird-hates-you/

On my Ornithology thread page ten I have several articles dealing with fearful parrots. Ornithology: Share and discuss scientific articles on parrots!

You can go to Silver Sage Avairy yourself and check out lots of great stuff on ringnecks. I know you're isn't a ringneck but I think these will still be helpful!

http://www.silversageaviaries.com/tamingyourringneck-1

http://www.silversageaviaries.com/new-page-2


I hope you will take the time to read every single link I gave you as well as visit page 10 of ornithology thread and read the several articles I linked in fearful, misunderstood parrots. They definitely contain information that will be helpful for you. Please keep your thread active and update us on what works for you or didn't work for you, it's do important to share these stories.

And rember it's going to take time, dedication, and patience. It took me a year to turn my Quaker Penny around , and she still needs help with confidence and self choice, and recovery from being mentally shut down from abuse and neglect.
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Last edited by Laurasea; 11-28-2019 at 08:08 PM.
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Old 11-28-2019, 07:14 PM
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Re: was this the right thing to do ?? good bye

Ok just a few more things
One we support you! Come her s d vent any frustrating days with us! Celebrate the small advanced with us too !

Greeting you bird first thing in the morning when you get up is hugely important. Spend at least 30 miniuts with your bird before going to work or school, get up earlier if you have to! Start a morning ritual that you always do. Say the same thing.

Rituals and routines are very important to birds. I would try and have several routines you do every day , and also very important is the night routine. Same bed time ever day.

A freind if mine had an African grey, who became a huge screamer!!!!!! She had the bird before marriage and then kids. It was during the time her kids were 2, and 7 that this started. She consulted a behavioral expert to help her. The stress in her house hold was terrible with the screaming, and she couldn't have people over. The very first thing she was instructed to do was start a morning routine. To do this she had to get up at 4:30 in the morning!!!! She started spending an hour every morning with just her and her parrot. After all they had 20 years together before she married and had a family. He was her family too!! She shared with me that in the first two weeks she had remarkable results. I asked if this was hard for her , and she said it became a valuable time to her as well, a time of peace. A time to read , with bird with her, a time to enjoy his company. A way to start her day less frantic.

I just remembered the other thing she was told to do. As everyone comes home, they first go and stand by the cage and say hello I'm home, and talk a couple of minutes to the parrot. So that he felt he was part of the flock, abd that he mattered. Even though the kids can't get him out or hold him, they can still say hello and be respectful.

Do not underestimate how important mornings are to parrots. Parrots are often loud in mornings, they want to confirm everyone survived the night from predators. To reafirm bonds and friendship.
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Last edited by Laurasea; 11-28-2019 at 07:58 PM.
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