Frustrated please help!!!

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

Hi, I just got a 2.5 years Congo African Grey, 4 days ago!! I did a lot of research and I thought I was ready, how wrong I was!!!
in the first day she(maybe he) was so friendly and talkative, she was eating food from my hand and I was so happy. her cage is so small (in her previous home he spend most of her time outside) so I opened her cage door and she was playing on top of her cage, but I went close to give her a treat, she scared and flew to the coach, and she was so scared and shaky, I patiently get closed inch by inch and she step up, and I put her on top of her cage

, so I went again to get him inside her cage, but when she step up she moved up on my arm and suddenly she flew or fall and landed on the floor, I again went there and she step up and I was so confident that she steps up every time that I put her on top of new play stand and the top perch was so high, that she panicked and she was so scared, and whenever I tried to get close she escape to other side, she was all sleepy and tired, and she was napping on the perch. I was frustrated and tired this process took more than 4 hours!!!! so I thought she can sleep on the playstand tonight(stupid).
so I turned off the light and went to my room and left her alone. I was so worried and after 2 hours I came back and found her in kitchen so scared! I offered her a treat and she raised her foot (poor little girl) I put her in her cage and after half and hour went to bed. the day after I didn't had a courage to take her out!!! I spend a lot of time with her talking and feeding. from second day she started screaming, and she is so afraid of me, she don't make any other noise rather than screaming, and although she is scared of me , when I want to leave the house she start screaming(I just left her for half and hour), she don't step up anymore so I can't take her out, and it's getting frustrating for her and me! I bought her new bigger cage, playstand and toys(she don't have anything in her cage now) but she don't let me to put my hand in her cage! and when sun goes down and I turn on the lights she get so scared when I even stand up, I'm sitting on the floor near her and curling on the floor to go somewhere! I think she thinks I'm a predator now. last night after a lot of screaming I opened her cage door and she flew to coach again, she wasn't that scared and I gave her a lot of treat. but when it got dark and I turned on the light, she get so scared and she was escaping and didn't let me close. after 5 hours out of frustration, I called my friend, he came and in 5 min they were buddies(I went to my room), he put her in her cage and scratching her head :11::11::11: !!!!! so she is not phobic she has problem with me!
I don't now what to do, can you help me please!!!
sorry it become too long.
Thanks a lot,
Bahram

MarciaLove · Dec 31, 2012

first off never leave a bird unattended outside of cage im sure you learned that lesson. Second you shouldnt have taken her out the first day home wait a week to let her out of cage and let her come out on her own. just sit by the cage, dont be higher than her thats threatening, talking to her or reading a book out loud to the bird in a calm voice to let the bird get used to you eventually dont try to touch her and try to go in the cage as little as possible for now she had a traumatic time at your house and now thats all she knows she thinks it will be like that all the time teach her its not like that dont let her out for a WEEK maybe more it depends on how long it takes for her to get adjusted may be more like 3 weeks and just teach her not to be afraid by not approaching her at first just sit nearby talking or not talking make sure you are calm the moment you arent calm she will feel your emotions and get anxious.

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

thanks a lot, but if I don't let her out, she keep screaming!!! I open her cages door, she goes to top of her cage and flew to coach near by! but I can't get her back so it getting so frustrating! what do you suggest? open her doors cage open and let her out on her own, or let her scream ? it getting worse at nights, do you think getting a full spectrum light help? it may remember her the first night! but maybe adding full spectrum light change how she sees me and make her less scared? thanks

MarciaLove · Dec 31, 2012

hmm id still say to leave her in the cage or if she doesnt frantically fly around then maybe let her out and just not touch her just talk softly to her or let her observe you withought you talking if you rather. i have many windows like i have one whole wall of windows in my birdroom so i dont know about the lighting if that makes a difference. and for at night try covering her cage with a sheet

LoveMyParrots · Dec 31, 2012

It sounds like she doesn't trust you. I recommend you start target/touch training her. So you'll need a chopstick, a clicker and her fav treat.

First start inside her cage,you'll need to put the chopstick inside her cage, she will most likely to bite it. When she bites or touch the end of the chopstick GENTLY, click the clicker and reward. Do not reward if she bites hard or attack the stick, instead, mash some berries on the end of the chopstick and show it to her. She will try to eat the berries by gently touching the stick, click and reward. She will soon know that when she touch the stick gently, she gets a treat. Then you can start targeting her in and out of her cage. And when she is starting to trust you, target her near or up onto your hand.

Target training are a great way to bond with your parrot, and teach them to trust you. And if you have a biting parrot, or a parrot that is scared of you, it also teaches them that hand isn't scary.

But never force her to do anything she doesn't wants to, like if she won't step up when you ask by walking away from you. Leave her alone and try it again a bit later. If you force her to step up, you'll be most likely to get bitten. And it also makes the parrot feel uncomfortable and unsafe around you, which will cause them to either become bitey or scared.

If you have any more question about target training, feel free to ask me

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

we started target training today, and she completely understand and learned it, she didn't come out today, so I just tried it in her cage, and she looks happy when we doing it!! my problem is with her screaming! when I talk to her, turn on radio or TV, she respond with screaming !!! I don't know if she feel unsafe or she forgot how to talk

and make other noises!!!

one more quick question : how should I cover her cage at nights, let her sleep then do it in middle of the night? cause she get so scared every time she sees blanket or towel! I don't want to make her uncomfortable more, but I need to put blanket on her cage in order to get her good sleep !! and so far, I was unable to do so !!!

suncon97 · Dec 31, 2012

bahram said:
Hi, I just got a 2.5 years Congo African Grey, 4 days ago!! I did a lot of research and I thought I was ready, how wrong I was!!!
in the first day she(maybe he) was so friendly and talkative, she was eating food from my hand and I was so happy. her cage is so small (in her previous home he spend most of her time outside) so I opened her cage door and she was playing on top of her cage, but I went close to give her a treat, she scared and flew to the coach, and she was so scared and shaky, I patiently get closed inch by inch and she step up, and I put her on top of her cage , so I went again to get him inside her cage, but when she step up she moved up on my arm and suddenly she flew or fall and landed on the floor, I again went there and she step up and I was so confident that she steps up every time that I put her on top of new play stand and the top perch was so high, that she panicked and she was so scared, and whenever I tried to get close she escape to other side, she was all sleepy and tired, and she was napping on the perch. I was frustrated and tired this process took more than 4 hours!!!! so I thought she can sleep on the playstand tonight(stupid).
so I turned off the light and went to my room and left her alone. I was so worried and after 2 hours I came back and found her in kitchen so scared! I offered her a treat and she raised her foot (poor little girl) I put her in her cage and after half and hour went to bed. the day after I didn't had a courage to take her out!!! I spend a lot of time with her talking and feeding. from second day she started screaming, and she is so afraid of me, she don't make any other noise rather than screaming, and although she is scared of me , when I want to leave the house she start screaming(I just left her for half and hour), she don't step up anymore so I can't take her out, and it's getting frustrating for her and me! I bought her new bigger cage, playstand and toys(she don't have anything in her cage now) but she don't let me to put my hand in her cage! and when sun goes down and I turn on the lights she get so scared when I even stand up, I'm sitting on the floor near her and curling on the floor to go somewhere! I think she thinks I'm a predator now. last night after a lot of screaming I opened her cage door and she flew to coach again, she wasn't that scared and I gave her a lot of treat. but when it got dark and I turned on the light, she get so scared and she was escaping and didn't let me close. after 5 hours out of frustration, I called my friend, he came and in 5 min they were buddies(I went to my room), he put her in her cage and scratching her head :11::11::11: !!!!! so she is not phobic she has problem with me!
I don't now what to do, can you help me please!!!
sorry it become too long.
Thanks a lot,
Bahram

Okay there's a good bit to cover here. First of all congrats on the new parrot. I want to start off by saying you are taking things way too fast. Give her a week to two weeks before you handle her. I would start by sitting in the same room talking to her and letting her get to know you. She doesn't have a problem with you she is just scared because her life has been basically turned upside down with a completely new environment. What do you mean by a "small" cage? Could we please have pictures of her cage (and her)!

Make sure she has toys to play with. Since she is so scared right now, don't add lots of toys at once. When the time comes start by laying a toy or two across the room and slowly(over a week) move it closer to her to help her warm up to it. For now keep what she currently has and let her calm down. Is she fully flighted? If so, (and its fine if she is), once again allow her to cool down because if she is fully flighted and gets spooked she could hurt herself especially in a new house. Next, NEVER LEAVE A BIRD UNNATENDED. They can get into so much stuff that can be harmful. This is if your house is "bird proof" or not. You probably don't want your stuff destroyed either. Next thing is, birds scream, some a lot some a little. This scream is sounding stress related but screams are normal. I have a grey and hear them all day along with tons of other sounds that may scare you at first, but that you will grow to love. Could you tell us about her diet? What brand of food? Fresh fruit and veggies hopefully? Also what are her treats? You are on the right track but you are also taking things very quickly, too quickly. Your friend that she let scratch her head is not her "favorite" she is stressed and most likely confused at all that is going on right now. If you are her main care taker and talk to her like you would anyone else, then you two should develop a strong bond. Feel free to ask questions! :grey:

Edit: you posted while I was typing: Not all birds have to be covered depends on the bird. If she doesn't like it, don't do it just make sure she has darkness with little light. A small night light is OK. I can not stress this enough again and it is apparent from your previous post, you are taking it too fast. Until she settles in, leave her alone. She just might be starting to realize the differences even though it's been four days.

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

these are pictures of her and her cage, she doesn't have any toy in her cage, and as you can see her cage is way too small!!! I bought a bigger cage, and I plan to use the small one as roost cage. she used to eat only sunflower seed!!! I'm trying to change her diet to roudybush and today she took a little bit pallet ! I don't know she actually eat them or throw them somewhere!!! I give her broccoli everyday! I've gave her chicken and she loves it! and I give her a little bit frozen vegetable cooked in microwave everyday! and she eats a lot of nuts as a treat, walnut, almond, and pistachio. I don't know how much I should feed her! she loves to get food from hands, so I give her a little bit food and she eats a lot of veggie, fruit and nuts as treat! eventually if I leave the food there, she don't eat most of the time. she is scared of her new toys, so I can't give them to her yet, for keeping her busy I give her a peace of cardboard every half an hour

last night my friend covered her cage with a blanket and this morning she still was sleeping when I get up, I want to keep her covered at night and maybe top of the cage in day, so she feel more comfortable!!! any advice? I should just go for it, even if she panics?

suncon97 · Dec 31, 2012

I'm glad you are getting her a new cage. May I ask, why won't you have her sleeping in the new cage? If possible could you post a link or picture of the new cage? I'm not a very informational food person as far as pellets go. I've heard of other people using roudybush so hopefully others will chime in on that. I feed pretty bird African special. Sunflower seeds are very unhealthy. There is nothing wrong with nuts but they need to be given in moderation. Try all kinds of fruits and vegetables. There are safe food lists all over the internet. One thing to be careful with is the fruits and veggies must be organic because birds are very sensitive to pesticides. Introduce new foods to her slowly. I'm not helpful on getting a bird to eat when previously on an unhealthy diet. However, there are many users that have plenty of experience with these things. After she gets settled in for at LEAST a week, I would suggest a vet visit with an avian vet. It's worth it because birds are masters at hiding illness. I have no part of the cage covered during the day.

MarciaLove · Dec 31, 2012

bahram said:
we started target training today, and she completely understand and learned it, she didn't come out today, so I just tried it in her cage, and she looks happy when we doing it!! my problem is with her screaming! when I talk to her, turn on radio or TV, she respond with screaming !!! I don't know if she feel unsafe or she forgot how to talk and make other noises!!!

one more quick question : how should I cover her cage at nights, let her sleep then do it in middle of the night? cause she get so scared every time she sees blanket or towel! I don't want to make her uncomfortable more, but I need to put blanket on her cage in order to get her good sleep !! and so far, I was unable to do so !!!

i cover my birds when i go to bed if shes afraid of blankets i would try starting just covering half her cage and see how she feels then later going to cover the whole cage and the first 2 weeks i had my Blue crown Conure he wouldnt ever stop screaming but eventually he stopped and now he hardly does at all it just takes time shes in a new place probably screaming out of fear and trying to call to the people/birds shes used to having around.

MarciaLove · Dec 31, 2012

bahram said:
these are pictures of her and her cage, she doesn't have any toy in her cage, and as you can see her cage is way too small!!! I bought a bigger cage, and I plan to use the small one as roost cage. she used to eat only sunflower seed!!! I'm trying to change her diet to roudybush and today she took a little bit pallet ! I don't know she actually eat them or throw them somewhere!!! I give her broccoli everyday! I've gave her chicken and she loves it! and I give her a little bit frozen vegetable cooked in microwave everyday! and she eats a lot of nuts as a treat, walnut, almond, and pistachio. I don't know how much I should feed her! she loves to get food from hands, so I give her a little bit food and she eats a lot of veggie, fruit and nuts as treat! eventually if I leave the food there, she don't eat most of the time. she is scared of her new toys, so I can't give them to her yet, for keeping her busy I give her a peace of cardboard every half an hour
last night my friend covered her cage with a blanket and this morning she still was sleeping when I get up, I want to keep her covered at night and maybe top of the cage in day, so she feel more comfortable!!! any advice? I should just go for it, even if she panics?

i dont keep any part of my birds cage covered during the day as i like them to get lots of light and be able to see the surroundings better. I wouldnt recommend giving chicken as its not natural for them to eat you could try mealworms if you want her to have meat cause mealworms and crickets are naturally in their diet but chicken is far from in their natural diet and isnt healthy for them

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

this is her new cage, I don't know

maybe I want to use this one too, somehow

, it makes a great carry on, it's a little bit big for a carry on, but she used to it, so make it easier for vet trips. I've read that covering top of cage in day, give a sense of security to her. what kind of perch do you guys recommend? what do you think about mirror? what size it should be? what about pedi-perch ( sandy perch? what is the difference?) how many perch should I have?

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

i dont keep any part of my birds cage covered during the day as i like them to get lots of light and be able to see the surroundings better. I wouldnt recommend giving chicken as its not natural for them to eat you could try mealworms if you want her to have meat cause mealworms and crickets are naturally in their diet but chicken is far from in their natural diet and isnt healthy for them[/QUOTE]

I don't know, her vet told me to give her chicken

she really really loves it!

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

MarciaLove said:
bahram said:

we started target training today, and she completely understand and learned it, she didn't come out today, so I just tried it in her cage, and she looks happy when we doing it!! my problem is with her screaming! when I talk to her, turn on radio or TV, she respond with screaming !!! I don't know if she feel unsafe or she forgot how to talk and make other noises!!!

one more quick question : how should I cover her cage at nights, let her sleep then do it in middle of the night? cause she get so scared every time she sees blanket or towel! I don't want to make her uncomfortable more, but I need to put blanket on her cage in order to get her good sleep !! and so far, I was unable to do so !!!

Click to expand...

i cover my birds when i go to bed if shes afraid of blankets i would try starting just covering half her cage and see how she feels then later going to cover the whole cage and the first 2 weeks i had my Blue crown Conure he wouldnt ever stop screaming but eventually he stopped and now he hardly does at all it just takes time shes in a new place probably screaming out of fear and trying to call to the people/birds shes used to having around.

she panics when she sees blanket and I go near her cage!! I've put it above her cage and she just panicked so I didn't continue. should I do it while she is sleep? or it make it worse?

MarciaLove · Dec 31, 2012

i have some bad experience with vets do some research before you give something a vet says to give because ive had a bird die because of something a vet told me to give my bird and ill never forgive myself for not doing my on research and from research ive done chicken is bad for them and obviously not in their diet. As for the blanket situation if its really stressful dont so it its not necessary just keep the room dark at night. Great cage! NO MIRRORS! your bird will become aggressive from seeing another bird never being able to access it trust me! pedi-perch and sandy perch are pretty much the same both are great to have for beak and feet filing id put one of those in and maybe two other perches i like real wood ones one rough wood one or two smooth i what id say but you bird may seem to prefer different ones so just see what your bird likes when you put them in there. I dont do the covering in the day because a bird likes to see whats above it and around it it feels unsure if it doesnt have a good view of its surroundings. And i wouldnt put her in taht litle cage at all unless you are taking her somewhere then the littler cage is perfect for traveling but the big one should be her main home.

bahram · Dec 31, 2012

thanks, what should be mt reaction to her screaming? I should call her name(I changed it, cause I felt in her previous home she was kind of ignored) or ignore her? what should I do when I want to leave the house? how long they last? I don't want to make neighbors angry! it stops or she continue till I get back?

LoveMyParrots · Jan 1, 2013

I'm gald that she picked up the target training right away

Now with the blanket, you don't have to have one. I don't put any blanket for my parrot because my bird's cage are placed in a dark room, and my parrot too, don't seems to like the blanket, specially Ozzie my alexandrine.

It's good that you are changing her diet. I can't believe that she was on a full sunflower seed diet! Sunflower seed should only be given as a treat. Make sure that she gets plenty of veggies and fruit. Right now, you're doing the right thing. Also don't too much nuts, as it is very fatty.

It's great that you got a new cage for her, although the cage she is in is very small, I actually recommend that you keep her in there for at lease about 4 more days. Since she is already so scared, let her get use to her new home first before moving her into anther cage.

Now onto the scraming. When does she scream? Most parrot will scream in the morning and late afernoon. But if she's screaming becuase she wants you to go up to her, ignore her. If you go up to her while she's screaming, it will only train how to scream even more.
Hope this helped.

If you have anymore question, feel free to ask me.

LoveMyParrots · Jan 1, 2013

I just saw that you are thinking about sand perch. I don't recommend them. It causes abrasion on their pad (feet). I think the nature wood perches are your best choice.

bahram · Jan 1, 2013

she is more scared at nights, it starts when I turn on the light, what do you guys think? do you think full spectrum light can help?

MarciaLove · Jan 1, 2013

i agree with LoveMyParrots ignore her screaming because it will teach her to scream to get your attention and when she makes a nice noise reward that eventually she will stop for now i'm not sure anything will stop it she's in a new place.

Frustrated please help!!!

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