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Old 03-26-2017, 06:16 PM
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Re: Senegal falling out of love with my wife.

They are not kidding when its said that parrots have the understanding of a 2-3 yr old. They understand a heck of a lot more then most people give them credit for. Glad your trip went well and you were received back with open wings!
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Old 08-26-2019, 11:44 AM
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Re: Senegal falling out of love with my wife.

It has taken a lot of time, and a lot of patience, but I'm seeing results.

In a way I was trying to coach both human and bird. I got to know him better as well over the years, so you really start to get finely tuned in to their behavior, poise, eyes, sound, and predict what they'll do next.

It's also vital that you don't take it personal when it does go wrong (not always easy, I know). The bird communicates in the ways it knows, and holy Moses, they are sensitive, passionate and sometimes way too intelligent for their own good! In his mind she had abandoned him, and it took a long time to get over his grudge.

The little guy turns out to be very happy on his own. He shreds through toys, but also can be quiet for hours on end, grinding away or making other happy sounds. He does love to come out, but often during play sessions he goes back in, i.e. he doesn't see it as his prison but as his home. His vocabulary has grown still, and he loves our call & response games where we introduce variables like doing it extra loud or ... in whisper mode. He loves to play around with sounds and words, and makes up his own. It's almost jazz. If it makes us laugh, you can be sure it stays in his repertoire.

Anyway, I can't repeat or suggest any specific "steps" but over time, teaching her not to touch him unless he specifically asks for it by presenting his neck (and teaching her the difference between a genuine presentation and one where he wants to have a go ()), teaching her to always talk and not just stare or be taken aback, cutting it off when he wasn't having it, letting her give most of the treats: he has let her back into his life.

Even up to a point where he does a little trick that is specific for her (never does it with me, nor would I want to): banging his head up & down before he says "Treat!" and getting it.

It was not an instant thing, but gradual, with ups & downs. Fortunately, they always kept communication going (may have needed some egging on from me)even when he was feeling aggressive or simply turning his back on her, or starting to bite his nails, or yawning (...?). It was my job to give a running commentary and explain what I thought was happening - after all, it's my first bird, so what do I know.

How do you explain to a human that he wanted her to come home so he could turn his back on her? But that's exactly what happened. *He sometimes still does this so she has to "seduce" him...

I would say that seeing them hold a strand of spaghetti in their mouth/beak and letting him eat towards her is pretty much a sign he has adjusted to the new situation. BTW, he refuses to call it "spaghetti" and calls it "spagghi spagghi" instead. I know I know, not good for him, but he sure does love pasta. And to be clear, there are bars in between them when they do this. Keeping it safe, his mood can change too abruptly to do it otherwise.

There are many variables. In the car on a 15 hour road trip, he was friendly to all of us, including to our dog right next to him. To our surprise he loves those trips, and so do we, as he often breaks up the monotony by commenting on the scenery, or ordering the dog around. At home he'd prefer to give a good nip in the Labrador's nose (and has carefully bitten his butt). Just the different scenery/situation totally changed his behavior.
BTW, we had made a separation with a cloth between them. First thing he did was fumble around with the cloth to remove it. As soon as he could see the dog he was OK and showed not a single sign of aggression (even when the dog fell asleep with his nose against the travel cage. )

Anyway, I didn't think this thread would come back up, but it did. Thanks for reading!

Senegal falling out of love with my wife.-2018-07-09-15.27.11_small.jpg

From his holiday cage.
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Old 08-26-2019, 11:48 AM
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Re: Senegal falling out of love with my wife.

A good reason to resurrect the thread, haha! Glad a new kind peaceful accord has been established betwixt bird and wife!
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Old 05-16-2020, 07:29 AM
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Re: Senegal falling out of love with my wife.

Update: due to the CoVid-19 situation, my wife has been home every day for the last 3 months.

It was interesting to see Oscar's behavior change further. After a while she was actually permitted to pet him again, with him clearly asking for it. And a few weeks in he suddenly started calling her again with a name he hadn't used for 3 to 4 years now. Not only is it astonishing to see the change, it also shows he did not forget the name, he just refused point blank to use it!

He did not "switch back" to her, I'm still his "mate", and closer than ever. But he really did soften up on her further, which is nice to see. He loves the constant presence of the both of us, and is even more of a performance clown than he was before.

There are very few days he doesn't make us hurl with laughing at least once. He's still learning new words/phrases/noises. I watched him learn to immitate a blackbird who was just outside in a manner of ... minutes.

Anyway, it does show how sensitive they are to "attention". They don't forgive easily, but they do (or at least Oscar did) if you put in enough TIME and effort - even if it is forced by the circumstances.
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