Need Some Advice...

I’ve had two 9-month old sun conures for the past four months, but I think not much bonding has been done still! My family says that they like me the best, they hop up the stairs to my room, scream for my attention when I walk in the room, and they really like being on my shoulders most of the time. But when it comes to me wanting to pet or hold them, they get agressive.

When I try to hold or caress them I get bit each time and it’s starting to become frustrating when I just want to love them. I can’t even have a finger that’s not holding food around them or else they’ll become defensive and try to bite.

Any ideas on what I should do?

(note: when I’m not walking/standing around the house with them on me i’ll have them perched on a some wire-metal-manaquin kind of thing with apples I have in my room so they’ll still be around me.)

I still think that four months is a little on the short side to be expecting a real close bond. For a bird to enjoy being held there has to be a lot of trust. I have had my bare eye cockatoo for six months and he is now just trusting me enough to step up.

I would keep my hand in full view of the bird and speak gently to him/her before I would pet. Chose a quiet time when the bird is relaxed. And don't try forcing them to enjoy being petted.

Having 2 young parrots to manage is 2x as hard as having one, and they tend to bond primarily with each other. Cuddling and petting/scratching are individual likes or hates, some like and some hate. You have a uphill job in front of you, which may never meet those expectations. As a parrot owner, a lot of time YOU are the one who must change to meet your parrots needs and expectations, not the other way round. Read the Rickybird thread where his owner Gail always mention how she has had to adapt to her conure, over 38 years together.

Yessssssssssssssssssss... Mr. Wrench knows the Rb alright.
Your birds sound like angels to me.
My bird is pretty awful. He's a fun mimic and a real character, but...
Even after all these years, I sometimes find myself putting myself or my bird down... stuff like...
I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THIS OR THAT.
WHY CAN'T HE BE SWEET AND NICE, LIKE A PUPPY?
PEOPLE WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHY I PUT UP WITH THIS.
Stuff like that.
But the Rb is a parrot... in his particular case, one generation out of the wild.
I do all the right things, as much/well as I can, but in the end, I just LOVE my bird,
Some parrots are SO SWEET, some are NOT. I'm HAPPY and a bit JEALOUS of those successes.
I have lessened my psychological and physical wounds over the decades... not because I've changed the bird, but I have changed me. And a lot of that has involved giving up on a lot of my desires/expectations. After years of battle, I surrendered. I admit... as to why have I not (and why am I unable/unwilling) to train the Rb to do anything that he doesn't want to do?
Biting, in particular? I don't do stuff that gets me bitten. I don't scratch his head much, ever... tail is okay. I NEVER do stuff that makes him mad... I don't touch others when he's out; I rarely try to get him to step up onto my hand first. Hand-held perch first, then hand. In some ways, I swallow my disappointment at having such a little monster for a pet, but he is what he is. I ALWAYS wear my hair down when he's on my shoulder, so all he can bite is hair. Really, I don't involve hands much... he doesn't like them. He seems to think the real ME is my head, perched on a weird moveable tree with questionable appendages.
Since he's fully flighted, the ONLY way I get him into the cage is to toss a chile pepper in and he flaps in after it. So food reward is a necessity for me. Tim
Example... if I have a treat, and he sees it and wants it, I HAVE to give it too him. I simply cannot/will not NOT give him what he wants. No training there!
Consequently, I have a Tazmanian Devil on my hands. I love him. I have no complaints, really. He's HIMSELF. And I'm MYSELF. And the result... check my Signature for videos. etc., if you like.
BUT THERE'S LOTS OF GOOD TRAINING ADVICE HERE... DO READ AND LEARN AND DO YOUR BEST!
Over the years, I have been very embarassed/downhearted/sad about having a pet that was so... out of my control. But it is my choice to indulge and adore him.
Finally, I accepted that I have an amazing half-wild being who shares my life! It's magic enough for me!