I FOUND Pix dead in his cage!!

All I could do was scream NO!!NO!!NO!! Okay, I'm still shaking, I'm still hysterical. I just found him 15 minutes ago. I don't want to call Don at work to give him such upsetting news and disturb his mind thought the day. Pix was the only bird (Budgie) who was BOTH Don's and mine.

Pix (and his buddy Twigs) are approx 2(?) years old. About 8 months ago, Pix developed serious systemic problems (many organ systems) and they think probably thyroid or hormones which controlled his hunger mechanism and metabolism. He became severely obese despite same diet (Harrison's lifetime) that Twigs is on. He's had diagnostics and a diet plan from 2 avian vets. Long story short, I think his organs were so far gone that they could not heal.
It is known that Budgies, due to being very overbred, or inbred with no regard to genetics, commonly develop serious internal problems. There was nothing we could have done to prevent him developing this, despite giving the best of care.

I had dreams about someday when he's better to put him in a nice flight cage with his best friend Twigs.

I feel so awful... I wish I could have said "hi" to him one more time... I wish he could have gotten out to fly with his buddy Twigs one last time... I wish he was able to sit by Twigs and preen with him one last time... I wish he has the opportunity to enjoy one last meal before he passed...

I've read these Bereavement forum threads as we all have whenever someone has this unfortunate event. I've sympathized with the owners, as I've had birds pass before (but not for a very long time, and never FINDING them dead in the cage). BUT NOW, fresh again in front of me, I know exactly how it feels...
We've all told owners not to feel guilty, but I see how easy it is when you're vulnerable. I was going to spend time with him to fly, and weigh him yesterday but I was busy. Why didn't I go over and say hi to him an extra time or take him out yesterday or this morning just for a minute? God I wish I had. I just wish I had. My heart really hurts.

Oh no! *hugs*

It definitely sounds like you did as much as could possibly be done. There is certainly nothing for you to feel guilty about. When you think, "If only..." try to catch yourself and think, "Remember when..." It's those memories that will keep him alive forever in your heart.

I'm sorry for your loss.

I am so sorry for your loss of Pix Poor little baby having genetic problems. I know it's difficult, but sweet little Pix was loved and cared for and flying free now.

I wish I could hug you right now. No matter how many times we tell people not to feel guilty, those of us who have experienced this know the waves of guilt wash over you anyway. But let them wash away, do not let them stay. You did more for that bird than most people would have - you gave him the best life you could for as long as you could. He had a last meal, a last preen, and a last flight, you were simply spared the heartache at the time of knowing it was his last. I am so sorry you had to find him

Julie, I am so deeply sorry for your loss. I wish there were something I could do to take away the pain of your heartache, my friend, but words are inadequate to the task. Just know that you are in my prayers and that you need only reach out if you need someone to talk to about this.

And Julie? Dustbunny's advice was perfect. Substituting the "if only's" for the "remember when's" is EXACTLY what you should do. Pix's passing is tragic and heartbreaking, but it shouldn't be allowed to overshadow all of the good times shared between you. Just as he enriched your life, know that you enriched his as well.

Rest in peace, Pix.

I'm so sorry for your sad loss. Sending you love and hugs.

Sorry gryf.

SilverSage said:

he had a last meal, a last preen, and a last flight, you were simply spared the heartache at the time of knowing it was his last.

Click to expand...

Thank you everyone! I know you all understand, and your kind words, even a thanks of acknowledgment that you stopped by this thread means a lot to me right now.

This quote above does help me put it into perspective. I was spared at the time 'knowing' it was all his last. I just wish that his "last everything" was closer to his last day. I know, I will remember that that's how life is, and how it goes. After all, we can't prepare for the unexpected.

Thank you all so much.

I am so very sorry, Julie. Gah....I'm all teary eyed now. Your love for Pix shines through loud and clear. I truly wish I had more than words to offer, so that you could feel better.

HUGS to you!

A little sixth sense?? Early this morning Don called and left me a message saying "don't forget to feed Pix, I know you don't forget, but just a little reminder anyway." Pix was on a once a day avian vet managed diet. Don knows I always clean and feed daily. He never calls to remind me... Maybe he had a little 'serendipity' moment there?

Also, just early this morning as I still layed in bed (or maybe it was my last though last night), I told myself that today I am going to get the budgies out and weigh them, and let them fly in one of the rooms. I never have this specific thought. It's just something I would "do", not have 'pre thoughts about'. Weird...

Good journey little birdie!

Sorry. I know it's hard...

Nothing can prepare you when you find your beloved bird on the cage floor deceased. When I found Skittle, my red factored canary, I felt so guilty because I didn't know he was sick. I mourned for along time. It was very hard on me. Now I have Rio, my Senegal and Kiwi (my daughters bird) Parrotlet, I watch them like a hawk for any signs of distress. I love canary sounds, so I play YouTube canary song videos to my Senegal, and now she mimics canary song. So sorry for you loss.

I am so very, very sorry.

Years ago my father consoled me after the loss of a deeply loved pet by pointing out that in most cases we can expect to outlive our animal companions (although I realize parrots can be an exception to this rule) The grief we experience at their loss is the price we pay for the joy we experience in having them in our lives. The fact that we take them into our hearts is our acknowledgement that we are willing to pay that price.

May God heal your heart.

Very Very Sorry Julie, My Heart goes out to you

Only the people that LOVE feel this pain

At least we are all loving parrot people to give YOU the Same Love Back !!

XOXOXO

(((Julie)))

I'm so sorry. Fly high, little Pix.

I wish I had something stronger than words to give my condolences. Pix was loved every day. His time was short, but everything happens for a reason. At least all the issues he had are gone now, he is flying and singing with all the other fids that have crossed rainbow bridge.

Keeping you in my thoughts.

Oh no!! I am so sorry to read this Julie! Give my condolences to Don as well. RIP sweet Pix

Sorry about your little guy

I m so sorry to hear about pix sending hugs, warm thoughts and prayers your way. If you ever need to talk you can PM me. Hugs