Still having times I grieve my Sun Conure, Mango, and have fear for my new babies...

Gxg

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Peace & Quiet (Yellow-Sided Green Cheek Conures, brother and sister). They are my babies whom I love very much and they are such a blessing.
Got new parrots recently - but I still find myself grieving the one I lost ...my beloved bird, Mango.


It still is saddening for me to consider (especially after seeing how it hit my mom since he was a trip).


This is him

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My pet Sun Conure parrot (Mango as my mom named him)--who happened to actually jam/dance whenever we sang praise and worship songs...he was fiesty/had so much flavor...although he wasn't quite potty trained and thus he tended to still use the restroom on others without warning ..and we had him for a year.

Also, it was a little shocking to be taking a shower and think you're hearing things...only to pick past the curtain and see the parrot (Mango) had flown into the restroom upstairs, waiting for me. And then flew up on top of the rail/chilled.

There were many other things besides that...

But his death is still a bit traumatic for me. Having my new babies/appropriate time and a lot of healing, I'm still having times thinking of my older bird and saying "He would've been 6 yrs old now" ...

And if I watch films like Rio (As I watched it with him), it'll remind me of him.


With his passing, in October of 2012, he choked to death on a random string torn up by him on the bed he sleeps on...and having to cut him down from it/hold him, I was asked to pray for him to come back to life while a commercial was on the T.V on adopting abused animals and my sister was processing on seeing his death as being "his fault". I was REALLY frustrated that my family didn't get him a new bed to sleep in since he kept chewing the bottom out of the previous one I bought...and had I seen it in time, I would've gotten to him/saved him. The bird was one I didn't buy since my family got it without me knowing it - and as I happened to end up spending the most time with it, the bird got specifically attached to me the most.

He was very much always playing with me - and I tried to buy materials as much as I could with my limited finances. But after coming home that day and seeing the bedding having a hole in it, I knew I needed to get a new one (but lacked the funds) - and after going downstairs for 2 minutes after he was fine/chilling, I was told by my sister he choked ...ran back upstairs to see him caught on a random string and it shocked me (as I was wondering 'Why did NO ONE else in the house notice?? Did no one else hear?")


It was not a good day for my mom and I. I have since decided to NEVER again to buy those beds they sell at the stores (and sadly, they finally placed a tag YEARS later noting that Conures should not have those beds due to their chewing nature) - if you've seen this kind of bed before:


94699c674468e689313382e4fa545ed5.jpg

And had I known about things like that, I would never have bought it - thankful others pointed out the same issue that year, as seen here in The Most Dangerous Parrot Cage Accessory
November 5th, 2012 Posted By:
Patty Patty



Again, He was fine with the family got home/doing his thing and I was downstair working. Apparently, no one heard him due to my sister doing something else and dad cooking and mom upstairs. By the time it was all done, they didn't know he had passed till it was over.

I don't want to give anyone the wrong impression - for my family was very dilligent with cleaning the cage and always changing the cage bottom with buying the bird new bedding which occurred frequently - and when money is tight, things get put off (as was the case with me since I was staying with my folks but trying to find full-time employment). I had noticed when the legging seemed to come out and there was no hanging string there - and was going to buy a new bedding once the funds came in again....but didn't get the finances in time.

And for me personally since I'm very hyper-vigilent, I was already in the habit of constantly buying new beds for my parrot so that things would be fresh (as we already studied on how to take care of them and the need to always buy new material - with me knowing the most due to loving zoology and being the main one studying up on them).

Mistakes happen, nonetheless, even when the best of care is given for animals - as noted by many professional animal keepers and vets.

And when I got done burying my bud/West-Indian bird with the family, it was very depressing - and still is a lot. There Will never be another like him with that much attitude/serious loyalty to consistently come to me to chill and dancing to praise and worship music from my mom...and who knows how to talk/argue well.



And there are days I've often had dreams about my bird and seen him flying away from me - or me catching him again when he flies out the house. I felt God saying He's in Heaven whenever those dreams come up (and I do believe animals have souls). One dream I had back in November of 2012 happened after I was feeling bummed on it many times. I had a dream where I was in the house and there was another bird present there---as if my family had bought another bird...and as I was playing with it, it seemed like it was Mango and I was excited---but then I remembered that he died...and the bird did looked/acted differently. But it crossed my mind that perhaps the spirit of Mango was in the new bird--or perhaps I could raise the new bird in hopes of having someone similar to Mango. Apparently, there were other birds in the house as well and we ended up with 3 different birds..one of them that could walk on 2 legs and kept nipping my heals while the other was an African Parrot.

That year, our family has been talking on buying a new bird, so I had been considering the issue for awhile......and I've had many other dreams since.

And for my mom, although she liked the birds, she felt I had gotten them for myself since she said she had gotten over Mango/getting another bird since she didn't want to go through it again. So being mostly by myself in taking care of them, I'm very much protective of anyone else messing with them - and I did consider when I move out, as I'm the primary caretaker of those birds, I don't trust others with them.

I don't even trust leaving them at home if I go abroad or to road trips (And yes, I've considered how to take them with me on the road and I'm looking for a carrier and travel cage to do just that). So any prayer support would be appreciated
 
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Teknogeddon

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I actually heard about one of those killing a lovebird right after I purchased it. Returned it for an equal value item. Now I have a nice rock that attaches to the cage right next a water dish.

Healthier anyway. :)

I'm so gunshy about buying from petco. They don't seem to research their products. Dr. Foster for the win.
 

Terry57

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I am so sorry for your loss of Mango. It is obvious how much he meant to you, and he will always be in your heart:) I hope that someday you can remember only the good times, and that what happened will fade.
 

SailBoat

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I am so sorry for your loss of Mango. It is obvious how much he meant to you, and he will always be in your heart:) I hope that someday you can remember only the good times, and that what happened will fade.

I am very sorry for your loss and understand your grief.

We have had more than our fair share of losses over the years, but we understand that as part of what we do. What we have found over the years is that the Love Space in your Heart for your beloved Mango will never decrease. The pain of the loss will always be there. A photo or memory will bring back tears. Having said that, we have found that as Mango was opening your heart. Mango was also opening a space for a other. I can assure you that it is there and it will grow in warmth and size.

Know that you are among friends that understand.
 

Scott

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RIP Gandalf and Big Bird, you are missed.
My condolences for your loss of Mango. He was a beautiful and deeply loved companion. Your caution against those tents/huts may very well save more than one bird.
 
OP
Gxg

Gxg

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Peace & Quiet (Yellow-Sided Green Cheek Conures, brother and sister). They are my babies whom I love very much and they are such a blessing.
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My condolences for your loss of Mango. He was a beautiful and deeply loved companion. Your caution against those tents/huts may very well save more than one bird.
Appreciate the sentiments and support
 

wrench13

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We all feel your pain, as do any of us who have lost winged friends over the years. They fly into our hearts and heads, and never leave, but do make room for others, just like a real flock.
 

GracelynNBirds

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I actually heard about one of those killing a lovebird right after I purchased it. Returned it for an equal value item. Now I have a nice rock that attaches to the cage right next a water dish.

Healthier anyway. :)

I'm so gunshy about buying from petco. They don't seem to research their products. Dr. Foster for the win.

Oh man, I hate petco and petsmart!! Especially when it comes to birds. I like to get my millet, new toys, etc at my local parrot store. They treat their parrot so well, and they are so well trained. I do everything in my power not to buy ANYTHING from those stores! We do buy crickets from petsmart but other than that I beg my parents that we don't go to those stores. :mad:
 

Mariar

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I'm really sorry you are still going through a lot of pain. I still start to cry when I hear a certain song my doolie liked to sing to. It's never easy and never will be when u lose a loved one. Hang in there,,we are here to listen, and help you through the tough times. This forum is made up of a lot of wonderful and caring people who all share a similar passion...love for birds and animals.
 

chris-md

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I understand your pain, and even understand that guilty feeling.

Let me share with you a story I rarely tell anyone, and only mentioned once here. 15 years ago or so my grandmother gifted me a red throated conure. Named her Aphrodite. Sweet to me, hated everyone else.

We didn't know better and shoved her into our side computer room. Slight eyeshot from the kitchen. I didn't interact with her as much as I should have, and she developed a screaming habit. We reacted by just covering the cage.

The next year after we got her, I went to college and she remained home with my parents in their care. They never took her out because she would bite them. One week they went on vacation and left her in my brothers care. Day one bird screamed so brother covered her up and forgot about her...for a week.

She did not survive that.

It still haunts me that I did figure out a way to take her with me to college (I stayed on campus housing my whole college career), and I still feel horrible to this day about how she departed this world. I don't blame my brother, he never took care of her before, certainly didn't know what he was doing.

So you see, I truly understand your feeling of guilt, as misplaced as they are. They get easier over time. The only thing you can do is simply love the babies you have with you now. I got back in the game a year and a half ago, adopting a male eclectus. He is the model of a well cared for bird. As long as we are home, he is out of his cage. Great diet. This helps ease my conscience knowing I'm doing well by him.
 
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faeryphoebe1

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I am so sorry for your loss of Mango. They take our hearts with them, don't they?

Even years later your heart is still breaking. That means that you truly loved him.

Mango was blessed to have you. He knew love.
 

GaleriaGila

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Gxg,
I just noted this thread and read your story. You sound like such a loving and responsible person...
I'm so sorry for your troubles. :)
But I'm VERY glad you found us!
Welcome to the "flock".
 

goalerjones

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I'm just seeing this now so forgive the late reply.

Our little babies are just that, mischievous and curious. And for that reason they can get themselves into trouble in an instant. So in light of that let me say these things:

1) accidents happen. Even to the most careful and cautious of us.
2) you did not make this happen on purpose.
3) birds are magical creatures, and capture our hearts very easily. And the bond we feel runs very deep, very quickly.
4) your pain means that you really did care.
5) in the beginning of being a "parront", we learn as we go. We make mistakes ALL THE TIME. And we learn from them.
6) your heartbreaking experience can actually make you a better caretaker.
7) the decision whether or not to get another bird needs to be based on your ability to take care of it, not whether you made mistakes in the past.


Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk
 

SteelGypsy

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There are no words to say how so sorry for your loss - I feel it deeply. I lost my Lilly a week ago today because of this bed. Every minute I think, is this the time it happened? I can hardly breathe. Her foot got tangled on some strings she pulled and she panicked. The guilt I feel for failing her is overwhelming. But you have come to the right place...everyone here is so full of love and support & have such beautiful hearts. I have been taking comfort here that I can't find anywhere else.
 
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Gxg

Gxg

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Peace & Quiet (Yellow-Sided Green Cheek Conures, brother and sister). They are my babies whom I love very much and they are such a blessing.
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There are no words to say how so sorry for your loss - I feel it deeply. I lost my Lilly a week ago today because of this bed. Every minute I think, is this the time it happened? I can hardly breathe. Her foot got tangled on some strings she pulled and she panicked. The guilt I feel for failing her is overwhelming. But you have come to the right place...everyone here is so full of love and support & have such beautiful hearts. I have been taking comfort here that I can't find anywhere else.
So sorry for your loss and yet thankful for the empathy in sharing
 

wrench13

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Gxg

Gxg

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Peace & Quiet (Yellow-Sided Green Cheek Conures, brother and sister). They are my babies whom I love very much and they are such a blessing.
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