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Old 08-07-2017, 06:26 PM
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Lost my Gertie today

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Hello,
After a month-long respiratory illness, probably aspergillosis, my heart's joy of 22 years, Gertie (Jardine's), died today. See my thread in the General Health forum, "Serious Respiratory Distress."
I'm just checking in for now, in between crying jags. I can't face my dining room, where her large cage is, and which I'd kind of converted into a hospital room.
My main comfort now is knowing her suffering is over, which, over this past weekend, was terrible. I'm glad I made the decision to stay up most of the night last night in the living room recliner, holding and petting her against my chest, which calmed her a bit. She just couldn't breathe, and the sounds of her struggling were hard to hear. I can only imagine what it was like for her. Holding her at least lessened some of the fear - for both of us. This is so hard to bear. Every loss is unique. For me, at least, it does bring the beauty and love in the relationship into sharp focus. And that does help.
Thanks for reading,
Judy
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Old 08-07-2017, 06:39 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

It so really hurts! I am sorry for your baby! And your pain!
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Old 08-07-2017, 06:43 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

My deepest condolences, Judy, for your loss of Gertie. There is no way to prepare for overwhelming sadness after a long companionship, particularly following a month of convalescing. Parrots are keenly intuitive, and Gertie knew she was dearly loved. Many of us have been through similar, know there will be better days. For now, cherish the memories and be kind to yourself.

A wise friend shared this with me after a loss: "There is a sacredness in tears. They are not a mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition and of unspeakable love." Washington Irving
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Old 08-07-2017, 07:14 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

Judy I don't know if you followed your original post, but I made a donation in Gertie's name to Cornell University's vet school, and directed it to be used for parrot related studies and programs. Now Gertie will live on in at least 2 places, at Cornell and in your heart. You were a good mom right to the end, I'm sure it eased her to have you close by.
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Old 08-07-2017, 07:53 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

Thank you so much, Al, for making a donation to Cornell in Gertie's name. That is a wonderful thing to do, I am very grateful, also for your kind words. Thanks also to Scott for the Washington Irving quote, something to memorize and pass on, as you have! And thanks to everyone! I'm so glad I got back onto these forums after a long hiatus. You guys are great!
Judy
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Old 08-07-2017, 08:22 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

Judy, thank you for sharing.
I am always so enriched when older birds' owners share these most most MOST difficult and intimate times.
I will face it someday.
And you have helped me prepare and accept, and be at greater peace.
*Patagonian hugzszszzs*
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Old 08-07-2017, 08:32 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

I'm so sorry for your loss. Please take care. You were there for her when she needed you most.
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Old 08-07-2017, 09:16 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

My heart goes out to you. Gertie was so lucky to have you there to give her comfort.


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Old 08-07-2017, 09:20 PM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

Somewhere ~
somewhere in time's own space
There must be some sweet perching place
Where creeks sing on and tall trees grow
Some Paradise where all parrots go,
For by the love we feel at the end,
I know great parrots live again.

Adapted from a poem by Stanley Harrison

I am truly sorry for your loss
Take care
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Old 08-08-2017, 06:58 AM
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Re: Lost my Gertie today

I'm so very sorry for your loss. These small creatures fill such a large place in our hearts and our homes, their absence is felt as deeply. I'm glad you were with her all the way to the end, those moments are precious. Twenty two years of memories will comfort you and help you heal and they are yours forever.

Fly Free Gertie, you will be remembered.
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