Allee
Well-known member
Hey there, how are all my feathered buddies? I hope all of you are living large and in charge! We're looking forward to springtime here in Texas.
A lot of you know, I've thought of running away several times (sure I'd rather fly away, try not to judge, I'll fly when the time comes). I like to keep my options open, I hope all my Aunties, Uncles, and feathered friends out there are hearing this, safety in numbers, I like to know I have places to go. Training my mom has been challenging to say the least. Lucky me, wouldn't you know I got one of the more stubborn humans to work with.
I've had to make some serious behavioral changes. I am not allowed to scream my brains out just for the fun of it. I can't have junk food even though it's my favorite. I can't stay up to dismantle my cage after lights out. See what I mean? To be fair, Mom has made changes too, I know she loves me and wants me to be happy. I'm not sure what neurotic means but she doesn't want me to be that.
All in all, I'm a pretty happy bird but last week I was ecstatic. My dad was home on vacation. Mom kept saying 'disruptive'. I tried to learn to say 'Hallelujah,' no luck with that, so far.
Dad is great! I love my dad! I want my dad to be here all the time! I want to live with my dad in his apartment when he works! Dad brings me cool gifts, he laughs when I'm silly, he lets me scream, he plays his guitar and lets me sing and dance along. He lets me stay up late and goof off. Love, love, love my dad!
Dad let me eat at the table with the grown ups too. Mom didn't like it but, hahaha, Dad said! I got so excited, I stepped in the mashed potatoes and it felt so good, I squished it between my toes until I fell on my feathery butt. Dad thought that was too funny. I may have pitched a couple of broccoli florets off the table too, but Mom had left the room shaking her head by that time. I got to hang out with Pops while he cleaned up after dinner. The dogs were happy too, they got mashed potatoes. Dad gets me, he really does. He never forgets to tell me how pretty I am and how impressed he is when I raise my bonnet.
While it was Dad's turn to watch me, I may have been showing off a little bit, I'm a Too, that's what we do. I climbed the chain that holds up my swing when it's hanging in the window. Dad laughed and clapped and Sammy yelled, Poppy, Poppy, Poppy. I was having so much fun, then the Wicked Witch of the south walked in the room and put me AND Dad in a time out. I'm glad she stopped there instead of turning us into toads, I know she has a wand and a broom. This time Dad got in wayyy more trouble than I did.
Something like this, "Are you planning to watch her break her fool neck? That chain is dangerous, she can get her toes tangled! Do you know how far away her vet is? Seriously, you'd take a chance like that after hours? What are you thinking?" Uncomfortable pause, awwwkwarrrd! "Well-would you mind getting her down?" While I was clinging to the tiny chain, Bessie Buzzkill noticed I was in need of a nail clip and bath. The rest of the evening didn't go well at all. Mom decided she didn't trust either of us so she peeled me off my chain herself then chunked me straight under a grooming bus. Thanks again, Mom!
The next day was better, we had spaghetti to play with, I mean eat, of course I mean eat, what kind of parrot would use spaghetti to paint the table with?
And then there's little Sammy Sunshine, Momma's Boy, Teacher's Pet, Show Off, Golden Bird, enough to turn my pretty brown eyes green with jealousy. The Little Green Snot put on an award winning performance with Mom to show Dad all the new words he's learned and all the tricks Mom has taught him. I ask you, how can the rest of us compete? Don't get me wrong, I like the quakers most of the time, especially Harry, she's my new bestie, but sheesh, enough already!
I tried to show Dad all my new words, but no matter how long I rant, when the words come out of my throat they aren't really words.
Dad tried to encourage me by asking Mom to translate, "What's Poppy saying?"
Sure enough, my mom, traitor that she is, said, "Poppy is just pretending to talk because the quakers do, she only knows about twenty real words, the rest is cockatoo gibberish."
Well, thank you very much, Mommy Dearest! I expected a little support from my primary caregiver! That's loyalty for you. Dad always plays along and talks to me like he understands every single word I try to say.
I wanted Dad to know how much I love his company so every time he left my sight, I set my volume to mind-shattering and voiced my displeasure. And true to her rotten nature, the control freak with the dreaded cage cover shows up right in the middle of my tantrum. She doesn't say a word, just plops the cover on a chair and puts me on the balcony of my cage. Next phase of Operation Peace And Quiet, you ask? I'll be placed inside the cage and covered until I remember to use my inside voice. I lowered the volume considerably and yelled, EEEEEE!.....EEEEEE! EEEEEEE!......EEEEEEE! Translation, Dad, pleeeeeease hurry back! Dad was ordered to be silent and stay out of my room. I was ordered inside my cage with the doors closed! I know this game and I wasn't in the mood to be covered so I turned the volume even lower and tried, BOP......BOP BOP BOP BOP....BOP BOP.....BOP! That one worked and the cover stayed on the back of the chair instead of over me.
Lights out, that's another of my less than favorite times. I'm a busy girl so I'm usually ready for bed, sometimes if Mom's late with bedtime, I even have to yell to remind her but when Pops is in the house, all bets are off, who wouldn't want to stay up late? While Dad was home, Mom gave us an extra half hour every night before bed. I should have been pleased but by bedtime I was too wound up for my swing and Nite Nites.
Sure enough, Sammy puts on his version of The Tonight Show! At the first glimpse of a cage cover, he starts in with, Good Nite Nite! Gimme, Gimme A Kiss! Mmmwahhh! Mphwa, mphwa! Give me kissses! Disgusting if you ask me, but humans love it. How does a beak even make a smoochie noise? Sammy must have had a beak upgrade, is there a free app for that? He goes on and on, Peek A Boo, I Love You! Are you okay? Pretty Bird! Thank You! Harry joins in with her kitty imitations and other animal noises so it sounds like a zoo. Sweet Pea, Piper and Twinkle get loud at bedtime too but they can't talk even as well as I can. While the morons perform their nightly routine, I splash the water out of my bowl, empty my dry food dish, hang upside down, that's a bit tougher after a nail clip, throw paper on the floor, poop beside the paper on the bare floor and entertain Dad with my good night song that I made up myself. He loves my song no matter how many times he hears it.
After that, Mom pushes my cage back to my own room and covers me, she always tells me good night and sometimes she sings to me. We blow kisses to each other and make our own goofy noises, not a bad way to end the day if I could only leave it at that. Nope, I usually can't, so I climb down below the cover and put my claw through the bars grasping desperately at thin air outside my cage where I'd rather be, then I bellow, POP-EYE, (that's my old name, I like my new one better) POP-EYE, is more dramatic plus it fits the occasion better, if I'm really loud, humans look like their eyes are about to POP-OUT of their sockets and dogs head for safe zones. Mom lets me go on with my charades for a few minutes. More often than not the last thing I hear before dreaming parrot dreams is Mom's angry voice saying, "Poppy, get your fluffy white ass in your swing and close your beak and your eyes! Hurry up, Poppy, don't make me come in there!
Well, sweet dreams to you too, Lady! You'll be sorry when parrot court gives Dad full custody.
A lot of you know, I've thought of running away several times (sure I'd rather fly away, try not to judge, I'll fly when the time comes). I like to keep my options open, I hope all my Aunties, Uncles, and feathered friends out there are hearing this, safety in numbers, I like to know I have places to go. Training my mom has been challenging to say the least. Lucky me, wouldn't you know I got one of the more stubborn humans to work with.
I've had to make some serious behavioral changes. I am not allowed to scream my brains out just for the fun of it. I can't have junk food even though it's my favorite. I can't stay up to dismantle my cage after lights out. See what I mean? To be fair, Mom has made changes too, I know she loves me and wants me to be happy. I'm not sure what neurotic means but she doesn't want me to be that.
All in all, I'm a pretty happy bird but last week I was ecstatic. My dad was home on vacation. Mom kept saying 'disruptive'. I tried to learn to say 'Hallelujah,' no luck with that, so far.
Dad is great! I love my dad! I want my dad to be here all the time! I want to live with my dad in his apartment when he works! Dad brings me cool gifts, he laughs when I'm silly, he lets me scream, he plays his guitar and lets me sing and dance along. He lets me stay up late and goof off. Love, love, love my dad!
Dad let me eat at the table with the grown ups too. Mom didn't like it but, hahaha, Dad said! I got so excited, I stepped in the mashed potatoes and it felt so good, I squished it between my toes until I fell on my feathery butt. Dad thought that was too funny. I may have pitched a couple of broccoli florets off the table too, but Mom had left the room shaking her head by that time. I got to hang out with Pops while he cleaned up after dinner. The dogs were happy too, they got mashed potatoes. Dad gets me, he really does. He never forgets to tell me how pretty I am and how impressed he is when I raise my bonnet.
While it was Dad's turn to watch me, I may have been showing off a little bit, I'm a Too, that's what we do. I climbed the chain that holds up my swing when it's hanging in the window. Dad laughed and clapped and Sammy yelled, Poppy, Poppy, Poppy. I was having so much fun, then the Wicked Witch of the south walked in the room and put me AND Dad in a time out. I'm glad she stopped there instead of turning us into toads, I know she has a wand and a broom. This time Dad got in wayyy more trouble than I did.
Something like this, "Are you planning to watch her break her fool neck? That chain is dangerous, she can get her toes tangled! Do you know how far away her vet is? Seriously, you'd take a chance like that after hours? What are you thinking?" Uncomfortable pause, awwwkwarrrd! "Well-would you mind getting her down?" While I was clinging to the tiny chain, Bessie Buzzkill noticed I was in need of a nail clip and bath. The rest of the evening didn't go well at all. Mom decided she didn't trust either of us so she peeled me off my chain herself then chunked me straight under a grooming bus. Thanks again, Mom!
The next day was better, we had spaghetti to play with, I mean eat, of course I mean eat, what kind of parrot would use spaghetti to paint the table with?
And then there's little Sammy Sunshine, Momma's Boy, Teacher's Pet, Show Off, Golden Bird, enough to turn my pretty brown eyes green with jealousy. The Little Green Snot put on an award winning performance with Mom to show Dad all the new words he's learned and all the tricks Mom has taught him. I ask you, how can the rest of us compete? Don't get me wrong, I like the quakers most of the time, especially Harry, she's my new bestie, but sheesh, enough already!
I tried to show Dad all my new words, but no matter how long I rant, when the words come out of my throat they aren't really words.
Dad tried to encourage me by asking Mom to translate, "What's Poppy saying?"
Sure enough, my mom, traitor that she is, said, "Poppy is just pretending to talk because the quakers do, she only knows about twenty real words, the rest is cockatoo gibberish."
Well, thank you very much, Mommy Dearest! I expected a little support from my primary caregiver! That's loyalty for you. Dad always plays along and talks to me like he understands every single word I try to say.
I wanted Dad to know how much I love his company so every time he left my sight, I set my volume to mind-shattering and voiced my displeasure. And true to her rotten nature, the control freak with the dreaded cage cover shows up right in the middle of my tantrum. She doesn't say a word, just plops the cover on a chair and puts me on the balcony of my cage. Next phase of Operation Peace And Quiet, you ask? I'll be placed inside the cage and covered until I remember to use my inside voice. I lowered the volume considerably and yelled, EEEEEE!.....EEEEEE! EEEEEEE!......EEEEEEE! Translation, Dad, pleeeeeease hurry back! Dad was ordered to be silent and stay out of my room. I was ordered inside my cage with the doors closed! I know this game and I wasn't in the mood to be covered so I turned the volume even lower and tried, BOP......BOP BOP BOP BOP....BOP BOP.....BOP! That one worked and the cover stayed on the back of the chair instead of over me.
Lights out, that's another of my less than favorite times. I'm a busy girl so I'm usually ready for bed, sometimes if Mom's late with bedtime, I even have to yell to remind her but when Pops is in the house, all bets are off, who wouldn't want to stay up late? While Dad was home, Mom gave us an extra half hour every night before bed. I should have been pleased but by bedtime I was too wound up for my swing and Nite Nites.
Sure enough, Sammy puts on his version of The Tonight Show! At the first glimpse of a cage cover, he starts in with, Good Nite Nite! Gimme, Gimme A Kiss! Mmmwahhh! Mphwa, mphwa! Give me kissses! Disgusting if you ask me, but humans love it. How does a beak even make a smoochie noise? Sammy must have had a beak upgrade, is there a free app for that? He goes on and on, Peek A Boo, I Love You! Are you okay? Pretty Bird! Thank You! Harry joins in with her kitty imitations and other animal noises so it sounds like a zoo. Sweet Pea, Piper and Twinkle get loud at bedtime too but they can't talk even as well as I can. While the morons perform their nightly routine, I splash the water out of my bowl, empty my dry food dish, hang upside down, that's a bit tougher after a nail clip, throw paper on the floor, poop beside the paper on the bare floor and entertain Dad with my good night song that I made up myself. He loves my song no matter how many times he hears it.
After that, Mom pushes my cage back to my own room and covers me, she always tells me good night and sometimes she sings to me. We blow kisses to each other and make our own goofy noises, not a bad way to end the day if I could only leave it at that. Nope, I usually can't, so I climb down below the cover and put my claw through the bars grasping desperately at thin air outside my cage where I'd rather be, then I bellow, POP-EYE, (that's my old name, I like my new one better) POP-EYE, is more dramatic plus it fits the occasion better, if I'm really loud, humans look like their eyes are about to POP-OUT of their sockets and dogs head for safe zones. Mom lets me go on with my charades for a few minutes. More often than not the last thing I hear before dreaming parrot dreams is Mom's angry voice saying, "Poppy, get your fluffy white ass in your swing and close your beak and your eyes! Hurry up, Poppy, don't make me come in there!
Well, sweet dreams to you too, Lady! You'll be sorry when parrot court gives Dad full custody.
and adorable!! Poppy is such a good writer! 
