Trip to the vet yesterday was fantastic!!

I seriously underestimated my little genius Lily and was shocked by her manipulative brilliance but also pleased to find a solution so quickly..... we get to the vet and she seems calm, enjoying chatting with some other birds & her new veterinarian comes in (who I absolutely love). At first he wraps her up in a towel and checks her health and notices the band on her ankle.... he said it was over 30 years old meaning my 10 year old too is way into her 30s! The band she was wearing was so old he said they discontinued them in the 80s!! Doesn't bother me in the least that she's older but made me realize some things.... She's been around the block and has probably been rehomed a bunch of times. He told me that in the wild, toos do tend to move from flock to flock so rehoming is a normal part of life to these birds (I did not know that). So realizing that she's so smart he told me why she was having behavior issues at home (charging at my boyfriend with feathers flushed trying to nip at him when he enters the room and sometimes even nipping at me).... she was trying to be the boss of the house!! And it worked!! Up until yesterday that is. I changed my fearful attitude into one of dominance and she is now obedient, doesn't bite and will let anyone pet her and hold her (even my boyfriend). Thank GOD for our vet! She almost had us fooled!!! Good thing we picked up on it fast!!! Anyone having behavioral problems with their bird you gotta try this!! Even when she's charging we are going to start to charge back, and by charge I mean walk towards her, no more showing signs of fear.... she has been alittle angel since she got home but if she does try to put anything I'm going to put her in time out, I think I'll try the bathtub.... one last sad thing that I discovered is that Lily was abused [emoji30].... he said that he could tell because she flinched when he would hold up a pen or certain objects and just her different reactions to things he was doing... I wish I knew more of her background so I could understand her better but that's all I have for today guys!!



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So glad the vet trip went well. You now know much more about Lily by virtue of the band, what will remain hidden is the "baggage" accumulated by rehoming. Cockatoos are very keen observers of everything, particularly emotion. Bear in mind your tactic of boldness may or may not sustain the relationship! Lily is still in the honeymoon phase and may well change tactics, ie. adapt.

Time-outs for bad behavior are effective if short. I generally return them to their cage and shut the door for just a few minutes. While it is not desirable to "criminalize" the cage, a short duration followed by freedom allows them to understand the association.

Great news and echo Scott's comments.

'too's are clever and manipulative as you have found out, this ultimately doesn't lead to a happy bird so all good you are on top thanks to your informative AV. Wow, into her 30's, thank goodness this lady has found a lovely home with you.

How long does the honeymoon phase last?? Yes I am aware of the baggage, I know what you mean by balancing out the boldness❤️ I know this is all going to take a long time to learn I'm just happy she isn't boring or attacking anyone anymore


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I haven't had to do any time outs yet but I was planning on doing some short time covered in the cage, maybe 5 minutes or so


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Halleluyah, and congratulations all around!

emyoung858 said:

How long does the honeymoon phase last?? Yes I am aware of the baggage, I know what you mean by balancing out the boldness❤️ I know this is all going to take a long time to learn I'm just happy she isn't biting or attacking anyone anymore


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Click to expand...

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The "honeymoon" phase is hard to define, but can last weeks if not months. Much depends on how quickly Lily feels comfortable her current situation is stable. You'll never know how many times she has been rehomed; some situations may have lasted a week or so and others several years. Hard to really get into the head of a parrot, but they are so observant. At some point she will likely have a sense of permanence.

As with the raising of children, consistency and routine are important. You can start by creating a daily routine that is as constant as possible.

Scott said:

The "honeymoon" phase is hard to define, but can last weeks if not months. Much depends on how quickly Lily feels comfortable her current situation is stable. You'll never know how many times she has been rehomed; some situations may have lasted a week or so and others several years. Hard to really get into the head of a parrot, but they are so observant. At some point she will likely have a sense of permanence.

As with the raising of children, consistency and routine are important. You can start by creating a daily routine that is as constant as possible.

Click to expand...

The consistency part is tough because my schedule is different every day but my weeks are the same, is that what u mean??


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They learn schedules and get to know routines. You can always talk to Lily and tell her what is happening, she will pick up on things you do just before you go out. Plum hears us retrieve shoes from the cupboard and shouts 'see you later', see what I mean? They listen intently.

We wondered how Plum knew it was time for bed, he cannot read the clock (can he lol) but always asks at about the same time each evening. Well we ate at a different time recently, a lot earlier, as were going to a concert that evening and voila Plum asked for bedtime earlier (really useful!) so he gauges it after we have eaten our meal.

Consistency will help you with the 'honeymoon' phase, if you are consistent in your behaviour/approach to her it will give Lily a sense of reassurance as she will know the boundaries and limitations. Normal routine will become reassuring to her, so be aware of any changes in the short term until she realises she has a 'home for life'.

Just a return to the cage is enough for a time out, I only cover Plum if he has been very naughty to emphasize the point but it is only brief. In time maybe just a verbal warning?

Remember to be calm in returning her for a time out though as the opposite, a drama can 'pump' your 'too into a possible bite. Keep your voice flat as high energy from you will be perceived as a reward.

Thanks so much for the advice, I had to do a time out yesterday because she charged at my boyfriend yesterday, I did it for a couple minutes and covered the cage. My biggest issue is her issue with him, I don't know what it is about him that she just seems to hate, maybe she reminds him of someone who abused her, I suppose. Her AV told us she is well into her 30s and 40s and could see signs of abuse by the way she would flinch to certain things, poor girl... i just don't want her to keep on attacking him and it's really hard because now he's scared to be in the same room as her, I know he needs to not be so afraid but I think he wants to purchase some bite proof gloves first, lol.

I do have a sense that she is becoming accustomed to routine and is getting situated so much quicker then what I had anticipated. She doesn't screech when I leave the house anymore and I say bye bye, give her a kiss and head out the door. I guess she is realizing that I will be coming back. My worry about routine is that my daily routine varies.... Friday and Saturday I have off and I spend all day with her and she just sits in my knee as happy as can be, Sunday I work for 5 hours, and on Tuesday and Thursday I work 9-5 and have class from 6-8, I hope this inconsistent schedule won't affect her too much because it is out of my control but each day seems to get alittle better as she settles in.

I've also noticed that she has been trained to stay on her perch when no one is home, she absolutely hates being caged in except at bed time and I absolutely hate having to do it so I am going to try to see if I can keep her in her perch while I am gone, any thoughts?? I have been testing her by leaving her alone for longer and longer amounts of time to see if she'll stay on her perch and she always does. I am also considering getting a wireless baby monitor because I work 5 minutes from home in case she were to decide to get off her perch, I've basically baby proofed the room for when I am gone. Everyone is saying it's a bad idea, what are your thoughts?


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Personally I wouldn't, but I would stuff as much in her cage in the way of activities as I could. Please read Allee's posts about Poppy as she is a fab mom and has shown some great pics of Poppy's cage. Think climbing boings, a swing, foraging toys, even musical instruments. She is safe in her cage and should view it as a safe and good place to go to. Go through some bond building exercises with Lily and your boyfriend. If you are the 'one' for her then she will probably have some jealousy towards him but hopefully it can be lessened. BTW Plum will not tolerate any shows of affection between hubby and I although he loves hubby.

http://www.parrotforums.com/general-parrot-information/49144-tips-bonding-building-trust.html

http://www.parrotforums.com/do-yourself/61373-diy-fleece-swing-instructions-x-small-xx-large.html

http://www.parrotforums.com/cockatoos/52628-poppy-s-favorite-toys-purple-mohawk.html