Separation anxiety?

Skittys_Daddy

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2014
2,172
63
Lewiston, Maine
Parrots
Neotropical Pigeon - "Skittles" (born 3/29/10)
Cockatiel - "Peaches" (1995-2015) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sammy"
(1989-2000) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sandy"
(1987-1989) R.I.P.
Hey, I need some advice. As many of you know, I have several mental health issues. I don't count having conversations with Skittles in other languages to be among them. Neither does he, as he explained to me earlier.

Anyways, in all seriousness, for much of my 'adult' life, the illness that has been the HARDEST to keep in check is my OCD. When I was a teenager and young adult (up to my early-mid 20s), it was my Bipolar that was hardest.

I recently stopped my bedtime anxiety pill because it wasn't doing much other than making me drowsy the next day and I wanted to try something more 'natural' so I switched to Melatonin. Its been fine. My anxiety medication did work, obviously, but IMO not enough to outweigh the side effects.

Problem is, I've noticed an increase in anxiety in the evening. I've experienced dizziness, chest pain, shortness of breath, heart palpitations etc. I know its anxiety and NOT a heart issue BUT I am mindful of taking it seriously regardless. Evenings are my favorite part of the day- particularly late nights because thats when most people aren't around and its 'peaceful'. I also look forward to my "me time" since Skittles is so demanding during the day and I often can't get things done that I want to do but I am able to do what I NEED to do. So I figured if anything, I'd be less stressed after putting him to bed.

I met with my therapist today and we were discussing it again. She asked me what I do during the day and what I do at night and what the difference is. The only difference is Skittles. He's not around here at night, he's in the bedroom. BUT, I've had him for over 8yrs, I imagine that if it were going to be an issue, that it'd have surfaced by now. My therapist then reminded me that I recently went off my anxiety medication and also did a decrease of my OCD medication. (The latter is common, the doses adjust according to the 'irrationality' of thinking). She hit the nail on the head. Within an hour or two of him going to bed I get this tremendous anxiety and irrational fear of dying. He spends about 90% of his time outside of the cage either on me or near me. He spends hours each day either cuddled up to my neck on my shoulder or hanging out inside my shirt. I get used to him being there.

Now that I'm pretty sure I've found the cause, what the heck do I do for a solution? I thought I'd post this here in case anyone else has found themselves with such an issue and maybe they have some thoughts or ideas. My therapist suggested it as well. I did recently invest in 100% pure lavender oil and a diffuser that I use at night in the living room after Skitty goes to bed. I did read that Lavender (100%) is safe.

I'm gonna be discussing all of this much more with my psych when I see her tomorrow, but I REALLY REALLY do NOT want to go on any more meds.

Thanks.:orange:
 
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Inger

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I have a number of hobbies (in fact “starting new hobbies” is practically a hobby in itself LOL) that I find helpful. I knit and crochet-the repetitive motions are calming and really quiet the noise. I’ve recently started “diamond paintings” which require no skill whatsoever but are still fun, and pretty cheap. Coloring is good. I have the stuff to learn calligraphy but I’ve only looked at it. Weirdly, target shooting is great-have to empty your mind of everything and focus on exactly what you’re doing. Puzzles are good.

Some people say exercise helps but I haven’t really tried that for myself.


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plumsmum2005

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Hi, just wondering if you keep busy after Skittles has gone to bed if this would help you in the short term? Take care with the Lavender oil, check for additives to the oil which make it cheaper, as these are the things that are often fatal to our birds. A pure oil would be better, this will be possibly a lot more expensive. Be sure to air the room before bringing Skittles back in, in the morning. Have you tried drinking Chamomile tea? It is possible to buy loose, dried, Chamomile.



Try and live in the now hun, difficult I know. :)
 

RemiBird

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Feb 26, 2019
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I take medication for OCD, anxiety and depression. I know what you mean.
Any time you change the amount of medicine, you are going to experience discomfort. I have been through similar. At one point, I even thought I could do without medication so I decided to slowly wean off of it (talked to my doctor about it first). Let's just say it was not good. Don't want to experience that again.
As far as what to do now, not sure. If you don't want to go back to the same dose of medicine, whatever you were taking, you are going to have to wait it out. Skittles is kind of your security blanket and a distraction. That's why anxiety spikes up when he goes to bed. For me, I always feel better when my husband is around. But, once he leaves for work or whatever, I often feel what you described.
If you want to talk about it more, feel free to pm me. I totally sympathize.
 

noodles123

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Jul 11, 2018
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Could it be a combination of withdrawals and anxiety? I wonder if it will improve once your body adjusts to the decreased medication (?)
Could you spend time walking outdoors or exercising in the evening--might wake you up, but depends on how hard you push I suppose.
The more I exercise, the harder it is to get anxious (once I am seriously exhausted anyway).
 
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Skittys_Daddy

Skittys_Daddy

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Jan 6, 2014
2,172
63
Lewiston, Maine
Parrots
Neotropical Pigeon - "Skittles" (born 3/29/10)
Cockatiel - "Peaches" (1995-2015) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sammy"
(1989-2000) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sandy"
(1987-1989) R.I.P.
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Hey,

Thanks for the replies. I'll reply back in order-

@Inger You are definitely right about that. I actually play on my tablet a lot at night. It has a blue light filter so it doesn't interfere with sleep. I play a number of games on it, but my faves for distraction are: jigsaw, crossstitch and colorbynumber. Though I have a lot of others too. I also have crafts I can do but haven't gotten around to yet (as I'm still in the process of re-organizing). While these DO work for me, for my OCD I don't want to spend my entire night doing puzzles or projects just to keep busy. I want to have some time to do things that don't require much thinking (I've already ruled out politics lol). They also don't get rid of the physical symptoms. They just distract me from them.

@Plumsmom I do try my best to keep busy. Not just because of this issue, but because its the best way to prevent racing thoughts and help keep obsessive thoughts from gaining traction. As for the lavender, I made sure that the kind I bought was 100% Pure with no 'fillers' (whatever that is) and the ONLY ingredient in the one I bought is extracted directly from the lavender plant. I had read that the kind with fillers can actually contain toxic chemicals that could harm or even kill birds. I did have to several dollars more for the pure kind, but nothing is too much when it comes to protecting Skitty. The bottle has only that one ingredient. My living room air purifier is right near Skittles day cage and is running constantly. I'm VERY sensitive to chemical smells and the like so it actually benefits having a bird. I had not considered chamomille tea but I am going to try it.

@Remibird I've never been the type of person to run the medications when I have a problem, so I get what you mean there. I try to be on as few meds as possible but I also know that some conditions may require medications and even therapy in combination. I used to have a habit of stopping my meds when I felt better. I just never considered it as an issue cause I figured going off of a medication when you feel better is logical. Just like with anti-biotics or pain meds. But I never had considered that maybe I was better BECAUSE I was taking the medications because I figured that would be obvious and something only an idiot would do and I never considered myself to be an idiot. Come to find out it has nothing to do with intelligence, but is actually very common in people with mental illness. Once I found that out, I made an effort to remain med compliant. I may take you up on the pm.

@Noodles I had considered that in the beginning. But truth be told, I've done the decrease of the OCD med before and I've even been off of it before when I didn't need it. The medication I used to take for anxiety wasn't a 'strong one' like Xanax or Ativan. It was Vistaril. I used to take Klonopin years ago when I had panic attacks regularly. But having Skittles made it possible for me to 'manage' my symptoms without such a strong medication. But I didn't feel the Vistaril was doing anything more than helping me sleep and I wanted to try something more natural since I've had several non-psych meds added in the past year for non-psych medical issues. Since the Melatonin has helped me sleep at night, I figured it was doing the same as the anxiety medication. Perhaps the Vistaril was doing more for me than I thought. I did see my psych today and we agreed to increase the Luvox back to 300 to see how my OCD adapts.

But for me, its the physical symptoms I feel that are the most bothersome. If it were out of control OCD, well I'd pretty much have a handle on that with meds. But this is different. Its the physical pain I feel that is bothering me. I can only describe it as like "phantom leg syndrome". Its how I feel. I get the physical chest pain on my left shoulder as well as above my heart. These are the places where Skittles spends most of his time. It probably sounds nuts and I originally thought it was as well until my therapist mentioned it and truth be told its the only logical explanation I can think of. As soon as I go to bed and hear him in his cage I begin to feel myself calm down and the symptoms subside. As insane as it sounds. I can't go in there and keep him up so I can feel better.
 
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Talven

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Have you thought about Hemp CBD oil as a treatment? With the near zero amount of THC you don't get high. Like you I am also plagued with mental health issues. Hemp CBD oil is supposed to be very good at helping with depression and anxiety as well as many other things. I looked into it as an alternative to medications. My meds cause weight gain and I'm diabetic so not a great option but it is not really available here in Australia so stuck with it. It might be a little off the wall but the cannabis oil my stepfather takes for his Parkinsons works amazingly so I thought I would suggest it.
 

munami

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Apr 13, 2019
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Ottawa, ON
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I'm not sure if this would help you but these things personally help my husband and I. We both suffer from chronic anxiety and depression.

I found that personally not drinking any caffeine at least 8 hrs from when I have planned to go to bed. At night, an hour before I go to sleep, I try to talk to someone or listen to something. Audio books and podcasts are a favorite. I used to listen to Welcome to Nightvale because I just find Cecil's voice very soothing.

Someone also suggested it but chamomile tea has a calming effect so I drink it in the evenings. If you have any bulk stores, they sell it for like 100g for $3. The loose leaf stuff always tastes better imo. Parrots can drink it too if you choose to share it with Skittles. If you do choose to do that, make sure it's fully cooled and you may have to dilute it for him.

I have heard good things about Lavender but it's never worked personally for me. I feel like regardless, it'll at least smell nice even if it doesn't work. I will tell you though many companies will sell overpriced nicely packaged oils saying that they're "therapeutic quality". There is no such thing. The no name brand oils work just as well.

My husband does take meds as well for his anxiety. He gets two pills. It took him quite a long time to get it just right. He had to try several different meds, different dosages, and different combinations.
It's a really annoying process honestly. It's definitely worth though if you have the money. He's doing much better day to day. It does make him a little more apathetic but the important thing his lows are not nearly as low.
Ultimately, I don't know your situation or anything so I'm not going to tell you that you have to get meds. It's ultimately up to you and your support system.
 

Alehner529

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I second the CBD oil. I have never taken it myself, but my parents give it to their elderly dog to ease arthritis pain and anxiety and it has done wonders for him.

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Skittys_Daddy

Skittys_Daddy

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Jan 6, 2014
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Lewiston, Maine
Parrots
Neotropical Pigeon - "Skittles" (born 3/29/10)
Cockatiel - "Peaches" (1995-2015) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sammy"
(1989-2000) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sandy"
(1987-1989) R.I.P.
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I've heard of the CBD oil, but I'd have to consult with my psych and my PCP before trying it - especially given the variety of meds I take.

That being said, there is a LOT of confusion over the 'legality' of CBD oil at the federal level. Even I couldn't get a straight answer. Cannabis and cannibis-related products ARE legal in Maine for both medicinal and recreational purposes. BUT, federally, its still a banned substance and I live in federal public housing. The landlords here are obsessed with 'micro-management' and any benefit I'd get from the CBD would be cancelled out by the anxiety I'd get out of fear of getting evicted. The landlord wouldn't even allow people to have medicinal marijuana when it was legal only for medical reasons at the state level. Regardless of prescription and even if it was not smoked. They are just power hungry control freaks. tbh.


Once there is a definitive answer on it, I may look into it. But until the answer is crystal clear at the federal level, I'll have to refrain. If I did not live in public housing then it wouldn't be an issue.
 
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Skittys_Daddy

Skittys_Daddy

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Jan 6, 2014
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63
Lewiston, Maine
Parrots
Neotropical Pigeon - "Skittles" (born 3/29/10)
Cockatiel - "Peaches" (1995-2015) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sammy"
(1989-2000) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sandy"
(1987-1989) R.I.P.
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I saw my psych doctor who agreed with my therapist- in terms of the lavender. Both are VERY well aware of Skittles importance to me and what the positive effects of having him are.

That being said, along with the several tips I've read on this thread- I also received some good ideas from people in RL too. One of which I think will be particularly helpful.

I used to take bubble baths regularly in the evenings before I got Skittles. I can honestly say I have NOT taken one since getting him. I've limited myself to just showers because before I got him, I had to shut the bathroom door and lock it in order to take a shower. The steam would build up and make it hard to breathe so I had to keep the temp lower than I'd like because the fan wasn't powerful enough. So I bathed more than I showered. After getting Skittles and knowing his 'alarm system' I can safely take a shower with the door wide open and the fan on so the steam doesn't build up and even Skittles gets a benefit from it. I KNOW that he'll go off IF he sees or hears something out of the ordinary. To top it off, he will 'routinely' fly onto the top of the shower rod and look at me for a few seconds and then fly back onto the towel bars where he sits most of the time when I'm in the bathroom. It's as if he's "checking" on me and it makes me feel VERY secure.

A friend knows about my 'lack of bubble baths' and suggested it so I picked up some of that "Dr" brand pure lavender bubble bath and I'm gonna try that sometime after putting him to bed to see if it helps with the physical symptoms. I'm actually very curious to be honest.

Another suggestion I'm not sure will be helpful is not having him cuddle inside my shirt for a half hour to an hour before his bedtime. The reason for this is- for one he usually doesn't cuddle inside my shirt right before bedtime- he tends to be more 'supervising'. Eventually he'll do his "flock call" and I know its his bedtime. He doesn't have a set bedtime because it all depends on when he wakes up. It is however always between 7:30p-9p about 99% of the time. I'd say MOST of the time its about 7:45p when he does his flock call. I don't put him to bed until he does the call because he will always do it and thats also why I never have a problem getting him to go to sleep in his sleep cage.

BUT I can't say for sure if that won't be helpful cause I honestly don't keep track of the amount of time between his cuddles and bedtime, maybe its not what I think. But I'm gonna try the bubble bath and the chamomile tea ideas as well as maybe adding new activities etc to add some mix to the mix.

Thoughts???
 
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RemiBird

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Do you like to read?
Evening is usually my favorite time. I like to read in bed, with the lamp on, quiet time, yes, nice warm cup of tea next to me and my dog.
Try it.
 
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Skittys_Daddy

Skittys_Daddy

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2014
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Lewiston, Maine
Parrots
Neotropical Pigeon - "Skittles" (born 3/29/10)
Cockatiel - "Peaches" (1995-2015) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sammy"
(1989-2000) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sandy"
(1987-1989) R.I.P.
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@Remibird Yes, I do like to read, however, I am pretty limited on my reading. For some reason, it puts me to sleep so I don't do it very much. lol.

@Cardinal I checked out that link but I just briefly skimmed it, I'm gonna give it a closer view later this evening.

We used to do 'meditation' when I was in the hospital and group homes but it always involved "clearing your head" and going to a different place. I just never benefited from that. I either found it to be funny or useless. I talked to my therapist about it and she told me that I was taught wrong and thats not meditation. When she explained what it really is I told her I could see that as potentional usefull. She told me it involves finding ONE thing and focusing on that and letting all other thoughts fall away. That could be helpful because thats what I have to do with my PC games that I play- puzzles and strategies etc. I just don't want to have to sit in front of a tv or pc playing games to stay sane. Its not healthy.

I think having people with mental illness do "clear your mind" activities is stupid. Stupid because its not possible. Focusing activities however, is.

One of my friends who LOVES to BRAG about having a degree in social work (she got it over 20yrs ago and hasn't been in practice since and when she was, it was barely any). Anyways, she was telling me that she doesn't think it has anything to do with Skittles or with my OCD and that its all in my head. When I try to explain to her about OCD, she claims she 'gets it' but she clearly doesn't. She's of the "just don't think about it" or "just don't let it happen". Why not tell a diabetic not to let their blood sugar become abnormal? Sure, there are things you can do to alleviate conditions you have to a point and also things you can do to decrease or increase symptoms etc, but you can't "turn off" a medical condition. Funny though, she can't "turn off" her family drama or "turn off" her laziness. Okay, enough venting. lol.
 
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Talven

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One of my friends who LOVES to BRAG about having a degree in social work (she got it over 20yrs ago and hasn't been in practice since and when she was, it was barely any). Anyways, she was telling me that she doesn't think it has anything to do with Skittles or with my OCD and that its all in my head. When I try to explain to her about OCD, she claims she 'gets it' but she clearly doesn't. She's of the "just don't think about it" or "just don't let it happen". Why not tell a diabetic not to let their blood sugar become abnormal? Sure, there are things you can do to alleviate conditions you have to a point and also things you can do to decrease or increase symptoms etc, but you can't "turn off" a medical condition. Funny though, she can't "turn off" her family drama or "turn off" her laziness. Okay, enough venting. lol.

I can relate. My father is a trained councilor and told me that my bipolar is just in my head and I need to get over it and stop being so silly. It's not the first time someone in the family has said something of a similar thing. Most "normal" people are incapable of understanding as it is beyond their imagination.

Personally I look at the world now as filled with vanilla people or those with flavour. Vanilla people while very popular aren't all that interesting to talk to as they have a limited understanding of the real world. Those of us with flavour on the other hand, we have to have a greater understanding so we can be accepted by the vanilla people and blend in. People with flavour aren't limited to the mentally ill either, those unlucky few who have seen the harsh reality of the world we live in also have the dubious honour of being flavoured. Seems a little nuts but it makes it easier to dismiss the ignorant as being vanilla rather than letting their views skew mine.

Well now I've unleashed a little of my crazy on everyone I shall go find other ways to spread it around muahahaha . . .
 

Rudustin

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I haven't weighed in on this thread but I would like to express my sympathy and empathy about your situation. Several years ago as a result of neighbors complaining and the fact that i had lost a partner to cancer, I had to rehome two Macaws, a Hyacinth and a Greenwing, that I had for 27 years! It was horrible to do so and I felt so upset about doing so. It has been years since then and then last year in November I decided to have a smaller bird and I purchased a Golden Bavarian Conure and named him Muffin. Recently in May also got a lavender Indian Ring Neck named Blueberry. I realized that I missed not having birds in my home and because they are smaller and easier to take care of it has been a blessing to hear and watch and play with my new pet kids. It makes me less anxious and I live alone so they are great company for me. I have grown very attached and my neighbors are so accepting of their voices and considering a Macaws call this is nothing in comparison. I don't have all the issues that you have emotionally but I was with someone for eighteen years who was depressed and eventually had to be medicated for his depression. Pet's were a great solace for him and because I was traveling a great deal he was the main care giver of our bird children. I have a tendency to be hyper and I need a great deal of distraction to keep me busy or I begin to obsess about nothing so I guess you could call that a degree of OCD. I could clean my apartment over and over again if I don't have something to distract me. I find that having the birds is that distraction but when they are asleep around eight in the evening I have eight tanks of tropical fish which seems to calm me after the parrot kids are asleep. It's only an idea but I get caught up in watching the fish until I go to bed. I'm not sure if that is an interest of yours but it is something I have cultivated and it really works for me. I have an aquarium in almost every room in my home with the exception of the kitchen. It's only a suggestion and I wish you the very best in solving this issue.
 
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Skittys_Daddy

Skittys_Daddy

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Jan 6, 2014
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Lewiston, Maine
Parrots
Neotropical Pigeon - "Skittles" (born 3/29/10)
Cockatiel - "Peaches" (1995-2015) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sammy"
(1989-2000) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sandy"
(1987-1989) R.I.P.
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Oh my situation is fine in terms of Skittles noise. It used to be VERY difficult cause he would go on and on and on when he didn't get his way. I had to completely retrain him and it took over a year to do it correctly. I live in public housing so its VERY difficult to evict someone for noise complaints. The rules in my lease say in order for a noise complaint to be valid it has to go on persistently for ten minutes or more OR intermittently for 30 minutes or more. My landlord actually told me if noise became a problem that was persistent that they'd install 'sound barriers'. But I don't think that'd ever become a problem to be honest. I couldn't even deal with him going on for over 10 minutes. On top of that, the landlord said it has to be 'witnessed' by a housing employee. If he misbehaves and doesn't quiet down after needs are met (it happens on occasion).

It actually happened this afternoon, I was on the phone and I told him to 'stop' but he wouldn't so I pointed to his day cage and said 'go' and he actually went in on his own. lol. I thought it was hilarious.

Skittles gets hours and hours of attention every day and both he and I are used to it but the down side is it would be incredibly difficult to find a new owner who'd give him the same amount of freedom (he's free-flighted) and attention I do if something should happen to me.
 

fiddlejen

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... but when they are asleep around eight in the evening I have eight tanks of tropical fish which seems to calm me after the parrot kids are asleep. It's only an idea but I get caught up in watching the fish until I go to bed .

So I was reading this thread with many thoughts. (My childhood/y.a. best friend had/still has Severe OCD, etc.) But from your first post I wondered if it might help you maybe, just a little, to get yourself like a little goldfish or Betta, or other suchlike LOW-maintenance little fishy, for a smidgen of company after Skittles goes to bed.

Just a thought of course. Feel free ignore if it doesn't seem best for you! :orange:
 
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Skittys_Daddy

Skittys_Daddy

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Jan 6, 2014
2,172
63
Lewiston, Maine
Parrots
Neotropical Pigeon - "Skittles" (born 3/29/10)
Cockatiel - "Peaches" (1995-2015) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sammy"
(1989-2000) R.I.P.
Budgie - "Sandy"
(1987-1989) R.I.P.
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@Talven I have a sister who used to be like that. She's an engineer and was of the mind that if you can't see it with your eyes or feel it with your hands that it doesn't exist. Needless to say, she has since become a parent to two children and she has changed a LOT. Now she suddenly 'gets it'. lol. Bipolar is a chemical imbalance in the brain, its a brain disease and people need to know that. Its not in peoples head and its not because people can't control their emotions. Its not different than diabetes or a blood disorder. Its the fact that your body either makes too much or not enough of something. Its really that simple. But many people don't see that. Sometimes its the simplest things that people don't understand or its something so complex they just ignore it rather than try to understand it.

One thing I've also noticed in life is that people who have pets seem to have an ability to at least try to understand and have a degree of compassion that you rarely find in people who don't. I think its because trying to understand a pet is much more complicated than trying to understand another person. People can be ignored, pets cannot so it forces owners to 'think outside the box'.

@Rudustin The thing for me was the surprising onset. I'm used to feeling all sorts of emotions, but I didn't realize how much of an effect it was having on me physically. The ironic thing is, I've only become more med compliant since getting Skittles. Having him and taking care of him has made me take care of myself.

@fiddlejen I used to have fish years and years ago. I had a big aquarium, but it was so much work I got rid of it. But a small tank is certainly an option. I may look into that.

Thanks to both of you for the idea. On another note, I've actually been finding the lavender oil to be incredible helpful. I still don't understand how, but I get it since I have certain scents that bring back very pleasant memories.
 

AmyMyBlueFront

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Jonesy a Goffins 'Too who had to be rehomed :-(

And a Normal Grey Cockatiel named BB who came home with me on 5/20/2016.
Wow..and I yhought I was the only one "off my rocker" so to speak (J/K of course,mental illness is NO laughing matter and VERY real!) I too suffer from severe depression and anxiety and am on two kinds of head meds..30mg of mirtazapine in the am and 30mg duloxetine hcl before bed. In all honesty..they do SQUAT for me! Some days I can't/don't want to get out of bed..BUT I have to..the fids need food and Amy needs his heart med every day. I'd be a murderer if I didn't get my glutious maximus out of bed and that will NEVER happen! If it weren't for Amy and The Beebs I wouldn't be here typing this,or even breathing. In the last two years I have lost my job (trucker) my HOUSE and have had not one,but TWO heart attacks,to add to the two PREVIOUSLY and lost a friend of 45 years who took his own life :15: I am also type two diabetic and of course high BP.
My ex wife has severe MS...she has had it sinse she was 16y.o. she is now 55y.o.
She swears by cannibus oil and medical reefer in general. Couldn't stand smokin' the stuff as a teen lol. And she is into the herbal stuff. Lavinder oil and petuily and others..said it helps with hr MS very noticeably. She has gone as far as giving me "sample" roll-on's to try but they don't do a thing for me..also listening to certain types of music before bedtime..and drinking the tea! It all helps her..I guess i'm the odd-ball...:eek: My fids are my life line..without them there is no ME!


jim
 

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