How to hug him :)?

We have 2y old male eclectus. My two daughters and the wife can do almost anything with him (cuddling, hugging) and the youngest daugther can also trim his claws . When I am cooking, eating... etc he is the first on my shoulder and in my plate ... but no touching, my hands are a pure evil to him. How to change it?

I know he is still young- but now is the time to set the standard- NO CUDDLING OR HUGGING- you guys are literally setting yourselves up for disaster in terms of sexual frustration. Head and neck petting only! It's so important...even if the bird likes the "cuddles"-also, no shadowy spaces in the cage or access to these places around the cage. It is SO important...
They mature around 3 years and you MUST stop this well in advance or it will transition into something very unwholesome...and aggressive.
They also often push away from their favorites (as babies) in favor of someone new (at maturity) and you will likely be that person---but again, BOUNDARIES ARE KEY....touching that way is pure sex.

As humans "hugs" seem sweet- but it's not neutral to them at all...their whole goal is to find a mate, and in the wild, only a mate or parent would get that close. If you cannot have sex with your bird, do not tell it that you can.

Thank you, in fakt I know all of this already, and my question was suppose to be rather in fun form , so I just ask the proper question right away, is he going to trust me some day and how to convince him?

probably- associate yourself with positive treats (non-sexual) asnd don't push the relationship- he will move when he's ready

What I've noticed for our boy is that he prefers to operate on his own timeline. He prefers people who observe his body language and respond accordingly. If you force him to step up when he's not in the mood or ready, he will first try to push your hand away gently. If that doesn't work, he grows resentful and starts to dislike your hands.

Another thing is he dislikes sudden movement hand movement around himself unless you are the person who trained him for such thing. I have worked on training him to be more malleable with me (I am his primary caregiver, so I need to be able to check his physiological health), so I can get away with more things around him. My partner has not had such training sessions, so our boy is a bit more flighty around his hands.

That leads me to question what sort of association does he have with your hands? Do your hands try to touch him when he doesn't want to be touched? Do your hands try to grab him when he doesn't want to be held? Do your hands force a step up when he's not interested? Do your hands not offer any treats, whether outside or inside training sessions?


Now, ekkies are not known to be touchy birds. Most don't like being touched at all. Some will tolerate it if you train them or if they see you as a sexual partner.

Don't expect to ever be able to touch your ekkie, apart from having him step up. If you get a step up, that's more than enough.

Our boy (2.5yo ekkie) sees any touch outside of training situations as sexual. I can't even touch his head without triggering regurgitation and humping. So you can imagine I can't even touch his body. Our only touch comes in the form of our training sessions. Which means the only person touching him is me, not even my partner.


Just be careful with your wife and daughters, depending on the subspecies mix. While there is little research done on Papua New Guinea and Indonesian ekkies, Australian ekkies are known to be poly - they have multiple mates, so he could be viewing your wife and daughters as potential mates. In which case, you must make sure he doesn't get frustrated; if he gets frustrated, he could lash out at not just you, the rival, but also at them for leading him on but not responding to his advances.

Wow wish I read up more on them. I had cocktoos and a few other birds large number small all were cool. I just bought a pair of babies just 3 months old when I got them. They step up fine and I can handle them fine. I can opt them on there backs and fronts. But not always. Also if I touch one the other is not happy runs over to nip me lol. Notherwise hard but not like when they step up. My plan is to raise babies as I did this before with cocktoos n tiels. I do like to play with them but it does not go well. Now I know why lol.

If anot experienced ekie owner could be so kind to pm me , I would love a phone conversation on few topics. Thanks in advance . Al d

Feeding so far is OK. I do veggies , sprouts , and pellets made for them and seeds from lafibers. I spray them 4 times a week or so.

Eclectus parrots have a different type of feather than other parrots, and most, as has been pointed out, do not like being scratched like other parrots do, if at all. Other parrots like being scratched against the lie of the feathers. Ekies, if even they allow it, like it with the lie of the feathers.

ALRAINBOW said:

If anot experienced ekie owner could be so kind to pm me , I would love a phone conversation on few topics. Thanks in advance . Al d

Feeding so far is OK. I do veggies , sprouts , and pellets made for them and seeds from lafibers. I spray them 4 times a week or so.

Click to expand...

You might want to do some research into their diet. They have different needs than other parrots and may not tolerate pellets well.


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