should I give him up??

MarciaLove

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Jan 4, 2012
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USA Georgia
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Sugar the Blue Crown Conure♂, Merlin the Camelot Macaw♂
Ok so ive had my Umbrella Cockatoo for four months now and he is the sweetest bird but we havent really bonded that much :/ I spend multiple hours a day with him every day and sometimes i bring him to work all day and we just havent formed a special bond like I have with my other birds. for example whenever a man comes in the room its like I dont exist apparently he like men better. Its not the fact that he picks any guy over me that makes me think I may rehome him though, its the fact that we just havent bonded like he likes me to snuggle him and hold him but well I dont know how to explain it its just I dont feel that bond with him that I do with my other birds. What do you guys think?? I HATE to rehome birds but I think it might be for the best here Im just not sure :(
 

MikeyTN

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"Dixie"LSC2, and "Nico" Scarlet Macaw.
That's a choice for you to decide! Sometime when they make up their minds like that its hard to change! He may or may not be better off with a new owner that's a guy. It's not a easy decision to make.
 
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MarciaLove

MarciaLove

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Jan 4, 2012
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USA Georgia
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Sugar the Blue Crown Conure♂, Merlin the Camelot Macaw♂
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thank you I know i have to decide but I really dont want to make the wrong decision like I said I hate having to rehome birds I feel like I am being irresponsible ive only ever rehomed two birds before because I couldnt keep them.
 

Blancaej

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Apr 5, 2013
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Middlebury, VT
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CAG Quincy - BD 3/27/00. Gotcha 6/00 ~ GW Macaw Savannah - BD 6/21/93. Gotcha 4/13 ~ B&G Macaw Coqui - BD 9/3/03. Gotcha 10/13 ~ Blue Crown Conure Sidney - BD Unknown Approx 5 Years Old. Gotcha 6/15/
He could just have a different personality. Too's seem to me to be more intense then other species emotionally. Maybe you just need to find something you can do together that you both enjoy. Is he harness trained? Have you considered getting him out to fly. Maybe that would make him happier and bring him closer to you.

It is very much a tough decision but it really has to be your decision. If it doesn't feel right, maybe it's for the best. But just stop and think to yourself, will he really be better off? It's only been 4 months, maybe you both need more time before you make a decision. Good luck in working that out.
 

legal_eagle

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Feb 28, 2013
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Green Cheek Conure Pee-Wee
No, I don't think you should rehome him for the reason you've described. Why not just accept him for what he is?
 
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MarciaLove

MarciaLove

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USA Georgia
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Sugar the Blue Crown Conure♂, Merlin the Camelot Macaw♂
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I have harness trained him and we go outside a lot ive tried to get him to fly but he doesnt like it because his flight feathers are a bit choppy from his previous owners clip job but he can fly.
 

Blancaej

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CAG Quincy - BD 3/27/00. Gotcha 6/00 ~ GW Macaw Savannah - BD 6/21/93. Gotcha 4/13 ~ B&G Macaw Coqui - BD 9/3/03. Gotcha 10/13 ~ Blue Crown Conure Sidney - BD Unknown Approx 5 Years Old. Gotcha 6/15/
Maybe you should try again once the feathers come in and are not choppy. I wouldn't give up on the relationship just after 4 months. That is my personal opinion. But it is up to you in the end. :)
 

Pinkbirdy

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Feb 26, 2013
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Clifton Springs Newyork
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macaw,LS2,congo grey,2Blk Hd caiques,Hawkhead,yellowstrk lory,Blue frnt amazon,sun conure ,Yellow sided greencheek ,Goffin ,Rosebreasted Cockatoo,Greenwing Macaw,Blue and Gold Macaw,Nanday conure,Ecle
Umbrellas are not easy birds [hes not giving you a problem]. You take such good care of your birds. I would worry what the next home might be like. Maybe he will be upset [and they would have a hard time. What Im getting at I wouldn't mess around with a rehomed Too [That seems happy with you]. I have birds that my relationship has changed even more for the positive after a year or longer. Four months isn't long. I know its hard when they don't bond right of the bat. My advice accept what relationship hes giving you .Im sure it will develop more :) Good Luck
 

kq_fan

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Lilo - Female Green Cheek Conure ~ Pal - male cockatiel ~ Pheobe - female cockatiel
No I don't think you should. You have only had him a few months, that isn't long at all. So just give him time he might eventually be comfy in his home and I don't think he would be to happy going from house to house. U2 are veary...... Different and it might not end well in a nother home. So just give it time, good luck!
 

crimson

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same here, 4 months is not that long to develop a solid relationship, hang in there, it just might get better
 

strudel

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Personally, I don't consider how it is for me with my pets (unless there were a serious issue like getting mauled or something dangerous). I just consider them. My newest (now only) dog is a bit of a "psycho", he's a rescue and has issues, but we've found a comfortable relationship and he's improving all the time at overcoming his fears and learning to trust me. If I am honest, I don't love him the way I loved "my" dog who I had for a long time from a puppy, she was my special girl, but I love him in a different way. So, he's not as terrific as other dogs I've had or might have. He's MY dog and I'll look after him and love him.

If you don't really like this bird (which is what it boils down to, really, isn't it?) the bird will pick up on it. That's one thing I believe after having a menagerie and riding horses and interacting with lots of different animals. You don't have to do anything, they know when you are afraid of them, annoyed or upset or whatever. He might be going to others rather than you because you are giving off a "vibe". Try to find something to love so that your "vibe" changes. If you really can't come to a point where you find something to love, then rehome then, but I'd give it some more time.
 

torrap

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Jun 10, 2013
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CO, USA
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Marley-YSA (hen) -hatched 07/20/2006;
Simba-DYHA (hen)-hatched 06/23/2003
OMG, I was reading your post with amazement ....... it's exactly how I would describe my relation with my YSA I have for about 4 months.
The minute any male person walks into my house, she forgets all about me and even flies to their shoulders (she never sits on my shoulder).
She loves me when there is no male people in my house (which is most of the time).
I had the same question in my head all the time for the first 3 months, but the thought that she could be in the worse situation if I gave her up, makes me stop thinking about it.
I think my daughter made it easier for me when after my complaining about it, she just said....Mom, the World is not perfect.....
I was thinking about it.....I don't have a person I would like to be with and so as she......LOL ....At least we have this thing in common.....LOL
 

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