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-   -   Poppy’s Continuing Journey (http://www.parrotforums.com/incredible-journeys-bird-stories-bird-lovers/79377-poppy-s-continuing-journey.html)

Allee 02-09-2019 04:33 PM

Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Some of you may remember I stepped down as a moderator a few months ago and have only recently returned. 2018 was a long stressful year for my family. I’ve always heard the term heartbreak used in casual conversation, over the last few months I’ve felt my heart shatter more than once.

I’m sharing Poppy’s ongoing story for a couple of reasons, one because Poppy was a celebrity here on ParrotForums and the members of our amazing community made my time with Poppy a journey to celebrate. Thank you for all the advice, the support, the love and the joy. Here’s proof, we are a powerful group and we can improve the lives of parrots and their humans one bird at a time.

The second reason I’m sharing Poppy’s story is because of the number of times this ugly word comes up. Rehome is not a word we ever want to hear. Owners should plan better, you should never adopt a bird you can’t commit to forever, never make a promise you can’t keep, try everything before you make the decision to rehome. I did all those things. It wasn’t enough.

We adopted Poppy in September of 2013. She was traumatized, terrified and cagebound, very unhappy U2, bad diet, bad health, bad attitude and a few bad behaviors she had learned in a previous home. We addressed her issues one at a time, we got to know each other, her health improved, she loved her new cage, especially the balcony, the quakers loved her, my family and friends loved her, I absolutely adored her, I still do. Poppy and I worked so hard on her training. She learned to run out of her cage when the door was opened for her, she learned to perch on forearms instead of shoulders, she learned to play rather than scream, we all loved her indoor voice and cockatoo gibberish. I kept reading horror stories about cockatoos and thinking how fortunate we were to have such a sweet, well adjusted U2. I never thought it would end.

In July of 2017 we adopted a Congo African Grey named Jack and a beautiful Yellow Naped Amazon named Bingo. This was okay with Poppy until it wasn’t. She didn’t care for her new flock mates and voiced her opinions loudly, we moved Poppy into a room of her own and added more training sessions and one on one time, this helped and things improved enough to be manageable.

I met a wonderful woman, a hairdresser, I liked her immediately and got to know her a little better every time she did my hair. Before I mentioned living with a U2 she told me how much and for how long she had wanted one. I think even then I had a haunting premonition of what was to come.

I have two incredible human sons, our youngest served 14 years in the U.S.A.F. He served in the desserts of Afghanistan, lived in Las Vegas and Alaska and saw a lot of faraway places. After a devastating spinal injury and major surgery his military career ended with an honorable discharge. That was three years ago. I tried to connect with this adult I no longer knew, this beautiful child I had known better than I knew myself, this angry, disillusioned young man that is my son. As often happens, when a person is at the most vulnerable point in their life an opportunistic monster comes along to take advantage, for my son the monster was a woman he knew from high school. The relationship was a disaster from day one, they had a profound effect on other and nothing about it was positive in any way, shape or form. My husband and I tried our best to form a new relationship with our son, we went to the island of Oahu with our son and his fantasy girl for eight days, sometimes truth hurts, this woman was a train wreck, no room for denial. For some reason in my son’s confused brain I became the focus of his anger at the world, the military, the entire medical community and all its associates..... After the trip I distanced myself out of respect for my son, I knew there was no hope of a reconciliation with his girlfriend or with him as long as he was under her influence. My son and I who have always had a deep bond exchanged texts with each other, our only communication for a few months.

On the evening of 9/11 2018, I got a phone call from my son, he said he’d broke some glass then he promptly hung up. His father called me back, a conference call with my youngest and his older brother. The call came during a terrible storm, my son asked for help with his father and brother as witnesses. I drove for 45 minutes in a downpour and found my son standing in the storm wearing only a pair of shorts. I brought him home, of course I did, the next morning I drove back for his precious ESA dog Janey, he had forgotten her the night before.

PTSD is up close, personal and extremely scary and there’s no easy fix. Poppy had a dramatic and immediate reaction to my son, Stormy. Stress levels were through the roof and Poppy visibly felt it. She began screaming, it’s hard to explain, I don’t know if he reminded her of someone, it wasn’t like she was afraid of him, more like she could feel his emotions. I tried everything I could possibly try. The other birds and the dogs showed signs of stress but they were able to adjust to the changes and it helped that all of them either liked or were fascinated by Stormy. Not Poppy, she would visibly tremble and hide at the sight of him. She was a habitual screamer when she first came to us, I watched my gorgeous, well adjusted girl come completely unraveled. I knew I had to make the right decision for her. I called Misty, the hairdresser I had known for a year. She was delighted, she had waited a very long time for her dream bird.

After I made my decision, I spent two weeks telling my beautiful girl Goodby. We played her favorite games, I put her in her carrier and kept her beside me, we took long car rides that she loved. I cooked her favorite foods, made her a new swing for her new home, packed everything that belonged to her, her hat collection, her piano, all her favorite possessions. I could hear my heart breaking but the tears were for me, not Poppy. I just knew she was going on an incredible new adventure. I also knew I could trust Misty to give Poppy the life she deserves.

My husband and son went with me to deliver Poppy to her new home and her new Mommy. We set up her cage, I told Misty about Poppy’s diet and gave her a month’s worth of dry food and a fresh batch of birdie bread. I had already said Goodby to my sweet girl, it was time for Hellos and new beginnings, Poppy climbed out on the door of her cage and reached for Misty, she stepped onto Misty’s wrist and tucked her sweet face under Misty’s chin. I did not cry in front of these people that could never understand, I cried later, for hours, alone. This is the first and only time I will share this very personal story with you, the people who know what it’s like to live with and love parrots.

Poppy, you’ll always be my sunshine. Please forgive me. There was no other choice I could make, Baby Girl. Be happy, be loved, be you.

I made a slideshow of some of my favorite photos of Poppy.




This is a photo of Poppy with her beautiful mommy, Misty.


GaleriaGila 02-09-2019 04:41 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Wow. Courage and love can take many forms, as you well know and show, dear Allee. Sometimes that can be the r-word... re-home.
Thanks for sharing. I know it will help a lot of people.
Wow.
This is a read-reread, for sure.

Allee 02-09-2019 04:50 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Thank you for the kind words, Gail. I love you, Sweet Lady.

Laurasea 02-09-2019 05:24 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Awww I cried. I understand. I very firmly believe that that some birds belong in different homes, for the wellness if both parties. I've seen traumatized birds that were selfishly held onto. When it's done with love and much thinking it can be the best thing. It's only a terrible thing when it's done with no thought, and for selfish reasons. I hope Poppy has a wonderful and fulfilled life with her new mommy.
I also hope your son heals, abd your family heals. And you take time to enjoy the little unexpected beauties each day holds. Mine today was the joy my neighbor, whome I am helping make his yard wildlife friendly, had his first goldfinche visit. He was blown away by the color. :)
I'm glad you shared your burden with us, and I hope you can feel it lighten!

Allee 02-09-2019 05:45 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Thank you, Laura! That means a lot. I wish all parrots could find a home as amazing as the one I found for Poppy, it makes all the difference. Sometimes a higher a power brings special people into our lives at exactly the right moment.

You are so right. Never take for granted those special moments and life’s wonders that make the world a brighter place. A wildlife friendly yard is a great way to find your zen.

HEEDLESS 02-09-2019 06:41 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Heartbroken when you have to re-home your baby... **hugs**
I know that feeling when you know your baby will be no longer with you.

Either it's pet or child, the feeling is the same. I feel yours just like when my son has end it with me.

I am glad that mom, Misty loves her just like you did.


**CHUUUUUUUUU**

Tami2 02-09-2019 07:21 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Thank you for sharing such a personal and difficult story with us. I cried as well.

I’m very sorry about your son and I will pray for him and your family.
I can’t even imagine what you are all going through. They say God doesn’t give you more than you can handle, I wonder about that sometimes.

As heartbreaking and stressful as it was to part ways with your beautiful Poppy.
The bright side is that you had the perfect new mommy right there and you not only know her, you trust her. Because of that relationship, you’ll always be involved and a part of Poppy’s life. You did what any good parront would do because you love her and wants what’s best for her.

This is indeed a happy ending for Poppy.

May God keep you all in his blessings.

(((HUGS)))

LaManuka 02-09-2019 07:24 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Allee I am in tears and in complete awe of your strength and courage. Are you still in touch with Poppy? Either way I wish you happiness in the coming year and beyond, I hope somehow your son finds his way back to you and the infinite love you clearly have in your heart ... I gotta go find a tissue (or several!) now ...

Allee 02-09-2019 09:21 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by HEEDLESS (Post 796860)
Heartbroken when you have to re-home your baby... **hugs**
I know that feeling when you know your baby will be no longer with you.

Either it's pet or child, the feeling is the same. I feel yours just like when my son has end it with me.

I am glad that mom, Misty loves her just like you did.


**CHUUUUUUUUU**

Lily, thank you so much. I know you understand from experience and I truly appreciate your kindness. Seeing you reunited with your precious Kise was such a happy moment. Kise and Poppy are both very fortunate birds due to amazing people willing and able to help. Thier stories make me feel humble and very grateful.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tami2 (Post 796866)
Thank you for sharing such a personal and difficult story with us. I cried as well.

I’m very sorry about your son and I will pray for him and your family.
I can’t even imagine what you are all going through. They say God doesn’t give you more than you can handle, I wonder about that sometimes.

As heartbreaking and stressful as it was to part ways with your beautiful Poppy.
The bright side is that you had the perfect new mommy right there and you not only know her, you trust her. Because of that relationship, you’ll always be involved and a part of Poppy’s life. You did what any good parront would do because you love her and wants what’s best for her.

This is indeed a happy ending for Poppy.

May God keep you all in his blessings.

(((HUGS)))

Tami, thank you so much for the hugs, prayers and understanding, it means a lot. I honestly don’t know what kind of story I would be writing had I not met Misty when I did, the president’s security guards may not have been so carefully vetted, Misty met all the qualifications and then some.

We all have challenges in life, I’ve repeated the serenity prayer a lot this past year. I’ve also wondered about the no burden to heavy to bear thing, sometimes it feels pretty heavy. I’m very happy for Poppy even though I miss her more than words can convey.



Quote:

Originally Posted by LaManuka (Post 796867)
Allee I am in tears and in complete awe of your strength and courage. Are you still in touch with Poppy? Either way I wish you happiness in the coming year and beyond, I hope somehow your son finds his way back to you and the infinite love you clearly have in your heart ... I gotta go find a tissue (or several!) now ...

Awww, thank you so very much, I appreciate you crying with me but remember to laugh for Poppy, she’s happy and that’s what matters most. I’m happy to say I am still in touch with Poppy and Misty. I invited Misty to join us on ParrotForums and I kind of think she will. She’ll always be my hero and Poppy’s.

Terry57 02-09-2019 10:35 PM

Re: Poppy’s Continuing Journey
 
Allee, I am so glad you shared this, and I know how difficult it was for you to do.
My friend, I have been in awe of you since I have known you, an my respect and admiration for you has only grown over the years. Watching you deal with everything life has thrown at you in the last year has been heartbreaking, yet also inspiring. You are the strongest woman I know, and the strength and love you have shown during this, not only for Stormy but for Poppy as well is nothing short of incredible.

Sometimes things happen that we had no way of anticipating, and you put Poppy first, before your own feelings. You took in a bird who was damaged by her previous life, and slowly you put her pieces back together. I shudder to think of how Poppy would be now if she hadn't had you as a stepping stone to get her to where she is now. Your love made it possible for her to go to a good home, to someone who had waited years for her to come along. She has nothing to forgive you for, and I know that if Poppy could tell you, she would say thank you. Thank you for taking her in and changing her life, and thank you for finding the new wonderful home she is in now.

Your love and loyalty to those you love are like nothing I have ever seen before, and I count myself so lucky to be a part of your circle.

Thank you for illustrating that the right thing is all too often the hardest thing to do, but you did it for Poppy, and for Stormy. You are amazing, and I love you for being the wonderful person that you are.


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