Advice Needed.

I just posted in the Introduction Section and I'm sorry to arrive with a problem. This past Sunday, I adopted Scarlet, a year-old lovebird with 1 foot missing. She was born without it and is well-adjusted. Her owner, a friend, passed away last week. It is my pleasure to have Scarlet. I know she is very stressed over the loss of her owner. She eats a little but mostly just sits. I have 1 canary, 2 parakeets and 6 finches. I talk to her a lot. She knows me and is not afraid of me. What can I do to help? I am worried. Thanks.

Poor Scarlet! She must surely miss her owner. It is very scary to be in a new place with strangers. I know I would be frightened. You are doing great by just sitting and talking to her. Soft voice, lots of praise. Find a yummy treat maybe some millet or nutriberries and drop it in her bowl through out the day and keep walking. In time she will realize you mean no harm. It will take time and patience. So glad she has found a loving home with you.

greycloud said:

Poor Scarlet! She must surely miss her owner. It is very scary to be in a new place with strangers. I know I would be frightened. You are doing great by just sitting and talking to her. Soft voice, lots of praise. Find a yummy treat maybe some millet or nutriberries and drop it in her bowl through out the day and keep walking. In time she will realize you mean no harm. It will take time and patience. So glad she has found a loving home with you.

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Thanks, greycloud. I have Scarlet's cage next to the cages of my other birds. I thought it would be better for her to be near them. I have 1 canary, 2 parakeets and 6 finches, all in separate cages. I thought they would help to make her feel at home. Do you agree or am I making it too hard for her to get used to me and them. Thanks.

I agree with greycloud it will take some time and patience, it sounds as though your on the right path, I would just give Scarlet some time to settle in and get used to her new surroundings, thank you for taking her in and making her part of your family, I'm sure Scarlet thanks you too.

Also agree with advice to just take it slow and let her settle. As long as she is drinking and eating some and droppings don't change significantly, she should be okay in the end. Other birds nearby are okay. You have decided apparently not to quarantine but if she seems really blue, you might experiment with having her closer to you and away from your bird room. Did your friend handle her, take her out, talk to her? If so, consider that since she already knows you. If not, that should wait. Try to keep her to whatever schedule your friend used.

And may I say, you are a good friend to let her know that her bird would have a loving home with you. Welcome to the forum.

Bobby34231 said:

I agree with greycloud it will take some time and patience, it sounds as though your on the right path, I would just give Scarlet some time to settle in and get used to her new surroundings, thank you for taking her in and making her part of your family, I'm sure Scarlet thanks you too.

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Thank you. It's just a sad situation because Scarlet's owner lived alone and they had a very, very strong bond. Although Scarlet knows me, she is really sad. Also, her owner died suddenly. I appreciate your support.

You know, you and Scarlet are both grieving right now. Give yourselves time to mourn and heal. I imagine that you will grow together through this as she does know you. Do you have anything at all from your friend's house that the bird might find familiar? Just a thought... thinking about both you and your bird today.

bogo1 said:

Also agree with advice to just take it slow and let her settle. As long as she is drinking and eating some and droppings don't change significantly, she should be okay in the end. Other birds nearby are okay. You have decided apparently not to quarantine but if she seems really blue, you might experiment with having her closer to you and away from your bird room. Did your friend handle her, take her out, talk to her? If so, consider that since she already knows you. If not, that should wait. Try to keep her to whatever schedule your friend used.

And may I say, you are a good friend to let her know that her bird would have a loving home with you. Welcome to the forum.

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Thank you for your advice. I took Scarlet to my avian vet (same vet as deceased owner used) and that's why I didn't quarantine her. Scarlet is in good health. Yes, my friend did handle her. In fact, Scarlet used to ride around on her shoulder in their living room. Should I start with just gently putting my hand in her cage while talking to her? All my birds are in my living room, not a separate room. I could move her closer to my favorite chair where I watch TV, read, etc. Sorry, if these are stupid questions but I've had birds all my life but not this situation. Poor Scarlet was born without 1 leg and now lost her Mommie.

bogo1 said:

You know, you and Scarlet are both grieving right now. Give yourselves time to mourn and heal. I imagine that you will grow together through this as she does know you. Do you have anything at all from your friend's house that the bird might find familiar? Just a thought... thinking about both you and your bird today.

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Thank you for your kind thoughts. It is a very, very sad time for both of us. Yes, I have a quilt that my friend would put around her when Scarlet was on her shoulder on their couch. She also did beautiful latch-hook pillows that I will put out. I took them as a remembrance and Scarlet would definitely recognize them. A litttle reminder of her former owner and home. Great idea. Thanks.

You know, normally, I would say, let her settle. But, since your friend handled her, and you handled her at your friends, I would say, move her close to you and sit by her and open the door. If, because she is one legged, your friend would lift her to bring her out, consider trying that. Try to mimic your friend's behavior with her. It is very possible being close will help you both. Thinking of you.

bogo1 said:

You know, normally, I would say, let her settle. But, since your friend handled her, and you handled her at your friends, I would say, move her close to you and sit by her and open the door. If, because she is one legged, your friend would lift her to bring her out, consider trying that. Try to mimic your friend's behavior with her. It is very possible being close will help you both. Thinking of you.

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Hi. I have already moved Scarlet's cage close to my chair from where I watch TV or read, or just relax. She was nervous when I moved the cage, but after a while, I could see a difference, for the better. She started to move a bit toward me. Yes, my friend always lifted her out of the cage, for fear that she would fall. Is tomorrow too soon to try? I don't want to scare her but it is part of the prior routine she had. She is also eating more. Thank you very much for helping me. She is the sweetest bird.
I forgot to say that I sleep in the living room--so Scarlet is not alone at night.

Try reaching for her and watch her body language. If she welcomes your advance then hold her as your friend did ...perhaps with the things from your friend's place near you.She may need your touch sooner rather than later. But if she backs off when you reach give it some time. You sound very intuitive and I suspect you will find a way to comfort her whether she is ready for actual contact or needs more space

I would say since Scarlet already knows you there would probably be no harm in trying now, if she seems skittish or frightened then you can always try again in a few days

bogo1 said:

Try reaching for her and watch her body language. If she welcomes your advance then hold her as your friend did ...perhaps with the things from your friend's place near you.She may need your touch sooner rather than later. But if she backs off when you reach give it some time. You sound very intuitive and I suspect you will find a way to comfort her whether she is ready for actual contact or needs more space

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Thanks again. Right now, Scarlet is sleeping. When you say she may need my touch sooner, rather than later, a bell went off in my head. I'm going to try after, when she awakes.

Bobby34231 said:

I would say since Scarlet already knows you there would probably be no harm in trying now, if she seems skittish or frightened then you can always try again in a few days

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I'm going to try. Scarlet is so sweet and has been thru so much. I really appreciate folks being so nice and helping a new member and my new daughter. I will report on the results.

bluefeather said:

Bobby34231 said:

I would say since Scarlet already knows you there would probably be no harm in trying now, if she seems skittish or frightened then you can always try again in a few days

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I'm going to try. Scarlet is so sweet and has been thru so much. I really appreciate folks being so nice and helping a new member and my new daughter. I will report on the results.

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Hey that's what we're here for!!!

I am happy to report that my first try with Scarlet was a success. I can easily say that I was more nervous than she was. I slowly put my hand in her cage, while talking to her. She let me come near her and moved a bit closer. I was very worried about her missing foot, even tho I had seen my friend do it many times. Scarlet let me stroke her chest. I was just so excited because I could see she welcomed it. Then I gently put her in my hand. It's a little difficult to descibe, but I was able to put my hand around her and hold her so that I was stroking her with my thumb. I was so concerned about hurting her remaining foot, that I felt awkward. She just rested in my hand and I knew she felt loved. I thought it best not to take her out, today. That would really be a big step. So I put her down , standing up and stroked her again. After, I sat in my chair and she moved over toward me. For the first time, I believe she feels loved. This was a moment I will treasure. Tonight, I will just let her rest and tomorrow, see if I should take her out of the cage. WOW! How wonderful. Thanks to all for your help. I've been leaving her cover at night, half open, so she can see me. Is this OK
My new daughter and I are bonding

I can honestly say that you and scarlet have made my day. I had a rare Tuesday off work and had the forum up on my home office computer to force myself to not look at my work email. So I was following a number of threads. But you two have been in my mind all day. I work around grief all the time and the emotional survivors of trauma are usually those who find something (sometimes great sometimes small) that they can control and connect to. You have done that with Scarlet and given your friend a great service. You could not prevent her loss but with your compassion and intuition you have relieved her pets distress. It was an honor to share a corner of your effort today.

It would depend on how much activity there is in the living room after she goes to bed whether or not to fully cover her, if the lights are on or the TV is on it would be best to cover her fully, birds need a good 12hrs + of peaceful uninteruped sleep, otherwise you may have a cranky little bird to contend with, just a suggestion, but I know I see the difference in my guys if I keep them up to late and they don't get their beauty sleep

Bobby is correct. I would cover. Speak softly occasionally. She knows you are there.