I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forensics)

I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forensics)

I like to listen to people talk about their passions and life, and sometimes people chew my ear off! I do not disrespect or interrupt. But I feel like no one cares about mine �� It makes me sad. I bore people. I can hear them not paying attention, even when I don't talk about it for long at all.

I just have passion for forensics (I'm in grad school for it) and birds and people think I'm weird when I talk about homicides and crime, or my love for my birds.

I work so hard doing both. I have burned myself out for years of no social life getting into graduate school for forensics, and eventually I will go for my Ph.D. People are proud of me but don't seem to care for my details. But it's not nearly as bad as my talk about birds. I feel proud to train my birds; I put so much time and effort and the small accomplishments excite me..But only me. Even if I say 3 sentences about what I accomplished today with taming my purely wild never held birds. I feel good for 5 minutes of success after hours of trying. People don't listen, seem to care, or understand my bond with them and love for them.

I feel depressed. It hurts quite a bit.

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

It is true that a lot of people don't care, and it is frustrating. I just try to remember that their opinions don't Impact my love for my birds. I also find that people like to meet the birds better than hear about them, and once they actually meet them they are much more interested

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

Well, we on this forum LOVE to hear about birds, so just "spam" us with your stories. I am also interested in forensics, I find it an interesting subject.

I usually tell my pets about how wonderful and clever they are, they listen to me and they agree with every word I say (especially if I'm handing out treats). Works for us.

Seriously, it can be difficult when others don't share interests, but it's not difficult to hold a conversation about something you aren't interested in or know anything about. It's just good manners. All we can do when confronted with poor manners is to maintain our own.

Maybe you could look into some real-life clubs to join? Members have that common interest and can freely discuss their main interests with like-minded people.

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

Sometimes it can be the way you say your piece that causes the problem. One of my kids has a leetle problem with that. When she's had a good time, she wants to recreate the entire scenario for you so you can enjoy it too. This can lead to some long and bo-oo-oring monologues from her where a short descriptive passage would have told a nice story. She likes to relate, verbatim, every syllable contained in every conversation so that I can enjoy the whole by-play with her. We are working on the art of abbreviation and on Finding the Key Points...

My other child is autistic and will bounce up and begin speaking to me in depth about one or more of his passions, whether I'm deep in financial management issues, focussing on a war-game or weeping copious tears over a sad movie. He has no clue as to whether I am in the right frame of mind to be spoken to in depth about his interest. It makes for some very interesting parenting. LOLOL!

I don't know if any of this applies to you, but I post it in case it might be of help. During my teacher training, we discussed at length what makes an interesting conversation and all agreed that many people never really learn how to converse well. We left that class with the motto: 'Brevity is the soul of wit'.

Having said that, though, I find it hard to believe anyone could not be rivetted by the topic of forensic science! Do feel free to share stories here (in the 'Off Topic' section, of course).

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

Oh Valerie! I think forensics is an extremely interesting field of study! I just love watching those real life murder and crime shows on the ID channel.

I also think it's extremely admirable that you're going to graduate school for it Good for you!

I'm one person who finds you interesting Hold your head up girl... You'll meet so many more people during your lifetime who DO understand just what you're talking about, and one day you'll look back and realize it really doesn't matter. I know it's painful now. Have you made any friends in class who might share some same interests?

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

I know what you mean, when I try to tell my friends the latest stuff about Connie I can feel the conversation shut down.
But there's more bird people out there than you think! I talk about my bird all the time to anyone, whether they care or not lol and every so often I meet someone who also has a bird..
Also thats awesome to hear that you're in graduate school, I am planning on doing that too so its really nice to hear that you're able to manage having a bird at the same time.. I was worried about what I'd do, even though it's a ways away..
I think the best way to meet really good friends is through your passions, so talk about that stuff as much as you want, and you'll find the right people.
But also talk about it with the people you already know, even if they aren't that interested, the more you tell them the more involved they will feel and they might start to be more interested in getting an update on that stuff.
I went home for the weekend recently to visit my parents and they had to sit and listen for a half hour while I showed them an assortment of Connie's feathers from her first moult lol

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

LOL! While I'm still in the spirit of self-revelation, spare a though for my good self. My double major at University was Botany/Zoology. A lot of my conversation, therefore, centred on the most recent pot-trial (not that kind of pot!) I was growing or the most recent anatomy dissection we had done. That's how I found out two things: i) most people aren't interested in the details of how grass grows (not that kind of grass!) and ii) most people tend to lose their lunch if you describe the removal and investigation of a kidney while they're eating.

Life's Lessons, see?

When I met my husband (at work), he and his friend had a running 'thing' about Monty Python's Flying Circus. I never, never got the chance to enjoy that because I spent years having it quoted at me across my cubicle. If I hear the Parrot Sketch just one more time, I may have to kill someone!!!!

Lots of us get it wrong - I wouldn't worry too much if I were you.

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

Well, that's what the parrot forums are for... because let's face it, most folks don't get the parrot thing, and look at you cross-eyed if you go on and on about your birds - unless it's another bird person. Then we can talk about them all day.

Forensics I have to do for a living, so I don't want to talk about work outside the office either! That would get old fast for me, too, sorry.

Hey, try bringing up skydiving outside the drop zone. That's a double whammy, not only are you boring me with stuff I don't care about - but you are also obviously a complete nut job- GO AWAY! (Yeah, it happens... )

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

Betrisher said:

If I hear the Parrot Sketch just one more time, I may have to kill someone!!!!

Click to expand...

This parrot is dead! sorry....

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

I LOVED Monty Python growing up... and Faulty Towers after that.

Faulty Towers was some seriously funny stuff...

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

I know what you mean about people thinking you are crazy (though perhaps they think me less severely impaired as I don't risk my life jumping out of planes, that is my husband's job lol) you should SEE the looks I get!

Stranger: so how many kids do you have?
Me: we actually don't have children
Stranger: (something patronizing about how my time will come) oh, well do you have pets?
Me: yes, we have a dog, cat, fish, and birds.
Stranger: oh what kind of bird do you have?
Me: pionus, Indian ringnecks, green cheeked conures, cockatiels, and budgies.
Stranger: wow, five birds! Your house must be so loud!
Me: actually I live with 23 birds, and my house is only loud at sunrise.
Stranger: TWENTY THREE BIRDS!?!?!?!
*conversation ends awkwardly as they think about how nasty my house MUST be with that many pets and how socially awkward I must be to need that many animals, how I am probably a hoarder and how they should really probably report me to the humane society but perhaps my housing office will figure it out on their own since clearly my house is being destroyed*

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

I have found that my non bird friends eyes start to glaze over when I run on about my birds, but luckily I have the forum as well as friends from the bird club who are as crazy about birds as I am! It is a drastic difference in reaction when my non bird friends ask how many birds I have, versus bird people asking. We are at 77 birds now..lol.
Is it sad that I remember most of my friends birds names, but have trouble with people's kids names?

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

LOL silversage... That's kinda how I feel when people ask what kind of pets I have.

It wasn't until yesterday when I was sitting next to a lady with her timneh (at the A vet) that I didn't feel crazy when I listed off all of my "kids" lol

4 cats
3 large dogs, 1 small
4 birds
1 horse
....[emoji445] and a partridge in a pear tree! [emoji445] (jk)

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

SilverSage said:

I know what you mean about people thinking you are crazy (though perhaps they think me less severely impaired as I don't risk my life jumping out of planes, that is my husband's job lol) you should SEE the looks I get!

Me: actually I live with 23 birds, and my house is only loud at sunrise.
Stranger: TWENTY THREE BIRDS!?!?!?!
*conversation ends awkwardly as they think about how nasty my house MUST be with that many pets and how socially awkward I must be to need that many animals, how I am probably a hoarder and how they should really probably report me to the humane society but perhaps my housing office will figure it out on their own since clearly my house is being destroyed*

Click to expand...

Here's a suggestion:

Me: Actually, I have a small parrot aviary - 23 little birds.

Now they picture something like a lori flight at the zoo, and you seem like less of a freak. One novelty thing you don't get to see everyday, many folks secretly (actually pay money to) enjoy...

Now you're no longer a horder. You're just different...

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

RainbowRose said:

I like to listen to people talk about their passions and life, and sometimes people chew my ear off! I do not disrespect or interrupt. But I feel like no one cares about mine �� It makes me sad. I bore people. I can hear them not paying attention, even when I don't talk about it for long at all.

I just have passion for forensics (I'm in grad school for it) and birds and people think I'm weird when I talk about homicides and crime, or my love for my birds.

I work so hard doing both. I have burned myself out for years of no social life getting into graduate school for forensics, and eventually I will go for my Ph.D. People are proud of me but don't seem to care for my details. But it's not nearly as bad as my talk about birds. I feel proud to train my birds; I put so much time and effort and the small accomplishments excite me..But only me. Even if I say 3 sentences about what I accomplished today with taming my purely wild never held birds. I feel good for 5 minutes of success after hours of trying. People don't listen, seem to care, or understand my bond with them and love for them.

I feel depressed. It hurts quite a bit.

Click to expand...

I enjoy learning of other's job functions and passions and appreciate when they reciprocate. While my professional life fosters great discussion, my avian passions rapidly cause eyes to glaze over! Most folks will casually thumb through my iPhone photo collection and hand it back within 2 minutes or less!

Might it foster discussion to relate your forensics background to iconic pop-culture shows such as CSI and Law and Order or to showcase how forensics has bettered our society? That they may distort or oversimplify forensic research may be a springboard to further conversation.

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

I love computers and healthcare but limit my conversation because people glaze over, or hear the teacher from Peanuts/Charlie Brown (wash wah wah hwaaaaa wah wah wah). Husband loves football and I purposely glaze over and tell him I'm not listening, lol. To talk bird I come here because my friends and family just don't understand and glaze over. I personally think forensics is facinating but no one in my family cares to hear that, my mother will literally pass out talking about or seeing bodies, wounds, blood, etc.

So my family doesn't understand my job and they don't ask because they think it's boring. If I get stuck with someone and conversation, I switch to the weather, or turn the topic on others like do you have kids, people love to talk about their kids, or pets and it opens new ground for conversation. Don't fret, listen and learn what the other person likes and you can work in forensics but you might have to keep it G rated, lol!!!!

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

Of all of the applied sciences, I would have thought Forensics to be one of the most interesting!

Not exactly the same as your field of expertise, but when looking into the history of this property, I work on unravelling tiny scraps of knowledge(and old structures, posts etc) to piece together the early days.
From this, we have turned a number of ideas about life here in the 1870's,1880's and 1890's, upside down.

Also, I have always been interested in what motivates people to act the way they do. Especially; when people change their attitude towards a particular topic. What motivates that change.
Perhaps forensic psychology[??]?

Piecing together tiny scraps of information, and applying known rules to how they occurred, to build the complete story is (in my opinion) REALLY interesting.


A Birdy AND [Somewhat] forensics story for you:

We have a 40+ band of Apostlebirds [Struthidea cinerea] living here at our homestead. They seem to be in charge of our local security[we weren't consulted on this...], and are quick to respond to any daylight incursions by large goannas, snakes and cats. Many a bitey snake has fallen to the Shovel of Destiny(tm), and many a feral cat has found their lives cut short, after the security detail located them, and 'encouraged' me to get my fat backside along to resolve the situation. I find it ironic that all the screeching goes quiet when I am actually engaged in battle with the snake, and I would swear I hear a little voice placing $5 on the bet that I will be the losing side this time around...

Due to their EXTREMELY gregarious and sometimes bizarre behaviour, they are a surprisingly entertaining bird to have around. Their 'larger than life' attitudes make up for the drab grey plumage. Picture an angry finch, give him a dark grey paint-job, upscale by about 10, and you pretty much have an Apostlebird.

We call them "Harry and the Lads". They love screeching, chortling, scamming food from the chicken feeder, more screeching at things, fighting things, fighting each other, playing with rope, more chortling, and scaring the crap out of each other.
Now, I am sure there are at least 50% of them are female, but it's nigh impossible to tell them apart, and so we just call them all Harry. Given I have seen some of them chat up male Crested pigeons, I'm not exactly sure if they know themselves...

Some 8 years ago, we started having some of the Harry's become listless and over the space of a day or so, would fall out of their tree, and die. We only noticed after finding a couple of the expired Harry's around the garden. This started some alarm bells ringing, as we wondered if the Harry's had gained access to a chemical in one of the many sheds, and were poisoning themselves. A search of all of the sheds known to have any sort of potentially dangerous chemical, found no such trace, but the Harry's continued to lose the occasional clan member.
After we reached 6 dead Harry's, and still no obvious causes to the poisoning, we contacted the local Dept of Primary Industries. They advised us to nab a couple of obviously ill Harry's , and they would euthanize them, and perform an autopsy.
My overseer Dan braved the wrath of the rest of the Harry clan, and placed 2 of the unwell in a box. Much indignant screeching, and Dan also sported a few strafing runs to the scalp by the time he had them boxed up.
NO-ONE MESSES WITH THE HARRY CLAN!!

So, the deed was done, the birds autopsied, and we had a rather bemused phonecall from the DPI vet.
DEFINATELY no poisoning occurring in the Harry clan.

Turns out we were also enjoying a Carab beetle plague at the time.

Carab beetles are bright iridescent green, are about an inch long, and carry enough chemical weapons to make your average terrorist rather jealous..
They are insectivores, and attracted to lights at night, which makes summer evenings rather interesting...The rest of us try to avoid these beetles when they plague, but not the Harry clan. They don't mind the Harry version of a good strong Curry!!
It seems that Harry and the clan were enjoying eating Carab Beetles by the dozen. The hard carapaces were locking together in the Harry stomach, and they were dying of indigestion!

Thankfully, the Carab beetles finished the plague, the Harry clan got busy in their 6 permanent nests around the homestead yard, and we were back to a full complement of the HarryCo security team inside 2 months....

As I type this, I can hear an extended discussion by the Harry clan; something about the world in general, how it seems a tad warm today, How Harry down the end there seems a bit odd and might need a good kicking, and whether it's time to raid the chicken feeder for the 2:15pm snack...

There are bound to be more stories about Harry and the Lads in the future..

I seem to have digressed from the topic somewhat...

I don't find birds and/or forensics to be dull or uninteresting. There seems to be a number of people here whom also feel the same way. I'd expect that if you want to share your stories with the people here, they will be very interested.

Cheers,

Rod.

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

Thank you everyone, I feel better now lol, it just sucks sometimes but I will just continue to love my birds and birds in general and accept the fact that not everyone is as bird crazy lol and yea true, that's what this forum is for!

Re: I listen to ppl talk about their passions. no one cares about mine(birds & forens

What a delightful story!!

RainbowRose, I am glad you feel better, and I am VERY glad for this community. For the first time I actually live in a place with real live bird friends, and even here people's eyes often glass over when they hear about my pets. I just quietly remember how my own eyes used to glass over when people would talk to me about sports or marching band or the other things many of my friends were so into, and try to remember that each of us likes things others do not. I secretly feel that my love of birds is a bit more sophisticated than the love of sports, but I suspect that is just my way of trying to make myself feel better for not being athletic. at all.