Funny things you did as a kid or things your kid did.

gracebowen

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My son is sleeping on the floor in my room and he just sat up and said "I cant take it anymore"
I said "take what"

Him "the crowd"
Me " what crowd do you mean the birds.

He said no the people.
Now I realize he is talking in his sleep so I told the people to leave.
He thanked me and laid back down.


When I was a kid my mom came home from working a double. Before going to bed she asked me to wash the potatoes so she could cook dinner after her nap.

After she was asleep I realized I didnt know how to wash potatoes. I decided to let her sleep and figure it out on my own. I decided that it must be the same as washing dishes.

Fortunately mom woke up and came into the kitchen just as I was finishing and noone ate them.
 

MyFlock

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Sing Kenny Rogers song as 500 children and a crop in the field instead of 5 children and a crop in the field or something like that.

Apparently, I said a lot of funny things as a kid as the adults were always laughing at the things I could come up with!

My uncle used to predict I'd grow up to be an attorney because I was very good at convincing arguments in order to get the things I wanted to have :eek:. No, I didn't grow up to be an attorney! Haha!
 

Dinosrawr

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Oh my goodness, I would've laughed so hard at your son! And thank god your mom realized before everyone ate them... I can't imagine soapy spuds being very delicious.

As for myself... I'm not tall, nor have I ever been. Growing up I was always the short kid who couldn't reach anything and who was too small to fit anything properly. One day I was incredibly excited because I was measured at school and was 4'11". While getting ready with my father to leave for hockey practice, I thought it was important to exclaim my excitement of height, but 4'11" didn't seem like much of an accomplishment. So instead, I happily belted out, "Dad! Dad! I'm almost five feet tall!"

To which he replied, "Oh? And just how tall are you?"

I was so thrilled I proudly chirped, "I'm four foot twelve!"

It's been nearly 14 years since that happened, and every year my family replays it when I visit (I'm the only short person in the family, of course).

I also completely destroyed my parents' bedroom and all objects within it with green permanent marker. I'm terrified to have children and see what they turn out like! [emoji33]
 

Aquila

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Oh my goodness, I would've laughed so hard at your son! And thank god your mom realized before everyone ate them... I can't imagine soapy spuds being very delicious.

As for myself... I'm not tall, nor have I ever been. Growing up I was always the short kid who couldn't reach anything and who was too small to fit anything properly. One day I was incredibly excited because I was measured at school and was 4'11". While getting ready with my father to leave for hockey practice, I thought it was important to exclaim my excitement of height, but 4'11" didn't seem like much of an accomplishment. So instead, I happily belted out, "Dad! Dad! I'm almost five feet tall!"

To which he replied, "Oh? And just how tall are you?"

I was so thrilled I proudly chirped, "I'm four foot twelve!"

It's been nearly 14 years since that happened, and every year my family replays it when I visit (I'm the only short person in the family, of course).

I also completely destroyed my parents' bedroom and all objects within it with green permanent marker. I'm terrified to have children and see what they turn out like! [emoji33]

The funny thing about being short or tall is it's all relative. :p

Growing up I was almost always the tallest girl, till around my freshman or sophomore year in high school.

But on my dad's side of the family, I'm one of the shortest women. Besides my grandmother, my father's sisters are both over 6 feet tall. Other women on that side are also abnormally tall (the men too.)
 

Christinenc2000

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My son was about 4 years old. We always lived in the country. First big trip we took with him we had to drive thru a large city. He was so excited looking at large smoke stacks yelling LOOK MOM A CLOUD MAKER.
 

ToMang07

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One of my brothers is a chronic nighttime "sleep-talker" and we've had some really funny ones. I'll just post my favorite 3:

First, one night we had watched "The Princess Bride" he had been allowed to stay up late (past his bed time) to watch it. I went to bed an hour or 2 later, I don't think I had a bed time at that point. (Or I just didn't follow it, lol) ANywho, I go into our room to go to bed, and he sits up, opens his eyes ane looks at me, and YELLS:

"DON'T MARRY THE PRINCESS! DON'T MARRY THE PRINCESS!!!!"

Second, similar situation we were camping, and he had gone to bed earlier. I was opening up the tent to go to bed for the night, and again, he sits up, looks at me and yells: "BEETLES! BEETLES IN THE TENT! YOU DON'T WANT BEETLES IN THE TENT, DO YOU? BEETLES ARE BAD!"

Lastly, my personal favorite, we were sleeping in the living room on the pull out couch because our room in the basement was being renovated. (Living room was adjacent to the kitchen, no walls or anything, on the second floor.) So I wake up, and I can see he's in the fridge, I hear liquid pouring, so I ask him to pour me a cup too, and get up to go get it.

Well, I get to the fridge, and he's peeing. Into the fridge. On everything.

I grab him by the shoulder, turn him and yell "WHAT ARE YOU DOING???"

He stops, looks at me, and goes into the living room and picks up the cat.At this point... I don't know what to do.... I'm just dumbfounded. I'm about to go get mom and dad, when he opens the door, walks out onto the porch (still holding the cat) and THROWS THE CAT OFF THE 2nd FLOOR PORCH.

"WHY THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT????"

"He was plotting to kill us!"

At which point he got back into bed, and went back to sleep.

Can't make this crap up, lol
 

ruffledfeathers

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haha, I am a sleep talker when I am extremely stressed and/or overtired/sleep deprived. My friends say it is hilarious. I was mid conversation with a boyfriend, complaining about a manager at my old job and went on to tell him how the manager made people collate and stuff monsters in envelopes for a large mailing. MONSTERS?
I also was talking to my friend about her finches and said 'in the morning I think I will get up early and walk them on the boulevard to wear down their nails.' (like they are large dogs). In my sitting up, apparently awake but actually sleeping state, it must look so funny to my friends.
 

Aquila

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haha, I am a sleep talker when I am extremely stressed and/or overtired/sleep deprived. My friends say it is hilarious. I was mid conversation with a boyfriend, complaining about a manager at my old job and went on to tell him how the manager made people collate and stuff monsters in envelopes for a large mailing. MONSTERS?
I also was talking to my friend about her finches and said 'in the morning I think I will get up early and walk them on the boulevard to wear down their nails.' (like they are large dogs). In my sitting up, apparently awake but actually sleeping state, it must look so funny to my friends.

I don't know if it's due to my health issues or the medicine I'm taking lately but I've been having full on conversations when I've been "alert" but not really awake. Normal conversations, that I have no memory of later on. I went so far to tell my boyfriend to make me sit up and tell him that I'm awake, but even then I'm still asleep doing it!

I'm just glad I don't have any deep dark secrets or information that I might give away in my asleep state! I think I'd make a horrible FBI agent!
 

Scott

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A lot of my "funny things" I did as a kid pertained to food. I recall around age 6 climbing on a chair to stand on the stove to reach to the cupboard that contained sweets! Got caught once in the early AM by my stepfather who was not amused. I screamed "mommy!" as he gently placed me on the floor. We didn't have a lot of sugary sodas, but my trick was to fill a glass and replace the missing quantity with water so I wouldn't get caught. Riiiiiiiight! Hated the white part of hard-boiled eggs for breakfast, so I'd peel it off and secretly feed it to our dog Micky.
 

Birdman666

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Sep 18, 2013
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Presently have six Greenwing Macaw (17 yo), Red Fronted Macaw (12 yo), Red Lored Amazon (17 y.o.), Lilac Crowned Amazon (about 43 y.o.) and a Congo African Grey (11 y.o.)
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I had no sense of humor as a child... :p (Either that, or I'm taking the FIFTH. I said TAKING... not DRINKING.)

The funniest story I remember was my daughter's big Young Eagles event.
Young Eagles is an EAA organization that exposes kids, who would otherwise never get a chance to fly, to general aviation. This was the yearly huge "Fly in" deal where pilots from all over California gave underprivileged kids an introductory flight lesson/experience... (My daughter was 12 at the time. She'd already been flying for about a year.)

Sarah was very active in Young Eagles at the time, and worked the event... registering people, and, oh, by the way, taking the opportunity to flying a few planes herself, (like the Stearman Biplane that day)... ONE OF THE PLANES WAS A RATAN CANARD... (i.e. elevators in the front, wings in the rear.) which she desperately wanted to fly (so did I by the way), and she waited about two hours, to get her slot in that plane...

So she preflights the plane with the pilot, and gets in, and they take off, and the pilot promised to give her a few "special privileges." Technically he wasn't doing aerobatics (that would be wrong, and irresponsible), he was demonstrating to an experienced Young Eagle that Canards don't stall in any flight attitude (it was a teaching moment, my daughter was learning priniciples of advanced applied physics. It was EDUCATIONAL! Yeah. Right. They were playing. Needless to say, she's over the moon excited!) Well, she's off, and I lose sight of the plane, and go back to working the booth.

Now one of my skydiving buddies runs that chapter of Young Eagles, and that's how I got Sarah super involved in it. So, we're working the booth when suddenly we get a call over the walkie talkie... one of the Young Eagles planes has had a problem, and has made a crash landing, and is off the runway... MY BUDDIE'S FACE TURNED WHITE... WE'RE GONNA GET SUED! WHAT DO I TELL THE PARENTS.... WHO IS IT? WAS ANYONE HURT... NO ONE KNOWS ANYTHING OTHER THAN THERE IS A CLOUD OF DUST ON THE RUNWAY, AND A FIRE TRUCK HAS BEEN DISPATCHED BY THE TOWER...

Yeah. Tense.

So, we suspend operations and go running over there. The walkie talkie kicks in... GUESS WHICH PLANE IT IS?! IT'S THE CANARD...

"Who's the Young Eagle on board?" was my buddies next question on the walkie talkie.

I already knew the answer to that one. "MY DAUGHTER!"

"Your daughter?! Oh, thank god! I mean... I'm sure she's fine... but Thank God it's someone like her that isn't going to be freaked out, with freaked out parents..." (I was worried, but not freaked out. But I knew what he meant.)

About ten minutes goes by, AND GUESS WHO SHOWS UP SITTING IN THE FRONT SEAT OF THE FIRE TRUCK, HUGE GRIN ON HER FACE, PLAYING WITH THE SIREN?!

FIRST WORDS OUT OF HER MOUTH "DAD, I GOT TO FLY THE CANARD AND RIDE IN A FIRE TRUCK!"

As it turns out, they just popped a nose gear tire, and that caused them to ground loop off the runway. Nothing more serious than a blown tire, and an aircraft tow.

This is the same child, that I had to FORCE to learn to drive a car.

Go figure!
 
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Birdman666

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Presently have six Greenwing Macaw (17 yo), Red Fronted Macaw (12 yo), Red Lored Amazon (17 y.o.), Lilac Crowned Amazon (about 43 y.o.) and a Congo African Grey (11 y.o.)
Panama Amazon (1 Y.O.)
i don't know if it's due to my health issues or the medicine i'm taking lately but i've been having full on conversations when i've been "alert" but not really awake. Normal conversations, that i have no memory of later on.

that's me every single morning before coffee...

Although i do more pointing and grunting than conversing...
 

Aquila

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i don't know if it's due to my health issues or the medicine i'm taking lately but i've been having full on conversations when i've been "alert" but not really awake. Normal conversations, that i have no memory of later on.

that's me every single morning before coffee...

Although i do more pointing and grunting than conversing...

Oh yeah, that's me too. I've trained my boyfriend to get me coffee if he needs to wake me up for any reason. Otherwise he'll go in the computer room and wait for me to wake up. :D

My parents never caught on to that, my dad insists on calling me at 7am, and trying to have a full conversation with me. I've told him, when have I ever been up at 7am by choice!? I understand you get up at 5, but you go to bed at 8pm! He's not even that old! Though when I stayed with him down the shore last year, and I told my aunts to wake me up, my dad yelled at them to not bother me while I was sleeping. WHY DO YOU THINK YOU'RE EXEMPT FROM THAT, DAD?

My mom's been staying with me temporarily, and even though her and I are very similar (total night owls) please, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD don't wake me up when I've finally fallen asleep! I love my parents but I need my darn beauty rest!

Now, I normally live alone (if you're not counting the birds) but this is the sign I have on my bedroom door, which is closed when I'm asleep.
ocDg54s.jpg


I think I've even conditioned my birds to stay quiet until they smell coffee brewing. Once it's brewing all bets are off though, even with blackout curtains.

This is how you wake me up.
BhlitRP.jpg


This is how I am when I'm woken up otherwise.
OJH7vQ6.jpg
 

Birdman666

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Presently have six Greenwing Macaw (17 yo), Red Fronted Macaw (12 yo), Red Lored Amazon (17 y.o.), Lilac Crowned Amazon (about 43 y.o.) and a Congo African Grey (11 y.o.)
Panama Amazon (1 Y.O.)
Hate to say this but by 7:00 a.m. I've got to be on the road, to make it to work by 8:00 a.m.

I'm up at 5:30 a.m. every morning... DISCOMBOBULATED... but up.
 

Aquila

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Hate to say this but by 7:00 a.m. I've got to be on the road, to make it to work by 8:00 a.m.

I'm up at 5:30 a.m. every morning... DISCOMBOBULATED... but up.
Unemployed since May, so, sorry not sorry. :p

Though when I DO find another job, well, I don't know how pleasant I'll be until I get back on a schedule! Somehow I still manage to get up to feed the birds and let everybody out though, before I lay down for a mid morning nap. :D
 

ToMang07

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Hate to say this but by 7:00 a.m. I've got to be on the road, to make it to work by 8:00 a.m.

I'm up at 5:30 a.m. every morning... DISCOMBOBULATED... but up.

I work 9am-9:09pm on a rotating schedule, so I get up between 6:30-7:30am, depending on what needs to be done in the morning, and out the door by 8:10. Of course I never go to bed before midnight, and I generally sleep until 8-9am naturally.
 

Terry57

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I was in WVA visiting my family, and was babysitting my 4 year old grandson. We were in the living room, and hear this loud, clomping sound. In walks Chris, in my ex's cowboy boots (which came up waaay past his knees) and he starts singing," I've been working on the railroad".
It was hysterical.

Still laughing at the earlier peeing in the fridge story.
 

RavensGryf

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I can completely relate about NEEDING coffee. I once had a doctor tell me "no coffee" and I thought well that's a complete impossibility if I need to do anything which requires more than semi-consciousness throughout the day, and I mean that literally! I've always naturally been a night person and never a morning person even as a kid. Even when I'd had a long term schedule which required me to get up very early, I was never able to get used to it. It was painful every single day.
 
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gracebowen

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  • Thread Starter
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One time when he was around 4 my son asked me to have a baby for him and make sure its a boy.

And one more. Same age. I had to hide my tampons. I kept finding them open unused all over the bathroom floor. One day I walked in to find my son popping them all.

Me: son what are you doing

Son: playing with the white dynamite.


Ive enjoyed reading everyone's stories.
 

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