I have made a mistake and need help to fix it!

Hey everyone,
so we got our african grey when he was 3 months old me and my dad raised him but we had no big knowledge in birds and stuff i was trying to make him stand on my hand and that he was just so awesome he did it and kept with it, but the problem is here, with time i got bored and stopped playing with him and my father only changes his food and stuff he doesnt even let him out the cage and feeds him only his food (no veggies or anything) (i wanna know if thats bad too) so i was just talking with him and petting him sometimes but with time now hes like 2 years old i wanted to start to train him and i read that he needs a treat when he does something right but he just doesnt eat anything other than his food, i tried many times but nope idk what im going to do, and now hes being aggressive whenever i put my hand in front of him and bitten me sometimes, and runs away he never wants to be lift by me anymore and whenever i open the cage he doesnt go in and gets very aggressive and runs away from me when i try to get him inside, i believe this is all my fault and i am responsible for this and i really want to fix it but idk how, since everytime i let him out he hates me more like last time i let him out for 4 hours and i needed to go out so i tried to let him inside the cage but he didnt and bited me alot of times until i force him on my hand so please help me guys i really want to let him be healthy and have fun with me but i just dont know how

Hi, You need to start right back at base level in the hope that you can win back that trust.

Put yourself in his shoes how would you feel. This will give you some understanding how things are and it will not change overnight. You need to be in this for the long haul and if it works make a promise to stay. If you succeed and win his trust back you wont be given another shot if you fail him again.

http://www.parrotforums.com/general-parrot-information/49144-tips-bonding-building-trust.html

Please feel free to have a good read through this section on diet http://www.parrotforums.com/parrot-food-recipes-diet/

Also this http://www.parrotforums.com/congo-timneh-greys/

Wishing you luck, it may seem daunting at times but the end result is so worth it.

Icnatslpel said:

Hey everyone,
so we got our african grey when he was 3 months old me and my dad raised him but we had no big knowledge in birds and stuff i was trying to make him stand on my hand and that he was just so awesome he did it and kept with it, but the problem is here, with time i got bored and stopped playing with him and my father only changes his food and stuff he doesnt even let him out the cage and feeds him only his food (no veggies or anything) (i wanna know if thats bad too) so i was just talking with him and petting him sometimes but with time now hes like 2 years old i wanted to start to train him and i read that he needs a treat when he does something right but he just doesnt eat anything other than his food, i tried many times but nope idk what im going to do, and now hes being aggressive whenever i put my hand in front of him and bitten me sometimes, and runs away he never wants to be lift by me anymore and whenever i open the cage he doesnt go in and gets very aggressive and runs away from me when i try to get him inside, i believe this is all my fault and i am responsible for this and i really want to fix it but idk how, since everytime i let him out he hates me more like last time i let him out for 4 hours and i needed to go out so i tried to let him inside the cage but he didnt and bited me alot of times until i force him on my hand so please help me guys i really want to let him be healthy and have fun with me but i just dont know how

Click to expand...

Find his favorite treat and get too work greys are very stubborn too begin with.

plumsmum2005 said:

Hi, You need to start right back at base level in the hope that you can win back that trust.

Put yourself in his shoes how would you feel. This will give you some understanding how things are and it will not change overnight. You need to be in this for the long haul and if it works make a promise to stay. If you succeed and win his trust back you wont be given another shot if you fail him again.

http://www.parrotforums.com/general-parrot-information/49144-tips-bonding-building-trust.html

Please feel free to have a good read through this section on diet Parrot Food, Recipes and Diet - Parrot Forum - Parrot Owner's Community

Also this Congo & Timneh Greys - Parrot Forum - Parrot Owner's Community

Wishing you luck, it may seem daunting at times but the end result is so worth it.

Click to expand...

Hey there, tysm for your reply and I have read that article but im still unsure of some stuff so i am going to ask here so i dont make mistakes again,
About the bird diet I read in that thread that he offered the bird like 5 foods and the bird picked one, but if i do that to my bird he will just eat his normal one, so can i remove his food and put some types of food like carrots apples.. and see if he eats? cuz im scared that he wont eat and starve.


and about the clicker training im having the exact opposite thing whenever i open the cage the parrot runs to go outside so fast and isnt scared of me since he lets me pet him but whenever i put my hand so he goes up on it when i want him to get back to the cage he freaks out and i get no choice at the end just to force him in which is i hate, but im forced to do it since he will make a mess in the house with pooping and hitting stuff. and his cage btw has some toys and its large and he can climb and play in it more than outside. im sorry im asking alot of questions but do you have any idea how to deal with that?
btw im ready for the new start and i will keep going on but i have a question that i still go to school so is playing with him like 1-3 hrs a day on schooldays enough?

Please anyone help me with those questions cuz without knowing I cant start

In the absence of any grey parronts I would just work through the Building trust tips to start with. Tiny steps. If you just sit by his cage and do homework, read etc and talk to him, offer a treat now and again. When he comes out use the treat to go back in and you could try a dowel perch rather than your hand. Your movements need to be slow and sure and not rushed, offer him verbal confidence, 'it's ok', 'good boy' all soothing phrases.

Bit confused as to which threads you were referring to? If you post links and break your questions down that may help in providing clarity?

I had to read this a few times because it seems like there is a lot going on.

Ok 1) he likes to be out of his cage
ok
2) he doesn't like bing put back....kind of been there sometimes my bird doesn't like to get off me so I figured something out that might help as an exercise...sometimes he poops on me so I wanna change my shirt. If I have a shirt in my hand he's learned that I'm just taking him off me for a minute as I chang shirts, it's easier than him trying to circumvent and basically use ninja skills to stay on me so he will get on my hand and sit in front of me while I change shirts. This is a good first step exercise....it's a predefined time limit and set of rules, he gets off, he see's me change shirts, he gets back on.

All training is little trials... you put him on the cage, you pick up a feather off the floor, you pick him back up. Set little tasks....something he can see over and over again...eventually something he hates is just, oh, ok, you have to pick out a book or whatever, I'm waiting.....


For biting, put him on the floor and make him walk back to you, that is time out. He'll figure it out pretty quick that biting equals being shunned and he will stop. Just be consistent.

I don't know anything about clicker training I just make kissy noises and he comes to me.

And food....don't worry about it, you get the trust thing going he'll be more into whatever.

clark_conure said:

I had to read this a few times because it seems like there is a lot going on.

Ok 1) he likes to be out of his cage
ok
2) he doesn't like bing put back....kind of been there sometimes my bird doesn't like to get off me so I figured something out that might help as an exercise...sometimes he poops on me so I wanna change my shirt. If I have a shirt in my hand he's learned that I'm just taking him off me for a minute as I chang shirts, it's easier than him trying to circumvent and basically use ninja skills to stay on me so he will get on my hand and sit in front of me while I change shirts. This is a good first step exercise....it's a predefined time limit and set of rules, he gets off, he see's me change shirts, he gets back on.

All training is little trials... you put him on the cage, you pick up a feather off the floor, you pick him back up. Set little tasks....something he can see over and over again...eventually something he hates is just, oh, ok, you have to pick out a book or whatever, I'm waiting.....


For biting, put him on the floor and make him walk back to you, that is time out. He'll figure it out pretty quick that biting equals being shunned and he will stop. Just be consistent.

I don't know anything about clicker training I just make kissy noises and he comes to me.

And food....don't worry about it, you get the trust thing going he'll be more into whatever.

Click to expand...

Hey thanks so much of your help but theres something I forgot to say that he doesnt like to be held by me, for example if i open the cage he doesnt go on my arm and when i remove my arm he runs to the door and stays outside if i try to put my hand infront of him he bites and doesnt go on it, if i let him down the floor he will just keep walking in the house and stay away from me, but when i pet him its okay he likes it and doesnt bite and get scared, and for food what did u mean i didnt understand sorry like is it ok to take off his food and put things like carrots apples grapes... for a day?
im sorry that im asking many question and i really thank you guys for helping me out with my parrot

plumsmum2005 said:

In the absence of any grey parronts I would just work through the Building trust tips to start with. Tiny steps. If you just sit by his cage and do homework, read etc and talk to him, offer a treat now and again. When he comes out use the treat to go back in and you could try a dowel perch rather than your hand. Your movements need to be slow and sure and not rushed, offer him verbal confidence, 'it's ok', 'good boy' all soothing phrases.

Bit confused as to which threads you were referring to? If you post links and break your questions down that may help in providing clarity?

Click to expand...

Tysm for your reply, yeah im sorry about that but i need a way to find my parrot treat since he ONLY eats one type of food that my dad gets for him so my question was is it okay to suddenly take all the food from his bowl and fill them with carrots apples and stuff like that or it will be bad?

Greys are stubborn it's going too take a while too earn his trust.

Cas27 said:

Greys are stubborn it's going too take a while too earn his trust.

Click to expand...

Yeah thats true but i need some ways to earn their trust even its the long way thats why I have told what problems im facing here so I get some knowledge and deal with them and build that trust slowly, cuz if i didnt deal with going back in the cage and treats its gonna break his trust since i force him in the cage when he doesnt want

I say focus on these two things for now 1)Find a food he loves; 2)Work on Trust. The rest of what you *want* to do will depend on these two first.

1) Find a food he loves.
Is the food he is eating now pellets or seeds? I'm not going to get into the evils of an all seed diet, but if it is all seed, does he have a seed he prefers above the others? Remove that, and use it as your training treat. If it is pellets, work on introducing him to new foods (you should do this anyway). Fruits, veggies, grains, nuts, even bits of cheese. We are looking for a favorite "treat" so don't worry about it's nutritional value for now. It will take time, but one of these should emerge as a favorite - I'd place my bets on the nuts. He probably doesn't know those things are actually food yet. You just have to keep offering them. You can also sit next to him eating the foods and let him "steal" from your plate. Shoving the food in their face doesn't usually work. You can withhold his regular food for several hours everyday to encourage him to try the new foods.
EDIT** - if the regular food is pellets, you could also withhold pellets for a few hours and use them as rewards. Withholding food can be controversial.

2) work on trust. I think others have already posted on this. The "I love Amazons..." sticky on the Amazon forum is excellent foundation for all parrots. Because you're starting over, the "rescue" stuff applies to you. Specifically, for encouraging him back in the cage, you can try lowering the lights or using food.

Another suggestion is try to get him to eat other food and different kinds of pellets, don't want to be stuck if his brand has changed formulas or is not available. My CAG will eat two kinds of pellets any day so I am at least a little covered in case of an uncontrollable situation regarding needing food.

SassiBird said:

I say focus on these two things for now 1)Find a food he loves; 2)Work on Trust. The rest of what you *want* to do will depend on these two first.

1) Find a food he loves.
Is the food he is eating now pellets or seeds? I'm not going to get into the evils of an all seed diet, but if it is all seed, does he have a seed he prefers above the others? Remove that, and use it as your training treat. If it is pellets, work on introducing him to new foods (you should do this anyway). Fruits, veggies, grains, nuts, even bits of cheese. We are looking for a favorite "treat" so don't worry about it's nutritional value for now. It will take time, but one of these should emerge as a favorite - I'd place my bets on the nuts. He probably doesn't know those things are actually food yet. You just have to keep offering them. You can also sit next to him eating the foods and let him "steal" from your plate. Shoving the food in their face doesn't usually work. You can withhold his regular food for several hours everyday to encourage him to try the new foods.
EDIT** - if the regular food is pellets, you could also withhold pellets for a few hours and use them as rewards. Withholding food can be controversial.

2) work on trust. I think others have already posted on this. The "I love Amazons..." sticky on the Amazon forum is excellent foundation for all parrots. Because you're starting over, the "rescue" stuff applies to you. Specifically, for encouraging him back in the cage, you can try lowering the lights or using food.

Click to expand...

Thank you so much mate this reply has just everything I needed, btw he eats pellets only and sometimes i offer him sunflower seeds but cant work as a treat cuz he doesnt really like it, so i guess for now i should try to withhold his pellets and put fruits and vegetables there, ill be watching him every hour and see if he ate.
Btw thanks for lowering the lights idea it may work ill try it next time

My two cents...

I am an apologist for difficult birds, and the Rickeybird (and myself). My standard "liturgy"...

Even after all these years, I sometimes find myself putting myself or my bird down... stuff like...
I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THIS OR THAT.
WHY CAN'T HE BE SWEET AND NICE, LIKE A PUPPY?
PEOPLE WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHY I PUT UP WITH THIS.
Stuff like that.
But the Rb is a parrot... one generation out of the wild.
I do all the right things, as much/well as I can, but in the end, I just LOVE my bird,
Some parrots are SO SWEET, some are NOT. I'm HAPPY and a bit JEALOUS of those successes.
I have lessened my psychological and physical wounds over the decades... not because I've changed the bird, but I have changed me. And a lot of that has involved giving up on a lot of my desires/expectations. After years of battle, I surrendered. I admit... as to why have I not (and why am I unable/unwilling) to train the Rb to do anything that he doesn't want to do?
Example... if I have a treat, and he sees it and wants it, I HAVE to give it too him. I simply cannot/will not NOT give him what he wants. No training there!
Consequently, I have a Tazmanian Devil on my hands. I love him. I have no complaints, really. He's HIMSELF. And I'm MYSELF. And the result... check my Signature for videos. etc., if you like.
Over the years, I have been very embarassed/downhearted/sad about having a pet that was so... out of my control.
Follow all the great advice you'll get here... good for you for reaching out!
As for me, I have finally accepted that I have an amazing half-wild being who loves me and perches on my hand (sometimes) and speaks to me! It's magic enough.

Guys help me please, I've tried to have fun with him today I let him out he stood out I petted him alot and he had fun he went on my hand several times just because he had no choice and now I want him to go back inside he starts biting hard and gets aggressive and runs away alot and i cant put him in a no choice he just flies of my arm and lands on his chest cuz he doesnt want going in but i need to leave and im forced to force him in, how would i deal with that

Edit: if this keeps on i wont be able to let him out anymore since my parents are getting mad for me getting him out and cant get him back in anymore and i just cant let him out, no treats work nothing and his cage is large and has some games and stuff

Firstly you need to stay calm as they love yanking your chain if they can. Will pick up on this in double quick time.

Have you tried picking your time and just picking him up, probably will be so surprised by this he will go in no bother. You need to try and master a way that works for you but importantly stay calm. If you are calm and talk to him, tell him he's a good boy, blah, blah etc.

have you tried a piece of dry cracker as a treat?

I was tasked with getting a friends 'too back in her carry box as she was her hubby's bird and didn't like my friend. I wanted her to be there so I had to get her out and put her back. I developed a technique of sliding my arm around her body so she was carried rather than perched and talked to her and fussed her and before she knew it she was back in her carry case as good as gold. Confidence, goes a long way. Sometimes the method is less than ideal but as a start and as long as you are not hurting the parrot.

Keeping a bird locked up is not fair.