Choosing a bird for my lifestyle...

New to the forums and I really like what I see...all of you seem very realistic about bird ownership. After doing many searches I thought I would get advice about what parrot would fit my lifestyle. I've talked to breeders, but I've been left with many possibilities.

First, this would be my first parrot. I do have experience taking care of an African Grey (my neighbors would have me bird-sit from age 15-22 because their African Grey liked me). I never had trouble with her, and I took care of her two or three times a year for six years for 7-10 days at a stretch. Ever since that time I've wanted a parrot, but I was waiting until I was more stable and had a house of my own.

This is my situation:
My wife is a doctor and her work hours are all over the map. I have variable hours too, but a lot of work at home and I'm usually home for huge portions of the day. So, spending time with the bird shouldn't be a problem.

We have an almost 2 yr. old toddler named Max (Max will be on, "look but don't touch" terms with the bird). He is a full-throttle kid though, and that means the bird would have to be comfortable with the kind of chaos kids bring...Max does lots of running around and playing, even if the bird would have no direct physical contact, the bird would also have to contend with the sight of a toddler meltdown or two. Another kid is also in the long-term picture, although no immediate plans are in the works...it could be a few years down the line.

I'd prefer a bird that is not a "one person bird." I know all birds are individuals, but I'd like to keep it to breeds that can be social. This bird will obviously be in a multi-person family.

We also have a dog, but she is easy going and will also be on strict, "look, but don't touch" terms with the bird!

My wife is new to birds, so a bird that isn't known to bite or be overly domineering is also a plus. I know all birds bite from time to time, but it would be better if that wasn't a constant battle. And I'm talking about true bites, not the "please don't do that" nip.

We also usually go on vacation twice a year for about a week. It would be best if the bird could handle a sitter or being boarded. In a Pickle Aviary is nearby and they do a great job with boarding, but I know not all birds are great with that. We're probably going to get the bird from In a Pickle, so the boarding environment would be familiar to the bird.

There is also a high probability that we will move in 2.5 yrs. so the bird would need to adjust to a new environment when we do (another house, of course).

A bird that is still manageable AFTER sexual maturity is also a must...I know they go through changes and certain times of year might be a bit bumpy (wanting to be left alone a bit more is fine, being a bit moody is fine), but I'd like to stay away from a bird that goes totally nuts.

With those parameters, these are the kind of recommendations I've been given (in no particular order):

A Dusky Conure (quieter than Suns and not nippy like Green Cheeks)

Blue Crowned Conure (same reasons as a Dusky, but it's a bit bigger and a better talker...a little louder too)

Maximillian Pionus (easy going, relatively quiet couch-potato bird with some talking ability)

Timneh Grey (provided it is very well socialized...more clownish than a Congo and less likely to fiercely bond to one person)

Poicephalus Parrots (fun-loving, even-tempered birds...I know less about these birds, but they have been thrown into the mix, particularly the Meyers)


Also feel free to recommend any other types of parrots if they fit the bill, just be sure to give a realistic description of life with the bird.


Any help would be very appreciated. I really want thoughts from average people with experience (not just breeders), who live with these birds day in and day out and could give me a realistic assessment. No sugar coating. I've also read "So You Think You Want a Parrot," and I think I still do. I loved that post, however...very good realistic guidance.

Thank you all (in advance)!

~John

Hello John and welcome to the forum! You will find a lot of helpful information here. I have a Pineapple Green Cheek Conure, Rio. I have had him for about a month and a have now, and he is an absolute joy to my life. He just turned a year old a couple of days ago. He's very friendly and cuddly, very inteligent, (has learned step up/down, shake, wave, spin, and hang upside down in the time I've had him) He's not terribly noisy, can have a few shouts once in a while. This is mostly when he feels he's waited long enough for me to let him out! lol. He also seems to scream a bit when it storms, I don't think he likes thunder. Although he seems to like me best, he will readily go to my husband or guests to be held and played with. As for biting, knock on wood, but he hasn't bitten me, or anybody else yet! He's such a little clown, and brings me happiness everyday! Good luck in finding the perfect "bird buddy"!

It sounds to me like you have everything mapped out. So I would recommend the following:

1. Since it's your first bird, DON'T GET A RESCUE OR SECOND HAND BIRD!

2. Locate a reputable breeder and see what they have or will have in the near future. But make sure which ever bird you get has been fully weaned.

3. I would look at the following birds:

a. Senegal Parrot
b. Pionus Parrot
c. Green Cheek Conure
d. Myers Parrot

These are smaller parrots, but have a great personality and I think all all of the above are easy going and cuddly birds.

But now as far as being nippy or bitey, this is something that happens with every bird no matter HOW TAME they are. They can have a bad day like people do. Also most birds unless raised around children doesn't like the chaos.

This is where buying your bird from a GOOD breeder comes in. Most GOOD breeders will go that extra mile to ensure that their birds are well socialized before selling them. But then it's up to you to make sure to keep up with the socialization DAILY! You could probably even assist with the hand feeding or interact with your bird once you have put down a deposit on it of course. But that would be up to the breeder.

My main concern here is a two year old toddler. No matter how much you train your bird, training a toddler is impossible. So the more you tell them NO, is the more they will want to do what ever it is you DON'T WANT THEM TO DO. So to me, I might wait a few more years at least until the child gets closer to a manageable age like 6-7 and in school.

But if you insist, then THINK SMALL when it comes to beaks. A smaller bird with a smaller beak might draw blood when biting or pinching, but a big beak and break nones and even sever small fingers. I'm sure you know how kids like to stick their fingers into things (LIKE CAGES).

Good luck,
Mike

Well every bird will velcrow to here fav person so LOT AND LOT of family interaction as a baby is nessasary. I don't ever recommend larger breeds to first time owners but a grey seem to fit your persona. Plus the experience.
And iv seen more cags as family sociable birds then anyother.
Also they tend to talk rather then scream. There extremely dusty. So hopefull no allergies are a concern. But to me a cag fits you. And iv NEVER recommended a larger breed to ANY first time bird owners. You seem diffrent. so good luck on he decesion

Thanks for all the help so far.

A point of clarification:

The kiddo will have NO direct interaction with the bird...until a child is between 6-8 yrs. old I think most lack the self-control and gentleness to interact with a parrot. The parrot must merely be okay with a lot of commotion in the house...our house is set up where the parrot can be part of the action (and out of the cage), but the child and bird stay separate (thank goodness for child gates).

This in no way will be a child's bird, the parrot and child merely have to live under the same roof (much like the parrot and the dog). I'm the one that loves parrots (even though my wife is really game for the new addition) and I just want a bird that can handle the flow of family life.

I just want to make sure we could find a parrot that could thrive in that kind of environment...the last thing I would want is a miserable bird in an untenable situation (that's why so many rescues are full-up and I certainly don't want to add to that problem).

Keep the advice coming, I really appreciate it!

~J


P.S. Nippy from time to time is okay, but having dealt with the African Grey I know there's a big difference between a nip and a bite...and I do realize bites happen occasionally, but I've heard stories of birds that can bite rather frequently (unruly Amazons come to mind)...that's the kind of thing that I would like to avoid.

Also, I've lined up breeders for all the different birds. I have interacted with all the ones on the list, but a brief, even repeated, interaction is not the same as living with one. A breeder is definitely the way I will go, but I wanted feedback from normal folks with long-term experience, so I could get a bigger picture.

I am including a copy of a very nice posting about getting a parrot for the first time written by a former forum member. It speaks to the sometimes down sides of parrot guardianship that we may not even consider.

I have read so much about the wonders of living with a parrot.

From the majestic macaw, to the gentle african grey, to the cheeky amazon and the sweetness and joy that is a cuddly conure.

I can tell you - yes, it is all true. Those magical stories of bonding, love, cuddles and lifetime loyalty are real.

However, if you have come to the forum because you have decided you want a parrot, I urge you to consider the side we DON'T talk about as often - and that is the downside.

Plenty of people have posted problems on the forum with aggression/biting/unruly behaviour etc but in your quest for information gathering, have you actually read these posts? I bet you haven't, because if you do not know too much about parrot mentality, and behaviour, you will be forgiven for thinking that person is doing something wrong and they don't have a clue what they are doing.

That's where you are wrong .

Parrots are not like other pets. Their intelligence will not allow it.

If you want a parrot, then I really hope that before you have even started looking for that cute baby bird or even an adult, that you consider the following points.

Do you have your own home? Living with your parents or room mates isn't an ideal situation to have a parrot in. If you are still at home, can you take the bird with you when you move out - what about when you go to college? Work? HOW many hours will you work for? How many hours will the bird be alone? If you are with a room mate, is it fair to inflict upon them the noise, the mess, the fact their air fresheners and teflon pans/hair dryers/straighteners/ George Foreman grills will have to permanantly be resigned to the bin? That no, they cannot have parties because parrots require 8-12hrs of uninterupted sleep? Oh and SO sorry you're trying to study, but maybe you'd best go out if the parrot shouting is annoying you?

Do you have plenty of time to spend with your bird? By this I do not mean a few hours of an evening, I mean a LOT of time.....

Are you financially stable?

Are you aware that your bird must be taken to an AVIAN vet that will charge almost double to a regular vet to do something simple like shorten nails?

Does EVERYONE in your household support the idea of living with a parrot and are prepared to roll up their sleeves and get stuck in with training/care? Can everyone take a blood drawing bite or two? Because it WILL happen. Additionally, some birds will always dislike some human, even in it's own family. Are you ready for this?

Do your personal qualities include endless patience, love and respect?

Can you take the time to learn parrot mentality?

Have you considered what you will do if you find yourself with a bird that is aggressive/noisy/messy? We can't pick personality and for all the good sides, each parrot has a downside that may not be able to be corrected.

Can you offer a stable routine? Too many different times for feeding/out of cage/bed are not good for a bird and can distress them greatly.

Can you offer a LIFETIME's care to this bird?

You may be thinking: This girl is WAY over the top. She's a parrot NUT. She probably goes mental at people who eat meat and cries if you stamp on an ant.

No, I am not lol. That is the scary thing. I am just a normal person who happens to have a parrot and I can tell you that EVERY point above is essential. Any of the other wonderful guardian's on this forum would agree. I am not an expert or a spe******t. I do not have some sort of Parrot Degree behind me, I learn every day and I will continue to read everything I can get my hands on with relation to my bird because I want her to be as healthy and happy as possible.

Life with a parrot is fantastic, rewarding and there is never a dull moment but let me do what I intended to do and break the silence on the bad parts.

Parrots are:

Messy. They do not eat food. They throw food, mash it into furnishings, spray juice up the walls and onto the carpet. THEN they eat some food.
They can be toilet trained, but poop when they need to where they need to if something is too interesting to go back to the cage for.

Noisy. ALL parrots come with a certain amount of noise. The dawn and dusk chorus' are VERY important to them and although you can prevent screaming, it is something you will have to work at for a long LONG time. They are not like dogs, you cannot just call through to the other room "No shouting" and expect it to work.

Can get really uppity and show this via the channels of BITING. Some only in the beginning, others quite frequently - stock up on plasters.

Demanding. You must be able to have a parrot out of their cage for a few hours a day at least. They will not let you have any time off from this! They decide they want out? They want it YESTERDAY and they will not behave until you play ball.

Bossy. If you think you can curl up on the sofa with a book and your bird wants to play - forget the book. When you bring a new bird home, you cannot FORCE them to do ANYTHING. If you do, they will never trust you and therefore initially, things need to be on THEIR terms.

Destructive. Depending on the species and the personality of the bird, you may get one who is capable of ripping your sofa to shreds in the space of half an hour. Wallpaper, woodwork, curtains, cables....it ALL needs to be parrot proofed.

Specific health needs. All parrots need a good pellet mix as a base food. These are EXPENSIVE. They need seed and nuts - human grade. There's that £/$ again.....They need plenty of fruit and veg which really, need to be organic - unless you want to risk the pesticide issue.
The subject of care is a minefield with many, MANY dangers. No dried fruit, no peanuts, no chocolate, no onions, no caffeine...the list is not exhaustive. Non stick pans that release deadly fumes need to be binned - stainless steel is hard to clean. Checking your heating systems do not produce PTFE (teflon fumes). No air fresheners. No heavy duty cleaning products. Only stainless steel for your bird - metal poisoning is deadly. No open windows. Only natural cleaning of the cage. No exposed mirrors or windows until your bird is settled. No cables within beak range. No, no no no NO! There are so many I could not list them. Is the air humid enough? Prepare for higher leccy bills if your air is dry and you need a humidifyer. Bathing them every day.........on and on and on...

Not like other animals. Other domestic pets are different to parrots in the extreme. You can buy a cute puppy or kitten and within a few days, they will be acting like they can't remember where they came from. Not so with a parrot. BASIC trust takes weeks to get to. Deep trust takes months. Bonding can take YEARS. This is where your endless patience needs to kick in.

Talking. If you want a parrot just because they talk then you really shouldn't be getting one. Only happy, healthy, settled parrots will talk and then there are some that no matter how content in life, will never attempt to imitate a single noise.

Time consuming. Several clean ups a day, wiping away with warm water and lemon juice/vinegar/bi carb/natural products (anything else can be poisonous) - the cage, the bars, the floors, the walls, the toys, the bowls. Providing fresh water several times a day. Cooking and preparing mini dinners. Taking the time to buy lots of different safe toys so they can be rotated. TEACHING your bird HOW to play - it's not natural, you know. Teaching him you are trustworthy. Teaching your bird manners. Keeping him entertained.

Consider.....

Cages. RESEARCH what size and shape you need. This is a most important point. Too big for a small bird will result in fear. Too small will make for a miserable bird. The bar spacing needs to be correct for safety. No caught body parts or mashed feathers. The shape is important. A climbing bird will not thank you for a dome shaped cage. Good quality cages are a MUST. No rust.

Knowledge. You NEED to get the correct knowledge and be confident you know how to handle your future bird before you bring them home. Too many people take a bird home and then ask questions that they shouldn't need to ask. For example: How do I get my bird out of it's cage? How do I get my parrot to like me? How can I get my parrot to cuddle me? These people did no research beforehand. Get yourself Parrots for Dummies and a species specific book - you will need them. Anticipate every problem you can before you home your bird.

These are very basic needs of a parrot. This is them without the "Oh how cute, he said hello!" sugar coating.

Having a parrot in your home is not all roses and I'm sure everyone would admit to thinking: Just 10mins peace would be great.

I just hope that if you have not bought a bird and have read this, you have seriously considered what I've said.

Parrot rescue centres in the USA are packed out with birds whose owners were ignorant to the downsides. The UK's pet classifieds are full of birds who are "unmanagable" or "Don't have the time anymore." People who have all bought now and thought later - to the detriment of the bird. Because of people thinking having a parrot will be "cool", wild birds are STILL being caught in Africa and shipped like semi precious vases to people with more money than sense.

Please, make sure you are going into this with your eyes wide open to the downsides as well as the up. Make sure your new edition does not end up neglected, unhappy and wondering what it did to deserve such a scary, sad existence.

If you think you can provide a bird with all of these needs then I cannot wait until you bring your bird home, join the forum and make friends with us all!

a. Senegal Parrot
b. Pionus Parrot
c. Green Cheek Conure
d. Myers Parrot

As previously written these birds would surely fit your lifestyle. They are all small and usually well behaved. Good luck!!

Thanks, SB, I already read the post by Von1983 and thought it was wonderful. I'm acquainted with the downsides. After a lot of consideration, I feel I'm as prepared for that aspect of parrot ownership as I'm going to get (pre-plunge, of course).

While I know there's always going to be the downside, I think it can be much worse if you get a bird that is not compatible with your lifestyle. I'm trying my best to make sure I don't end up with a parrot that can't stand living in our house (or vise versa). Thus, I will never (foreseeably) have a Amazon, Cockatoo, or Macaw. The Caiques were eliminated because I didn't think I wanted to deal with that much activity from my bird...they are clowns for sure and good natured, but they must be the energize bunny of birds (at least the ones I've been exposed too).

Again, thank you all for taking your time.

~J

Just a quick side note that may not be a good representation of the species, but the two Senegals I know are definitely one person birds. That being said, Poicephalus and Pionus parrots are pretty awesome, and definitely seem to be more along the lines of what you're looking at.

Also, (although I'm totally biased) Quaker Parakeets are pretty cool, tend to socialize well, and most of the ones I've met are handleable by children and put up with kids well. As an added boon, even at their most bitey, I've only had a Quaker break my skin once, and that was more luck than anything.

Conures in general seem to be good family and starter birds. However, most of the larger ones (sun, dusky, nanday, and blue crowned) really are loud. Some seem quieter than others, but they're still not quiet birds. The smaller ones (green cheek, maroon bellied, etc) are super sweet and with a lot of training get over nippiness fast (based on experience with two friends who have them).

Definitely don't get a rescue bird as your first. I did and totally lucked out, but I'm fortunate to have a lot of home time and live alone so that I can work through learning how to deal with my first bird and break her bad habits, plus Penelope is totally sweet and was decently well behaved when I got her. I can hardly imagine trying to juggle a cranky bird who doesn't totally trust people and an energetic toddler at the same time, and I've had experiences with both. Get a sweet baby from a breeder and raise it well. You'll probably be better off in the long run.

I would just like to add that I have a daughter, who will be 4 in July. My ringneck, Chico, who is 30+ years old, was terrified of children, until he came to live with me. My child and him have bonded, and under the watchful eye of me, they will share treats together, and he will rest on her arm. She adores him, and I am happy they are friends.

I think your child should be part of the process, and be allowed to learn how to interact with the parrot. I am not saying he should be allowed to hold him, but even if its something as small as giving the parrot a treat is a start.

Just a thought.

I think the larger conures tend to be quiter On less frequent scale.
The medium ones are the noise makers. Suns goldcaps Jendays ect.
Vs mitreds blue crowns and goldies ect as the larger breeds are more mimickers or
grunters But still have an ear peircing scream.
I'd defiantly rule out these guys as a first bird.

Cockatiels are awesome