visitors...

I have an unusual question/problem. Not sure where this best fits in the forums...anyway....

How do you control or stop behavior of others near your birds? Some people seem to like to tease birds and some seem to think they know what they're doing and don't as far as I'm concerned. Most of this happens with family, so it's going to take some tact. We are working/training/playing but while this is going on we have people stop over and it feels like they are trying to undo all of this. What can we do without alienating family or harming our training? What is the best way to handle things? Holidays are coming up also.....and Holiday food.....seems everyone wants to feed the bird too.....BTW these are adults....they aren't taking a hint....so, how can we get the point across and not lose our friends and family???? Believe me, if it comes to health and comfort, the birds will always come first but I'm trying to stop it before it gets that far.....One bird is a blue & gold macaw....Thank You!!!

Some of my family does that to... so I just say please, do not feed her that and when they do anyways I say ok well if she dies from that, guess who is going to pay for her death! I also usually just keep her in the room and do not take her out. I understand if you don't want to be so harsh but no one touches my baby!

The macaw is in the combined living, dining and kitchen area.... The cage is to large to move to a bedroom..... While teaching not to bite the visitors are almost teasing and of course an animal or bird will bite if you keep pulling it away.

The visitors that think they know about birds don't care and want to open the door and reach in. Scares the bird and makes them hand shy.....There's got to be a tactful way to enforce rules for the bird....how has everyone else handled this???? Lock the cage while they're here???

I had that same problem happen with a good friend of mine. He encouraged our blue and gold Macaw to get up on him even though I told him she will bite. I was surprised that anyone would take that liberty with our family member! Now, when people are over, if they don't respect her space we remove her and put her back into her cage, or, she's on our shoulder of hand if she's having a good time. That way, we just remove her from the situation if they don't give her space. Thankfully, most of our friends and family have a fear of her large beak because my Dad talks about how many pounds of psi they can crush. He's very impressed about that. They laugh nervously and then Chrissy the macaw laughs too.

The easiest, most comfortable solution would be to avoid the situation all together and move the bird/s out of everyone's reach for the duration. If you can't do that, then you need to ask other family members for support in asking for respect for your birds. I get the impression you're not the home-owner here? Is that right? If that's the case, then have a serious conversation with your Mum and Dad/roommates/significant people and get them onside. Explain what you're trying to achieve with your birds and describe how thoughtless treatment can undo all your good work. The thing to keep impressing on people is that these are *your* birds and they're not the playthings of anyone else, no matter how experienced they may think they are. If you have to, say that out loud in front of everyone!

"My birds are not your toys. What you are doing goes against the training methods I have chosen and I've asked you to stop. Now, will you *please* leave my birds alone? I'd be glad if everyone else would do the same!"

You'd only have to say it once, I'd imagine. But stand your ground. No one has any right whatsoever to intrude on your birds, their space or their peace of mind. Anyone who still insists is an @$$hole and doesn't deserve to be considered at all when it comes to your birds' well-being.

I can't imagine people opening my cages to 'play' with my birds but I do know this: If was relatives and family I would have absolutely no problem just saying 'leave the damn birds alone!' Seriously though I'd just say so and you can put a little chuckle or laugh at the end to 'soften' it but hey, safety first. I'd have more of a problem with strangers than I would people I know.

I like to go to Omar's Exotic Birds whenever I am in Southern California. They let their birds hang around all day long on perches suspended from the ceiling. Anyone can walk up and "tease" (your word) the birds, pick them up, or get bitten. Somehow, against all odds, their birds seem to be doing quite well.

Are you convinced that your guests are not just showing an interest in your bird? Why not just go with the flow? Your parrot will be fine if he's in his cage, and you can easily take food away from him if your family or friends ignore your requests not to feed him.

Drama should be avoided over the holidays, unless you're watching "A Christmas Carol."

legal_eagle said:

Are you convinced that your guests are not just showing an interest in your bird? Why not just go with the flow? Your parrot will be fine if he's in his cage, and you can easily take food away from him if your family or friends ignore your requests not to feed him.

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This is a person who owns 2 macaws and thinks that he can just walk in to our house, open Simba's cage and start touching the bird, even though he knows the bird is still nervous and will bite. I've been trying to get this bird to trust me for 10 days and he's coming over and undoing all the trust that I've built with the bird. Then he starts giving him sweet junk food like apple pie, even though we tell him not to. I'm just about ready to tell him to get the flock outta here!

EDIT:He doesn't mean any harm. He thinks he's teaching the bird to be nice and showing us how it should be done. But he's from the "force them into submission" school of training. We don't believe in that.

This person thinks he knows more than the experts, doesn't research or try to improve anything. His birds are mean. The "I want to kill you" mean. He is the only person that can interact with them and yet he rarely does. Some birds have little toys and no outside of the cage play time. Everything we are against.... Our bird's sanctuary is his cage, where he feels safe. It shouldn't be opened by a stranger that's grabbing at him. The sugar amount he gives his own birds in one day is probably more that most give in a month. I tried being tactful and telling him we don't do things his way....food, cage, and showed him the training dvds that follow the training the original keeper of the bird used to no avail. That is why we were working with some of his smaller birds to help them. But he comes here and grabs at them too, undoing all that we've been trying to do....How do you tactfully stop a family member or friend that thinks they know more than the professionals??? I'm close to moving away or banning him all together....which I'm trying to not do. He's married to my sister but she won't speak up. She thinks he knows more than the professional too.....HELP!!!

Just tell him politely, but firmly not to touch/bother your birds and if he continues tell him he's no longer welcome to visit.

When I have parties, I put up a sign that says "If I don't know you, I may bite you. The sign has one of those severed plastic halloween fingers glued to it with a slash through it."

I believe in being subtle!

I also have a thick broken block of wood that I take with me when we go out and about. If someone is not taking the hint, I hand it to them, and ask them to squeeze it in half until it shatters. Obviously, no one can. Then I point out that the reason the block is broken is because she can... It makes a very persuasive argument for keeping fingers out of cages.

She wouldn't, but they don't know that...

As for toxic foods, I simply don't make anything that's potentially toxic... and I ask people politely not to feed them without talking to me first, and give them things they can feed them.

So far, everyone has been good about this.

This subject brings back some horrendous flashbacks that actually happened in MY house several years ago.

We were having my oldest son's college graduation party, LOTS of people were at our house, including "small" children. Well, the childrens' parents seem to be under the impression that I wasn't only "playing" hostess, but baby sitter at the same time. I TOLD the parents that under NO circumstances were the small children allowed alone with the birds, that they were to be supervised, and that under NO circumstances was anyone allowed to poke a finger into a cage.

To make a long story short, one of the "little" ones was bitten by my SUPER mellow Hunter. :11: She came out, screaming like someone had ripped her arm off, but Hunter hadn't even broken the skin.

When the parents tried to put the blame on me (for keeping vicious animals), I flipped a switch. They left, never to be seen or heard from again. OOPS. Too bad. Their loss, not mine.

Palmetto, it doesn't matter if this person thinks he knows all there is to know about your birds. They are YOURS, and YOUR rules are to stay far, VERY far away from them. Very simple rule. If he can't abide by it, show him the door. Be your birds' voice...I'm sure they'd tell him the same if they could.

Mine, as you know, have cages, but the cage doors don't close. They remain open during parties and gatherings, and the birds come and go as they please.

Maggie doesn't bite, but having the macaw sitting out loose on top of her 8 foot tall cage tends to discourage teasing... especially with the aforementioned sign.

And if the bird isn't interested in the interaction, they move away on the big playstand.

They have their own room. Visitors are asked to stay out of it unless I am there to supervise.

I'm sure that this man is the reason that it took Simba a little time to bond with Bruce. This man was over the afternoon we got him and done the same thing. Since I didn't require anything from him or open his door he decided i was ok. He loves Bruce now & that's his person....I'm just good company.....Bruce is fun.....

Unfortunately this man is a close relative and doesn't listen.....I will speak up & probably make some sort of sign to try to stop him. He thinks by giving him sugar that he's making friends and then opens the door to grab at him. He knows the bite, he has a BnG, Greenwing and a too...so he isn't scared. Visitor thinks he is teaching Simba and us....but what he's teaching is all wrong...

palmetto941 said:

I'm sure that this man is the reason that it took Simba a little time to bond with Bruce. This man was over the afternoon we got him and done the same thing. Since I didn't require anything from him or open his door he decided i was ok. He loves Bruce now & that's his person....I'm just good company.....Bruce is fun.....

Unfortunately this man is a close relative and doesn't listen.....I will speak up & probably make some sort of sign to try to stop him. He thinks by giving him sugar that he's making friends and then opens the door to grab at him. He knows the bite, he has a BnG, Greenwing and a too...so he isn't scared. Visitor thinks he is teaching Simba and us....but what he's teaching is all wrong...

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I don't let them get anywhere near my birds if they are going to do that stuff... I politely tell them NO!

AND ISN'T THIS THE GUY WHOSE BIRDS BITE EVERYONE ELSE?! UMMM... REMEMBER THAT DUDE? SHOE IS ON THE OTHER FOOT HERE...

I was having the same issue with my daughter's fiance, and wasn't sure how to handle it as things aren't so good with he and I. However, he stuck his hand in Slater's face right after we got him and Slater took a bite outta him. After he finished whining, he asked which of our birds don't bite, and I told him they ALL bite. Problem solved, he doesn't bother them anymore.

I understand you want to be tactful, but in this situation bluntness is the way to go.
State your rules and tell them they are not welcome if they can't abide by them in your house, point out that you would give them the same courtesy in theirs. They might not like it, but they will respect you more if you are up front.

palmetto941 said:

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Unfortunately this man is a close relative and doesn't listen...........

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Want me to come over and help? :54:

Relative or not relative, YOUR birds, NOT his.

Remember my comment about the door.