"sometimes" privileges

Does anyone else have things that your pets are allowed to do "when I say so" and no other time? My dog has a lot of things he is allowed to do "when invited" and never when not. It takes a pretty deep level of communication and consistency, and I was just thinking about it while we were playing "the foot game" which is the only time he is allowed to put his teeth one me (NOT biting or nipping) and the only time he is allowed to pull part of himself (in his feet) away from me when I try to touch it. He knows he can only do this when I initiate this special game that we both enjoy very much. He also knows things like he is only allowed to eat things that fall on the floor after he is given permission, and only allowed to jump onto the bed when invited specifically, only allowed to roam ahead of us on walks when given permission, otherwise he has to stay at our sides, etc. My birds don't have that many - shoulders and heads are only allowed when we put them there, and they are not allowed to force the issue with getting us to share food. Things like that. Does anyone else have this kind of thing with their pets?

Rarely will Raven be on my shoulder. Don's shoulder yeah, but he's more tolerant with him than me although he's MY bird! :52:. Raven poops often for his size, so I'll only do it when I'm wearing something that's going into the wash lol.

What I really wanted to post for is to tell you what a breath of fresh air it is that you have a super well trained dog. I read your other post mentioning it. So many people have large unruly dogs that will just jump up all over you with absolutely no manners. A good friend of mine is the worst... She treats a dog like it's a newborn human (the way she talks to the dog), so consequently when she tells him 'no' the dog doesn't even hear her. Once, at a memorial service held at her home, her past (large) dog was so hyper and wild she went around jumping on everyone, ripping at silk scarves, people's nice dress clothes... It was awful. Their current dog is even larger and maybe not quite as hyper, but really bad. When I go over there, I have to consider what I'm wearing "hm, do I mind getting these clothes all soiled and ripped?"

We have our struggles with people coming over, and the frustrating part is that in reality it is a "husband training" issue rather than a dog training issue, because Josh like Ranger to greet him with lots of excitement. It makes him feel loved and he still doesn't seem to get that we are training our dog to get excited when people come over. Once Josh gets it, Ranger will learn quickly but in the mean time I am not willing to confuse the dog over the issue, because I want him to understand when the time comes.

We got a LOT of criticism when he was a puppy. If I had a dime for every time I got told "but he's just a puppy!" and scolded for being too "strict with him," I could buy myself another parrot! I just looked at them and said "Yes, and soon he will be a large dog. Puppies are much easier to train." I actually had to restrict some people from interacting with him! That did NOT make me popular at the dog park!

Anyway, thank you for liking well trained dogs. I get very frustrated when people let their dogs, large or small, act like idiots. Their birds, too. And kids. I understand everyone, human or animal, has their bad days, but SERIOUSLY it should not be the norm. I get especially angry when people let their small dogs growl, snarl, and snap and then laugh at it. HELLO that is NOT CUTE! If my dog did that, someone would call the cops on me! Did you know that statistically speaking the dog that is most likely to bite you is a Dachshund? Not a big dog at all, but because of their size they are allowed to do all sorts of dominant behaviors and run their humans. Ugh. End rant. For now...

My experience with pets were more "free willing". With my only trainable bird, Izzy, she was more LET ME DO IT. IM GOING TO DO IT IDC WHAT YOU SAY. The dogs...oh boy. They need socialization and lots of training, but it's beyond my control. My dogs are much like RavensGryf's friend. One (Boston) jumps and bites from excitement while clawing you with his very sharp claws. (It's painful having him on your lap in a car ride) and the other (terrier) rather bark at strangers.
I don't play with them as often because I am at risk for being scratched and or bitten.

I might have found out why they do the things they do, which is a good start of trying to assist the bonding like you and your dog:
Terrier: Lived with an elderly man, possible minimal socialization (still minimal now :/), unsure why she's so food aggressive.
Boston: Lived on the streets, might have thought other dogs were dangerous and competition for food - thus his love to eat food and anything.

The basic reason why dogs disobey is that they either do not know the rules, or do not care because you have not established yourself as the pack leader. When dogs see you as the pack leader they will obey every rule they understand set by you. Sometimes they will test, but as a rule they will obey.

SilverSage said:

The basic reason why dogs disobey is that they either do not know the rules, or do not care because you have not established yourself as the pack leader. When dogs see you as the pack leader they will obey every rule they understand set by you. Sometimes they will test, but as a rule they will obey.

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I honestly don't want to be their pack leader since they aren't my dogs and but I do help with their water food and their daily scratches lol! However, they both know not to mess with me on some good days because I know their fears and what they hate but I really try not to do anything.
Before to keep them from running into the house, I'd hold a rake and hula hoop since Nala (terrier) hates hula hoops and Max (boston) hates rake. Now when I go inside they just watch. Also, if I'm watching Nala will obey to go inside her crate or do it by herself since I used to give her treats for doing so.

I'm working with Nala to stop her growling and barking when we pass her while she's inside. So far with our growling battles she's the one that gives up, it usually just takes saying "thats a pretty smile" but for me I have to growl and hiss back for her to stop.

Honestly, I hate to say it, but it sounds like a dangerous situation, I am glad those are not large dogs you are talking about. No dog should growl at people that it lives with. EVER. All humans should be seen as superior beings by dogs. It is when they see humans as equals or subordinates that attacks, destruction, separation anxiety, and fighting between dogs in the household, etc happen.

SilverSage said:

Honestly, I hate to say it, but it sounds like a dangerous situation, I am glad those are not large dogs you are talking about. No dog should growl at people that it lives with. EVER. All humans should be seen as superior beings by dogs. It is when they see humans as equals or subordinates that attacks, destruction, separation anxiety, and fighting between dogs in the household, etc happen.

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I agree 100% everyone has been bitten (except our grandma) and everyone besides our younger sister has gotten blood drawn by her. She's way too protective of her crate and her toys, so Ive tried to expose her a bit more which helped a tiny bit.
I've tried suggesting obedience training to help with walking and more socializations to both humans and dogs but I got a more "stay in your own lane" response.

The lane is birds btw

Hmm.. I can't really think of any sometimes privileges my birds have. I'm not gonna lie, I think it is hilarious when they snatch food off my fork/plate. We just don't have them out while we're eating if it is something they can't have.

The dogs definitely have sometimes privileges. Like you, my dogs are BIG. I've got an 80lbs Boxer and a 125lbs Great Dane. And, like you, I got so many comments raising the Dane (Boxer we got as an adult) about how I was too strict on a little puppy.

Dogs know that when we're eating, they must be laying on their beds. They also are not allowed to eat something just because it falls on the floor unless they're given the okay.

Honestly, I think a strong leave-it and drop-it command are essential when you have dogs and animals they could consider prey as pets.

We don't generally go for unleashed walks -- there isn't anywhere around here that it would be "acceptable" to do so. If we drive up to my parents in the boonies I guess we do sometimes, but we never really trained them to go on ahead if given permission. They just don't roam out of sight and if I call them, they come back.

Bed/couch aren't sometimes -- they're just allowed up if they want.

I hate nothing worse than dogs without basic manners. I am not big on trick training and such...my bigger dog is a chow mix..so she's sort of dumb anyway but she still knows sit/stay/down/come/drop it/no/shake AND knows hand gesture commands. My other dog is a 40lb lab/sheltie and she's super smart and can hunt as well.

My "aunt" (blood relative, no longer speak to her) has enormous dogs (danes, mastiffs) who don't even know 'sit'. They BITE. I won't go anywhere near them. It's horrible. My husband has a scar and one bit my smaller dog. And it's clearly our fault? Yeah, no.

I still feel I'm pretty lenient with my pets. They get a lot of privileges, but because they'd earned them.

I have the same tolerance for untrained dogs as I have for untrained children which is 0%
I have a standard poodle who is 74 lbs and almost as tall as me when he is standing on his hind legs so it is imperative that commands are obeyed as soon as they are uttered. He will dance with me, it's hard to describe but he really knows he is dancing with me. He will weave around my legs and put his paws on my shoulders while dancing but only when I say "dance with momma". This was something I had to train and establish with him because we mostly dance to the song "Happy" he gets very excited when it comes on and we had a few times that it came on while I had my back to him and was painting and he thought it meant "dance break" and almost knocked me into the wet painting! So setting firm boundaries on when we dance had to happen and he doesn't do it to anyone else, he is just to large to allow him to jump on anyone.

I just got a mini schnauzer and was quite horrified to learn that at 6 months she had not been taught anything yet! Not even sit! They are extremely intelligent so it just comes down to being lazy on the part of the person I got her from.

Food when dropped is never picked up unless I give the okay. The poodle won't take treats/food from anyone's hand but mine. This was not something I trained him to do though I did train this in my dogs when I had doberman's because they are the type of dogs people will try to poison.

Years ago I raised Doberman's and people couldn't believe how well I trained my dogs. I could put a piece of steak on the floor put the dog in a sit stay and leave the room. Even if my husband said he could have it he waited until the command came from me. A dog who consistently knows his or her place in the pack is a happier dog imo.

There are plenty of people who thought I was too strict but I raised two boys who NEVER sassed me, never told me no, I hear kids say things to their parents that I can't believe! I was in line at the grocery store last week and had to listen to a 10 year kid repeatedly tell his mother to shut up! I had to bite my tongue from asking the mother "are you really going to let him talk to you like that?" because obviously she did!

labell said:

I have the same tolerance for untrained dogs as I have for untrained children which is 0%

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100% agree, and as we all know... There are A WHOLE LOT of both out there!!

As far as dogs go, I think they are probably the world's most popular pet animal? Yet seems only a small percentage of owners really 'understand' the mentality and social structure of dogs enough to be effective pack leaders. They think by being lenient with rules or using too nicey-nice of a voice is being "kind" to their beloved pet, when truly it is doing them a disservice. I think also, many people probably fail to realize that even though 'domestic and tame', they still need training!

After some close calls in my life (as well as hearing it happen to people) I'm hesitant to go walking in a residential neighborhood for fear that a dog will run out of the garage or off of the lawn as I pass by and attack me! Then people just laugh and say "oh he won't really bite". Yeah, right.

EAI, I have to say that with dogs like that "socializing them" with other humans or dogs is just asking for trouble. They should not allowed anywhere near other dogs or people until they have a stable pack structure, which they clearly do not. They NEED this. I highly suggest watching Cesar Milan's show "Dog Whisperer" on Nat Geo Wild. You can watch him on Youtube for free. It is not fair to the dogs to deprive them of the pack order that they NEED as dogs, and eventually if they don't learn, they are going to bite someone NOT in the family and get killed for it. Also, you SHOULD NOT even CONSIDER bringing a parrot into a house with such dangerous, out of control dogs. And let me be clear, dogs who do not have a pack leader are NOT HAPPY. They are suffering from extreme amounts of stress as they try to control their "human pack" who refuses to obey - that is why people are getting bitten. Dogs are not birds, and almost nothing about how they think is the same.

I know what you mean about getting attacked in residential neighborhoods! I have never been, but I have had dogs run out and attack my dog. I have since learned that when a small dog runs up to me I holler at it as loud as I can, either "GO HOME! GET OUTTA HERE!" and display aggressive, dominant body language to them, or I yell "YOUR DOG IS CHASING ME AND MY DOG IS BIGGER!!" Sometimes followed by (if there is time) "YOUR DOG IS GONNA GET EATEN!!" Not because my dog would, but because I find most people care a lot more about saving THEIR dog than saving MY dog. And lets be honest, my dog IS bigger than most people's, and I am NOT willing to have him blamed for a fight.