Do you ever experience "pre-adoption" anxiety?

[Dinosrawr]

I'm currently looking into adopting another parrot, specifically an Indian a Ringneck. I'm in contact with the breeder, but unfortunately there's been no action in the nest box and it's the only breeding pair she's putting up this year. With all this waiting time I've had, I keep thinking to myself:

"Oh my goodness. Maybe they're not the right bird for me. Should I try a different bird species?"
"What if I can't make it happy like I do for Avery?"
"Should I even get another bird? Am I even capable enough to take care of another bird?"
"What if it hates me?"

Of course, most of this I know I can work through with proper patience and care (mind you, harness training Avery has taken me nearly 6 months... I refuse to force it on her. We've almost got it all the way, though!), but I'm terrified of not being "loved", which I realize is an unfair expectation to place on a parrot. Personally, I'd never leave a bird even if it didn't "want" me - they deserve a good, healthy life regardless of how much they bond to me.

How often do you ladies and gents experience these feelings when you're looking into adding a new fid to your family? What are your positive and negative experiences/stories regarding adoption? I always love reading the stories you guys have

 

[MikeyTN]

I stop thinking about it long ago as some birds will learn to either tolerate or love you over time. At least that's been my experience.

 

[BeakFace]

I got this call out of the clear blue, will you take Luci for me, yes Black Palm Luci from Youtube? I had decided no more birds long before this call. Anyway I just could not say NO! Taking in a bird almost 15 years old that had been with its owner since she was 6 months of age! Anyway like MikeyTN said, and that's the way it is. I go slow with her and its working out. I'm still learning and she is tolerating it!

 

[Birdbrain91]

I went through that when I adopted my B&G macaw, you wouldn't be human if you didn't.
Its scary making a life time commitment just like marriage/having kids. It means you are really thinking about it and understand what it takes to have parrots. I wish more people thought about it like you are.

I'm all for adoption there are so many great parrots out there that need a good home and a second chance. It doesn't mean the parrot was/is bad its a two way street and maybe it wasn't a good fit or the owners didn't have time any more. But this could happen with a baby as well.

When we got Wesley I knew he was a strong willed bird but I fell in love with him the 1st time I saw him. He can be a hand full (most macaws are) but we are learning together and I think that will make our bond stronger. Don't rule out adoption!!

 

[hacatta]

When my parents order my first Green cheek for me,the breeder didn't let anything hear from him for 3 months,they had already paid.
I was so deadly afraid i wouldn't get her,but i got her and he even gave me wrong info that thankfully was set right here.
As for my others,my parents came home with them without telling me so i didn't even got the time to worry.
But as i didn't had time to even adjust to the idea of an other bird ,i was pretty conflicted about them,they were just there in a moment.
But you will learn to love them.

 

[Kiwibird]

Finding Kiwi was an 8 month process that almost made me give up on looking for a bird. I grew up with parrots, so I knew firsthand about daily care needs, diet, signs of illness, the noise level, the mess, the occasional bite ect... However, my parents had their birds long before they had me, so they were all tame by the time I came around. I was VERY worried about socializing a new bird on my own. I had reptiles and fish growing up, but I had never in my life had an animal I participated in training (like a dog or cat and certainly not a bird). All the modern training techniques I read up on were things my parents never heard of and while they love their birds and the birds are happy and friendly, they trained them the "old school" way. Then I got scared if I would ever find a bird for sale. My parents were also the ONLY people I knew who had birds, and when they got theirs, it was a different world. They bought all their on impulse in a few year period after reading a book on parrots in the local library. 2 they bought as babies and managed to wean on the advice from the man who ran the petstore. The other was a wild-caught who had just cleared customs. By the time I was looking for my own bird, you certainly couldn't just go down to the local petstore and pick a baby out of a tub, they no longer imported wild caught birds (rightfully so), no local petshops sold anything bigger than a conure and breeders I found online had waiting lists a year-out. It was only by chance I thought why not call the local dog/cat shelter and just see if maybe they had someone give a bird up, and they told me there were actually avian shelters (who knew?).

Then started the adoption process. Again, my parents were the only people I knew who had parrots, and they'd had theirs for over 30 years at that point who were all happy, healthy birds. I never knew how much of a problem it was for people to buy parrots and then just get rid of them for behaving like parrots, or to abuse them in the ways they do and when I started researching it, I saw terrible things. I had never seen pluckers or mutilators before. I had never heard of someone never feeding their bird fruit so now it had liver disease or someone never allowing a bird out of it's cage, or that these beautiful creatures had an average of 7 homes in their lives. I knew I HAD to save one of these poor babies. Then we found out how difficult the adoption process was- we were flat out denied from the first place I applied because my husband and I were 19 at the time, lived in an apartment and my husband had no experience with birds. The second place I called before filling out the application and explained my experience, so the lady was more willing to work with me. I was pretty adamant on the size- amazon (#1 choice because I was familiar with them) and would consider an eclectus or gray. But, they pretty much had all really large or really small, so I got put on a waiting list. Finally, a lady contacted them about surrendering Kiwi, but she lived about 7 hours away from the shelter, and since we lived about 3 hours away from her, rather than bringing him all the way to them, they put us in direct contact with her. We went up the next day, and it was love at first sight (well for me anyways lol, my hubby just rolled his eyes and Kiwi didn't like anyone at that point). In any case, I knew I couldn't leave him there and the rest is history. Training WAS more difficult than I ever imagined, he ended up falling for my husband (he's friendly with me, just not madly in love with me), and the little turd was 100% worth every bite and every crying "he's never going to like me" session I went through with him. After 6 years, he's settled and happy with us, and I think he's probably it for birds :30: Maybe I'll adopt a tortoise or something that doesn't bite or need to be trained in the future lol.

 

[Terry57]

I have always had those thoughts when adopting another fid to add to the flock. I was wonder if I can make them happy and give them a better home than they currently have.
With as many fids as we have, it may seem I never say no to one but I have decided against on many occasions because I didn't think I was the right fit for them and couldn't make their life better.
I think that especially if there is a wait to get one, these feelings are natural

 

[Dinosrawr]

Oh my. Lots of wonderful stories! It's amazing what journeys many of you have gone through when adding to your flock, and it makes me incredibly happy knowing that your birds have such warm, loving homes. I hope I can do the same

 

[Terry57]

I am sure that you are going to be a fantastic parront! It is the lucky fid who lives with you

 

[laurendelfing]

I had the same thoughts and anxiety when I was on my way to place a deposit on my bird. I feel although this is totally normal; you're just being responsible and wanting to make the best choice for the new addition to your family. I have had my bird home for about a week now and i'm so happy. I sat down with myself and through through all the questions, answered them for myself, and in retrosepct, I know i've made the right choice.

Best of luck!

 

[labell]

I do think a little anxiety is good, it means you are giving it the careful thought you should.
All of mine except the last two were well thought out and actively searched for. The last two fell in my lap or should I say by the very calculated planning of a good friend that brought me to the right place to see them knowing I couldn't say no.
Now that said, I did and do have anxiety, especially since the flock I had before the two new additions have if not an absolute love for each other a tolerance that we can all get a long quite comfortably. Any new or additional parrot changes you and your lifestyle. I think a person would be smart to be a little anxious.