Farewell my little angel

lupin

New member
Feb 14, 2022
2
35
'Rahaa' was a 4 year old cockatiel whom I adopted when he was a 3 months old chick .he passed away 4 days ago on thursday night , I'm sinking in my own tears right now, can't stop thinking about him,I've got the terrible feeling of guilt and sin, because he could've been saved, but I wasn't there to help him ,didn't get the chance to say goodbye to him...

in the past few months due to increasing pressure of work, I have to leave the house and sleep at my workplace and i only can come home once a week, I knew this was so hard for him to stay away from me but i had no other choice. but my mother and sister were always at home with him.

little Rahaa had an illness which no vet could discern the cause, and so couldn't find any cures for him. sometimes on random occasions he started to breathe heavily and rapidly, the only temporary remedy I could find for him which seemed to work (by searching the internet) was to blow warm eucalyptus steams and let him inhale for a few minutes. this usually reduced his problem and he was fine again.

whenever I was about to leave the house, he started to get upset and scream, but on thursday when i was leaving, he just sat there starring at me and i left without saying goodbye to him...:cry:

a few hours later his illness comes back and my mom doesn't notice it until its too late, she says Rahaa ate his dinner and went up the drawer to take a nap as always. during this time his breathing starts to go heavy but my mom doesnt notice him, after a while he flies on my mom's laps to let her know he's sick, but it was too late...:cry: he dies in my mom's arms afew minutes later due to shortness of breath....
now I feel guilty for not being there for my best friend, while he was always there for me. I think his illness came back because he was depressed, and thinking about this really makes me hate myself, I feel terrible.

he was always wandering about me whenever I was at home, he used to fly with haste to sit on my shoulder and sing happy tunes whenever i got home from work and then he'd start to groom my hair with care, he liked to share food with me whatever was on my plate. every mornings on 8, he used to open his cage with alacrity and jump out just to pull my eyelashes gently with his beak to get me out of bed for his breakfast...

I'll miss you and will never forget you little angel, I'm sorry for not being there for you, please forgive me for not knowing your true value until you're gone.:cry:



thanks for reading my story.
 

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BirdyBee

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'Rahaa' was a 4 year old cockatiel whom I adopted when he was a 3 months old chick .he passed away 4 days ago on thursday night , I'm sinking in my own tears right now, can't stop thinking about him,I've got the terrible feeling of guilt and sin, because he could've been saved, but I wasn't there to help him ,didn't get the chance to say goodbye to him...

in the past few months due to increasing pressure of work, I have to leave the house and sleep at my workplace and i only can come home once a week, I knew this was so hard for him to stay away from me but i had no other choice. but my mother and sister were always at home with him.

little Rahaa had an illness which no vet could discern the cause, and so couldn't find any cures for him. sometimes on random occasions he started to breathe heavily and rapidly, the only temporary remedy I could find for him which seemed to work (by searching the internet) was to blow warm eucalyptus steams and let him inhale for a few minutes. this usually reduced his problem and he was fine again.

whenever I was about to leave the house, he started to get upset and scream, but on thursday when i was leaving, he just sat there staring at me and i left without saying goodbye to him...:cry:

a few hours later his illness comes back and my mom doesn't notice it until its too late, she says Rahaa ete his dinner and went up the drawer to take a nap as always. during this time his breathing starts to go heavy but my mom doesnt notice him, after a while he flies on my mom's laps to let her know he's sick, but it was too late...:cry: he dies in my mom's arms afew minutes later due to shortness of breath....
now I feel guilty for not being there for my best friend, while he was always there for me. I think his illness came back because he was depressed, and thinking about this really makes me hate myself.

he was always wandering about me whenever I was at home, he used to fly with haste to sit on my shoulder and sing happy tunes whenever i got home from work and then he'd start to groom my hair with care, he liked to share food with me whatever was on my plate. every mornings on 8, he used to open his cage with alacrity and jump out just to pull my eyelashes gently with his beak to get me out of bed for his breakfast...

I'll miss you and will never forget you little angel, I'm sorry for not being there for you:cry:

thanks for reading my story.
I'm sorry for the loss of your little guy:cry:

You really did the best you can, don't beat yourself over it. Grief is hard, especially when guilt is involved. Take your time to grief. Move on when you feel ready, and don't just "get over" it, it will just make you feel worse.

I bet Rahaa had a great life with you. Their life is only as good as you make it and you made it the best you could.

Fly high, Rahaa šŸ•Šļøā¤ļø
 

Vilatus

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Jul 17, 2017
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Iā€™m so sorry to hear about your baby.

Please know you tried your best for him. Many people wouldnā€™t take the time to find a remedy at home to ease their birdā€™s symptoms! And if vets couldnā€™t find the cause, there was nothing you could have done to help any more. You tried your hardest for him it sounds like. Sometimes our babies just donā€™t get a good hand when it comes to their body.

Life happens as well, and unfortunately most people canā€™t just quit their work to be home with their pet. Itā€™s not like he was alone, he had your family. Please take comfort in that.

Iā€™m sure he loved you very much, and you him.
 

Scott

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RIP Gandalf and Big Bird, you are missed.
My deepest condolences for the passing of precious Rahaa. May his beloved memories give comfort as you grieve. Our best efforts often confounded by life's complexities beyond control, please be kind to yourself, allow full spectrum of sadness to flow.

We are always here for discussion and support.
 

foxgloveparrot

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Fly free, Rahaa. He sounded like an incredible little birby. Heā€™s proud of you, and he loves you and will watch over you, always, no matter what. Iā€™m so sorry ā¤ļø
 

LaManuka

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Welcome to the forums, lupin, but I am so very sorry to hear of your baby's passing. It's clear from your writing how very much you loved and cared for him, and that you did everything you possibly could for him. Sadly though, as many of us know, sometimes all of our efforts and devotion are not enough. I'm glad you found this place though, because there is great comfort to be found in telling your story to others who understand how much this hurts, and who have been there too as so many of us have. I pray that your heart will find peace, and that one day Rahaa's memory will bring you more smiles than tears.

Fly free, beautiful Rahaa, you will be forever remembered and loved ā¤ļø
 
OP
lupin

lupin

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Feb 14, 2022
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I truly appreciate your support, it is invaluable. I'm so glad I found this place with people who really understand the pain.
I've not been able to work since he left us, I start to cry at random, can't eat... wish I could spend more time with him, I really dont know why this is coming to my head right now that he is gone, maybe I should've designed an oxygen chamber for him, I thought I found the right treatment for him I never knew his breathing issue will become too critical. but these 'should've been/could've been' s are of no use right now, and that is what is killing me.

I just wanted to say to those who are sharing their life with a parrot for the first time, to cherish every single second with these angels. Rahaa was my first parrot buddy, and I don't think I'll be able to replace him with another, first of all I can't really watch another angel to suffer, secondly, no other bird on this planet will ever be like Rahaa for me.
 
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LaManuka

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Oh lupin, you are quite right, you will never "replace" Rahaa with another and it would be pointless to even try because there will never be another like him. Your pain is still fresh and raw right now and you will naturally grieve for some time to come, that is totally normal and to be expected as you have only just lost the one you loved so very much. But you are helping yourself to heal by acknowledging your pain and giving it voice here, and the passage of time will help to dull it's sharpest edges too. I know that Rahaa loved you, and he still does, and he does not want you to suffer or to punish yourself. And I also think, although you may not feel like it right now, you should not close yourself off completely to the idea of having another parrot one day. There might just be another precious feathered baby out there somewhere who would be the luckiest little birdie in the world if they could be found and adopted by someone as loving and caring as you. šŸ™
 
Feb 11, 2022
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I wholeheartedly agree, lupin. Rahaa could never be replaced by any bird and I couldn't imagine my Periwinkle to be either. These little birds really have their own personalities and no matter what happens to them they will always be with us. You did as much as you could and you should be proud for giving him the best possible life. Never think otherwise. :)
 

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