How do you deal with the loss of a parrot. Mine died yesterday

[Shan1706]

I'm a first time parrot owner. Bought my sweet angel of a bird 6 ish months ago. His name was Eli and he's a white capped pionus parrot. He was only 11 months old

I tamed him myself (he was parent raised). I followed every rule in the book to keep him safe

A couple weeks ago, something didn't seem right, his poop was a bit watery and I just had a feeling, but couldnt actually pin point anything
The vet appointment was supposed to be tomorrow.

yesterday I woke up and saw him at the bottom of the cage, trying to climb back up but he couldn't. He was so weak. It came out of the blue, it was so sudden. The night before he seemed fine, if a bit tired looking. He let my and boyfriend stroke him for the first time ever, i thought our bond was just getting closer

Whilst on the way to the vet he died in my partners arms

I am absolutely devastated. I've never grieved the loss of a pet before. I don't know how to handle it.

Does anyone have any advice for coping? I keep blaming myself for not seeing that something was wrong with him the night before

I just want him back

 

[wrench13]

I am so very sorry this happened to him and to you. Parrots, as prey animals, hide any signs of illness extremely well, so by the time they are showing any signs they are already quite sick. The watery poop and signs of lethargy were tip offs that something was not right, more likely very much not right. Keep that in mind should you get another parrot.

Many of the members on here have lost treasured feather babys over the years, I know I have. With Max, there was zero signs, he just ...........went one day. It is horrible and I never cried so much before (big bad biker and pirate that I am). I console myself with trying to remember all the funny, cute and loving things Max did with us. It does help, and the hurt fades somewhat over time.

What was his name? Reason I ask, I make a donation to Cornell Univ. Vet program 2X a year, in the names of all the ParrotForums parrots that have passed away in the period. I would include yours.

 

[Jcas]

I am so very sorry for your loss. As Wrench13 said, most of us on this forum have experienced the devastation of losing a beloved bird. Having them go so quickly and unexpectedly is so much harder as you don’t even have a chance to prepare for it. I wish I could give some magical steps to make the pain go away but I can’t. Grief is the price of love and we love our pets so much. You just have to keep moving forward one day at a time and I promise that in time the sorrow will fade. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to grieve however you need to. Gradually, you will be able to remember the good times you shared with your bird without the fresh pain of loss. It sounds like your bird lived a wonderful life in the short time you had him. Praying you can find peace and comfort in this time ❤️🙏☮️

 

[Claires]

First of all, I’m so so so sorry for your loss and I wish there’s anything I can do to help.

This is a hard question to answer tbh. But I lost my tiel last year and followed by my BFA like 2 weeks later, it was very devastating and depressing. I was crying for weeks and almost went full blown insane. So I understand how terrible it is to lose your feathered baby.

Everyone grives differently and it is important and it’s okay to let yourself to grief; cry as much, scream as loud, etc. Take one step at a time, talk to someone, and never forget and always take care of yourself.

The one thing you have to look forward to is ‘there would always be a light at the end of the tunnel’ as what my vet said to me when I lost my babies…

Another extra; he died on the arms of someone he knew and loved, not in some cages in the clinic surrounded by stranger, mine was gone in the vet, and how I wished I could turn back the clock and have him on my arms when he left…

 

[GaleriaGila]

Wonderful words above.

I'll add a few. Your darling passed while loved and treasured... so many billions would love to have that when they passed. I believe that the love you two shared lives on in Eternity.
Thank you for sharing with us.

 

[Free as a bird]

I'm a first time parrot owner. Bought my sweet angel of a bird 6 ish months ago. His name was Eli and he's a white capped pionus parrot. He was only 11 months old

I tamed him myself (he was parent raised). I followed every rule in the book to keep him safe

A couple weeks ago, something didn't seem right, his poop was a bit watery and I just had a feeling, but couldnt actually pin point anything
The vet appointment was supposed to be tomorrow.

yesterday I woke up and saw him at the bottom of the cage, trying to climb back up but he couldn't. He was so weak. It came out of the blue, it was so sudden. The night before he seemed fine, if a bit tired looking. He let my and boyfriend stroke him for the first time ever, i thought our bond was just getting closer

Whilst on the way to the vet he died in my partners arms

I am absolutely devastated. I've never grieved the loss of a pet before. I don't know how to handle it.

Does anyone have any advice for coping? I keep blaming myself for not seeing that something was wrong with him the night before

I just want him back

My deep condolences it's always hard loosing our feathered friends.

The same thing happened to me last year. A pet cockatiel died only 6 months after I got her. I was shattered.

First thing you have to do is stop blaming yourself. You did nothing wrong. Its hard because you can't pinpoint a cause but your not to blame. We try our best to look after these guys but sometimes it's out of our hands.

Birds are good at hiding their sickness cos If they appear sick in the wild they get targeted. Usually by the time we notice they're very weak already at the bottom of the cage, all fluffed up, low on energy and very sick.

Anyway mourn your loss. After a while if your comfortable you can get another bird

 

[Slim]

I have never lost a bird before, but I imagine it is just as painful as losing other pets you love. There is no good way to handle it in my experience. As many others have said, birds hide their illnesses very well. You seem to have cared for your bird immensely, and with this experience (as awful as it is) you'll be an even better bird owner in the future. I hope you find peace with this loss, and find the ability to love again.

 

[francisp]

I’m very sorry for your loss. I don’t have advice on how to get over it, just my sympathy and shared grief over losing a bird. I lost my black capped conure, Basil, at the beginning of December and I’m still grieving almost as intensely as I was the day after it happened. Like others have said, try to give yourself as much time as you need, even though we don’t exactly live in a society that allows much bereavement over pets.

In the meantime, I’m just trying to learn what I can from his passing while not blaming myself for it and remembering the good years we had together. Sorry you and your bird didn’t get longer.

 

[JenA]

I'm a first time parrot owner. Bought my sweet angel of a bird 6 ish months ago. His name was Eli and he's a white capped pionus parrot. He was only 11 months old

I tamed him myself (he was parent raised). I followed every rule in the book to keep him safe

A couple weeks ago, something didn't seem right, his poop was a bit watery and I just had a feeling, but couldnt actually pin point anything
The vet appointment was supposed to be tomorrow.

yesterday I woke up and saw him at the bottom of the cage, trying to climb back up but he couldn't. He was so weak. It came out of the blue, it was so sudden. The night before he seemed fine, if a bit tired looking. He let my and boyfriend stroke him for the first time ever, i thought our bond was just getting closer

Whilst on the way to the vet he died in my partners arms

I am absolutely devastated. I've never grieved the loss of a pet before. I don't know how to handle it.

Does anyone have any advice for coping? I keep blaming myself for not seeing that something was wrong with him the night before

I just want him back

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a pineapple conure who was just 1.5 years old. She died this past Christmas day. For two weeks before she had been showing symptoms of lethargy, weakness and stumbling behaviour, unable to feed herself or fly properly. It just came out of the blue. One day she was healthy and happy, the next day she could barely function. We brought her to a vet and tried medication, but nothing worked. I am still so devastated so I know how you feel. But it's not your fault. You did all that you could. I am trying to stop beating myself up for my baby bird's death as well but it's hard not to feel guilty. I've lost 2 birds now traumatically and it's difficult. Time will heal though.