How to become the "chosen" one


New member
Apr 7, 2020
East Coast of Australia
Cockatiels and an African Grey
I have just adopted my first African grey he is 4 months old. I was very careful to meet many different birds and meet them with my partner. All of these birds seemed to prefer my boyfriend even though he did not have much to do with them.
Finally I found one that was a male and had been raised by a female human. I figured this was my best chance of having my African grey choose me as his preferred human. It has been my dream bird since I read Alex and me 12 years ago a decade before I even met my partner.
I knew this would be something that can potentially happen with any parrot however it's really disheartening to see Gaston preferring the company of my partner already even though I am the only one providing treats and extra training. Perhaps I am giving him too much attention and my partner is not giving him enough.
Are there any tips and tricks that can maximise my chances of becoming the preferred human while I still have a chance and he is young. Or am I just doomed to never have an African Grey choose me as he has already chosen? It's also disheartening as African grey parrots are extremely expensive in Australia and I feel like I have saved for a long time to give my boyfriend a bird :02: :smile040:
I am getting conflicting answers based on different threads on these forums. Some seem to say that my boyfriend ignoring the bird would be better to prevent unwanted behaviours and something to think that he should give the bird more attention as ignoring will make the bird want him more. I am unsure of how to continue and it is stressing me out which I don't want to stress the bird out and make him hate me even more. At this stage my boyfriend has been giving the bird as little attention as is humanly possible and I have been the one giving it all the attention. I'm worried that perhaps Gaston sees me as "work" and not fun

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