I accidentally killed my baby conure

MomofPele

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Oct 9, 2021
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I am sharing this so other new conure mom or dads don’t do the same.

I had a baby conure who was 10 months old his name was Pelé, I loved him so much he was my little baby. He was So playful and loved to cuddle. Whenever I would shower he would climb on top of the glass door and sit there and sing, we played so many games together along him, my husband and daughter. He brought so much joy to our lives, I had no idea one could love a little bird so much. I had read when I first bought him not to sleep with them because you can crush them so I would always let him cuddle and fall asleep and then move him to the cage as soon as he was asleep or if I was about to fall asleep.
I was conscious of this every night before bed, but unfortunately last night I fell asleep before moving him and woke up in the middle of the night to the most horrible sight. I had crushed my baby. I can not get over this. I really hope he didnt suffer. It’s so painful to know you are responsible for ending his little life, and could have avoided it. He had such a long life ahead of him and I loved him so much. This really hurts, I can’t get over the fact that I hurt him. I miss him so much already.

I also would like to tell everyone that I think breeders are not responsible enough when selling you pets. They gave us zero information on what to feed him, what to avoid, how to play and stimulate them etc. I knew because I decided to read about it but I think something should be done as I’m sure many new parrot parents make many mistakes that could be avoidable. And they should specially emphasize on not letting them sleep with you. We all feel guilty and want to cuddle but it can have a tragic ending like mine. I will never forgive myself for this. Please parrot parents don’t let this happen to you
 
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LaManuka

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Welcome to the Forums, MomofPele, but I am so sorry for the terribly distressing circumstances that have brought you here. Please accept my deepest condolences for the passing of your precious Pelé. Accidents like these are particularly devastating and can happen to even the most vigilant parronts in an unguarded moment.

Many of us have lost, or almost lost, parrots due to accidental causes. I've lost count of the number of times I've almost sat on my tiny lorikeet or caught her in a door because she moves so very fast - I think the coast is clear and suddenly she's exactly where I don't want her to be in the blink of an eye!

Sending healing thoughts and feathered hugs to you, I am so very sorry for your loss.

Godspeed to the Rainbow Bridge, sweet little Pelé, until we all meet again.
 
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MomofPele

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Welcome to the Forums, MomofPele, but I am so sorry for the terribly distressing circumstances that have brought you here. Please accept my deepest condolences for the passing of your precious Pelé. Accidents like these are particularly devastating and can happen to even the most vigilant parronts in an unguarded moment.

Many of us have lost, or almost lost, parrots due to accidental causes. I've lost count of the number of times I've almost sat on my tiny lorikeet or caught her in a door because she moves so very fast - I think the coast is clear and suddenly she's exactly where I don't want her to be in the blink of an eye!

Sending healing thoughts and feathered hugs to you, I am so very sorry for your loss.

Godspeed to the Rainbow Bridge, sweet little Pelé, until we all meet again.
Welcome to the Forums, MomofPele, but I am so sorry for the terribly distressing circumstances that have brought you here. Please accept my deepest condolences for the passing of your precious Pelé. Accidents like these are particularly devastating and can happen to even the most vigilant parronts in an unguarded moment.

Many of us have lost, or almost lost, parrots due to accidental causes. I've lost count of the number of times I've almost sat on my tiny lorikeet or caught her in a door because she moves so very fast - I think the coast is clear and suddenly she's exactly where I don't want her to be in the blink of an eye!

Sending healing thoughts and feathered hugs to you, I am so very sorry for your loss.

Godspeed to the Rainbow Bridge, sweet little Pelé, until we all meet again.
Thank you for your kind message, I’m heartbroken. I feel so bad my poor little baby 😔
 

Rozalka

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I'm so sorry for your loss:cry:
I don't know if it will make you feel a bit better (I know, such accident is hard to forgive yourself), but it isn't the first case of such accident. I am a moderator of a Facebook conure group and there have been few similar accidents - people were going to sleep with own fids and after waking up they realized their fids passed away... In one case the owner was aware it could finish terrible - she was letting her fid to sleep with her son and after the child fell asleep and then she was taking away the conure... until one day when she was sick and forgot to take her fid (I think I don't have to finish the story, because it has the same end as your)
Thank you for sharing the sad story - we all learn on own and other people's mistakes. Anyway remember some accidents aren't predictable - sometimes even a glass full of water may be deadly (yeah, I know such accident - somebody's fid decided to take a bath there...)
 

LaManuka

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Thank you for your kind message, I’m heartbroken. I feel so bad my poor little baby 😔

You're more than welcome, MomofPele. I myself found this forum following the utterly heartbreaking premature loss of a green cheeked conure due to a sudden illness, and it was the warmth and kindness of this community that helped get me through it. It's clear how much you loved Pelé and would not ever have deliberately harmed him, and I think you are very brave to write of your tragic experience in an effort to warn others.

Allow yourself to grieve, and please try not to beat yourself up, although I know from personal experience how very hard that is to do. Many people who have not had the rare privilege of loving these magical creatures do not understand the depths of grief that follows their loss, but this community does, and we are here for you.
 

wrench13

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We are all human and humans are imperfect creatures, every one of us. Please accept my humble condolences on Pete's passing, and also my admiration for coming forward with this story in the hopes of preventing a similar instance in others. That takes guts. THis was an accident, not some malicious action, and accidents always come with hindsight that can be very painful to think about (also a very human trait).

If and when you get another parrot, remember that each bird is it's own personality; don't expect him to be another Pete; some folks will get the same species (like another sun conure) and expect the new bird to behave exactly like the previous one.

Again, my condolences on Pete.
 

Terry57

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I am so very sorry for your loss of Pele. Thank you so much for sharing what happened to help others to prevent it happening to them. This is such a loving legacy for Pele.
Sending hugs of comfort to you.
 

Scott

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RIP Gandalf and Big Bird, you are missed.
My deepest condolences for your loss of beloved Pelé. I hope in time his precious memories evoke more comfort than despair and grief.

Breeders absolutely complicit with failure to reasonably educate parronts. Very little knowledge of parrot husbandry transfers from association with dogs or cats. My fervent hope is feathered children will one day come with comprehensive manual aiding longevity.

Thank you for sharing Pelé's story, may help others avoid similar tragedy.
 
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MomofPele

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The pain is too hard to deal with. I miss him so much!!!! :((( How have other people survived the guilt and pain of this situation? Please let me know
 

LaManuka

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I'm so very sorry for your pain, MomofPele. This type of loss of one so young in such devastating circumstances is very difficult to bear, so it is should be no surprise that you are still in so much distress. It might be worth your contact your a trusted veterinary clinic or animal shelter near you, they may be able to recommend a grief counselling service that may be of some assistance to you at this very difficult time.

Some of us struggle very much after a premature loss such as this, but it is completely normal and to be expected! You should not feel the need to just “get over it”, nor feel any pressure from anyone else to do so. The grieving process following a tragic accident like this will be uneven and it will take time. I went through some very dark times following the loss of my baby Baci the green cheek, and ultimately I approached my doctor for help, who thankfully was very sympathetic and helpful to me. Perhaps you might consider doing the same.

Above all else, remember that your baby Pelé loved you. He knows how much you loved him and that you still do, that it was an accident, and he would not want you to punish yourself over this. It will get less painful with time, even though it doesn't feel to you like it ever will right now. In the meantime I'm sending love and healing thoughts to you. Please know that the community here will listen to you, support you and share with you for as long as you need.
 

LittleWren

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Hello,
I'm so sorry to read about your beloved little bird. It's hard to lose one, especially to an accident.

The fact you did all the research you could, and are so distressed at losing him, shows you were a good parront.

Please don't hurt yourself with the "what ifs".

It will hurt less after awhile, but you're always going to remember him and you're always going to think about him. He will live on in your heart and in your memories. He will live on as you spread your story to other parronts.

It's important to remember that Pelé loved you, and in his short life you gave him a better life than thousands of birds. You gave him more love than thousands of birds have ever known.
 

Scott

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RIP Gandalf and Big Bird, you are missed.
The pain is too hard to deal with. I miss him so much!!!! :((( How have other people survived the guilt and pain of this situation? Please let me know
I well know your pain, honestly the best way forward is loving support of friends, family, and time. Grief is a meandering process with peaks and valleys of emotions. Please don't set expectations or compare yourself with others in similar circumstances. A dear friend shared attached poem in time of need, hope you find solace. We are here for you, visit often and let us know how you are doing.
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AvianGuy

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Sorry for your loss. My greatest fear is losing one off my fids (feathered kids). My 16YO male Ekkie is my best friend. No lie. my fids are more than a "pet". They are Family. I go to extremes for his and the other fids under my care. Extremes. Just like i would for any of my children. Psittacines (Parrots) are delicate creatures. Unlike other species. I know that all bird species have extremely sensitive air sacs not lungs. That is why there are certain holds that vet's use so they don't put pressure on the birds chest area. The tragic accident was totally avoidable. Once again, sorry for your loss, and the worlds loss of a beautiful parrot. Please don't get another.

 

foxgloveparrot

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The pain is too hard to deal with. I miss him so much!!!! :((( How have other people survived the guilt and pain of this situation? Please let me know
How to get over the loss of a bird? You might never. I can barely survive the pain of losing my beloved Nutmeg and Dash, even though they were a few years ago. Pele meant so much to you, it might be impossible to move on from losing him. Try to remember him, but in a positive light. Remind yourself that you are lucky to have had such a wonderful bird for any time at all, instead of that he could be with you for so much longer. And don't hate yourself, you seem like a great person and it was an accident. Hugs to you
 

foxgloveparrot

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"Death ends a life, not a relationship."
"A pet is never truly forgotten until it is no longer remembered.
"There is no death, only a change of worlds."
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
"What we have once enjoyed we can never lose; all that we love deeply, becomes a part of us."
"Pets bring us happiness that lives in out hearts forever."
"It is no coincidence that both birds and angels have wings."
 

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