My lovely lovebird passed away suddenly...Needs help

smarta

New member
Sep 27, 2018
6
13
Iowa and Florida
Parrots
Two Citron toos and one pearl cockatiel
I should also add – please don't blame yourself. And please know that it is absolutely normal to be questioning the "what ifs" but, as I am learning now, birds are very delicate and sometimes these things are beyond our control. When I was questioning the what if what ifs, my doctor said: "this is your mind trying to play tricks on you. It's because your mind wants to take control of the situation." Sometimes there really is nothing we could do. At some point, we will both understand this – I am still in the process myself. Sending you love and strength through this very trying time.
Well stated.
 

Farnoosh

Member
Aug 7, 2020
56
80
Vancouver, BC
Parrots
Paisley, pineapple green cheek born February 12, 2021, and
Daisy the most beautiful Pineapple green cheek, currently flying in paradise RIP February 2, 2020 – August 14, 2021
Hi Farnoosh,

I'm truly sorry for your loss. It's certainly not easy to see them go.
Your Daisy must have been a wonderful fellow to you.

Thanks for your useful suggestion, I truly appreciate it.
Yes, I have thought about necroscopy, but I've decided to drop this idea.
Mostly it's because that avian specialist is not only specialising in avian, but they are also occupied with other small animals.

I once went to a really respectable avian specialist in my city, and he has quite a few high-tech equipment, but he just didn't check my sick birds well, and just told me that I should feed them more medicine. All the birds I took to that avian specialist died, maybe it's by chance. But somehow, I just don't feel comfortable enough to pass my babies to him. He might be very skillful, but I really see no compassion in his eye. I'm sure that he does a good job of what is specialising at, but I think being a doctor/nurse/ any compassionate jobs, you need to have a bit more than professional skills...I don't know, maybe I'm asking too much

Of course, I understand for every mistake you make, you try to fix it and make sure it doesn't happen again. I'm just being very careful with their food, fruits and their hygiene in general, and I want them to have fun and enjoy the world.

To be honest, sometimes I'm afraid to take my birds to see the doctor. I'm aware of the fact that they are extremely delicate, and any misuse of medicine can just kill them in an blink of eye. I've taken many birds to the doctor, and they didn't survive a day after the visit. I wonder at times if I actually trigger their death? I know there's no answer to that...but I just try to process this and like you said...learning to embrace it.

On a side note, may I know why a Fungus was developing in her body? I'm just curious about this. Only If you don't mind sharing this with us here.

Thank you, and lots of love and big cuddle to you, may your beautiful Daisy rest in peace x :white1::greenyellow:
hello dear and thank you so much for your wonderful response and your kind words about my beautiful Daisy. To answer your question about her, I still don't know much details about the type of fungus she had and how it happened, I am waiting for her doctor to get back to me as this discovery was quite recent and the doctor at the hospital is very busy – unfortunately – which is part of the problem when it comes to this particular bird hospital. I know what you mean about not liking the idea of taking them to the doctor – I feel the same way. Also I worry about the viruses that maybe other birds have that she might catch if she is in close proximity to them (I think the more I know about bird diseases, the more I worry LOL). Again I am very sorry about your loss and my heart feels your pain. Forgiving ourselves for any little thing we may have done or not done (and it is not humanly possible to be perfect 100% of the time) to cause our beloved delicate beings illness, is so hard! But we must keep ourselves strong for the other birds who come into our lives that need our love and attention.
Every time I read a post like yours, I gain hope for humanity and the depth of the human heart.
I wish you all the best in taking care of your other beautiful birds. Yes, all you can do is your best with hygiene and everything else – and I'm sure you are doing a wonderful job! I will post again at some point when I have more information about Daisy because part of the reason I did the investigation was to help everyone else when it comes to learning about our delicate birds, which everybody is to learning more about.
Take care.
 
OP
Mustikka

Mustikka

Member
Sep 26, 2021
12
25
Parrots
Lovebird (Ms. boss)
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  • #23
I recently lost my favorite bird. She was killed by a barrier that I had put up to keep her safe. It was in place for 8 years with no incident. But somehow she knocked it over and was killed by it. I know you are feeling a lot of pain but please don't blame yourself or continue to figure out what happened. I'm also sorry that the nurse was so rude. I'm a nurse myself and it makes me sad that someone who is supposed to be compassionate and caring seems to be lacking in those traits. You are not alone. Looks like you came to the right place.
Hi Smarta,

Thanks for your kind message. Sorry it took me some time to reply, it's not easy for me to check this forum without tears. So I tend to check when I'm kind of ready for it.

I totally feel you, the barrier that you put up to keep her safe had a rather tragic end. This is what I thought when I bring my bird to the vet. I have this love and hate feeling toward seeing the vet. Please don't get me wrong, I totally respect vet's professions and skill. It's me that knowing if a bird's condition is so bad that need vet's attention, the bird's chance of surviving it...is relatively low.

I'm truly sorry for your lost, may your angel rest in peace

The nurse's reaction did shock me, but I know this is a single incident only. I've met some lovely nurses who have helped me and my family at difficult times. I guess I just didn't meet a good one with somebody laughing at your loss. Perhaps they don't know how to love animals like us.

Again, thank you and it's a privilege to be here. :white1::rainbow1::greenyellow:
 
OP
Mustikka

Mustikka

Member
Sep 26, 2021
12
25
Parrots
Lovebird (Ms. boss)
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  • Thread starter
  • #24
You are more than welcome, Mustikka. Like you, I found this forum having experienced a sudden and devastating loss, and it was the compassion, warmth and understanding that I found among this community that helped me get through it. I hope that you find the same comfort here, and that one day the memories of Newbee's mischievous ways will bring you more smiles than tears. Sending love to you, and to Ms.boss too :) ❤️

LaManuka,


You are absolutely right. To be honest, I find it a bit difficult to deal with Newbee's death.

Even though it's been a couple of weeks already, and I really hope I can think of her happily later in time.

I can't thank you enough when I was so desperate to get an answer for her death...and I found people of my kind here.

It's hard to find a closure but I'm genuinely learning from here. Thank you,
 
OP
Mustikka

Mustikka

Member
Sep 26, 2021
12
25
Parrots
Lovebird (Ms. boss)
  • Thread Starter
  • Thread starter
  • #25
hello dear and thank you so much for your wonderful response and your kind words about my beautiful Daisy. To answer your question about her, I still don't know much details about the type of fungus she had and how it happened, I am waiting for her doctor to get back to me as this discovery was quite recent and the doctor at the hospital is very busy – unfortunately – which is part of the problem when it comes to this particular bird hospital. I know what you mean about not liking the idea of taking them to the doctor – I feel the same way. Also I worry about the viruses that maybe other birds have that she might catch if she is in close proximity to them (I think the more I know about bird diseases, the more I worry LOL). Again I am very sorry about your loss and my heart feels your pain. Forgiving ourselves for any little thing we may have done or not done (and it is not humanly possible to be perfect 100% of the time) to cause our beloved delicate beings illness, is so hard! But we must keep ourselves strong for the other birds who come into our lives that need our love and attention.
Every time I read a post like yours, I gain hope for humanity and the depth of the human heart.
I wish you all the best in taking care of your other beautiful birds. Yes, all you can do is your best with hygiene and everything else – and I'm sure you are doing a wonderful job! I will post again at some point when I have more information about Daisy because part of the reason I did the investigation was to help everyone else when it comes to learning about our delicate birds, which everybody is to learning more about.
Take care.

Hi Farnoosh,

Thanks for your kind reply. I'm terribly sorry to reply you so late.

Actually, I re-read your message several times, it always made me cry. So I didn't really get a chance to write my reply till now.

I hope the doctor can check the exact cause for the fungus, and I hope it can bring you a closure with Daisy.

Forgiving ourselves is a lesson that we must learn. In my case, it's my own guilt. I wish I spent more time with her, but I'm just trying to think of with happy memories.

Only if you ever lost, you know the feeling that hits right into your chest.

I am better now, but whenever I read a post like yours, I burst into tears. We are all human beings, and I trust that we did what's best for that very moment.

My other bird, Ms. Boss is not young. She enjoys rubs on her head, and very selfishly I just want her to be around as long as she can. I would like to introduce her to people here when I feel ready. She's a cute lady!

Again, thank you for your loving words. May your Daisy rest in peace, and please take care x
 

Farnoosh

Member
Aug 7, 2020
56
80
Vancouver, BC
Parrots
Paisley, pineapple green cheek born February 12, 2021, and
Daisy the most beautiful Pineapple green cheek, currently flying in paradise RIP February 2, 2020 – August 14, 2021
Hi Farnoosh,

Thanks for your kind reply. I'm terribly sorry to reply you so late.

Actually, I re-read your message several times, it always made me cry. So I didn't really get a chance to write my reply till now.

I hope the doctor can check the exact cause for the fungus, and I hope it can bring you a closure with Daisy.

Forgiving ourselves is a lesson that we must learn. In my case, it's my own guilt. I wish I spent more time with her, but I'm just trying to think of with happy memories.

Only if you ever lost, you know the feeling that hits right into your chest.

I am better now, but whenever I read a post like yours, I burst into tears. We are all human beings, and I trust that we did what's best for that very moment.

My other bird, Ms. Boss is not young. She enjoys rubs on her head, and very selfishly I just want her to be around as long as she can. I would like to introduce her to people here when I feel ready. She's a cute lady!

Again, thank you for your loving words. May your Daisy rest in peace, and please take care x
hi dear Mustikka
I'm so sorry also for not replying to your earlier. Your message also made me cry. I think we can connect with each other's emotions on a deep level because we understand the pain. And the guilt. I also regret that I don't have more pictures of her. And I regret that sometimes I got annoyed with her when I didn't have patience . There is not a moment in the day that I don't miss her and that I don't think about her. We will get through this. I have been meaning to share more about her and the things I have learned, but I can't post about her without crying the whole time so I will have to wait. Here is a quote that I read the other day and it helped me:
"In the face of Death, what matters is what's still alive." pema Levi
take care dear (((hugs)))
 

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