Nasty quaker

Nebbles_92

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Aug 13, 2020
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I am writing to this forum for some help. My boyfriend has a quaker parrot and she is around 5 years old, he had her from a baby. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 2.5 years. When I first started visiting his house, the parrot (her name is Choco) was kept out of the cage. She was very friendly towards me and we had a good bond. One day out of the blur for no obvious reason, she took a dislike to me. I am unsure as to why. I have spend hours thinking of this and doing research. She started dive bombing me and made a small cut under my eye, she used to bite and scream. One day, we returned home from being out and she flew at my boyfriend just as he was flicking his headphone out of his ears and the headphone hot her in the head, she seemed very dazzled by this and temporarily was unable to fly. This only lasted a few minutes and she was fine again. We took her to the vets to get her checked out. We all came to the decision that for her own safety, she would need to remain in her cage. She has a huge stunning cage with lots of toys that we try to rotate but the trouble is, she is absolutely petrified of anything new in her cage. When anything new is introduced, she cowers in the corner of her cage. It got to the point I was unable to walk by her cage. She used to lunge and hiss and scream at me. It was so distressing that I avoided going downstairs unless I needed to. I prepared all my drinks and meals in the morning and placed them upstairs so I didn't have to walk by her. I also spend a lot of time out of the house. I have tried everything I can think of to try and win her over. I have tried tempting her with treats but she won't let me get close enough to give them. I spend hours trying to talk to her when I was in, I tried letting her out and she would just dive bomb me, that is why I made the decision to stay out of her way as I felt like I was distressing her. We have moved out of our house and into a flat. Her behaviour has got so much worse. She is constantly screaming. The noise has brought me to tears several times. I feel I am unable to be inside the flat due to the noise. I am worried about the neighbours too. She also tries to attack visitors we have in our home. This includes my boyfriends son. I have tries talking to him about her and he gets very defensive and lists all the reasons why her behaviour is my fault even though I have done so much research and tried everything I can think of. Any discussion about Chocos behaviour always ends in an argument and him threatening to get rid of her. I feel like it's getting to a point where I'm going to have to move out and we are going to have to live separate. I don't want him to get rid of her as I love her to bits. It won't be fair on her to rehome her and also I feel like my boyfriend will always hold it against me. I just cannot continue to be forced out of my own home. My boyfriend gets her out as much as he can but when she is put, she won't fly or get any exercise, she just sits on his shoulders and climbs on him. Please help. Thanks in advance.

The main problem is the noise. We have read that ignoring them is the way forward but she can go on for hours with us ignoring her. She gets rewarded with good behaviour.
 
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Laurasea

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Aug 2, 2018
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Welcome to the forum.
It breaks my heart to hear you call her nasty. I love Quaker’s very much, they are very very smart, intensely social, active and vocal and loud by nature.

A Quaker stuck in a cage all day no matter if it’s a large one , is 99% likely to start screaming, and then likely to pull out feathers and maybe start chewing on their feet and bodies .....

Until you meet the needs of her mind body and spirit, you aren’t likely to stop the screaming. Quaker’s aren’t likely to suffer unhappiness silently. And I completely understand the mind numbing noise can drive you nuts.

So the incident happened and she probably felt attacked, and frightened, and lost trust. Then her life had a lot of upheaval and changes and now she is stuck in a cage. And she is plunty unhappy. Hence the screaming and acting out.

Most parrots aren’t good at new things showing up in cages, new things have to be introduced slowly. I’m not sure if you are aware that Quaker are very territorial if their cage. Any intrusion is met with an attacking, and they lose their minds . ( young Quaker’s my nit display this till close to two years old) You really can’t train that out of them, yiu have respect the cage is theirs, and work around that. My Quaker’s are such loves and constantly want head scratching and kisses away from the cage. But when I first open the cage or touch the outside of the cage or stick my hand in the cage , the screech and lunge and bite.

Forget everything that has happened. Start over with her like she is a new bird yiu just brought home. Talk to her earn her trust. Tell her how fabulous she is. Set up perches in the outside of the cage , I also have one on the door so when it swings open they are out if the cage. You can set up a treat dish on the outside of the cage by an outside cage perch. Then when the house safe, let her come out if the cage in her own. Tell her how good she is and put a seed ( treat) in the treat dishe. Then sit in a chair a couple feet from the cage sideways and just talk to her, read texts out loud just spend time near her. Yiu should always grest her the same way, start talking to her as you come to the cage. Always great her when you get up, and when you come home, always tell her bye when you leave the house. Always explain to her what’s going on when she gets feed and water change.


You a soul can rebuild a relationship with her. I’ve done it with re homes and rescue birds. She needs to spend five hours a day out of the cage. She needs to be thought of as a human 4 year old. She needs to be included in your life, she needs social contact once you’ve built back trust. There is more to talk about but this is long post! Lol
 
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Nebbles_92

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Thank you so much for your advice. She spends a lot of time out of her cage when my boyfriend is home. She has perches and food bowls outside of her cage but she will not use them even when encouraged. He has spent hours trying to make these a safe space for her. She prefers to be on him.

I spend so much time with her but due to the fact she lunges and hisses at the cage even when I am across the room, I decided that giving her her own space is the best thing for her as I do not want to distress her in any way. She seems to hate my presence and the sound of my voice even more!

I am very aware of the fact that Quakers are very territorial. I try not to go near her cage, when I try to spend time with her and talk to her, it's always from a distance.
 

noodles123

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Jul 11, 2018
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Umbrella Cockatoo- 15? years old..I think?
Welcome , and hope you stick around! Lots of great advice on her, and good people!!!

3rd post down--- http://www.parrotforums.com/training/86854-my-parrot-keepsbiting-me.html

That post won't apply exactly to your situation, but you need to understand the hormonal and instinctual behavior that is going on here (along with lack of trust etc , coupled with possible anxiety etc). A parrot is not designed to live in a house-- they are wild animals (non-domesticated) unlike cats and dogs. You cannot just free them, BTW, but they are a commitment and they live for a long time. They can also be very non-nasty when you commit to understanding them and I am glad you are reaching out.. I just hope you keep in mind that none of this is technically the bird's fault.
 
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Nebbles_92

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Thank you! That really helped. I will look at doing that system with her. I do think she sees my boyfriend as a mate.
 
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Nebbles_92

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Sounds like you are the rivsl, but yiu can still have a friendship with her.
This is a good article just all around stress reduction
https://lafeber.com/pet-birds/stres...y eyes/face when she decides to dive bomb me.
 

Laurasea

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Aug 2, 2018
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Yiu really can have a friendship with her. Your boyfriend will still need to spend one on one time with her while yiu are out it in another room. You two need not be physically affectionate to each other in front of her ( at least fir now)

Yiu can also do a group “ date “ with her. I did this my conure sbd ny ex boyfriend, we got a big plate of fruit and popcorn set our selves up in the couch to watch a movie, I git my GCC in a nice happy mood and we all sat in the couch, I would have her step up to his finger fir just a second I kept my hand there so she couldn’t bite him , then had her step back to me sbd we gave her a piece of strawberries and told her how great she was, we repeated a bunch, let her run around between us and grab fruit herself. Passing the bird back and forth , other here call it passing the birdie . Anyway she felt so included and special. He always greeted her and gave her a treat and always says goodbye to her when he left and gave her a treat. She really grew to like him, he couldn’t pet her, but she would step up fir him and take treats nice. We couldn’t do any smooches tho or she would bite me lol

My rescue Quaker Penny will get mad sometimes if she has been in her cage and I’ve been out. When I first let her sometimes she flys at my face and screeches. Or if I have been petting my other birds she will march over and bite me. I have to make her feel special, and explain that everybody gets live but that she is still my good girl. She is silly to be mollified and jollied . She is very sweet and funny, but gets jealous

Bribe! Talk and explain, have your boyfriend reintroduce the two of you.
K I’m tired and I’ll try and think of ideas to help tomorrow
Glad you joined us
 

Laurasea

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This is a nice article, it talks about fear of new things, and development of fear of hands, especially with an accident ( like yours getting hit by the ear buds)
For dealing with the expressed negative behavior if screaming, first yiu have to deal with and fix the issues that led to this . This is often lack of mental and physical stimulation, lack of social contact, feeling left out the flock ( yiu guys are the flock) ,sexual frustration, Being stressed , teased, or harassed by other family members or pets..... observe, investigate, change and manipulate the environment and interaction. Have at least one corner or spot in the cage they can retreat to and be visual screened and feel safe, and that you never mess with.

https://blogpamelaclarkonline.com/2018/06/19/teaching-a-fearful-parrot-to-step-up/

https://blogpamelaclarkonline.com/

Also research foraging, and start teacher her how to do that. Read up on DIY toys, often we can make stuff cheaply that our birds enjoy more birds Than store bought. Birds like stuff they’ve can easily destroy, like if they take a bite it crunches , Rips beaks lol.

One of my birds likes to untie knots. I’ve used a long stick like perch and threaded hoops and other toys on it, they have to drag it down the perch before throwing it off. It’s a big hit and easy to do! One of my birds like little foot toys, so in the bottom of the cage I have a short cup full of plastic bottle caps and stuff for him to dig thro. I’ve cut up brown paper bag into a fringe like a Hulu skirt and hang it across the cage so they have to duck under, or get annoyed and rip up. Now my Rescue I had to teach and encourage and postive reward any interactions with toys, fir months before I had progressed. Get creative, pay attention to what floats your parrots boat. Teach, couch, cheerlead her exploration and playing with toys. It’s also ok to slightly annoy, like stick a carrot through the bars right next to her favorite perch spot, yiu bet she will get busy destroy it! I used zip ties and threaded some plastic discs and beads and hung them just past head night where. My Penny likes to sit, . At first yiu might want to wait on the annoying play stuff, tell she is more confident, or hang stuff outside the cage she can pull through, those shredders you weabve in bars are goid
 
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cneuhauser

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Jul 9, 2020
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Cary NC (hate it), LF Job in Moab UT or elsewhere
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Dusky Conure, Male Ekkie
Parrots are extremely intelligent, his parrot sees you as a rival. She's been in that household longer than you have, and you're in her territory. My Dusky has always been this way with my girlfriends (mistakes I made when she was a baby). However, both you and he can work towards changing the dynamics between all of you. Training helps a lot of the time, whether it be basics or trick training. The parrot is in hormonal mating mode... reinforce intellectual stimulation and learning mode... and eventually she will come around.

Your boyfriend should also work on changing his relationship with the bird... not just have you work with her.
 

Laurasea

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Aug 2, 2018
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This is great article, cover normal behavior then problem behavior
https://lafeber.com/pet-birds/bird-behavior/

https://birdsupplies.com/pages/understanding-parrot-behavior-problem-and-solutions


Excerpt from the link below
“ Isolation will create a louder parrot. Parrots want to be with the family flock. If you have your parrots in a “bird room” make sure they have enough time out of it and that this period is predictable for them. Parrots do best when they get at least three to four hours out of the cage each day, divided into two different periods of time. Less than that and you run the risk of living with a louder bird forever. There’s just only so much isolation and confinement that they can stand.”

https://blogpamelaclarkonline.com/2...olve-your-parrots-screaming-problem-for-good/

My parrot doesn’t play with toys. A great article!
https://blogpamelaclarkonline.com/2018/10/10/my-parrot-wont-play-with-toys/
 
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NewQuakerMom

Member
Apr 7, 2020
111
6
My quaker is also afraid of new things in his cage. I put it in the room, then the next day move it closer, and the next day move it closer, and so on and so forth, until it's hanging on the outside of the cage. I do that for a while and then move it into his cage in a far corner behind something else while he's out of the cage. And so on and so forth.
I want to agree with the person who said that your boyfriend should be working on this with you, not blaming it on you. This is no one's fault, I think.
Is there any chance that he is petting the bird all over while birdie is sitting on him? Or does he confine his petting to just birdie's head? Because if he's petting birdie on the back, etc he may be causing hormonal issues.
I'd try the just a little bit at a time thing. Where you come in the room, and he starts screaming, lunging, hissing, etc - you just sit down at the furthest edge of the room, and read or whatever. Birdie can't keep lunging forever - eventually he'll stop - and when he does, you leave. You're then reinforcing the behavior you want (him not lunging/hissing) instead of the other behavior. When he lunges/hisses and you leave, you're teaching him that if he wants you to leave, he can just lunge/hiss at you and you'll go.
Mine can be jollied out of a grumpy mood when I play music, or sing to him. Maybe your bf's birdie has something he likes like that?
I hope you figure something out - but agree, if you can't resolve your relationship with the birdie, you'll probably have more peace of mind if you live separately! It must be exhausting to be screamed at all the time. :(
 

FloridaParrotLover

New member
Dec 12, 2019
62
0
Central Florida
Welcome to the forum.
It breaks my heart to hear you call her nasty. I love Quaker’s very much, they are very very smart, intensely social, active and vocal and loud by nature.

A Quaker stuck in a cage all day no matter if it’s a large one , is 99% likely to start screaming, and then likely to pull out feathers and maybe start chewing on their feet and bodies .....

Until you meet the needs of her mind body and spirit, you aren’t likely to stop the screaming. Quaker’s aren’t likely to suffer unhappiness silently. And I completely understand the mind numbing noise can drive you nuts.

So the incident happened and she probably felt attacked, and frightened, and lost trust. Then her life had a lot of upheaval and changes and now she is stuck in a cage. And she is plunty unhappy. Hence the screaming and acting out.

Most parrots aren’t good at new things showing up in cages, new things have to be introduced slowly. I’m not sure if you are aware that Quaker are very territorial if their cage. Any intrusion is met with an attacking, and they lose their minds . ( young Quaker’s my nit display this till close to two years old) You really can’t train that out of them, yiu have respect the cage is theirs, and work around that. My Quaker’s are such loves and constantly want head scratching and kisses away from the cage. But when I first open the cage or touch the outside of the cage or stick my hand in the cage , the screech and lunge and bite.

Forget everything that has happened. Start over with her like she is a new bird yiu just brought home. Talk to her earn her trust. Tell her how fabulous she is. Set up perches in the outside of the cage , I also have one on the door so when it swings open they are out if the cage. You can set up a treat dish on the outside of the cage by an outside cage perch. Then when the house safe, let her come out if the cage in her own. Tell her how good she is and put a seed ( treat) in the treat dishe. Then sit in a chair a couple feet from the cage sideways and just talk to her, read texts out loud just spend time near her. Yiu should always grest her the same way, start talking to her as you come to the cage. Always great her when you get up, and when you come home, always tell her bye when you leave the house. Always explain to her what’s going on when she gets feed and water change.


You a soul can rebuild a relationship with her. I’ve done it with re homes and rescue birds. She needs to spend five hours a day out of the cage. She needs to be thought of as a human 4 year old. She needs to be included in your life, she needs social contact once you’ve built back trust. There is more to talk about but this is long post! Lol


Very well put. I love reading stuff like this. Thanks
 

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