Quaker forgave me after I apologized

[HeatherG]

My Quaker, Willow, would not let me pet him today when he was perched on his basket handle. He’s normally a very loving cuddly bird. He acted scared and opened his beak at me. I realized that he’d been affected by a bad encounter I had last night when he was on my shoulder. I live in an apartment building and there’s a community room. Someone went out of their way to steal my dinner and ransack/dump my art supplies when I was out of the room doing laundry for less than five minutes. I was mad and upset and used a loud angry voice to address the thief in a couple sentences.

I didn’t do something “wrong” but willow was still upset with me and scared the next day. He didn’t want me to pet him until I told him I was sorry and didn’t mean to scare him and I love him. I really meant it too! (My mom used to be a screamer and I would never want to make my birds feel scared like I was.) Then he was fine and wanted to be pet and kissed and snuggled for a long time. That was just an hour ago.

It made me remember that our parrots are watching and thinking and have feelings.
I was surprised that telling Willow i was sorry helped right away. I shouldn’t have been, but I was. My Lucy used to get mad at me and I’d apologize to her, but I thought she was really really smart. I should know better. Quaker parakeets are all very smart birds and they do get their feelings hurt, kind of like kids. I will be more mindful of anything I say when he’s with me in the future.

 

[Rival_of_the_Rickeybird]

Good story. Good thoughts.
You have a forgiving little sweetie there. Wives of the world should take a hint. KIDDING!!!
But seriously, very nice. Thanks for sharing.

 

[HeatherG]

Thank you for the kind thoughts.

Willow is a sweetheart and a beauty. I was so ashamed and sad that he was anxious, and I realized how much I treasure him today. I also realized that he is a very smart bird.

For me, the issue with apologies is that they need to be SINCERE. Birds and women can tell when someone doesn’t mean it or think it’s important. I really meant my apology to Willow and he knew it.

 

[fiddlejen]

I think this is true for All birds. Somehow they Know what an apology is. I guess something like that must be hard-wired into birds who are both highly social and also very easily offended.

 

[PyroParrot]

I have always apologized to my crew anytime i have done something. Accidentally step on the dog? ‘Oh! I am SO sorry! Bump the birdie when going in for a pet? Same! And then of course we have a conversation about it. I truly believe they understand that you are making amends

 

[HeatherG]

I have always apologized to my crew anytime i have done something. Accidentally step on the dog? ‘Oh! I am SO sorry! Bump the birdie when going in for a pet? Same! And then of course we have a conversation about it. I truly believe they understand that you are making amends

I’m always forgetting how long Willow’s tail is and bumping it when I raise my hand to pet him. Don’t know why I can’t learn that. Then I say I’m sorry, poor poor bird, and he eats it up.

Since I am so much bigger than him and when I bump his tail the whole bird moves, I think it’s a pretty big deal.

Lucy wanted to be held in my hand like a tiny human infant and it was easier not to ‘bop’ her tail, since it was pointed towards me. She liked having her feet rubbed and moisturized. Willow lets me touch his feet, which surprises me, but he keeps his toenails trimmed so I don’t have to clip them. Willow is not wild about going ‘upside down’ and since it seems to be a controlling thing I will not make him. He doesn’t have a sore leg. Then again he doesn’t get raspberries on his tummy either. (Although only a WEIRD bird would like that.).

I’m sure Lucy’s idea was that ANY ATTENTION IS GOOD ATTENTION. I heard she was a real brat at the vets when she stayed there for a couple of days.