Considering clipping my birds wings because of partner

[sofiaee]

Hey everyone!

So, I’ve had my birds for about 8 years I think, and my partner for about 6. He has always been pretty afraid of the birds after his first meeting with Oliver. Oliver flew around like crazy and also bit him.

We have all lived together now for the past few months and I notice I am getting the birds out less because I don’t want to freak my boyfriend out, he is genuinely scared of how erratic and uncontrollable a flighted bird can be.

My birds haven’t ever been clipped but im really considering it. I really like the idea of us being all together without issue or stress. I’d like to set up a play stand in the living room that they actually use instead of flying off it. I kind of think once oliver and my bf warm up to eachother more we might even be able to let the feathers grow back in. They just got off on the wrong foot imo...

Its mostly Oliver im concerned about because mia is not a strong flier. For her it honestly might be safer to have a small clip, she sometimes ends up in strange places if she ever gets spooked by a loud noise or something. She doesnt have the control that Oliver has.

All this to ask, has anyone else dealt with this before? How did it turn out?

Thank you so much for reading, I dont think i have been on the forum in years but it has always been so helpful <3

 

[itzjbean]

When I first got my cockatiels, they were (still are) prone to taking flight as soon as I let them out and with their cage in the living room they like to take a couple laps and then perch either on the curtain rod or on the play-stand on top of their cage.

We had some friends over for dinner one night and also had the birds out (in hindsight I probably should've put them away with guests over) and everything seemed fine, but afterwards we started hearing from this couple less and less. 6 months went by and my husband's sister (who we're close with) saw them out in a grocery store and asked them why they haven't been over at our house lately. They admitted to her that one of them was scared of birds.

They never mentioned this to us, the only way we found out about it was through my husband's sister. We still to this day don't communicate much, as they were going to just let our friendship end because of this without even discussing it with us I was pretty mad. They're having a baby and we sent them a baby shower gift but have not hung out with them much since that incident. I will continue to own birds and so let them be scared.

I'm sorry if this story is not a good one, lol, but it is going to be different with your boyfriend because you need it to work because he lives with you. Everyone should feel comfortable in their own house.

Having them in their own personal room may help, keeping them out of the hustle and bustle of the living room and taking flight. You could put in a curtain over the door so you could still access them easily but they can still be out of cages, yet confined to the one room so both boyfriend can live in peace and birds can be happy out of their cages.

 

[sofiaee]

That really sucks that your friendship went out that way, I’m so sorry, but thank you for your story!

The birds do actually have their own room but I would love to have them out in the rest of the house while I do other things like make tea, read, take care of the aquariums, be on the computer etc without it being a problem. My boyfriend will actually visit with them in the bird room when they are caged and he pets Mia through the bars. He really doesn’t trust Oliver though. Oliver has gotten along with a lot of my friends in the past, though it can be hit or miss. Im always nervous introducing him to others. Sometimes I’m shocked at how cuddly and sweet he is to complete strangers, sometimes he’s a bit more testy and nippy with people.

I honestly think my boyfriend also just has a super low pain tolerance haha, a pet that bites isn’t ideal to him. I don’t get bit often but of course it will happen on occasion.

 

[Rival_of_the_Rickeybird]

My wife has a 30+ year old conure who is flighted, mean, and hates me.

Our compromise has been that he stays flighted but comes out less frequently, on the premise that he enjoys his time out more with flight. Over time, we've discovered that he doesn't attack me if we obey his rules. The main rule is that we don't get too near each other, let alone touch.

Another thing. He has his own room, too, so when she has laptop work or other similar stuff, she goes in there and he comes out.

The Bird was around before I was, and as much as the missus loves him, well...................there you go.

Good luck.

 

[sofiaee]

My wife has a 30+ year old conure who is flighted, mean, and hates me.

Our compromise has been that he stays flighted but comes out less frequently, on the premise that he enjoys his time out more with flight. Over time, we've discovered that he doesn't attack me if we obey his rules. The main rule is that we don't get too near each other, let alone touch.

Another thing. He has his own room, too, so when she has laptop work or other similar stuff, she goes in there and he comes out.

The Bird was around before I was, and as much as the missus loves him, well...................there you go.

Good luck.

Personally that compromise does not sound good to me. I would like to see if there is another way. But I thank you for your input.

If Oliver is flighted and my partner doesnt have a change of heart about birds flying at him then they would not be able to be in the same room ever. I don’t even think Oliver is trying to attack him but that is how he has always visited people, as soon as he hears their voice he’s off. It actually made me kind of nervous when I lived with my parents because people had a habit of talking while standing at the door with it open..

I’ve been going through the archives on this forum this morning to try to find similar situations. I’m honestly leaning towards clipping right now based on what Ive read and my own situation. Oliver often climbs around and walks on the floor etc. he really enjoys my companionship but he has also enjoyed many other people so i wouldnt call him mean even though he can be stubborn. I’m thinking for him the benefits of being out more would outweigh the negatives. It is temporary so maybe worth a try.

I realize i sound like Ive made up my mind but Im still curious about peoples experiences. I think I’m nervous because I haven’t ever had a clipped bird. Im mostly afraid that Oliver will be confused and upset about it. Its too bad I can’t ask for his opinion.