Don't know what to do with aggressive conure

[Frog737373]

I made an account here because I've been having an ongoing issue and I need to speak to someone about it before I go crazy. My older brother got a green cheek conure, Souda, in around 2018? For the first few years we had him he was very friendly and sweet, if a bit bitey, but I've learned that you should expect that from birds. Lately, though, that's changed and he's become and extremely aggressive little sh*t and he honestly scares me. I'm the only one home 90% of the time, and I always want to let him out because I feel bad for him, but he gets extremely aggressive (chomping my ear and face HARD) and I can't deal with it so I put him back.

The issue arises in the fact that I don't want to have to be the one to bond with him or fix his behavior. He hates my mom, and my older brother who got him moved out last year and didn't take him with, so I'm just about the only person in the house who can spend time with him, but I don't want to. I don't want to be responsible for this 4 inch toddler for the next 40 years because my brother thought a bird would be cool. I feel so bad for the poor bastard bird but I honestly hate him. He's so mean and loud and i don't know what to do. Rehoming him is out of the question because there's no way my family would let go of him.

To summarize; I feel really bad for our bird who spends most of his day in his cage, but I don't like him and I don't want to be bonded to him or responsible for him. What do I do? Is there any advice I could give my mother to help fix her bond with the bird, since she likes him more? He hates her because she was holding him when I clipped his nails once and he's never forgiven her. Can it be helped?

 

[clark_conure]

in the search of this site look up the time out method.

It's very effective for bonded birds that then act out.

Good luck.

 

[LoveMyFids]

My best advice to you is to #1.) Have a serious talk w/your family telling them what is going on & how you feel about this. It shouldn't fall on your shoulders if you don't even want or like the bird. If they agree to rehoming, contact a parrot rescue & they can help you & most are really good at making sure a bird goes to a very good, loving home w/people who are totally willing to put in the work a bird needs. #2.) There is a possibility that the bird is hormonal now & this is often the main reason for aggressive behavior, along w/not enough sleep & a bad diet (ie. too much sugar, seeds, & junky foods eaten as opposed to healthy things). Just like in children, it can cause all kinds of mood problems, sleep problems, etc. IF it's any of these things, there are steps you can do to improve the behavior, but it takes effort, patience & consistency to do it, which you may not feel you have or want to commit to. That's not a "bad thing", it's just total honesty, as birds are a LOT of work & not everyone want that in their life, which is 100% understandable. That's why I think having a serious heart to heart honest talk w/your family should be the first thing to do.

 

[Frog737373]

T

My best advice to you is to #1.) Have a serious talk w/your family telling them what is going on & how you feel about this. It shouldn't fall on your shoulders if you don't even want or like the bird. If they agree to rehoming, contact a parrot rescue & they can help you & most are really good at making sure a bird goes to a very good, loving home w/people who are totally willing to put in the work a bird needs. #2.) There is a possibility that the bird is hormonal now & this is often the main reason for aggressive behavior, along w/not enough sleep & a bad diet (ie. too much sugar, seeds, & junky foods eaten as opposed to healthy things). Just like in children, it can cause all kinds of mood problems, sleep problems, etc. IF it's any of these things, there are steps you can do to improve the behavior, but it takes effort, patience & consistency to do it, which you may not feel you have or want to commit to. That's not a "bad thing", it's just total honesty, as birds are a LOT of work & not everyone want that in their life, which is 100% understandable. That's why I think having a serious heart to heart honest talk w/your family should be the first thing to do.

Thank you for this reply! I spoke to my mother about this and we decided that we should give him another chance and work on his behavior again before throwing the towel in, which I think is best. I'm going to do more research into parrot diets because his diet may be part of the problem too. Hopefully we can calm the green toddler this time.

 

[wrench13]

My friend, most of what LoveMyFids posted is spot on, if put a tad bluntly. Not an easy thing to discuss. If you stick around for a while, you'll even see some of us folks actually try to convince a new member to wait on getting a parrot until they are better situated or established in their life. Parrot ownership is that demanding.

So the 'time out' or "Shunning" method of discouraging biting does work and works well, if applied properly. Doing it is easy. As soon as the bite occurs, the bird is placed IMMEDIATELY on a handy chair back or other neutral spot -Not the cage! Turn your back and totally ignore him for 1 minute, no more, no less. Totally ignore, no chatting about or to him. Then reengage with the parrot - rinse and repeat.

The trick is determining when to use it. Bites that occur because you were not paying attention to body language, or because you were interrupting eating, playing, mating, bathing or anything else preoccupying him or because he is just feeling grouchy, or as you mentioned, a diet with excessive amounts of high energy foods and no place to expend that energy - these bites are NOT HIS FAULT and using shunning in those instances would be inappropriate and more likely to result in more bites. A good yardstick to use in making your decision is to repeat "It is never the fault of the Parrot; it is always the fault of the Human" and see if the bite measures up to that.

Bites that occur during known hormone season should not be addressed using Shunning, as they have little to no control over their behavior or actions during these periods. Sounds like being overly indulging, but they literally go from Dr. Jakyle to Mr. Hyde and back in seconds, and be all "What the F was that ???".

Shunning DOES work, its how parrots in the wild discipline unruly behavior within the flock. But it has to take place every time and it must be done immediately. By everyone!

I agree with LoveMyFids in that if you aren't willing to put the effort into raising and keeping this parrot as he should be, the best course of action for the parrots well being is to re-home him to a good home. Not easy to admit that publicly and I commend your bravery and self honestly. Not many would do that even on anonymous web message board.

 

[LoveMyFids]

T

Thank you for this reply! I spoke to my mother about this and we decided that we should give him another chance and work on his behavior again before throwing the towel in, which I think is best. I'm going to do more research into parrot diets because his diet may be part of the problem too. Hopefully we can calm the green toddler this time.

I'm so glad that you talked to your mom about this & have decided to try to work with him again before making any further decisions. This is wonderful & if you both work together on it, the better. It will take a lot of patience on both of your parts, so be prepared for that, & be prepared to feel overwhelmed some days, frustrated, annoyed & maybe even mad at times. It's all normal to feel these things & it doesn't mean you're a bad person for feeling any of those emotions. Point blank, humans aren't birds & we're really not naturally equipped to communicate "bird language". All we know is just the human version of how to try to, & when you think about that, it's really no wonder why miscommunication is so easy! You really can't blame a bird for not understanding. With patience & consistence, his behavior should at least improve over time, but don't get discouraged if it's not right away. It can take months. A better diet will help, as will 12-13hrs. of sleep in a dark room w/blackout shades or a blackout cover over the cage at night. I've found more sleep really makes a difference pretty quickly overall, but they need to really get it-not just be covered in a high traffic room w/the tv on, etc. A separate room is best if possible. If you don't have a blackout cage cover, Amazon has quite a few. I just bought one for like $22. Just measure the cage & choose one a couple inches larger. Good sleep consistently can greatly improve aggressive & cranky behavior overall, & often you'll see some positive results with that in a week. I'm proud of you for stepping up for the bird, for getting on here to ask for help & for talking to your mom about it & WANTING to learn more info. It shows great character & that you actually CARE, so I applaud you for that! You can always ask questions on here too, as there are a bunch of longtime bird owners who no doubt have great advice to give! I've got my fingers crossed for you!

 

[Beepers]

Wear an oversized hoodie. Put the hood up, pull the sleeves over your hands. Let the bird out and allow him to bond with you. Don’t touch him unless he has his head down, for a head scratch. If he tries to bite, move your hands away. Keep a favorite toy handy as a deterrent if he gets nippy. Millet can be used for positive reinforcement. As you know, conures tend to be nippy. If he gets too aggressive, put him back in his cage. Use a chopstick or a perch to take him in and out if you need to. Don’t grab him unless you absolutely need to. Always better to let a bird think it’s their idea.