Possibly getting an Amazon

[Billdore]

I'm not sure if the timing is right, for me now but I have a friend who needs a good home for his Amazon. He has recently had a baby and now his Amazon Perry has gotten aggressive with his wife. We had gotten our parrots about the same time so I have known of Perry but have never met him yet. My friend who has been following along with my terrible ordeal of my search to find my missing baby girl Timneh. I thought I was going to be able to get through this visit to see you guys without crying but suddenly I feel so overwhelmed again. Timneh is always in my thoughts. What are your thoughts guys bad timing and wait or should I seriously start thinking about adopting Perry? He is a yellow crowned Amazon.

 

[Jen5200]

Well it is good to see you, and I’m so sorry to hear that Timneh is still missing - hugs from me and my flock. I still hold onto a thread of hope that Timneh will find her way home, but I know that it is hard to know how long to wait as well.

In my opinion - it can’t hurt to meet Perry and take it from there. You may connect with him, you may not - you won’t know if it’s too soon until you get there. Let your friend know that you are not sure how ready you are, and make no commitments until you feel okay with it. You have so much to offer a bird, but only you will know when the time is right. We’ll support you in whatever is the best decision for you.

 

[Smerft85]

Well, I guess you could say our Amazon wouldn't have made it home without my approval first, I knew beforehand that he didn't care for men, was guaranteed to be bitten if I push too hard with him, and that my wife was head over heals for him.

The only birds I've lost were when I was young and my biological father traded my pair of cockatiels for drugs, and I waited over 20 years always wanting that bond again.

A question to ask yourself, with your heart hurting, can you love him to your full potential without "comparing" the two? I am guilty of it with my dogs, I was always trying to expect higher standards because my first dog was insanely loyal and amazingly smart, and I was unfair to the next one expecting the same things out of a different dog.

If you believe taking in a new bird will help you heal, and you expect everything to be different, I'd encourage you to meet the bird at least, see if you two click with one another, never know, could be perfect! Even our Amazon has started accepting me in less than two weeks, but he is still mommas boy.

 

[wrench13]

I agree - go meet him and see if you click together.

Very sorry that Timneh is still missing. I think you should lower your expectation that he will still come back . Miracles do happen, but you cant spend your life waiting for one. I know how you feel, I lost a parrot when I was in my 30's.

 

[bill_e]

When my Amazon of 39 years died, I wasn't going to get another. A month passed and I was really missing the companionship so I began to look. I found Nike and took her home about 2-1/2 months after my OWA, Berta passed and I don't regret it for a second. If you're like me you will bond very close with a new bird, go check him out.

 

[AmyMyBlueFront]

When my Amazon of 39 years died, I wasn't going to get another. A month passed and I was really missing the companionship so I began to look. I found Nike and took her home about 2-1/2 months after my OWA, Berta passed and I don't regret it for a second. If you're like me you will bond very close with a new bird, go check him out.

What everybody said! Go check him out! And so sorry to hear Timneh is still on the lamb


Jim

 

[Terry57]

Bill, I am so sorry that Timneh is still missing. I agree with everyone, I also think going to meet Perry may tell you whether the time is right. I'm so glad you are open to the thought of possibly bringing Perry home, and know your heart will tell you whether it is right for you and Perry to adopt each other right now. Wishing only the best for you, and still praying for Timneh's return.

 

[PickleMeDickles]

I'm so sorry Timneh is missing, your heart must be truly heavy. I agree with everyone, go and meet Perry. He too is going to have his life turned upside down when he is placed into a new home and if you two click you guys can hold each other up during this heartbreaking time!

 

[SailBoat]

I'm one of those who believe that while the love of our life is busy creating a space in our heart for them. They are also near as busy creating a space for another. Its a Parrot thing.

I'm also one of those who believe that Parrots quickly lock into our emotions. And, by doing so are open to a relationship even while losing the one they have. And, that is a very important thing to remember - this Amazon will be loosing its home.
So, when you meet Perry be very open to his emotions as well as he is not aware that his life is about to be turned upside down, yet again. And, this poor guy will not have a clue what is about to happen. He is still trying to figure out why is Lady no longer has time for him.

So, try visiting just to say hi! Use time to have him become comfortable with you from a distance and over an extended time, work to him, as he shows interest in you.
You and he will be best served by having this 'transfer' occur after several visits.
Sideline: Amazons do have the ability to Love the One they Love, and just as well, Love the one they are with.

 

[Scott]

I heartily endorse you meeting with Perry. Nothing will ever replace Timneh, but another parrot may bring you incredible pleasure and a measure of peace. Amazons are quite different from Greys; you'll quickly know if this species is suitable!

 

[Scott]

I'm one of those who believe that while the love of our life is busy creating a space in our heart for them. They are also near as busy creating a space for another. Its a Parrot thing.

I'm also one of those who believe that Parrots quickly lock into our emotions. And, by doing so are open to a relationship even while losing the one they have. And, that is a very important thing to remember - this Amazon will be loosing its home.
So, when you meet Perry be very open to his emotions as well as he is not aware that his life is about to be turned upside down, yet again. And, this poor guy will not have a clue what is about to happen. He is still trying to figure out why is Lady no longer has time for him.

So, try visiting just to say hi! Use time to have him become comfortable with you from a distance and over an extended time, work to him, as he shows interest in you.
You and he will be best served by having this 'transfer' occur after several visits.
Sideline: Amazons do have the ability to Love the One they Love, and just as well, Love the one they are with.

^^^^^ This, every single word! ^^^^^

 

[Tami2]

I also agree with what has been said. Especially, about moving slow over several visits and weeks. You two may not even be the right fit.
But, look at how just considering this already has your mind shifted to the positive. If nothing else, it will be a distraction from your grief, just for a little while. Even if this isn't a fit, it may get you motivated into looking at rescuing a grey. It might?

I'm going to share a story. Many years ago, I lost a young Lab to Lyme Disease. I cried for over a month. The only thing that picked me up was searching for another puppy. I knew I wasn't replacing him or disrespecting him in any way.
But, it was the first time I wasn't sobbing in grief.

I'm so glad you are posting and sharing this with your PF family. I look forward to hearing all about you future meet & greets with Perry. :heart:

 

[Anansi]

Wonderful advice already given, and I agree wholeheartedly.

Remember that opening your heart to the possibility of taking in another bird is not the same as giving up on Timneh. And it certainly isn't about replacing him. I feared it might feel that way when I got Jolly a few months after Bixby's passing, but I quickly found that each had found entirely different places in my heart.

So, go and meet this Amazon. See if there's a click. When you know, you know.

 

[Billdore]

Thank you everyone so much sorry I didn’t make it back sooner. I went and met Perry today poor fella seemed a bit on edge right when I walked in. It’s an emotional time for my friend and he wanted to just get it over with basically. I just went for it right away and received and decent chomp for my offering. I was ready for I knew it was a 90 percent chomp rate. I convince my friend that we should just hang out all together on this visit and see how we do. we hung out for 3 hours at first Perry wanted to chomp my feet so I got on the ground on hands and knees so he couldn’t get my feet and used my hands instead. I have him some space and lost track of Perry to my amusement he was standing in front of my defenseless foot just looking. He did this a few times and responded to my whistles. As I left Perry was no longer chasing my feet or ruffling his head dress at me. I’m super nervous but he’s beautiful and is super cuddly with my friend just like Timneh was with me. I’m most nervous that he will have trouble leaving his home especially after seeing the way he was acting with my friend. he will have a prime setup two nice cages 3 play stands. couple travel cages. He’s quite a bit bigger than Timneh but his beak is about the same size. He could of gotten me worse than he did today also. His beak is slightly askew on one side kind of over grown. His diet isn’t awful but I can improve it. Also my friend says he doesn’t fly except for short distances and I can see why. It’s not awful barbering butPerry has taken and chewed of the tips of some of his flight feathers basically clipping his own wings. So he always walks around everywhere so I will have to be extra vigilant with my almost 14 year old blind almost deaf Puggle Bella. Timneh flew everywhere and never wanted to be on the ground. they kept their distance from each other Bella actively avoided Timneh but her hearing has gotten worse these last couple of months. Also Perry doesn’t seem food driven at all. I’m thinking I just need to find what he really loves. They have tried quite a wide variety of stuff though. When my friend picked Perry up he was given as many salted peanuts as he wanted. So it’s tough to top that treat. My friend is really hoping that he can start bringing Perry’s stuff over on Friday and Perry also. He’s getting ready to move and the heat is shut off in his place and his wife and baby are staying at her parents at night cause it’s getting chilly, and emotionally it’s hard for them also. Thank you again everyone for your support. I want to take Perry in I’m hoping i can persuade my friend in a few more visits before we move Perry. Either way there will be an adjustment period for all of us. The advice and support from the community here is absolutely amazing. People pay hundreds and thousands of dollars for less valued advice and kind words.

 

[Billdore]

Sorry it’s such a rambling miss mash of words.

 

[noodles123]

I am happy for you. I know you have been dealing with a lot, but sometimes a crazy challenge is a great way to get your mind off of thing--I am an anxious person at times, and I love a good distraction. With all you have been through, I imagine life has been kind of stressful and that this will turn out well in the long-run. It is lucky that your friend has you around (has to be better than re-homing to a stranger).
You probably are in for a bumpy road initially, but you will get there in the end. Perry will be sad about the transition and I have no doubt that he will test your patience, but given time and consistency, I am sure he will soften and bond with you.

 

[Jottlebot]

It sounds like it went well. Sounds like he is struggling where he is though. Would you consider offering him a "foster" place rather than a definite new forever home? As you have said there are things you could improve for him and that in itself would be a positive. Then, even if he doesn't fall for you, he's out of a stressful house, has a better diet and you could help him find a forever home knowing you understand him and allowing the new owner plenty of time to meet him and bond? It also means you haven't given up on Timneh, you're just 'using the space for good' for a while longer. If you do fall for each other then brilliant ��

I wonder whether a better diet will improve his food motivation? I would be (very slightly) less inclined to put work into getting a takeaway if I knew I got chips and burgers most days, but if it's salad and vegetables for tea you can GUARANTEE I'm tidying my house if it'll get me a takeaway that night!!

 

[Flboy]

Sorry it’s such a rambling miss mash of words.

Expected! You are in a miss mash point of your life!

 

[Jen5200]

I’m happy that you went to meet Perry - it sounds like you are already thinking of ways that you can help to improve his life and that you have reasonable expectations for some rockiness during and after transition. You have lots of amazon people to help you, and the rest of us are here for moral support

 

[Billdore]

so Perry is here he’s chilling out and we are listening to an audio book and watching a movie. He’s a sweet heart and is taking things very well knock on wood. we have just been talking so far.