The Bane of All Trainers; Excuses

Although I am not a trainer, I never realized just how annoying excuses (and labels) are until today.

Late mid-morning, someones Scottish or Cairn Terrier got loose on the streets without a lease. Three people were chasing around this dog, trying to catch him... mean while, they are yelling at the dog, trying to tell the dog to stay put, etc. I even tried to help out because there was traffic moving along the street and the last thing anyone wanted was for the dog to get hit. He avoided me as well. I could tell by this that the dog was not trained to come on command when outside.

The most frustrating part of this? Once the dog was captured, I tried to give these people some advice on training. The guy's response was that "He's a brat" and "He's old" - as if that's an excuse as to why he can't be trained. One of the women replied as if she was paying attention and knew what I was saying, but it was clear that she really didn't care. Yes, she was happy that her dog was captured and not killed or injured, but she did not particularly care what I had to say. Of course, she tried to make it sound like she was really appreciative of my help... and how "awesome" I was for it... but it did not feel heart felt.



Rather than making excuses and labeling behaviors, people need to take responsibility for their animals behavior! Excuses include "he's training me", "he's trying to be the boss of me/trying to dominate me", "he's a brat", "he's hormonal", "that's just the way he is," etc. I see labels such as "aggression" and "dominance" used frequently, but is that really what's going on? I see many new people who get into birds, then have a bird they "can't train" because the bird is "aggressive". It bites. I ask them "Is it aggression? Or is it fear?" and I describe the differences between the two. They then come back and say "He's afraid". Once they understand the behavior, they are then capable of better understanding their bird and learning how to better work with them, rather than against them. It's kind of like a light bulb goes off in their head and then they are more patient and understanding.

Yes, I understand that there is also aggression in our pets, but that's an entirely different ballpark!



So stop with the excuses and labels and start communicating! Behavior serves a purpose. Labels and excuses serve no purpose in figuring out a behavior and how to deal with it. It's time to learn to understand your pets and teach them!


Behavior Serves A Purpose…
But What Does it Look Like? Using Observable Phenomena to Interpret Behavior and Solve Training Challenges
The Art of Training
Behavior Trained Through Consistency…A Win/Win Outcome for All
The ABCs of Behavior





-end rant-

I have my two large dogs trained, if they get out (still in the front yard area) I yell "Wanna go for a ride?" I get my car keys and unlock the car doors, they bolt to the car. Sadly I drag them back inside, because why do they get a reward for getting loose.

Now if 1 gets out and is down the street, its a mad dash to grab him/her. Normally still yelling "wanna go for a ride?" And opening the car door, they do come back. But I can also get away with walking up to him/her with the other dog and they are all excited because they see the leash.

I've trained all the dogs my house hold has ever had. Commands and the unpredictable escapes (Very rare.)

I should get a medal

Very good points Monica. I always find it sad/annoying when people call their dogs "brats" for not listening. You have to teach your dog to be the dog you want.

I never take my dog for a full walks without a leash. Sometimes when we're 5 houses away I'll take off my dogs leash and she gets to do the last bit off leash. My main concern is other dogs, sugar only weighs 6-8 pounds.

Ahh I hate that! Some members of my family and my boyfriend say that Oliver is a bad bird, that he's mean and wants to hurt people. I just can't understand, Oliver is the sweetest cuddliest little guy, at least to me, my sister, and a couple of my friends that he gets along with (they listened to my instructions). The only people that say this about him are the ones who don't want to put in the time to get him to trust them, give up after one little bite, or who don't try to pay attention to behavioral queues/research about interacting with parrots. I'm trying to socialize Oliver more but it's hard for me to find volunteers!

i agree. NO dog is a brat. they do exactly what you train them to. if the dog gets out and u chase after, it thinks its almost like a game of tag, so it runs away. if you keep chasing, the dog keeps running. then once you finally catch it, and then(what most people do) punish him/her, she thinks she/he is being punished for coming back or getting caught. so they run even more next time. now, there are a FEW "excuses" that actually arent excuses and are real reasons. my one dog is getting older(thats not my excuse haha) but in his old age, is starting to go deaf. so sometimes when we call he just doesnt hear. but my other dog comes every time she is outside and called, although she has never run away in the past 6 years.

Amen! I routinely have to politely tell people to stop handling my dog in a certain way. He is young but obedient as long as he is not antagonized into misbehavior, and my goal is to get him to the point where other people's actions do not influence his obedience. Some examples are that we are training him not to jump on people, put his teeth on people, bark to get his way, etc. He is very good about this until guests come over and start grabbing and slapping at his face in a "playful" manor, trying to get him to "wrestle" or "play." This confuses him because he knows what they want, but he knows what I want, which is opposite. He then gets very frustrated and worked up, and barks. When I explain this to people, most say some irritating version of "oh he is just a puppy!! You have to let him be a puppy!" I feel like screaming "HE WILL BE A BIG DOG SOON ENOUGH!! IT IS THAT ATTITUDE THAT LANDS SO MANY 9-12 MONTH OLD DOGS IN NEED OF NEW HOMES!!!" Ok, sorry for the yelling, but training puppies is important, unless you want to try it when they are full grown! My dog is also trained NEVER to go off of a curb unless he is on a leash and specifically told to accompany a human ("come" or "heel" or "get in the car"). Last week my neighbor's dog was hit by a car because he ran into the road. We are in a neighborhood where many dogs are off leash often, but mine does not run in the road. Would it be better to say "oh he is just a puppy! He can't possibly listen or learn!"? NO! Either train your animals or stick with fish, people. All that to say, I agree with you. And I know everyone has to start somewhere, but they really need to start.

Sadly, some people don't understand. It's like they are too "black and white" in their vision of things to really grasp the world around them. I think there are plenty of children who have been told they are just "too stupid" to learn something, when really it was a parent or teacher or other caregiver who didn't know how to communicate with that child. Then when you cross from human-human to human-animal, just think how much more it all unravels.

Teaching and training is actually a talent, as well as a practiced 'art' in my opinion.

I have a Scottish Terrier and although I would never have her off leash she will come when called. She has broken away due to a collar coming apart and dashed into the road. Lucky we don't have a lot of traffic but she did halt and stop running when I commanded "STOP". I walked within several feet of her then called her to me. She came when called (I was shocked because after all Terriers don't really want to come back after getting loose...it is their nature to be independent and to go off and "get the vermin") I praised her a lot while having a small heart attack.

Since she is hard wired to go look for small animals to kill I would never expect her to obey me 100 percent of the time when off leash. This is why she is never off leash unless I have a fenced in yard for her. She is well trained to walk on a lead because I cannot tolerate pulling and the dog moving back and forth in front of me.

Although the Scottish Terrier was not my first choice for a dog companion she fell into my life in such a way where I had to take her home. I work with her hard wire nature so we can live together in peace. Each animal I work with in a way that is more natural for their nature. I learned very quickly that working with my RFM is very different than any parrot I ever worked with before.

I have a spoiled 5lb yorkie who will leap in the air and steal food from my kids hands or unattended plates. She then makes a mad dash and squeezes under the couch. This IS my fault because we laugh when she does it.

Some very good replies!


I didn't mean to make this about dogs specifically, only used that instance as an example. I mean this for all animals in general!



I have an akita mix, possibly half pit (others say half lab - I don't know!), and he's a happy go lucky dog! He's not well trained, but he's trained well enough. He's social with people as well as other dogs. Before I moved into the city, I used to be able to bike around the neighborhood with him off leash and he'd follow me around. I can't do that anymore due to the new location and a lot of traffic! As long as he's not distracted, he comes when called! If he's distracted, it's a little harder to get his attention... but I know that's my fault for not teaching him to ignore distractions! I haven't taught him to heel, but he's also not difficult to walk. I actually noticed that when he was younger, the more exercise he got (i.e. running) the easier it was to walk him.



sofia, I'm in a similar predicament with Jayde. She's a social bird, but she likes to bite! She's gotten to the point that she hardly bites me at all, and if she does, it's not that hard. The same can be said for her most favorite person that she has only seen three times in her life! I have people who are *willing* to handle her, if she doesn't bite, but in order to get her to not bite them, she needs to be socialized with them! Which means that they are not going to handle her... It's frustrating.


There's one thing that I do with my dog that sounds horrible when I say it, but it's actually quite amusing! At least, I find it is! And that's beating the crap out of my dog! This started when I couldn't leave my dog outside during the day, so I needed him to go to the bathroom before coming back inside the house. The easiest way to get him to go to the bathroom was to get him excited. An easy way to do this? Slapping his sides like a drum. So here I am, slapping my dog, he's got his tongue out, big grin on his face, he gets all excited, then runs circles around the yard and then goes and takes a dump! And he's good for the rest of the day!



I can definitely see how teaching and training is an 'art'. There are different methods, some of which work better than others.


faeryphoebe, at least you recognize it! And if it's no bother to you, and she's not going to any other home, I don't see the issue with it as long as it's no danger to her or those she takes food from! Yes, she could be trained not to do that and she would be better behaved for it, but if the behavior doesn't bother anyone, why change?



Sounds like some of you have some well trained dogs! Well done on teaching them to be fantastic companions!

^Monica, it sounds like beating the crap out of your dog is a fun thing for him, lol. It's good that you figured out how to get him to poop.

I must admit that Phoebe is food aggressive. If we try to pull her out from under the couch, she will growl and bite. That place is her little "psycho-dog" den where she also likes to hoard things such as Barbie doll heads, Legos and Matchbox cars. We don't try to train her out of it because we find it so amusing. We just leave her be when she's under the couch.

We are her forever home. She's adored and loved. The Dog Whisperer would have a field day with me (not in a good way). I would never allow her to go to his boot-camp. Not our little princess, lol. He's too harsh for my taste, plus we'd miss her too much.

SilverSage said:

"oh he is just a puppy!! You have to let him be a puppy!"

Click to expand...

Oh, don't get me started on people disagreeing with you about your dog. My girl could be bossy and I would see her start to get ready to "have a go" at another dog and I'd tell the owner to watch her, and pull their dog in, and they'd go "oh, she's all right, she's just playing". No, she's about to leap on your dog, just because she looks like a cute puppy doesn't make her a sweet little pushover, stop your dog jumping on her or she's going to maul him!!!! It was exhausting. 2 people can control a situation, it's frustrating when you are the only one paying attention and they are just away with the fairies.

I agree! Also, it frustrates me when this attitude spills over on kids. I don't have any kids of my own, but my youngest sibling is 19 years younger than I am, so I am an adult figure to my youngest 3ish brothers and sisters. When I or my parents tell them they can't have or do something and another adult says "Oh it's ok" I have to tell them "No, it isn't." and then explain to them somehow why I said no in the first place, which usually makes them even more irritated at me. Of course, if I do not explain then they say "Oh no really, it is fine!" With dogs, kids, birds, horses, anything, many people fail to realize that the owner or adult is responsible for the wellbeing of the animal or child now and in the future, so it is our job to decide what can or cannot happen. My dog can't "nip" your fingers because my husband is an officer in the army and all of us, even the dog, have to be above reproach or we could damage his career. My bird cannot go on your shoulder because we have a constant stream of guest through our house, and don't want him to get in a habit that makes many people uncomfortable. My horse (not mine, but the one I am responsible for) cannot rub his head on you in a cute fashion because he is a child's horse, and he will knock kids over if he does that. And for crying out loud, my little brother can't have the piece of candy he just took without asking because I don't want him to learn he can take things that are not his! AAAAHHHH!!!

To change the world, we must change the way people think! Education goes a long way, too!

I have an acquaintance that has a house guest. Said house guest owns a small, intact male dog. Dog is aggressive towards people and other animals. It's obvious the dog needs training... but before the dog can get that training, the owner needs to be trained herself! Or rather, she needs to learn that whenever her dog starts getting aggressive that she shouldn't immediately pick him up and give him attention!!!! I hear she's now reading "Don't Shoot The Dog!" by Karen Pryor! Seems the little book has already made a slight difference in her behavior. She's finally realizing where she's going wrong.



I like the weird interaction I have with my dog. It's more fun than having him poop on command! LOL It also gets him to exercise!


He's not food aggressive with humans, nor dogs he knows very well, but he is towards stranger dogs he doesn't know very well at all. He's ok playing with other dogs, but if you were to set a dish of food down and the new dog tried to come eat from his dish, he wouldn't allow it. That was the only time I saw him get aggressive. When he was a puppy, he was not food aggressive with his brothers, his mother or the other dog I had at the time (which I had to tell him to eat his food! And he'd give you the most pathetic look like "Do I have to???" Otherwise, one of the others would get to it!).

Strangely enough, when he was at the pet sitter's house a few years back, and she has a few collies, everyone loved him! He was the quietest dog, only barked once (she was so hoping to hear him howl! everyone surprised by the fact he didn't make a lot of noise!) and no aggression issues what-so-ever! And he got along with the cats! I almost wasn't sure I'd get him back! LOL