Freedom is gone

[bug_n_flock]

It was fast. I couldn't post right away when it happened, I'm still kind of in denial? Idk if that's the right word. Every time I see her empty cage it's a jolt to my system, but I can't bring myself to take it apart just yet. I've thought about selling or giving it away, or maybe just taking it apart and storing it somewhere for now. I know there will be another large bird in my future, but I don't know how soon I'll be ready for that. Probably not for a while tho.

I don't "know" what was the cause, but I do know she had a history of very poor care three homes before mine. She had a few feathers the wrong color on her wings which is saying to me it was some kind of organ failure. The night before she passed I could tell something wasn't right, but I wasn't able to get her to a vet before she was gone.

We got six and a half wonderful years together, but I had hoped for so much more time together than that.

I have her body in the freezer for now, and I will be burying her in the spring when the ground thaws.

I am glad that one of her final meals was one of her favorite meals- pasta slathered in the red stuff

I miss her fruity excitement smell so much

This... Is the first place I've been able to say this even. There is nobody in my life to even tell that she is gone. Probably part of why it doesn't feel fully real, these are the first words I've put together about her being gone.

And now I am sobbing. I guess it's real now.

 

[GivemeSeedsorgivemeFlesh]

I'm so sorry for your loss!!

 

[nkrbkr]

Oh no. I’m so sorry to hear that.

 

[RavensGryf]

I’m so sorry to hear of your loss

 

[LaManuka]

Oh bug, Freedom was blessed to spend her golden years with you, but what a shock! My most heartfelt condolences are with you, I'm so sorry for your loss

 

[texsize]

I am so sorry.
It does take time to heal.

 

[DonnaBudgie]

Tell us more about Freedom. I know she was a B&G, but not just any B&G- she was special and you loved her very much. She was lucky to have been your birdchild and will not be forgotten. Grief is tough. It can seem to go on and on and on but eventually it doesn't sting as much to think of your lost loved ones, human or animal.

Please post some photos. Some say making a photo album of you pet after they pass is a good way to honor their memory. My heart goes out to you for your loss. Give yourself a hug from me and my flock.

 

[Macawdamia Nut]

How heartbreaking! I am so sorry for your loss.

 

[wrench13]

My deepest condolences, bugs. Been there, I know how it hurts.

 

[Vampiric_Conure]

**HUGE HUGE HUGE Hugs**

 

[bug_n_flock]

I'm still here. Couldn't come on the site tho it just made me too sad. I have her big cage taken apart and I'm storing it in the barn for now. Haven't gotten another big bird, haven't decided if I'm going to sell/donate/give away her big cage or hang on to it for the future.

Every so often the wind makes just the right sound, and I can almost hear her voice in the distance. Or sometimes I catch a whiff of something fruity and it makes me think of her. It makes me sad, but it also makes me smile to remember her

Still very sad, but it isn't unbearable like it was at first.

Thankfully all the other birds are well, and I have definitely leaned on them emotionally.

I have a bunch of her feathers hanging on my wall in the cabin. Helps me feel like she is still here in some small part.

This is definitely the kind of loss that will be felt for the remainder of my days.

I hope all of you and your fids are well I will probably come back to the forums but I don't think I am quite ready yet

 

[LaManuka]

I'm still here. Couldn't come on the site tho it just made me too sad. I have her big cage taken apart and I'm storing it in the barn for now. Haven't gotten another big bird, haven't decided if I'm going to sell/donate/give away her big cage or hang on to it for the future.

Every so often the wind makes just the right sound, and I can almost hear her voice in the distance. Or sometimes I catch a whiff of something fruity and it makes me think of her. It makes me sad, but it also makes me smile to remember her

Still very sad, but it isn't unbearable like it was at first.

Thankfully all the other birds are well, and I have definitely leaned on them emotionally.

I have a bunch of her feathers hanging on my wall in the cabin. Helps me feel like she is still here in some small part.

This is definitely the kind of loss that will be felt for the remainder of my days.

I hope all of you and your fids are well I will probably come back to the forums but I don't think I am quite ready yet

I believe they do stay close to us, @bug_n_flock. I lost my Lilly the purple-crowned lorikeet back in 2022 and I KNOW she visits me. About six months after she passed my hubby and I found this in our local furniture shop. Purple-crowns are not a well-known species even here where they are native, rarely kept as pets and I've hardly ever seen them represented in art, yet here it was. I dissolved into a mess of tears right there in the shop while my hubby went and bought it for me, and now it sits on my bed

Another time I was over at the grocery store buying fresh vegetables for the birds, and I had a bit of time to kill before catching the bus home so I waited inside the shops for a while because it was hot outside at the bus stop. And right there, on the seat inside the shopping centre, was this lorikeet feather. From a rainbow lorikeet as purple-crowns live a lot further south, but I know my Lilly arranged to put it there to say "hello"...

The great poet, Rumi, once wrote, “We come spinning out of nothingness, scattering stars like dust.” Now Freedom is a star in the heavens, shining down on you with loving brightness and all that is good and pure.

 

[weaving wolf]

It was fast. I couldn't post right away when it happened, I'm still kind of in denial? Idk if that's the right word. Every time I see her empty cage it's a jolt to my system, but I can't bring myself to take it apart just yet. I've thought about selling or giving it away, or maybe just taking it apart and storing it somewhere for now. I know there will be another large bird in my future, but I don't know how soon I'll be ready for that. Probably not for a while tho.

I don't "know" what was the cause, but I do know she had a history of very poor care three homes before mine. She had a few feathers the wrong color on her wings which is saying to me it was some kind of organ failure. The night before she passed I could tell something wasn't right, but I wasn't able to get her to a vet before she was gone.

We got six and a half wonderful years together, but I had hoped for so much more time together than that.

I have her body in the freezer for now, and I will be burying her in the spring when the ground thaws.

I am glad that one of her final meals was one of her favorite meals- pasta slathered in the red stuff

I miss her fruity excitement smell so much

This... Is the first place I've been able to say this even. There is nobody in my life to even tell that she is gone. Probably part of why it doesn't feel fully real, these are the first words I've put together about her being gone.

And now I am sobbing. I guess it's real now.

My partner and I lost our chickpea 20 months ago and I still cry, especially when i pour over one of her various art pieces, especially her poetry book(2nd draft). do you have a picture? our baby girls was a dusky headed conure and my first intimate experience with such a divine diva, she change my life forever. my hearts feels for you. tr poetry or write some stories....it will help to both remember and release pain