If your handsome fellow is getting that close to you guys, its huge progress, especially for how short a time you've had him! I brought home my first IRN baby about two months ago now.
Echo, who we estimate about 10-11 months old max right now, started off very afraid of us, and had been poorly handled before his first rescuer brought him home. His transition into our home was very stressful - It took about a week or two before he was truly 'comfortable' in our home daily, then about another week of daily work with him before he was taking treats from our fingers.
By 'comfortable,' I mean that he was beginning to play with his toys even when we were present, eating food, and preening himself. Showing signs of being relaxed, if not content. By week two, he was showing signs of being content - beak grinding even when I was present, taking naps when we were nearby and trusting us to "keep watch" while he napped, beginning to vocalize and make happy IRN noises. He was almost completely silent the first three days home, trying not to draw notice to himself and "hide" from us in doing so.
My first two parrots were/are both conures, and I've noticed some distinct differences in my interactions with them versus Echo.
Body language seems to be used much more often and subtly by him - Not that my other birds aren't also highly communicative through silent gestures, but Echo seems to take it to the next level.
Bongo is big on voice tone and is highly treat motivated; Echo often prefers me to be silent and 'speak' to him through gesture and body position. I've been learning when he likes noises and when he doesn't. Sometimes, if he is stressed, me speaking calmly can help; but I have noticed that taking a few deep, calming breaths to calm *myself* helps him even more, sometimes without a word said.
All I have to do when he is stressing out is look at him so he knows I see his stress signs, then relax myself, and go "back to normal" -- This does a lot to calm him, since he's taking cues of whether or not he is in danger or is safe from his "flock" and i'm now flock to him.
Versus, if I speak to him in a soothing voice, sometimes this stresses him more (I think because to his perspective, me looking at him and speaking is basically alerting anyone to the fact he is there, and he prefers to hide to feel safe).
If I'm not calm myself and try to hide calmness in my voice and pretend to be, this will also stress him, as he notices the mixed signal. He is much more relaxed with me when my emotions are open; not
dramatic or overreacting, but open. He doesn't like people who pretend to be happy and calm, likely wondering what they are hiding. In fact, they downright terrify him.
He is exceptional at sensing ulterior motives. Bongo doesn't seem to mind much, provided food is involved. I honestly am not sure if she recognizes when she's being lured with food, she's so excited for and distracted by it. Echo? He absolutely knows if you're luring him with food. If he goes for it, it's because he decided to, not because he was tricked. He'll ignore his favorite of favorite treats if he doesn't like the situation or want to do it.
So, I guess I'm saying, at least from what little experience I've had with my new baby boy so far -- with IRNs, I think actions speak louder than words to them. They are hyper-aware of you. Your emotions, your body language, how focused you are or aren't on them. And they have exceptional memories for patterns. They learn your habits whether you're aware of them or not.
Be genuine, and they'll be genuine back. Be scheming, and they'll do everything to outwit you so they can feel safe.
Really paying attention to what cues your parrot gives in response to X, Y, and Z stimuli will go a long way towards helping you understand the individual birds' body language and be able to tell when you're doing things 'right.'
Echo isn't handleable yet; he's only just beginning to calmly take treats from my fingers, so we haven't begun target training or anything yet. Everything I've done with him, including him now beginning to go peacefully into his cage when asked, has been without touching him.
I want to pet and cuddle my soft floofy cloud-like feather baby so bad sometimes, I just settle for picking up his molted feathers
Oh, the temptation.
I read a story recently on someone who's had their ringneck for six+ months and the bird still lunges at the bars to attack them whenever they come near.
So, your ringneck letting you come as close as he is and not showing signs of fear, is a huge accomplishment in your guys' relationship with him <3 Just keep doing what your doing, respecting his personal space and finding ways to include him that avoid the spooky-scary touching thing for now, and eventually, he'll decide he's curious enough and ready to try something new.
When he's relaxed, it says a LOT of good things about his comfort with you.
Yesterday, he tried gently squeezing my armseveral times in a row. I let him until he was pressing just too hard, then told him "Gentle, Echo" and hebacked up, looked at me --then tried again more cautiously and gently, and I praised him.
