Medical Stuff (aka my possibly interesting(?) experience of being alive)

[StormyPica]

i mean it shouldent but it will always be that way no matter how much u would wish them to be the opposite parents have opinions and i just try to respect them no matter what there say is i mean they are the older ones with more life experience and i respect what they have to say and what they think and try to live up to that standard

That's really hard for me, for multiple reasons... I'm not going to go too much into it, but my ADHD makes me physically and mentally unable to live up to certain expectations. It's a battle I've been fighting my whole life, but I'm seeing a doctor right now so hopefully I'll be able to get the help need soon.

Could you compromise and pick a short but slightly ‘girlish’ hairstyle, like a bob, that your mom would accept? It would at least be shorter…. Will she allow you to wear any short hairstyle?

I’m sorry this is happening to you.

I'd rather have my current hair than a bob, honestly. I can style it to be somewhat masculine. A bob is a bit too feminine for me.

 

[Birdgirl24]

like heather said maybe hair down to the shoulders or something nothing extremely long but still semi girly ish

 

[StormyPica]

Ima stick with my current hair atm, I'm just a bit upset that I can't cut it.

 

[Birdgirl24]

Ima stick with my current hair atm, I'm just a bit upset that I can't cut it.

understandable well Good luck

 

[HeatherG]

Ima stick with my current hair atm, I'm just a bit upset that I can't cut it.

Sorry that didn’t help.

Mainly I suggest you try for a compromise? Like is there a cut your mom would tolerate that you can stand?

Or put your hair in a ponytail?

Sad. My mom cut my hair off and then shaved the back. I hated it. Well, in a few years you can have your hair however you like it.

 

[BirdyBee]

Now that I think of it- my parents probably wouldn't allow me to have short hair. Although they won't mind if I cut it so it doesn't reach my shoulders.

 

[Birdgirl24]

Now that I think of it- my parents probably wouldn't allow me to have short hair. Although they won't mind if I cut it so it doesn't reach my shoulders.

same goes for mine

 

[StormyPica]

Sorry that didn’t help.

Mainly I suggest you try for a compromise? Like is there a cut your mom would tolerate that you can stand?

Or put your hair in a ponytail?

Sad. My mom cut my hair off and then shaved the back. I hated it. Well, in a few years you can have your hair however you like it.

My mom DID say I can cut my hair a bit above my shoulders! Soooo, I need adult opinions here, could I get a short haircut (like a boy's), and have the lowest part reaching my shoulders or right above? Would that count? I know if I ask my mom, she'll say I can't get a haircut, because she thinks I'm part of a group of people that pretend to be trans for attention.

 

[BirdyBee]

My mom DID say I can cut my hair a bit above my shoulders! Soooo, I need adult opinions here, could I get a short haircut (like a boy's), and have the lowest part reaching my shoulders or right above? Would that count? I know if I ask my mom, she'll say I can't get a haircut, because she thinks I'm part of a group of people that pretend to be trans for attention.

I think right above is ok. Your Mom won't mind that, but with the super short she might.

 

[Birdgirl24]

you could look up male hairstyles i guess? there are some longer ones that go down to almost the shoulder that you could look at

 

[StormyPica]

I've been watching a lot of Dr. Z's (she's a gender-based psychologist with a PhD) videos, because I've been having some issues with self-doubt due to my dysphoria being fairly mild. They've helped a lot, and I may bring up my dysphoria with my psychologist when I go to discuss further steps with ADHD. The problem is, this process is already going slowly. She seems like she'd rather diagnose me with anything BUT ADHD...

Oh, and my blood test results came back. I have a copper/zinc imbalance in my brain, apparently.

 

[HeatherG]

I looked up “boyish hairstyles” and saw some cuts that could be for anyone.

There was also an article about “gender-neutral hairstyles” which seemed like it might help. Could you find an online example that you’d feel ok about and get yr mom to agree to it?

 

[ravvlet]

If it’s any consolation, I am 36 years old and AFAB/identify as female, and when I shaved my head this summer (best decision of my life!) my whole family thought something was wrong and flipped out!

It’s so weird how many restrictions people who present or AFAB have on their hair, eh? What a strange thing for people to latch onto.

I hope you can arrive at a style that you like! My four year old (who is too young to worry about any of that stuff thankfully) decided randomly she wanted a Mohawk, so we shaved the sides of her head but left the top tapered and long and I think it’s a pretty cute, gender neutral look!

I hope you’ve found a way to be comfortable with your hair that doesn’t cause family strife!

 

[HeatherG]

What a cute haircut!

Yes, people really get weird about hair. Like My mom cutting all my beautiful hair off when I was a kid. That was so controlling and mean!

Or now I have very long dark hair and people in US think that’s weird. They keep telling me I ought to cut it off to give to cancer victims, or “what’s a Caucasian woman doing with so much straight black hair?” or things like that. Or people assume I’m super religious when no, I am part native and I have nice dark hair and that’s all.

It’s my head and I ought to be able to have or not have the hair I want.

And in my opinion so should you. It’s important to feel comfortable in your body.

At least remember you will be an ADULT soon and you can have your hair, clothing, body presentation as you like. It’s not forever even if it feels like that.

 

[SailBoat]

What a cute haircut!

Yes, people really get weird about hair. Like My mom cutting all my beautiful hair off when I was a kid. That was so controlling and mean!

Or now I have very long dark hair and people in US think that’s weird. They keep telling me I ought to cut it off to give to cancer victims, or “what’s a Caucasian woman doing with so much straight black hair?” or things like that. Or people assume I’m super religious when no, I am part native and I have nice dark hair and that’s all.

It’s my head and I ought to be able to have or not have the hair I want.

And in my opinion so should you. It’s important to feel comfortable in your body.

At least remember you will be an ADULT soon and you can have your hair, clothing, body presentation as you like. It’s not forever even if it feels like that.

Sadly, those around you seem to be overly opinionated, have very little to do or have a small life and are trying to live their life vicariously thru others!?! Since when did long dark hair become connected with a specific skin color. Sometimes being old comes in handy as what someone else has to say has ever less importances as age continues ever onward. Beautiful, healthy hair is to be celebrated every day and long before one losses it all.

 

[HeatherG]

Agreed. My ex husband had nice long hair until we both got towards 30. Then it began retreating….

 

[StormyPica]

So, I have possible PANDAS, I need B-12 injections 3x a week, possible GI issues, and I need a gluten (and banana, for whatever reason) free diet. Plus I have to take at least 3 more supplements. I'd rather just go on drugs at this point.

I'm so stressed. I can't stop crying, it's just so much thrown on me at once, plus the stress of school. I'm vegetarian also, and this restricts my diet SO MUCH MORE. But I can't have meat due to sensory issues. My dad keeps telling me I should be glad I don't have cancer....

 

[StormyPica]

Oh, and my binder came today. But that doesn't make me less stressed AT ALL.

 

[StormyPica]

Ima have my last gluten-free muffin

 

[BirdyBee]

So, I have possible PANDAS, I need B-12 injections 3x a week, possible GI issues, and I need a gluten (and banana, for whatever reason) free diet. Plus I have to take at least 3 more supplements. I'd rather just go on drugs at this point.

Oh no! I've heard of PANDAS and it's a terrible illness. My aunt once told me that she had to take vitamin B12 injections and it was... not pleasant. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

I'm so stressed. I can't stop crying, it's just so much thrown on me at once, plus the stress of school. I'm vegetarian also, and this restricts my diet SO MUCH MORE. But I can't have meat due to sensory issues. My dad keeps telling me I should be glad I don't have cancer....

I honestly think what you're facing is possibly worse than cancer.