My Too dont like me

[stcymcintyre]

Hello. I just got two umbrella cockatoos 5 days ago. The family I got them from decided to give them a new home due to them working 12 hour days and the birds being alone and locked in the cage all day. they said they started to get mean because of it. The male is 4 years old and I am his second home. The female is 8 years old and I am her third home. The male came around within the first day. Hes so loving and quite the character. The female adores my 12 year old daughter but hates me. If she is in her cage and I try to pet her, she tries to bite me unless I make her shake hands first. If she does her trick for me then I can love on her all I want. If she is out of the cage, the only way I can pet her is if I am behind her. If I try to pet her from the front, she bites. She tries to bite me when I walk past the cage. This morning she was sitting on the cage door and after I gave her a ton of love, I bent down to get the food dish to clean it and freshen the food and she hopped on my back and bit the back of my head making it bleed. She has never tried to bite my kids, just me. I need advice. What can I do to stop the biting and have a loving relationship with this beautiful girl?

 

[Dopey]

Patience - you have only had them five days. They don't trust you yet. When you go into her cage you are going into her domain and she is probably protecting it. My Severe used to try and bite me when I went into his cage. Finally I talked to him to let him know what I was doing inside his cage...now he let's me go into his cage and he doesn't try to bite me. I do the same with my Too. I explain what I'm doing and he let's me go into his cage without lunging at me. Just give it time.

I'm sorry she bit you. I know it hurts. It just takes patience and time.

 

[Hawk]

Hello. I just got two umbrella cockatoos 5 days ago. The family I got them from decided to give them a new home due to them working 12 hour days and the birds being alone and locked in the cage all day. they said they started to get mean because of it. The male is 4 years old and I am his second home. The female is 8 years old and I am her third home. The male came around within the first day. Hes so loving and quite the character. The female adores my 12 year old daughter but hates me. If she is in her cage and I try to pet her, she tries to bite me unless I make her shake hands first. If she does her trick for me then I can love on her all I want. If she is out of the cage, the only way I can pet her is if I am behind her. If I try to pet her from the front, she bites. She tries to bite me when I walk past the cage. This morning she was sitting on the cage door and after I gave her a ton of love, I bent down to get the food dish to clean it and freshen the food and she hopped on my back and bit the back of my head making it bleed. She has never tried to bite my kids, just me. I need advice. What can I do to stop the biting and have a loving relationship with this beautiful girl?

It takes time, 5 days is not anywhere near enoungh, try 5 months! No I'm not kidding. First there is the adjustment period, new home surroundings, daily routines, observance of all in household.

Another thing...... Parrot are protective of their cage, My Zons growl and nip if I take the food dish away, your invading their territory.
Sounds silly, but "ask them first" if you can get them yum yum....they soon will know that they are getting more food and will allow you to do so.
The cage and around it is their territory, their safety net. Theirs training techniques available to approach this issue logically.

Then comes the grieving period. Parrots are bonders to humans, they choose them like a person choses a mate. And They just lost their previous human mate. In the sense of the word. To bond, a parrot needs to 100% trust in you, that does NOT happen overnite by any means. My 2 Amazons were both rescues. My Oldest loved the crap out of it's previous owner, and they were very good to her, but that owner suffered a stroke, so I took on hhe Amazon. it took nearly 7 months before she stopped lunging at me and just sitting all day not wanting do play or anything. She absolutely wanted nothing to do with me.

Now She's my best buddy and we understand one another. She trusts me with all her heart and never bitten me since true bonding set in.

It takes a while....It may be frustrating, but go at the parrots pace as your insanity and patience will be challenged by these 2 birds, trust me on that.

 

[Kiwibird]

Parrots have not been bred down for thousands of generations to just automatically "like" humans like dogs and cats. They are at most 2-3 generations out of the wild. They are essentially wild animals (even if born in captivity) who have a strong prey drive (fight or flight), the asset of flight and large, powerful beaks designed to hollow out trees, rip open thick skinned fruits and crack nuts. Your particular birds have endured the mental trauma of being locked in a cage all day for many years. Likely after they were lavished with love and attention for some time (before the novelty for the prior owners wore off), then locked up for no reason without adequate diet or mental stimulation. Put yourself in their shoes and imagine how YOU would feel towards humans after that? Probably rather aggressive and angry.

This will take time and effort on your part. You can expect to be bit, several times, with blood drawn. Again, parrots are not feathered dogs and they do bite from time to time as a matter of normal behavior (even more viciously/frequently when they do not trust you). I would not let them interact with your children yet, as they are liable to bite them too. My bird was also a cage-case, locked in a tiny crate for many years because he "misbehaved" (i.e. he acted like a parrot...shocking!). He was vicious and feral when we got him. He bit me and my husband (me more than my husband) many times, some of the bites were pretty severe too. It took a solid year to get him semi-tame and several years to completely turn his behavior around and earn his full trust. He is VERY bonded to us now and as you can see in my profile pic, a real sweetheart of a bird who loves his kisses more than anything came out of a once "evil" bird. Time, patience, understanding is what takes birds from feral to friendly.

I would suggest to start with you sit by their cages and read or talk softly to them. If the come over, reward them with a small treat and verbal praise. Better yet, take a bowl of fruit over and start eating, then share some. Food is a BIG trust builder with birds. Sharing "your" food is a way to communicate that you want to welcome them into your "flock". Once you've started making some headway with that and see they are starting to become more happy to see you (expect a few weeks, maybe sooner maybe longer though) then look into target training. Lots of free youtube videos explaining the concept and it's a great tool to work with vicious rehomes to create a way of communicating with your bird and building mutual trust Don't despair this soon after getting them! PLEANTY of people have had their birds make total behavioral turnarounds and all it takes is patience, love and a true commitment to being the birds forever home (i.e. not giving up on them because they are difficult). Best of luck.

 

[stcymcintyre]

I wont give up on her, thats for sure. I like the fruit idea but unlike the male, she wont eat anything except the bird seed. I have offered her several fruits and vegetables and the only one she tried was an apple, even with me showing her the food and eating it myself and making a big deal over how good it is. I know it will take time, which I have plenty of, I just really wish she would give me some kind of sign that shes either going to be open to me petting her or shes going to bite.

 

[Kiwibird]

For right now then, pretend to eat seed and then "share" some of your seed with her You can focus on diet changes once some trust is built, and actually if you get her interested and excited about what you "eat", it may be easier to get her excited to try fruits and veg in a few weeks/months because she sees you eating them

As for "signs" some birds are blatant, others strike without warning. My zon will flash and hiss and theres no mistaking when he's pissed. Cockatoos, on the other hand, strike without warning. My dad has a cockatoo and he was the worst biter (not trying to scare you). After a while though you can almost see it in their eyes that evil, devious too' eye they give right before they lance you open. Watch their eyes, it's very very subtle but you'll start to recognize that little squint and slight turn of the head.

 

[Taw5106]

As others have said patience. Five days is not long and you have to build a relationship. Food is a great motivator and routine.

 

[Allee]

Congratulations and Welcome to the forum!

When I brought my U2 home, someone told me it takes a year to get to know a Too. I didn't understand until after a year had passed. While you are studying Duchess, she's also studying you and deciding wether you are trustworthy. After that first bite, I know it's tough, but if she realizes you are afraid of being bitten, she will know she has the upper hand. Letting them be above eye level with you may not be a good idea, at least for now. Don't be above bribery, find their favorites, foraging toys, birdy bread, phone books, a ball they can throw, music, cartoons. Keep them as busy as you can. I know U2's are known for being cuddle bugs, but that's not always the best thing for them. Give them time to adjust to their new home and humans. As Hawk mentioned, they may be grieving. They build strong bonds. Good luck with your beautiful pair of Toos.

 

[4dugnlee]

Patience is key! It took my U2 four months to step up to me. Now she steps up but it still takes a little while. She still tests me with her beak but she only nips me lightly...never draws blood (at least not yet). Their body language is very different than other parrots and I'm still trying to learn hers. Five days is not enough time to gain your toos trust. Go at her pace and it will be worth it.

 

[Hawk]

Parrots have not been bred down for thousands of generations to just automatically "like" humans like dogs and cats. They are at most 2-3 generations out of the wild. They are essentially wild animals (even if born in captivity) who have a strong prey drive (fight or flight), the asset of flight and large, powerful beaks designed to hollow out trees, rip open thick skinned fruits and crack nuts. Your particular birds have endured the mental trauma of being locked in a cage all day for many years. Likely after they were lavished with love and attention for some time (before the novelty for the prior owners wore off), then locked up for no reason without adequate diet or mental stimulation. Put yourself in their shoes and imagine how YOU would feel towards humans after that? Probably rather aggressive and angry.

This will take time and effort on your part. You can expect to be bit, several times, with blood drawn. Again, parrots are not feathered dogs and they do bite from time to time as a matter of normal behavior (even more viciously/frequently when they do not trust you). I would not let them interact with your children yet, as they are liable to bite them too. My bird was also a cage-case, locked in a tiny crate for many years because he "misbehaved" (i.e. he acted like a parrot...shocking!). He was vicious and feral when we got him. He bit me and my husband (me more than my husband) many times, some of the bites were pretty severe too. It took a solid year to get him semi-tame and several years to completely turn his behavior around and earn his full trust. He is VERY bonded to us now and as you can see in my profile pic, a real sweetheart of a bird who loves his kisses more than anything came out of a once "evil" bird. Time, patience, understanding is what takes birds from feral to friendly.

I would suggest to start with you sit by their cages and read or talk softly to them. If the come over, reward them with a small treat and verbal praise. Better yet, take a bowl of fruit over and start eating, then share some. Food is a BIG trust builder with birds. Sharing "your" food is a way to communicate that you want to welcome them into your "flock". Once you've started making some headway with that and see they are starting to become more happy to see you (expect a few weeks, maybe sooner maybe longer though) then look into target training. Lots of free youtube videos explaining the concept and it's a great tool to work with vicious rehomes to create a way of communicating with your bird and building mutual trust Don't despair this soon after getting them! PLEANTY of people have had their birds make total behavioral turnarounds and all it takes is patience, love and a true commitment to being the birds forever home (i.e. not giving up on them because they are difficult). Best of luck.

Absolutely good advice for all..... Sharing your food, shows you are not a threat but a friend. They need to know this...Trust is the number one , And I mean Number 1 thing that HAS to happen, before anything will come from the parrot. Reading next to the cage is a very good advice, to hear your voice and tone of voice is also important. Parrots know anger and shouting, so be leary of that and use gentle voice, laugh with them, sing a song with them...show them you want acceptance into the flock and they'll show you they want acceptance into your flock..and before you know it, your one very big happy flock...!!!

 

[Hawk]

I wont give up on her, thats for sure. I like the fruit idea but unlike the male, she wont eat anything except the bird seed. I have offered her several fruits and vegetables and the only one she tried was an apple, even with me showing her the food and eating it myself and making a big deal over how good it is. I know it will take time, which I have plenty of, I just really wish she would give me some kind of sign that shes either going to be open to me petting her or shes going to bite.

Try different presentations, sizes, water it down meaning run water over the fruit, some parrots like it wet. Experiment, what works for one person may not work for another. Parrots may be same breed, but they all( like you and I) have different preferences. Try a skewer...warm it up ( the veggies), I have 4 parrots and Have to make the same veggies 3 different ways, one likes it this way, one likes it that way, one likes it another...sounds time consuming but that's the truth.

 

[strudel]

she wont eat anything except the bird seed.

Again, give it time. Put yourself in her "shoes" and think how it is for her. She's somewhere new (strange), there are new people (strange) and they are waving new food at her. Some people/birds/animals are open to new and strange, others like their routines and familiar things. Don't force anything on her, but continue to offer anything and everything. One day she might be in the mood, like the smell, feel happy with you to follow your example, etc etc, to give something a try. Just let her be, don't push things onto her and let her decide what she's comfortable with. Don't try to categorise anything as in "she likes this, doesn't like that". In time, she can adapt to all sorts of things that today she's rejecting for her own reasons. Don't assume that she'll never like things just because she's not showing an affinity for them today.

I learnt this with my galah. I thought she didn't like baths because she didn't leap into the water and splash around. I just let her be and took her in the shower, she could stand up the end. When she's in the mood, she stands right underneath the stream. She doesn't do it the way others do, splashing and moving about, she just stands there. She is totally free to walk back out of the water, so she must like it. It doesn't look like much, but it's what she's chosen to do. Other times she just stays up the end with her wings out, getting intermittent splashes.

There is no "should" as to how they show they like things. Just leave them be, offer everything and let them decide. Today, a banana might go untouched, tomorrow it'll be gobbled like they've never had a square meal.

FWIW, I'm the same. If I get a floury apple, I might not eat it. A tasteless banana, a squishy strawberry. Doesn't mean I don't like those things, I'm just fussy/spoilt. Tomorrow with a different batch, I'll eat them like there's no tomorrow.

 

[Hawk]

As others have said patience. Five days is not long and you have to build a relationship. Food is a great motivator and routine.

Partly true...Your own body language and voice speaks a 1000 words...Food can also be a negative motivator as well. They'll end up training YOU that way. Bonding is being your self around the birds, they are very observant and study you with a keen eye. They are also remarkable listeners. Pictures are amusing to a parrot. I have one computer hooked up to a 60 inch flat screen, and down load parrot pictures or parrot singing...it calms and soothe the parrots.

 

[Delfin]

an all seed diet makes for one unhealthy and grumpy bird. I read an article about an all seed diet and there was a comparison that a parrot on an all seed diet is the same has a human on an all peanut diet and it can shorten a life by 50%.

I suggest that you find a training treat for them and remove that item from their diet. Place five different food items on a plate. These can a sunflower seed, almond seed, pine nut etc. Watch which item is eaten first. This becomes the training treat.

At this time I would remove all food from the cage when the birds are put to bed but leave the water. In the morning before giving them breakfast I would spend 5 minutes hand feeding them through the cage. I would also use a clicker to reinforce this behaviour. each time one of the birds takes a training treat gently click the clicker. Then give them breakfast has normal. I would also repeat this at dinner time.

Before subjecting your fingers to a cockatoo beaks when hand feeding I would use a spray of millet first then reduce the size on each session until you can feed them small titbits. Show the bird the training treat and if the bird doesn't approach the training treat in 15 seconds remove it from the birds sight for 20 to 30 seconds. Then re-offer it. in that 20 to 30 seconds most birds will go "Hey what was that? was that FOOD? where did it go?" then "Hey that FOOD is back I'm not missing out again".

I know from experience that on one day Delfin and Mulawa will like a particular type of food and then another day they won't. They get a variety of foods and we try to give them something different each day. Guess what They don't always eat what we give them. in fact the food that they don't want or like is thrown out of the bowl. I wouldn't agree that food can be a negative motivator.

If you interact with your bird you should be in a calm and relaxed state has a bird can pick up on your emotional state which can affect the interaction. I have Delfin for over a year and Mulawa for a couple of months Delfin was hand raised in a family environment with young children were has Mulawa was an aviary bred bird. yet she is becoming quite comfortable with all of us. But interacting with a re-homed Parrot is different due to possible array of issues and you might consider looking for professional help or you ask Birdman666 for advise, has he a lot of experience with re-homed birds.

 

[strudel]

a bird can pick up on your emotional state which can affect the interaction.

Also, what our pets are perceiving isn't necessarily the same as what we are. To us, everything might seem exactly the same as it did yesterday, but our pets might feel differently. They might be worried by the lawnmower up the road when we don't even notice it. Even the weather can be impacting them differently. Atmospheric pressure might be affecting them when it takes more before we think it's unpleasant. They are not exactly the same as us, so we might not even know what they are perceiving and feeling to understand what might be unsettling them. There are all sorts of things going on at any time, sights, smells, sounds, vibrations, etc etc etc. not to mention hormones. It's a wonder we can have such wonderful relationships with pets when you consider how different we are.

 

[Delfin]

Yes there are many things that can impact on a bird. Before I approach my birds I get into the right mindset so I'm in a calm and relaxed state, talk to them in a quiet and slow manner. This especially important after a bad day at work. But Delfin is always happy to see me when I get home from work and that's because he is one of our flock.
Mulawa is learning fast too.

 

[stcymcintyre]

Thank you everyone! Lots of great advice. I think I made a little tiny head way with her last night. When I put them to bed, I tell them nite nite and Duchess always says nite nite and Duke says nite nite baby. Last night Duchess kissed my hand then said nite nite! I have also found that she likes apples but they have to be cut into small pieces with the skin and she peels the skin off before she eats it. This morning she even let me pet her from the front and she made a small coo sound. She still wont let me pet Duke if hes sitting right beside her. The small step she took last night definitely gave me great hope! There is another question I have, she was sitting in her cage yesterday and Duke was on top playing and she started smacking her beak on the cage bars, is that "normal?" Thank you again to everyone, this forum is great!!!

 

[stcymcintyre]

Finally got a pic of them on here. I made it my avatar, haven't figured out how to add it here.

 

[Dopey]

Such lovely birds.
Do they sleep in the same cage together?

 

[Taw5106]

Buddy, my GCA slams his beak against the bars but he's cage aggressive meaning this is my house, stay away. He doesn't do this to me but to my Husband and anyone else there. To make it worse he'll say "Hello" very sweetly then start slamming his beak against the cage bars. You have a beautiful pair of birds.