New bird Mom help please!

[Jenn89]

Hi new to the group just recently brought home a Congo African grey he’s about 7 months old his name is Elvis and I’m inlove with him the only problem is he loves my boyfriend and hates me we have had him almost a week my boyfriend can do anything he wants to him pet him pick him up me he will only let me do it once in a blue moon I’m trying to b presistent but I’m getting frustrated and I think he picks up on that and dosent like me even more help!!

 

[texsize]

I am not an expert with CAG's but...

I think you have a good chance of turning this around. From what I have read CAG's are less likely to be one person birds than say Amazon parrots are.

The 2 best tips I can think of are.

Become the main person that feeds and waters the bird. Hand him treats and things that he finds tasty.

Show No Fear. Birds pick up on people that are nervous around them and are afraid of getting bitten. They will use this to there advantage and intimidate you. CAG's are darn smart Learn his body language faster than he learns yours.

There are a lot of CAG owners here and I am sure they can give you more and better advice. My CAG was so friendly from day one that it was not something I had to struggle with.

texsize

 

[LeaKP]

Hi there! It's still early days with your young bird. CAGs have people they prefer but will go to anyone who will build a relationship with them. One week is a very, very short time and your bird is still confused with the change of environment - wondering what has happened. CAGs work well with routine and stability. Take your time, offer lots of treats and go a bit slower. Check out all the threads in the CAG forum on training and behaviour.

I've never met a CAG who won't respond - it just takes time on our part as caregivers to be patient and offer love and stability. They are really sensitive, among the most sensitive of parrots. However, they are so smart that the payoff is worth it.

It has taken a couple of years for my CAG's personality to blossom. It took months of patience and routine but he's king now of the house.

 

[Jenn89]

THabks giys for responding you made my day cuz I love him so much and really want a good relationship with him and you gave me hope!! Just frustrating cuz my boyfriend did not want the bird and I begged him he finally agreed and now there the best of friends and he thinks it’s funny ��but I won’t give up!

 

[Scott]

A warm welcome to you and Elvis! Greys are among the most stubborn but intelligent of parrots; with proper training you can use both to advantage.

Elvis is both young and still new to your home. It is common for parrots to "choose" people, but that does not mean they become "one person birds."

You are going to have to work harder than your boyfriend to bond. There are many techniques and this thread covers a few: http://www.parrotforums.com/general-parrot-information/49144-tips-bonding-building-trust.html
CAG 101 is priceless and a great read: http://www.parrotforums.com/congo-timneh-greys/59366-cag-101-a.html

Greys are quite unique and very well worth the effort to socialize and bond! Good luck, keep us posted with progress, and feel free to post specific questions. We are a large Grey community!

 

[Loz]

Welcome to the forum!
Considering you haven't had him a week, I think your parrot is doing well adjusting to it's new home and faces! Like Scott has mentioned, "You are going to have to work harder than your boyfriend to bond" but it isn't impossible. The fact they are accepting treats from you is great and may work in your favor.

 

[MooshieBird]

Congratulations! CAGs are great, and if you are only a week in everything is going well. It takes time to build trust with all kinds of birds but CAGs take a lot of patience. Often they will prefer just a few people, or sometimes even just one but most usually do well with many people. My Grey also prefers men so that could be an issue with your bird but it usually isn't insurmountable. I have had Mushka for just a bit over 3 months and it has taken her this long to really start to get along with others in my home. When I first met her she liked me immediately and it took me a month of visiting her every day before I felt we were ready to bring her home. She used to bite everyone but me and now she readily steps up for others and will even let those she knows scratch her head and it gets better all the time.

Greys are slow to acclimate but very adaptable given enough time. I advise that you work with your Grey daily, act with confidence but don't force things, make every experience with you end in a positive (with treats and praise), and let your Grey make the first move as much as you can. Also try to work with her when your boyfriend isn't around as he can be a distraction. Mushka asked me for head scratches before I asked her, and when she stepped up for the first time she did it just because she chose to without being asked.

After knowing her for just about 4 to 5 months she is very well bonded and a complete cuddle monster and is responding very well to all the training I throw at her. Give your Grey the time they need and the results will come.

 

[GaleriaGila]

Welcome to our community!

Elvis has ENTERED the building!

 

[Jenn89]

He is starting to get excited when I enter the room now so I think that’s a good sign ���� I’ll keep u guys posted on our progress and if u think of any other advice please feel free to share it thanks!

 

[Soyajam]

Welcome!
If it's any consolation Jenn, that's exactly what happened with me when I got Remi.

My partner was all "I don't want a bird, I think you're bonkers for getting a bird" and now she's home, he's her favourite person! She flies to him first, she prefers snuggling him, and now - she's giving me much more sass than to him!

I, like you, feel a bit offended. After all, I'm the bloody bird slave here!
I understand it's the way sometimes for them to prefer one over the other.

My tactic moving forward:
* My partner doesn't dish out treats for a while.
* I'm the training lady (and thus am the treat lady)
* We both still "train" in our everyday actions (eg when she does something on command she's rewarded with praise from both of us)
* My partner is the "Big Meanie" - which means he is in charge of stuff she's not too keen on, like bed/cage time, showers, etc.
* I do my best to be, er... more persuasive with stealing my own amount of cuddles (but only as far as she's still comfortable.)

I haven't a clue if this will work, but *shrug*.
If there's anything you haven't thought of above, try that too.

Good luck! I'm hoping that with the huge lifespans these creatures have that eventually it'll all get figured out...

 

[wrench13]

Welcome and be welcomed. You want to set up a specific time, every day that it's just you and Elvis, to work with him. Doesn;t have to be long 20-30 minutes but it should be done religiously every day. And patience is your best friend. Find Elvis' most favorite treat, and only you give it to him. There is lots more to learn , read all the info on the Grey sub forum, several times. Greys are really smart, really really smart and you need to keep that in mind as you work with him. Good luck

 

[Billdore]

The first week of visiting Timneh she was still making me bleed from nips. I showed no anger, or frustration nothing but love and I think i really blew her mind. I was so excited to meet her I didn't really notice and actually was trying to hide my bleeding hand from anyone so they wouldn't think me strange. Timnehs previous owners said she wasn't friendly and got rid of her. Sure she wasn't too friendly in getting to know the giant in front of her but once she let her guard down what a little love muffin she is. I have friends and family that took Timneh a year to fly too, and others that can handle Timneh the same day they meet her. Not sure what her criteria is but no one is counted out forever. lol Good luck don't give up. Open your eyes really wide and bob your head up and down. Suppose to mean you want to play. Try not to laugh while your doing it.

 

[bigfellasdad]

ouch, I hear you on this as my CAG is strongly bonded to me and has bitten other members of my family. My cag is 13yrs old so a harder situation than yours

What i am doing to counter this, when others are in my home I do not treat Enzo, others do. I ensure Enzo is in the room with others when ever possible, initially in her cage now she is free to roam. I ensure others ALWAYS greet Enzo with a hello and a treat and ideally they should read or just chat with her at any opportunity.

So far enzo has stopped attacking, she will often fly to others and land on their heads, which she doesnt do to me!)

Basically make sure your new CAG gets to know that good things happen when you are around, ensure that your bird sees no fear in you and not threatened.

Your bird is very young so work on this now, i wish you well. The CAGs are quite demanding flock birds but they are wonderful to have around. Wish you luck and love.