Yes this is a trust issue. After 3 yrs you should be able to do about anything with your fid. He'd let his "mate" do anything. The bird is not bonded to you, yes he's a bit young but he should have a favorite by now. Somewhere/sometime that bird has had an issue with hands. Trust is the only way your going to the results your looking for. How you get there is up to you and what works for your fid. I fear your zon thinks he's the flock leader and no one is worthy of his status. You need to be confident ,outgoing and affectionate to elevate yourself in his eyes. You need to be more of a leader or at least an equal. Try and see the world though his eyes, there's a reason for every thing he does. Ask him to step up and when he doesn't , walk away and don't ask again, act like he's missing out on something. When he does step up ,put him back down on his cage and tell him what a good bird he is. Give him atreat and walk away. Leave every interaction with him ,with him wanting more of you instead of you you smothering him . If your pushing yourself on him then he's calling the shots by telling you no. He needs to decide that he wants to be with you. Don't try and convince him, just give him a "taste" and leave him wanting.