Pickle had to be let go today.

[pickleisasillybird]

I posted about her status when initially joining these forums for advice. I was hopeful that perhaps it was the medication causing her to decline, but something felt wrong, and I wanted to take her to the emergency room.

She had to stay overnight as she was dehydrated. I got a call in the morning. The avian nurse who cared for her told me they ran diagnostics, x-ray, bloodwork. It was all over the place. Her red blood cell count was low, she was anemic. Her liver and kidney numbers were so high their machine couldn't read it accurately--her organs were failing. The throat inflammation and pitch change was a red herring, the former had to have slowly been creeping up on her, per the avian ER nurse. She wasn't going to last much longer. Any treatment we could've done would've has <50% chance of working, and if it did, she'd have permanent organ damage.

She looked so tired when I visited her. Her poops were black as tar. She was trying to chirp and be awake for me, but I knew her fire was burning really low. She kissed me on the face as we waited for the people who preformed the procedure to come in, I think she knew it was her time, she didn't struggle when they took her to inject her.

I take solace in the fact I know I couldn't have done anything different. She was only 4, but the vet told me that this is common, especially birds bought from even exotic stores that are well organized, there's a lot of inbreeding when it comes to parrots raised in captivity and it probably was something that happened at birth (she had an enlarged liver) via an infection early in life. I just wish life was fair.

My heart is shattered. This bird saved my life. I'm so sorry I couldn't save hers. She watched me grow up for 4 years, I in turn did the same for her. This organism had so much of an impact on my life, it was never the same after she made a screaming entrance in it. A part of me left this world with her. I'm going to miss her so much, her little antics, her stealing my food and screaming in my face, waking me up at 6 am going "HI! HI! HI! HI! HI! H!I" just to piss me off. She changed my life, I became a better person because of her.

I have nobody to talk to about this. Nobody I know has lost a pet this terribly. I feel so alone and isolated. I'd normally go to her when I'm sad. I just can't, anymore.

 

[zERo]

I am so terribly sorry for your loss!

I can tell you loved Pickle with all of your heart, and please, don’t blame yourself!
These things cannot be predicted and can happen to any of us.

I know words can only offer minimal condolence, but reading them can help tremendously.
When my darling Falkor, a budgie died, it was so unexpected and felt like my heart was being ripped out…and yet her passing anniversary came and went twice now.

I know it feels like this grief is infinite and terrible and for a time, it will hurt, but in time, you will look upon all of the wonderful times you and Pickle had, and you will smile.

Maybe you’ll even find the strength to bless another bird and care for them and love them too.

Again, sorry for your loss.

 

[wrench13]

I am so sorry to read of Pickle's passing, she certainly had a tight bond with you. When you think of her, remember all the good things! THats how we keep them alive.

You should know I make a periodic donation to Cornell Univ VET dept, in the names of all the beautiful little souls that have passed since the last one and I direct the funds to be used exclusively for parrot related studies and programs. Pickle's name will be on the next one.

 

[LaManuka]

I posted about her status when initially joining these forums for advice. I was hopeful that perhaps it was the medication causing her to decline, but something felt wrong, and I wanted to take her to the emergency room.

She had to stay overnight as she was dehydrated. I got a call in the morning. The avian nurse who cared for her told me they ran diagnostics, x-ray, bloodwork. It was all over the place. Her red blood cell count was low, she was anemic. Her liver and kidney numbers were so high their machine couldn't read it accurately--her organs were failing. The throat inflammation and pitch change was a red herring, the former had to have slowly been creeping up on her, per the avian ER nurse. She wasn't going to last much longer. Any treatment we could've done would've has <50% chance of working, and if it did, she'd have permanent organ damage.

She looked so tired when I visited her. Her poops were black as tar. She was trying to chirp and be awake for me, but I knew her fire was burning really low. She kissed me on the face as we waited for the people who preformed the procedure to come in, I think she knew it was her time, she didn't struggle when they took her to inject her.

I take solace in the fact I know I couldn't have done anything different. She was only 4, but the vet told me that this is common, especially birds bought from even exotic stores that are well organized, there's a lot of inbreeding when it comes to parrots raised in captivity and it probably was something that happened at birth (she had an enlarged liver) via an infection early in life. I just wish life was fair.

My heart is shattered. This bird saved my life. I'm so sorry I couldn't save hers. She watched me grow up for 4 years, I in turn did the same for her. This organism had so much of an impact on my life, it was never the same after she made a screaming entrance in it. A part of me left this world with her. I'm going to miss her so much, her little antics, her stealing my food and screaming in my face, waking me up at 6 am going "HI! HI! HI! HI! HI! H!I" just to piss me off. She changed my life, I became a better person because of her.

I have nobody to talk to about this. Nobody I know has lost a pet this terribly. I feel so alone and isolated. I'd normally go to her when I'm sad. I just can't, anymore.

@pickleisasillybird, I'm so very sorry for your loss of your precious girl. Many of us have lost feather-babies under the most heartbreaking of circumstances too, so you are among like-minded folk here who understand how very deeply this hurts. I lost a little lorikeet called Lilly way back in January 2022, she had pretty much saved my life too following the completely unexpected loss of a GCC named Baci who had been my heart-bird, losing her was like losing the two of them at once and it tore my heart out too. But I found great solace in being part of this community, whose members understand this pain and empathised with my grief, and although your pain is still very raw, I hope you will find a degree of comfort here too. And I know you will see Pickle again at the Rainbow Bridge, and that she will greet you with love when you do ✨💖

 

[pickleisasillybird]

I am so sorry to read of Pickle's passing, she certainly had a tight bond with you. When you think of her, remember all the good things! THats how we keep them alive.

You should know I make a periodic donation to Cornell Univ VET dept, in the names of all the beautiful little souls that have passed since the last one and I direct the funds to be used exclusively for parrot related studies and programs. Pickle's name will be on the next one.

Thank you, thank you so much. I'm sure she would've both loved this and would've tried to eat the money herself if she could. :')

I definitely will, it's hard to think about her right now, hell, the parakeet we rescued that tried all his life to impress her without even getting her to look at her learned to mimic all of her calls and peeps and screams. It's hard to listen to right now but I know it's something I'll come to appreciate. It's almost like he's trying to keep her memory alive too.

 

[pickleisasillybird]

@pickleisasillybird, I'm so very sorry for your loss of your precious girl. Many of us have lost feather-babies under the most heartbreaking of circumstances too, so you are among like-minded folk here who understand how very deeply this hurts. I lost a little lorikeet called Lilly way back in January 2022, she had pretty much saved my life too following the completely unexpected loss of a GCC named Baci who had been my heart-bird, losing her was like losing the two of them at once and it tore my heart out too. But I found great solace in being part of this community, whose members understand this pain and empathised with my grief, and although your pain is still very raw, I hope you will find a degree of comfort here too. And I know you will see Pickle again at the Rainbow Bridge, and that she will greet you with love when you do ✨💖

I'm so very sorry for your loss as well. Pickle was actually an impromptu purchase I got from an exotic breeder after grieving my first rescue parrot, Rosie -- She was a Rosy Bourke Parakeet and suddenly passed away from a seizure. She also helped me through that grief and ended up being my ride or die. It's exactly as you said, it feels like I lost both Rosie all over again, and now I bear the loss of my beloved baby too. Thank you for your kind words.