She likes him more than me... PART 2

Deii

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Salem, OR
Parrots
Green Cheek Conure: Brilho
OK... so I've been doing some research and I want to get some of your guys' opinions.

From what a lot of people have told me, I am out of luck, but I refuse to think so. I've only had Brilho for two weeks.

So the situation is this: I brought Brilho home a couple of weeks ago. My boyfriend was there when I picked her up and has always been around during her playtime. Even though I thought I had done my research, I never knew that the first few days/weeks/months spent with the bird is critical and they bond during that period. I thought I was doing the right thing by socializing her to everyone and anyone who walked in the door... I guess I was wrong.

I haven't done anything to harm her and I give her lot of treats and snuggles and outside time (I'm always home when she's out) but she has decided as of several days ago that my boyfriend will be her best friend.

It sounds selfish but this devastated me. I wanted a friend, and I wanted her to be nice with everyone, but still prefer me.

At this point, she flies to his spot on the bed (the last place she saw him) and bites and ignores me. He has agreed to stay away for a while so we can bond, but I still feel like she's just constantly looking for him.

My dad has been doing a lot of calling around and has talked to a few pet stores and people in the area. Here are a couple techniques I have heard:

1. Just put her in the cage when he's around. (doubt it)

2. It's going to take a LONG time for her to change her mind (like a year) and in that time he can't have contact with her. She's probably a girl because of her monogamous behavior.

3. Keep her on my finger (not the shoulder because then they feel like equals and they can do whatever they want) and work with her directly for at least an hour a day for a week or two and then she'll come to see me as her master, etc.

Part of the reason I really don't want her to bond with him is because I don't think we're going to be together for the duration of her life. Not only is she MY bird who lives with me and I care for, but at some point he might vanish. I made the commitment to her, not he.

This has really been stressing me out. I want her to be happy. :( If she decides she just doesn't like me, should I find her a new home? She is still very young so she would do fine making another transition (born May 1).

I just don't know what to do D:
 
Oh yeah, and when I have her on my finger she turns her back to me.

This behavior has only started a few days ago.
 
The key is to get hear comfeteble in your company and you comfteble in hear company. You cant hide any feeling for hear so i think you should drop " she dont like me" and take it from now on. Only way to bild up a relation is not to be pushing and take the time needed. Spend as musch time as possible with hear but let hear come to you. Soner or later she will ask for you company and then is the right time to create a relation
 
sorry it might not be how you planned the relationship with your bird, but she just happens to like your boyfriend

dont cage her when his about, she will see this as you trying to keep them apart!

the finger thing, i've no idea on, but good idea incase she gets bitty!

she wont change her mind, but she will tolerate you, and in time enjoy your company when he is not about!

i am second fiddle to my man, i do all the care etc but he get all the loving an attention but the thing is he does not want it, so his the one that puts her into her cage etc
but when he is not about she is happy to be with me etc

but like all things birdy it takes time an patience, and fraustrating down along the way
 
Oh yeah, and when I have her on my finger she turns her back to me.

This behavior has only started a few days ago.

Deii, it's not surprising your bird prefers someone else, what with all the stress you are generating she is feeling rather unsettled. You really need to focus on you & your bird & get rid of all this negetive energy.

I have found this link for you so please read it.

https://companionparrotonline.com/Think_Parrot_Hates.html
 
Thanks Pedro, that helps. :)
 

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