When to give attention?

[ivysaur]

I was getting worried that my bird was a spoiled attention addict. When I put her on a perch to occupy herself while I do chores, she paces back and forth to get my attention. I ignore her if she screams, give her an almond if she calms down.

She plays by herself pretty well but I don't understand how much attention is too much. If she stares at me flapping her wings asking to be picked up, is it bad to pick her up? Is attention supposed to be on my terms, or is it OK for her to ask for it?

 

[PetoftheDay]

How much time do you spend with her, giving her one-on-one attention now? You want to strike a balance between giving her enough, but not becoming a slave to her desires (good luck with that)!

 

[MonicaMc]

Yes, it's ok to handle her on her terms. She's a companion, which means there's a relationship... not your slave, and she's supposed to do as you say.

At the same time, she also needs to be independent enough to do her own things when you can't handle her immediately.


It may be hard to find that happy balance, but if you work at it, it can be done. If you can't handle her directly, you might try keeping her preoccupied with foraging, toys, treats, etc.

 

[Wulfgeist]

Jasper will make it known when he wants to come over by me. He has this begging sort of whistle and when I look over he's all hanging off his cage door trying to stretch over to me. He pretty much sees something or thinks there's something over here he wants to check out I think. If she's not doing it all the time, cherish her companionship for what it is. You definately don't want to reward her with any attention if she is screaming or being naughty in any way.

 

[Kantia]

My conure, Tich does exactly the same thing when I'm tidying up. He'll go back and forth and make a cute little penguin sound to try and get my attention.
Best thing I can suggest is giving yours some toys to stay occupied, or talk to her whilst your in the same room. You're still giving her attention vocally which might help.

 

[ivysaur]

Jasper will make it known when he wants to come over by me. He has this begging sort of whistle and when I look over he's all hanging off his cage door trying to stretch over to me. He pretty much sees something or thinks there's something over here he wants to check out I think. If she's not doing it all the time, cherish her companionship for what it is. You definately don't want to reward her with any attention if she is screaming or being naughty in any way.

So do you pick him up when he asks for it? I guess I can pick her up if she's being acceptable (little begging "quorks") but not if she screams. Makes sense to me!

 

[MickeysMom]

Our birds (with the exception of Chiquita, who came to us clipped, but will be flighted once she molts) are fully flighted.....so if they are out of the cages, and want attention...they fly to us...when they've had enough...they fly back to the cage or stand....if we need to do something they can't be involved in, we put them in the cage until we are done....

They are a lil spoiled....lol, but seem to divide their time between us, and doing other things....so I think if she's being good,not screaming etc....you probably can't overdo it if you give attention when she wants it... (within reason of course)

 

[ruffledfeathers]

Georgie was like this, and you said it right "attention addict". I'm glad to know other people have a hard time finding the balance. She could be demanding and it was never enough. Maybe i did spoil her a little bit but.....

Ultimately i went with -- if she was being sweet and appropriately asking for attention, i gave in to her and if she was being a total beast (LOL) i would ignore her. I did often try to give her the chance to be good. Like if she was a BEAST and i knew she wanted attention i tried to set up a situation where she would be able to do what i wanted, so i could reward her and THEN give the attention. Otherwise i really felt i was creating a monster. A cute monster.

 

[henpecked]

Wow that title got my attention. I could write a book , but i won't. The secret is, give attention when they ask, but keep it short. Stop before they want you to.Leave them wanting your attention but you controlling the situation. If they keep demanding, give them more than what they want. Then they;ll step up to their perch when you ask the first time. If they don't want to, pet them more intensely, spread their wings,give them more attention then they want.Then ask them to go back to their perch, they're happy too.You have to set the rules, they're happy to know the rules and be part of the flock.They're happiest with a strong leader.

 

[Eloy]

If you want the bird to be in your family you could never give enough of attention.
The most normal thing for the bird/family member is to be with you 24/7.

I don't understand why you all have birds and want them away from you when it's normal for them to be with you all the time.
If they want your attention they fly to you, that you have to accept.

 

[Autumn]

Give attention when you can