It's been a while...

First of all I would like to thank everyone here for the great info that has guided me through life with my lovely parrots.

The fateful day was September 2, 2012. I've no one to talk to that gets me, and I feel posting here may help my heart.

On February 23, 2012, after months of seeing a Maroon Belly conure at my local Petco, we decided to bring him home. I still remember his curious, in awe face as he walked out of his carrier onto our home's floor. We clicked instantly. He was, and is still, my baby. I never felt so satisfied in my life. We named him Mittoo.

Late August, Mittoo seemed to have a seizure or some sort of night fright around 2-3 AM one night. Mittoo started sleeping a lot. His poop was always off since we got had him from a regular parrot's, but it started having yellow liquid with it. He stopped eating and was puffy. I was so confused and worried. Until today, I still think I waited too long. I was on crutches at the time, and dependent on my family. After a short while, I convinced them to take me to the vet. I still remember the car ride with him there.

We arrived at the vet. Long story short, the assessment was bleak but the vet kept things hopeful. He had a bacterial infection. Knowing Mittoo's past history with his poop, the vet said the root cause was probably congenital defects. We went home with some antibiotics.

The antibiotics looked to be working. Mittoo got his appetite back and became more active. He wanted to interact with everyone in the family, when previously all he wanted was me. I called the vet and told him the good news. It all was short-lived.

On September 2, 2012, I woke up to a family member screaming for me to wake up. Mittoo's hospital box was near my bed. She had taken Mittoo out. She tells me he took a few steps and dropped. It's all so clear yet so blurry to me. It all happened so fast. He was in my hands, with one of his legs tucked in, looking paralyzed from one side. I still remember his eyes being so wide and him gasping for breath. His body jumped and his wing fluttered for a second, and then he was motionless.

A huge part of me died that day. I miss him so much. The anonymity of the internet allows me to say this, I still cry at least once a month at night for him. I love him so much. I've dreamed of him a few times. I still remember the dream where he came back, and it was a feeling of happiness I can't explain... then I woke up. His hatchday was November 8, 2011. He never got to his first birthday.

He understood me like no other. I'm probably rambling, but I'm trying to get myself to let my emotions out. No one understands how I could be so attached to a little bird, but this little bird is my everything. It's hard to write this post as I weep every so often, but I feel it must be done.

I really appreciate anyone who took the time to read my emotional rambling. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Sometimes it's good to get feelings out. That's a very sad story. I've lost a couple birds before, but the worst so far was with Adrion the Bronze Winged Pionus I had for 8 months (she was near death and had to be euthanized at 13 months old). I cried for so long afterward. I don't quite remember how long afterward, but trust me it was a long while. It just would hit me out of the blue.

I understand how some bonds we form run so much deeper than others (regardless of animal or human), and after time, you just 'get' each other.
My oldest parrot is almost 20. I've had him all his life, and I have NEVER experienced closeness and bonding with another animal in the way that I have with Robin my very beloved Red Bellied parrot for many years. The fateful day that will inevitably come for him will near kill me. It does scare me to think, after how it hit me with Adrion, and I am much closer to Robin, and also for decades.

I hope it at least helps a little to know that someone (actually many of us here) have been through it.

parrotdaddy said:

I miss him so much. The anonymity of the internet allows me to say this, I still cry at least once a month at night for him. I love him so much.

Click to expand...

So Very Very Sorry for your loss, take solace in knowing we have all felt the pain you are feeling, everyone here will take your hand and walk with you through this painful part of your life, We can all share our stories of our lost loved ones with you, at least you will see that you are not alone, and other parrot people here care about you!

I am a mature man, what some might call a "rough and tough" type of guy
I have cried over the loss of my pets my whole life, Any "man" who says he didn't cry either does not love.... or is lying out of embarrassment....

We are struggling right now to keep one of our beloved pets alive, it's a Sphinx cat named "Ra", we have had him since he was eight weeks old, a month ago in his ninth year, out of the blue he developed a heart problem, my 22-year-old daughter looked at me and said "it's not his time yet"

I told her, The tears and pain you are feeling, only come to those who love, People who don't love, don't feel that pain... which person do you want to be?

parrotdaddy said:

No one understands how I could be so attached to a little bird, but this little bird is my everything. It's hard to write this post as I weep every so often, but I feel it must be done.
I really appreciate anyone who took the time to read my emotional rambling. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Click to expand...

We ALL understand how you could be so attached to a little bird, And by morning this thread will be FULL of Loving Responses from people all over the world that feel just like you do, We Are Parrot People !!

You can go back in the Bereavement sub and read, and you will see everyone here feels the same way, We also lost our beloved Amazon 40 years in my family late last year, The thing is, time helps to heal all wounds, here we are 8 months later looking forward to our new baby Green wing Macaw

That's the way it is for us, people that love have to keep loving!!!

And in time you will too :heart:

Joe

I am so sorry for your loss, there are stages to grief for the loss of pets as well as people. There is no right or wrong way to grieve we each do it and go through it in our own way and time. As was said though many of us here have felt that pain and this is the right place for you to be to share your thoughts and feelings.

I have never really understood people who don't bond to animals and have always been mistrustful of that kind of person frankly. When I lost my nape I swore I would have gladly traded 5 years off my life for one more day with him. We do understand.

You will never forget but each love that comes into our lives animal or person teaches us something if we let it. I would rather let that love into my heart knowing that heart break could be a part of it than to have missed out on the blessings of that love.

That's such a sad story and one I think a lot of us can relate too. I had to euthanize two cats this winter and I still think about them almost every day, despite their being old and suffering and knowing it was the right thing to do.

Feel free to share your stories, both good and bad; I know I for one would love to read them. Pyrrhura conures are a particular favorite of mine. I hope it will help you with the grieving process.

We sooo understand. Any anyone who says, "It's just a bird." is not to be listened to.

Hi. First, I would like to extend my most heartfelt condolences to you, for the loss of your baby. Secondly, I would like to add that you could not be amongst a more understanding group of people. Everyone here shares that same joy that litte Mittoo put in your heart. We all feel it with our own babies, and like you many of us have felt the anguish of losing our beloved bird. It is not understandable for anyone who has not shared that bond, and that's ok. You have scores of people here who truly understand what you are going through.

I too have lost a bird. It happened in Novemember. I miss him every day. I still dream of him. I still cry. I had to take a week off of work when Bacci died. I was overcome with grief. I do not mean to personalize the issue. What I would like to convey to you, is that there is no shame or weakness in crying for the loss of someone you loved.

I understand the despair, and the feeling of emptiness. The big hole it leaves in your life. I am sorry that you have to feel that too. I hope you feel better. I wish I could give you a hug.

I can't thank you folks enough! I understand I'll be bothered always, but that's how I'll keep my baby still close to me. I guess talking with people who can relate really does help. You folks are Mittoo and I's family forever :21: . Thank you again from the bottom of my heart.

Here's a cute story about my little Mittoo that warms me up. Whenever we'd open him up, he'd immediately close his cage doors and make it clear to us that he doesn't want to go back until bedtime. I love you and miss you forever my little baby.