Migi.oso.priti
New member
Preface: I've had migi for 5 years now. He's my best friend. He's had behavioral issues in the past but we've always gotten over those humps. I've done plenty of research online so I think I may already know a lot of the answers I'm looking for, but I'm reaching out in hopes of getting some more experienced insight.
First of all, some drastic life changes took place recently. I married my long term girlfriend (she loves Migi too, but sadly she's taking the bigger hit in this situation) and we moved in together in a new apartment in Brooklyn. I've kept my job until the end of this month on Long Island and I'm very busy out there, so I usually stay multiple days in a row. I'm back every weekend, but right off the bat, Migi is dealing with some uncertain abandonment issues - as far as his perspective goes. It makes me very sad..
My saint of a wife has been caring for him while I'm gone, but unsurprisingly, they're not bonded. His vocal behavior has been off the charts bad. I've met many birds and I would have to argue that Migi is a contender as far as stubborn screaming goes. He will. not. stop. My wife teaches music lessons online at home and she paints as well - we can imagine how persistent squawking in these situations would feel.
I keep explaining that ignoring the yelling and having patience is key. I know it is, and I know the sweet lovable bird is still there - he's just confused. I leave my job at the end of the month and I'll be around more then. I'm hoping things will begin to get easier. But I'm really trying to take my wife's sanity into account - if he's this bad when I'm home, I can only imagine what she's putting up with while I'm gone. I would like to tell you things I've tried and maybe see if anyone has some suggestions for things that have worked for them.
Some clear issues:
- Attention screaming, all hours, very persistent.
- Attachment issues. Every time I get up, turn my back, walk away, shut various doors - even the slightest movements, I don't even have to leave the room - all are met with panicked screaming. Very difficult to talk him down to a point where I can walk away.
- Territorial flying. He will purposely fly to positions we can't reach and scream at us from a distance. Attempts to retrieve are met with taking a couple steps backward, sometimes even a bite if he's angry. If I give up and decide to leave him alone, he will panic scream as I turn my back. I'm not a fan of clipping, but have done so in the past as it was necessary for retraining.
Some things I've tried and his response:
- I recently purchased a full spectrum UV light from M&M Cage Company, as his cage is away from windows and I read that a certain amount of proper lighting could promote health and encourage more comfortable behavior. So far he seems weary of it and has been sitting on the perch furthest away from it - this is not a usual hangout spot. He calms down and rests here though. Whenever he finds himself directly under the light, he doesn't stick around long, and so far it just doesn't seem like something he's actually enjoying. Give it a chance, or nix it? (the thing was 70 bucks...)
- I've spent small fortunes on toys only to largely see them go ignored and eventually covered in poop. He only seems to be very responsive to mirrors, but too much mirror time has also been a negative thing in the past. I'm thinking of limiting the mirror to only playtime, however I'm positive such a move will be met with much backlash.
- He is hilariously unresponsive to clicker training. A seed or peanut is not enough incentive for him to attempt to grasp the concept of why a chopstick might be in front of his face.
- On the rare occasion that ignoring the yelling has worked, my attempts at praising the silence are often met with hissing and the threat of an open beak. "You dare ignore me?" he says..
- I have tried avi-calm at some people's suggestion, I don't notice much of an effect whether it be spiking his water or dusting some snacks.
- He's on a steady diet of Harrison's Lifetime - free fed (our schedules don't align with meal times) - with a small amount of sunflower-less seeds at 5pm. He's a very healthy boy. However he seems to refuse to eat unless I'm also eating (he doesn't fall for the fake eating crap). While this is cute, I think it is also a source of frustration for him when he's hungry and I'm not eating. Also, for no particular physiological reason...he appears to behave like a bit of an addict when it comes to seeds - sometimes ignoring his pellets for an entire day (he'll eat them eventually) while waiting and yelling for seeds, unaware of his 5pm schedule.
- He prefers to stay up with us until we go to bed. I know this isn't optimal for his health. I've tried earlier bedtimes, but he appears to take it as punishment. I feel bad for this, so it is not something that has ever stuck. Should I be persistent about 7-8pm bedtime? When he naturally gets tired around that time, should that be a hard and fast bedtime routine?
I'm feeling bad for my wife who does so much for me and him. Her patience is running thin and I'm often in complicated situations where I know ignoring is the answer but feel pressured to scold him. He's such a sweet boy and I really want to get back to a place where we once were. I know it's not entirely possible until my home life is a bit more stable, but I would really appreciate any advice or tips you may have that could help or expedite the process.
Thank you! - Joe and Migi
First of all, some drastic life changes took place recently. I married my long term girlfriend (she loves Migi too, but sadly she's taking the bigger hit in this situation) and we moved in together in a new apartment in Brooklyn. I've kept my job until the end of this month on Long Island and I'm very busy out there, so I usually stay multiple days in a row. I'm back every weekend, but right off the bat, Migi is dealing with some uncertain abandonment issues - as far as his perspective goes. It makes me very sad..
My saint of a wife has been caring for him while I'm gone, but unsurprisingly, they're not bonded. His vocal behavior has been off the charts bad. I've met many birds and I would have to argue that Migi is a contender as far as stubborn screaming goes. He will. not. stop. My wife teaches music lessons online at home and she paints as well - we can imagine how persistent squawking in these situations would feel.
I keep explaining that ignoring the yelling and having patience is key. I know it is, and I know the sweet lovable bird is still there - he's just confused. I leave my job at the end of the month and I'll be around more then. I'm hoping things will begin to get easier. But I'm really trying to take my wife's sanity into account - if he's this bad when I'm home, I can only imagine what she's putting up with while I'm gone. I would like to tell you things I've tried and maybe see if anyone has some suggestions for things that have worked for them.
Some clear issues:
- Attention screaming, all hours, very persistent.
- Attachment issues. Every time I get up, turn my back, walk away, shut various doors - even the slightest movements, I don't even have to leave the room - all are met with panicked screaming. Very difficult to talk him down to a point where I can walk away.
- Territorial flying. He will purposely fly to positions we can't reach and scream at us from a distance. Attempts to retrieve are met with taking a couple steps backward, sometimes even a bite if he's angry. If I give up and decide to leave him alone, he will panic scream as I turn my back. I'm not a fan of clipping, but have done so in the past as it was necessary for retraining.
Some things I've tried and his response:
- I recently purchased a full spectrum UV light from M&M Cage Company, as his cage is away from windows and I read that a certain amount of proper lighting could promote health and encourage more comfortable behavior. So far he seems weary of it and has been sitting on the perch furthest away from it - this is not a usual hangout spot. He calms down and rests here though. Whenever he finds himself directly under the light, he doesn't stick around long, and so far it just doesn't seem like something he's actually enjoying. Give it a chance, or nix it? (the thing was 70 bucks...)
- I've spent small fortunes on toys only to largely see them go ignored and eventually covered in poop. He only seems to be very responsive to mirrors, but too much mirror time has also been a negative thing in the past. I'm thinking of limiting the mirror to only playtime, however I'm positive such a move will be met with much backlash.
- He is hilariously unresponsive to clicker training. A seed or peanut is not enough incentive for him to attempt to grasp the concept of why a chopstick might be in front of his face.
- On the rare occasion that ignoring the yelling has worked, my attempts at praising the silence are often met with hissing and the threat of an open beak. "You dare ignore me?" he says..
- I have tried avi-calm at some people's suggestion, I don't notice much of an effect whether it be spiking his water or dusting some snacks.
- He's on a steady diet of Harrison's Lifetime - free fed (our schedules don't align with meal times) - with a small amount of sunflower-less seeds at 5pm. He's a very healthy boy. However he seems to refuse to eat unless I'm also eating (he doesn't fall for the fake eating crap). While this is cute, I think it is also a source of frustration for him when he's hungry and I'm not eating. Also, for no particular physiological reason...he appears to behave like a bit of an addict when it comes to seeds - sometimes ignoring his pellets for an entire day (he'll eat them eventually) while waiting and yelling for seeds, unaware of his 5pm schedule.
- He prefers to stay up with us until we go to bed. I know this isn't optimal for his health. I've tried earlier bedtimes, but he appears to take it as punishment. I feel bad for this, so it is not something that has ever stuck. Should I be persistent about 7-8pm bedtime? When he naturally gets tired around that time, should that be a hard and fast bedtime routine?
I'm feeling bad for my wife who does so much for me and him. Her patience is running thin and I'm often in complicated situations where I know ignoring is the answer but feel pressured to scold him. He's such a sweet boy and I really want to get back to a place where we once were. I know it's not entirely possible until my home life is a bit more stable, but I would really appreciate any advice or tips you may have that could help or expedite the process.
Thank you! - Joe and Migi