Bird for intellectually challenged owner

[roxynoodle]

My intellectually challenged cousin who is terrified of birds now wants one after spending the day with mine a couple of weeks ago. I have a lot of concerns with her having one though. First, she has zero patience and I worry she is not emotionally equipped to deal with one. She also has a tendency to not shut doors. So I worry that she won't shut the cage door, and I know she doesn't shut doors in her house. So the bird could fly out and be lost right away. But, if it is clipped it's likely going fall victim to one of the family's many dogs or cats.

She is asking my uncle who brought her here to take her to get a budgie. Of course one that is hand raised from a breeder would be a lot easier for her to deal with as I just don't see her having the patience to train a parent raised one from Petco or wherever. She is the type who gets angry very quickly if something is work and just walk away from it.

I told my uncle maybe a couple of finches (same sex so there isn't any breeding) might be the best bet. She could just watch them and listen to their beeps and as long as she fed them and cleaned the cage they probably don't need a lot of mental stimulation.

I know someone here has a bird in a home with some intellectually disabled people, but I'm not sure I remember who. I think maybe Lene? I'm hoping this member sees this and can provide me with information and make suggestions. I'm also eager for ideas and suggestions from anyone else who can help.

Knowing my aunt and uncle they will just say ok and let her bring home anything she buys. They do have quite a few animals but they sure don't take very good care of them. Vets? What are those? They keep giving their old dog Tylenol for arthritis even though I keep telling them it's toxic to dogs and to give it aspirin instead. Many of their animals have met with untimely, early deaths just due to ignorance.

 

[Echo]

No birds or animals deserve to live in that house.

 

[roxynoodle]

No birds or animals deserve to live in that house.

I know, but there really isn't anything I can do about that. They just keep bringing home more and more even though they don't seem to be able to care for the ones they already have. Because they didn't want to fix their male cats, the cats spray on all the furniture and it's very disgusting. So they would rather their house get ruined than to pay for neutering. I wish I had never given them those kittens. I told them when I gave them to them to get them fixed before they were 6 months old. But, they didn't, and I didn't know at the time how the animals were going to be cared for (or rather not cared for). All I knew is people were dumping cats and kittens on me left and right and I wanted good homes for them.

And my cousin has her own money to spend. She gets SS disability money and has a job in the cafeteria of a college. So if she decides to go buy something she wants, she will if someone drives her.

 

[merlinsmom13]

Why dont you suggest fish? Take her to a pet store or an aquarium, that may win her over. I love to watch fish, I miss my aquarium.

 

[roxynoodle]

My uncle was trying to talk her into a hamster. I suggested a guinea pig or rat since they are calmer and like to be held. I don't know if that will work though as she is quite stubborn. And she is 31 years old now so she is an adult, even if she acts more like a 7 year old. An aquarium could be a good idea though, thanks, merlinsmom. I will tell him to push that with her. He has had aquariums since he was a kid and would be able to direct her to everything she needs for it.

 

[suebee]

how often do you see her?? if its regular then a simple white lie is best, tell her one of the birds is hers, but its best for it to live at your house??
as i have a feeling the need to have will wear off once she knows she has them

also great idea cold water fish/shrimps/snails etc

 

[merlinsmom13]

I have a 31yo cousin who is challenged. She makes Merlin terriblily nervous, she tries, but her movements are too uncoordinated. She has a aquarium @ her assisted living home. She loves it.

 

[lene1949]

I donated a cockatiel, Tiko to the men I work with, after he visited them over a 4-6 week period... One of the men really liked Tiko, but he is not responsible for the birds care, due to his disability... The 3 men live in a shared house with 24/7 care, and all staff are onboard in regards to Tiko's care... Tiko loves it there as he gets lots of attention, some days more than others, of course.

If he wasn't looked after the days I'm not there, I would take him back.. He's never out without full supervision, gets a good diet and necessary grooming (which I do)

If the carers of the girl will not be responsible along with the girl, I really don't think they should buy a bird of any kind... but maybe they could give it a try, Roxy, if you buy the bird, and take it back if it doesn't work out - like I do.

 

[MikeyTN]

My thought on the aquarium is IF they're not caring for their current animals. Whose doing the water change and prevent over feeding? Do they understand to cycle the tank first before sticking a bunch of fish within the tank? I value the fish's life as much as any of my animals...

 

[mnkeastman]

This is the same girl you were talking about a couple weeks ago I am assuming, if so get her something that bites, as soon as it happens you will have a new bird I betcha! LOL

 

[roxynoodle]

She made all my birds very, very nervous, too. The second she left they all started eating and talking and playing. I don't think she should have one either, to be perfectly honest. And I don't think my aunt and uncle understand that a bird is much different than a dog, cat or rodent.

She rarely comes here to visit so unfortunately I can't really pull off the little white lie that one is hers but lives here.

I also really don't want another bird for myself to be honest, lol! 3 keep me busy all day. So I don't really want to buy her one and then be able to take it back, nor do I want them calling me asking me to take the one they bought.

I think also in 3 years she has to move into assisted living according to SS rules, when her father turns 60. I don't know if they will allow pets. I just remembered that my mom told me about it a few weeks ago.

Yeah, all the way around I feel it's a horrible idea, especially a bird. She already has 2 dogs and several cats so it's not like she needs any more pets at all.

I told my uncle on the phone last night not to do it, but he is mentally ill so between them, I just see this happening and going very badly. When you put a mentally ill person together with one who is intellectually disabled, bad things happen sometimes. Neither is really capable of planning or researching things; they just live in the moment.

 

[osnyder]

Oh gosh Roxy. You did the right thing trying to dissuade your uncle. It sounds like a terrible idea for any animal to be in their care.

In some circumstances it is very therapeutic for the intellectually disabled or mentally ill to be around animals or partake in caring for them, but this only works if there is a fully functional and capable person assisting the situation. Not too different from when we take in pets and our children help take care of them, but with our kids (who are not challenged, presumably) they'll eventually be able to take on the task alone when they're older This is not always the case with the MR community or the mentally ill.

The whole situation sounds rather dysfunctional

 

[roxynoodle]

Well, I just got off the phone with my uncle and I think I've convinced him not to take my cousin out to buy a bird. Keep your fingers crossed, everyone!

 

[Mayden]

I'm really glad you were able to convince him otherwise, it really really is for the best. I always hate the idea of uneducated people getting pets (not as in haven't been to college, not educated on the animal they're getting) so for someone who's mentally challenged to get one just... makes me sad.

I get the idea that animals are good for therapy, I found all my animals helped me through my depression. Calm dogs are good for autistic people etc. It's good, but I would recommend fish for those that have someone else who can properly take care of them, they're very soothing I find. My cousin who had cerbal palsy used to love watching fake fish in a tank, he knew no different and used to love watching lights change and the fish 'swimming' around.

Sorry for rambling on ^^

 

[roxynoodle]

She doesn't NEED any pet. She has a house full of dogs and cats already. My uncle started talking again about hamsters or rabbits, etc, and I said, no, she doesn't need any of them! She can't take care of it, and she has to move into a home in 3 years. I said even a hamster she will just lose it in the house or it will be eaten by one of the dogs or cats. Pets are not toys, they are living things that deserve to be guarded by us and cared for.

 

[Doris48]

I dont know what intellectual level or age your cousin is but my son has one of these.
[ame="http://www.amazon.com/Hasbro-FurReal-Friends-Squawkers-Parrot/dp/B000OV7A62"]Amazon.com: Hasbro FurReal Friends Squawkers McCaw Parrot: Toys & Games[/ame]

And frankly I have as much fun with it as he does.So maybe?

 

[mysteryfoxes]

Animals deserve to be treated as family, not novelty items. I'm glad you were able to sway your uncle.

 

[roxynoodle]

I dont know what intellectual level or age your cousin is but my son has one of these.
Amazon.com: Hasbro FurReal Friends Squawkers McCaw Parrot: Toys & Games

And frankly I have as much fun with it as he does.So maybe?

My niece has something similar although not as realistic as that one. I will show it to them. It is fun, and I think we all like to play with it. That might be exactly what would interest her, if it repeated back what she says and everything. I think she got on the bird kick because she loved Merlin making a fart sound So I suspect now she too wants a bird that makes funny sounds.

It is hard to say what her intellectual age is. On the one hand she is like a small child, but on the other she is one of the most manipulative people I've ever met. So it's like parts of her are very developed and others are not. She did manage to cyber stalk a TV reporter she had a crush on to the point of police involvement. Her parents had to cancel internet service, and she managed to find her way into empty classrooms at school to use those computers to do it.

 

[lene1949]

Tiko has been with me for a few days, and the men has been living at a motel, while their house got painted inside...

G asked for Tiko as soon as I arrived this morning (I'd had 5 days off), and several times during the day... Tiko seems to know that G is not like me, and accept his clumsy attempts of patting him on the head... It is really cute...

The home still has got strong fumes of paint, and I'm going to leave Tiko here until next week...

G is obsessed with electronics, and after constant requests from him, he finally got an iPod.. That was in the beginning of Feb, when I came back today, it no longer works... I think Tiko could have settled him somewhat...

 

[roxynoodle]

Yes, she is also pretty obsessed with electronics. She wanted to buy a new phone when she was here, but I said no, you need to do that with your mom and dad. And I asked her about her contract and it isn't up until September. So an electronic parrot might be just the ticket. It will talk and make funny noises, but doesn't actually need cared for, it can move with her to the home down the road.

That's too bad G broke his iPod, and can't have Tiko back for awhile, Lene.