Had a panic attack today

[Kiwibird]

It's funny how sometimes life kicks you sometimes. Everything has been going so well recently, minimal stress, I've actually been feeling really positive for the first time in a long time. Alas, all good things must come to an end I guess, and my unwelcome panic attack earlier really took the cake. My mind is just flying and I just feel horrid right now.

I know I've mentioned I have a real issue with things that have bad textures or I think would have a bad texture (mainly little bits of food at the bottom of the sink or in the trash and any unexpected 'contact' with wet, slimy, sticky or gritty textures). Anyways, while I scraped a plate into the trash, my hand accidentally brushed the inside of the trashcan, which had some coffee grounds and god knows what horrific sticky/slimy/wet, but the next thing I know I am in a ball just dying a million deaths. It was absolutely nothing and sounds SO STUPID, but a switch flipped in my brain and I ended up having a full blown, crying, wrenching, couldn't breathe panic attack. I have cleaned the house top to bottom and still feel like my brain is reeling from touching that. Like something else horrifying is lurking I could accidentally touch. It's an awful feeling I've never reacted this badly. It scared my husband quite a bit, but he had to go to work and no one else was answering their phones. I don't talk very much about this issue because it's so irrational but since nothing else is helping make the panic level go down. I thought maybe sharing and seeing if anyone else has anxiety issues and suggestion for helping calm your mind after such an episode might help. Thanks for listening to my complaining.

 

[Kinny]

Oh dear.. I must agree it sounds rather silly, but no matter how silly it may be/seem it's still real. I know I have absolutely ridiculous fears etc. Like sometimes I am totally and utterly grossed out when my 3 year old tries to give me a kiss and there's drool all over her lips.. uuugh I just can't stand it sometimes! And then tiny bugs.. I will NOT rest until i have found that tiny bug and disposed of it... and i CANNOT let my skin touch my kids/babies poop.. if it does i have to scrub that spot over and over again and i still feel 'infected'. Same with smells.. only i can't scrub my insides.. i just stand there feeling infected and diseased... drives me nuts! And believe it or not there's more >.>

I don't have anxiety issues but I did have a full blown panic attack a couple of years ago and my husband had to call the Ambulance and i was taken to hospital for overnight monitoring.. Panic attacks are serious and it doesn't matter what causes them, it's very real and scary!!! *hugs*

Take a warm shower or soak in a warm bubble bath with a few snackables, then curl up on the couch and watch a happy kiddie movie do something you really enjoy (for me it would be mingling with my birds or drawing). Just chatting about nothing in particular to a friend always helps me when I'm feeling nervous, and really works for my sister-in-law/best friend (she has big anxiety issues).

Not sure if I have much more to add.. except.. RELAAAXXXX!!!! ^^ *hugs*

 

[Sterling1113]

Oh no I'm so sorry to hear. the last time I had a bad anxiety attack was when Yoshi did his first alarm siren. Of course these are two very different attacks, yours and mine, but I went for a walk outside to literally and metaphorically 'cool off'. I'm not sure if you find comfort in walks but maybe it would help put your mind at ease? I wish I had more advice to offer.

I hope you can find some peace and relax. No one can blame you for things you can't control. If you ever want to rant about your 'irrational' panic you can always send me a message. Even if I can't relate I'd still offer comfort in any way.

Hugs to you.

 

[Kiwibird]

Glad to hear I'm not the only one who has these kinds of issues. Trying to waste time online to distract myself now, but my skin is still crawling. Already went on a long walk, showed, cleaned and still feel off. I had panic attacks frequently in high school and was hospitalized once because I had one at work, but this was the first one in several years and first time I've ever gotten one over this particular issue.

All this stupid *!%$ with textures started in second grade when a girl poured a soda over my head in the lunchroom (I was never miss popular but this was one of the more 'damaging' incidents of my childhood). The school wouldn't call my mom for new clothes, so I got to wash my face/hands in the bathroom sink but thats it. When the wind kicked up at recess, dust stuck to me, so I had to sit in a sticky, damp, gritty mess all day whilst the other kids laughed and made fun of me a million times worse than they normally did. It was awful. Haven't been able to deal with those textures very well since, especially when I am not mentally prepared to touch them. UGHHHHH:52:. It's like I can't scrub hard enough to wash the feeling off and all this time just hasn't ever made it better My rational brain is in constant battle with my irrational brain over this stupid, pointless issue.

 

[RavensGryf]

April, I'm sorry to hear you had this happen . It is such a horrible thing to go through, and I think you will find after sharing, that many of us can relate!
Here... I'll even tell you my horrible story from 9 years ago to make you feel a little better

Prior to 2005, I had never had these issues. Then, one day (at night in bed) when I lived alone, I was awakened from my sleep thinking I was having a heart attack (or SOMETHING)!! I didn't even realize what it was... I lay there with my heart racing as hard and fast as it was able to without giving out! My limbs were going numb, my breathing was severely constricted... It was so hard to even move or walk, it took a few minutes to get the phone not far from my bed in the room. I called my mom. She was the opposite of thrilled that I had called and woke her in the middle of the night. I am drawing a blank here, as I honestly don't recall 9 years ago if I finally convinced her to come take me to the ER, or if I suffered til she came in the morning.

I had to walk with my arm around my mom because my legs were weak and I could barely walk. My vision was going away, I was gasping for air as if I had asthma, heart pounding so hard and fast I thought it was going to explode. At the ER I got a wheelchair, but I was still really having a hard time.

I'll NEVER FORGET a nurse that told me that "I'm going to have to calm down" ANYONE who's ever suffered from a true panic attack knows it is not something you can control... Your body systems automatically react, and if it's severe, you cannot even begin to stop it even if you try your hardest to breathe or relax. Minutes to HOURS later it will stop eventually. Or if you get a dose of anti-anxiety meds, they work pretty quickly.

For the next year or so after that (until we figured out the right meds to keep it under control permanently) I had some attacks at the most inopportune times, anywhere from mild (which is ALMOST controllable) to severe, though never quite as severe as the first one. I would also at times go down on the floor and NEARLY PASS OUT... At work, which was no good to say the least. It was like a different kind of panic attack? Again, no obvious stressor... I'd just be doing normal stuff then bam! All of a sudden without warning it would hit me. It actually got so bad, I had to quit working for a few couple months. My mom took care of me at her house in an emergency for about a month. I couldn't climb stairs even slowly without my heart racing and almost passing out. I was actually AFRAID to shower and do anything but a sponge bath for the first couple weeks.

During this time at my mom's, about A MONTH I had to leave my apartment with Robin (only bird at the time) alone! I was literally SO weak, my dad would pick me up and take me to my apartment to see Robin and clean his cage and give pellets and water. I was so weak I couldn't even say hi to Robin. I just laid on my bed half dead while my dad did the cage.
Thank God 9 years ago my parents were still strong enough to help me!
...And Robin was THE BEST LITTLE PARROT EVER!!!! He was such a trooper. He didn't complain, didn't throw a fit when I came back, didn't pluck, didn't develop ANY behavioral problems, and Robin was essentially living alone for a month!!! Of course only because of my emergency unexpected illness.

ANYWAY, sorry to get off track, but my symptoms were from BAD anxiety. It's controlled nowdays thank goodness.

I hope you are feeling better tonight. Take it easy