college partner work nightmare

[Lintini]

I have had the biggest nightmare with working on a partner blog with this girl in my "film: sport culture class" I get credit for two areas with this class so that is why I took it.

I partnered up with a girl who I would normally not associated with but she seemed nice enough. I am a bit of a tom boy, I play in brass bands with all men, and enjoy the outdoors, don't really wear makeup, and my favorite clothes are jeans and star wars t shirts that I find in the mens section at Target.........yea. ...so this girl I partner up with is the complete opposite of me but hey that's okay...it's just a partner blog project for the class.

So we pick the film chariots of fire for our blog. Turns out that we both do not like the film but....too late.

She is obsessed with meeting up to talk about the blog. I am working full time, I play french horn and tenor horn in 4 groups, I go to college full time...it's crunch time because I am done next quarter, and I am also juggling time with my fiance, pets, and friends....oh and a wedding that I am planning for in August 2014. (notice how pets come before friends lol) My only day off is Saturday. I am literally none stop all day till 10pm. So, I really don't have time to meet up, but I have time to talk on the phone. She has been completely unwilling to talk on the phone, and has ignored my text messages. And everytime I ask if she is free...no response.

I cannot believe how bad things have gone today....she started insulting me in text messages and was really belittling me. She tried to say that my lifestyle is to wait till the last minute....when she is the one who won't respond. We also had no class on Monday for veterans day so tell me why she wasn't free then??? She tried to tell me that she works three jobs and also takes classes at a different college ......When I work 40 hours a week, take 18 units, take care of my pets, I have to rehearse for hours, I have my recital coming up where I play solo horn for 30 min......like please don't try to tell me you work 3 jobs that take up 40 hours a week.

Ughhh check out these emails I had to send to my professor. I feel like I am in highschool again......this girl is RIDICULOUS. I am 27 years old......I seriously have NO TIME for this drama.

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This is the email I sent my teacher last week:
Hello Professor,

I've been meaning to want to talk to you. I don't know if I am over analyzing things but last week you and Alayna walked out from a different room while I was outside and I felt as if you both gave me a surprised look, as if she went to you to speak about me. She then acted funny all of class and didn't talk to me as usual. I thought it could be coincidental and that I couldn't imagine why she would want to talk to you about our group work. Now I could be completely off base here but I then text her that night to see if she wanted me to post my response on hers as a comment, add it or just create a new wiki and she didn't respond. I then text her and asked if she was angry with me, since she wasn't acting herself to me in class. She didn't make eye contact with me during group discussion. We text a lot to each other in the previous weeks so it was very unlike her to not respond to me. I don't understand why she isn't responding to me. Our schedules did not line up to meet outside of class, so we 'texted' a lot and said that we can just talk on the phone about it. She then told me she was sick so we never spoke about the movie over the phone, just texted each other. I just don't understand what the problem is, I work full time and play in four different ensembles, I don't have time to meet out of class, when she was free I wasn't, and when I was free she wasn't...but I might just be completely wrong here and that isn't even what she is upset about. Maybe she just missed all of my texts but we need some communication happening. I've never had this problem before in group work and I just think it's a little strange. I was really irritated the last class because I thought she went to you to talk bad about me since I waited until Wednesday to post but Tuesday night BB was down and she wasn't responding to me so am I just paranoid or do I need to work this out some other way? I don't mean to bother you about this, but I was half expecting an email from you asking what was going on since you sent out some emails about partners having issues so maybe I am just paranoid that she is mad that I didn't post my response sooner??


Thanks for your time

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From my professor:
Hi Lindsey,

I was hoping to catch up with you in class today - about your email from yesterday.

Yes, Alayna and I did speak briefly about the partner project - given that we both had concerns. I understand that your schedule/life is hectic and quite busy - my sense is other students have similar stories to share about the many constraints on their time. With that said, I'm hopeful that over the next week you and Alayna can find an agreed upon strategy to tackle the next stage of the project. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to further your efforts.

In the meantime, I appreciated your presence and comments in class today. I look forward to the remaining weeks of the quarter.

Professor Liberti

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The email I had to send today:

Hi again,

Things with Alayna have really gone downhill and she started getting very rude with me and insulted me.

I made plans to stay down in the bay area this weekend to work with her and she was busy Saturday and wanted to work Sunday morning, and then I was called into work early on Sunday because 2 people called in sick. I text her Saturday to let her know and I never heard back from her until Sunday afternoon when she told me that she was busy with an event in SF. So I then asked if we could just talk on the phone Sunday, Monday, or even Tuesday to talk about it. I got no response from her until tonight. She then started insulting me and telling me that my lifestyle is to wait until the last minute to do things, which I have been more than available to use the phone with her all week. She is unwilling to use the telephone for some reason. She has been very rude and said that she has done all the work on this project which is untrue and makes absolutely no sense. She just sent messages to me saying that she has three jobs and taking classes at Ohlone. She is trying to belittle me. She was well aware that I work full time and preform in 4 different orchestras, where I too drive to Ohlone College two times a week for rehearsals. Saturday is my only free day off, but I have time to talk on the phone during the evening or on my lunch breaks. I am completely baffled why she is so dead set on meeting in person since we are both busy, when we could just pick up the phone. Now I am extremely stressed out and feel like I am back in high school. I have tried to be available, but I am very sick and tired of her not responding to me and then insulting me in text messages. She completely ignored me all week prior to this which I emailed you about. I do not know how this project is going to work and I am embarrassed that this drama is happening to be honest. I do not look forward to having to deal with her tomorrow in class.

I can send you the screen shots of the messages as proof since she see's this in an entirely different light and that it's "all my fault."

I feel really stupid for even having to email a college professor about this. Sorry for all the trouble.

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Now the professor wants to talk to us before class, where I am in rehearsal OF COURSE....so wow, Alayna gets to ***** about me when I am not there.

I am so irratated, I do not need this in my life and this is why you DO NOT make partner work in COLLEGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.



Ideas? Help...stress overload. What is this girls problem???

She was seriously RUDE to me in texts, she told me to reread her texts and to get facts straight.......oh and the part I loved was when she told me to drop my attitude.,.... I have been nothing but nice and wow.....attitude in a text??? It's a text............ IF SHE PICKED UP HER PHONE TO ACTUALLY TALK ......omgggggggggggg I seriously don't have time for this I cannot believe I am actually fighting with a girl in a college class. This is .........INSANE.

 

[Lintini]

Please anyone offer me some advice, I have to deal with this turd tomorrow afternoon and I am dreading it!

 

[Lintini]

33 views. please I could use advice even if you think I am wrong, I need to get thru this project with this crazy girl. Even if you think I am being a turd, please, I need to know!!!!

 

[Klaery]

Suck it up. That sounds horrible I know and I do feel for you in this situation but you just have to do the best you can with what you have. We all go through times of having to work with people that we really don't get on with but you just have to get on with it. Think of it this way, it could be worse. A LOT worse.

Your lecturer knows the situation so just do what you can, work as hard as you can on your part of it and let be what will be.

Does this count for much of your overall exit grade?

 

[Lintini]

Thank you,

I have felt in general to just not care, do my part and suck it up.

This grade is for both of us, I have not turned anything in late.

I work with plenty of people that I do not like, but Alayna communicated with me to work alone, which is not what the teacher wants at all.

I do want to suck it up, I have much more drama than to be told to just suck it up........sorry I already knew I was going to be told to have to just suck it up..................I felt like I just needed to ignore her and just do my own thing you know??? But the teacher want's us integrating our info.........blah!!!!!

 

[Lintini]

It's just insane to be in a college class dealing with this, I am so confused, mad, stressed, irritated, angry, etc etc

 

[Lintini]

I do appreciate the response and thank you. I have to give a group presentation tomorrow and she is in it so I just need to be strong and not care about her.

 

[thekarens]

That's a tough one and not fair to you, but if I were you I'd do my best to get through it anyway you can and remember once you're done you won't have to deal with her again. Even if you end up having to do the majority of the work it's better than failing the grade.

 

[crimson]

use your calendars and schedule a time you can both meet.
focus at the task at hand, putting petty differences aside(more her than you

I think she thought you were 'dissing' her in the beginning, due to your hectic life, and she felt like you weren't making time for her.... that's just my two cents.

I know first hand you are a very positive, outgoing happy person, rise above it and chalk it up to a learning lesson in life....don't let her get to you!!

good luck with today, I know it must be difficult.

 

[Lintini]

Thank you

We were pulled out of class to talk, and she was extremely snobby and wouldn't make eye contact with me. She thinks that emailing me 3 links from "googling" Chariots of Fire Critic Review is her doing all of the work apparently....she tried to tell the professor that she sent me "All of her research" LOL ......

I asked her if she wanted me to respond to any of her questions she asked in her blog, and with much attitude she told me to do whatever I wanted then rolled her eyes at me. She's a total Witch with a B.

I cannot wait for this crud to be over with.......it's like she's 15 years old or something. It's just so strange to be in a california state college class and be dealing with anything like this. I'm still shaking my head in disbelief. I have never had a problem like this before, even at my job where sometimes you have issues with your coworkers??? no.....I never have experienced something like this before.

 

[Birdy916]

Linsdey, I myself would just do what I had to do to get it over with, either dealing with that person or even if that meant doing the entire project myself...

I would want to be seen as "the bigger person" in the Prof eyes, without me even having to draw attention to it...

Let the other person be the whiny complainer, and you just turn in a top-notch report, a college Prof should have enough intelligence to see what the real problem is in a situation like that...

Good luck, and Chariots of Fire actually aint that bad of a movie...

 

[Lintini]

I am trying, it was a bit rough in class today, I had really bad anxiety especially as she sat next to me and how she acted with the professor.

This blog project is so stupid. We have to work together to make sure we write the same things and touch on the same subjects. I am looking at all of the class blogs right now and I am seeing editing/posting being done until the due date time of 12 midnight.

The entire thing is stupid, I cannot believe that this is even happening ....I try to be the bigger person but it's still like what the heck is the issue. Why can't you just pick up the phone and chat or just text or email? It's not that hard, it's a super simple blog project.

And.....Chariots is a pretty lame movie!!! It was actually really fake when they said it was a real story!~

 

[Birdy916]

lol, loosely based on....

 

[Lintini]

guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 

[wink]

Why are you people even talking about this on this site??????????

 

[Mike17]

Why are you people even talking about this on this site??????????

Forum title: "Off Topic". As with several other forums I associate with, there is a section where people can ask for (and on this forum at least) receive polite replies and advice. Or members discuss issues of concern to them, just as Lintini has done. Or current affairs are discussed (with the usual proviso that politics and religion can be inflammatory so best shied away from ).

 

[getwozzy]

That chick sounds like a NIGHTMARE to deal with!! SO sorry you're dealing with that I know as much as it sucks to be stuck in a project with her, you'll have to just fake it till ya make it! Easier said than done sometimes, I know...but, like others have suggested- be the better person and get it done...make the attempts to meet up with her or at least call her and leave her voicemails so at least you're putting forth the effort on your end.

Maybe she thought you guys would be BFF's after becoming work partners for some reason lol

 

[Caesar]

Id slap her rolling eyes out of her dim-witted head......
(That's a Aussie thing).
No but I agree just remember that she in the big picture is only a spec of dust that you will be rid of soon as you pass or graduate.