Goodbye Babygirl

[jodieflo]

I can't have children due to a hysterectomy when i was young. I decided to buy an Orange winged Amazon as a life companion to fufill the gap in my life. Recently she suddenly became ill. As it was bank holiday, I couldn't find an avian vet, i tried 4 different counties. Normal vets didn't want to know due to lack of experience 'their words'. Unfortunately, at only eight years old, she died in my arms that night. it is the most heart wrenching experience of my entire life. I don't have a human flock, parents etc and I can't create my own. So Marlie and my dogs are my family and I have just lost a member of my family. The grief is overwhleming, even more than when my partner died suddenly.
Marlie had the best of everything, food, fresh and dry, toys, the biggest cage on the market, tons of attention and love but can't help blaming myself or wondering if I did something wrong. I have no idea how she died. In my grief and haziness I just wanted to bury her.
No one seems to understand the close relationship between human and parrot and the strong bond that Marlie and I had.
Marlie was an exception and the a perfect parrot and such a good little girl. She had never bitten anybody. She had never been destructive ever. Although fully flighted, she chose not too and was the most placid parrot I have ever met (I used to work in a reptile and parrot shop, so have met plenty). For most of her life she was a boy, she was sold as male. Last year she laid 2 eggs so luckily she had a unisex name.
Boy or girl, I loved Marlie more thatn anything in the world and she was my little ray of sunshine in my tragedy filled life and I don't know how to start to overcome her going. My friends suggest speaking to a bereavement counsellor but I don't want to be ridiculed by their lack of understanding.

 

[nofearengineer]

Jodie, I'm so sorry to hear about poor Marlie. While it is good to wonder what was the reason for her passing on, please don't blame yourself for it. It sounds like you gave her a wonderful life. We will never know why some of the most beautiful of God's creatures, both human and non-human die so young. Sometimes it is just a congenital thing that goes undiscovered, or just a freak accident.

Missing her means you loved her. It will get better with time, though you will always miss her, even if you're no longer bawling over it every day (I know all about that.)

Feel free to let us know all about your life with Marlie. A good friend should be remembered.

 

[wuvzbirdies]

Hi there.

My heart breaks for you, I do know exactly what you are going through as I recently lost my best bud also. Unlike you I do know why he died and it doesn't make it any easier so please don't beat yourself up as it wasn't your fault. I did see a grief counselor for a few weeks and it was a little helpful, but I found volunteering my time at a local aviary has really helped me with my grief.

This entire forum is extremely understanding of what you are feeling, they certainly have helped in my time of need when no one in my personal life would so you've come to the right place.

I wish you well and hope you keep in touch to let us know how you're doing.

 

[Don Sharma]

Did you legally adopt the dog together?
If so, is your boyfriend in a better position to be able to look after the dog?
Did you decide that a clean break was better for the dog?

If so, then yes it will be painful to say goodbye after a bond has been formed. Perhaps you might want to have a favourite picture framed, put in a locket later or on a mug. I have picture mugs for all my dogs that have gone ahead. Done after the sharpest pain was over.

If you are acting in the best interests of your dog, the happy memories you shared will be a comfort later.

 

[SharonC]

I am so sorry. Take comfort in the fact that she had a wonderful life....

 

[HRH Di]

I'm so sorry. You'll get tons of empathy and understanding here.

Most bereavement counselors understand that it's just as heart-wrenching to lose a beloved parrot, dog, cat, etc. as anyh other member of the family. So don't automatically expect ridicule. It may be good to look into something like that.

Or, you can always stop in here and share with us.

 

[cnyguy]

So sorry to hear of your sad loss. I understand how heartbreaking it is to lose a much-loved parrot, as do many Forum members. You and Marlie are in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Andrea_AUST]

Mmm...24 hours into owning my first parrot and I do believe I can already feel my heart being stolen. Death is just so tragic - lost my only child a few years ago and my animals are also my life. Each takes a little peace of me and leaves me a big piece of their spirit.