Your posts about Puck always reminded me so strongly of Beaker, my Pionus, who I also lost suddenly, several months ago.
I am so sorry for your loss. I am always amazed at how such a little feathery creature can leave such a big hole in your world.
I will always miss my "Beaker-buddy" & think of him often. But after a while, I began to think of him with a smile, albeit a sad one.
Here's hoping you get to that place son, which is better than the earlier shock of loss.
These guys are so smart - Puck knew how good he had it with you. You gave him a great life, for the time you had him.