I cant choose

[Mayden]

My gutt reactions are often overly emotional, can be harsh and I tend to be a little too quick to jduge, I'll admit. Based on the info supplied, I struggled to understand the reasoning behind Misty's decisions. Perhaps she can give us more info?

I disagree that we don't need to know the reason for rehoming her bird - how can we make recommendations without knowing the details? Granted, there are many many people on here with a lot more experience that I have but I've had my Percy for four months and I have made definate progress so I do feel I have some insights to share - especially considering how difficult my relationship with Percy was in the beginning.

I wouldn't give him up or give up on him after just a few months. From Misty's earlier posts, it seems that she's not had her lovie a long time. Did she give him enough time?

Sorry if I was harsh, I am just thinking of the poor birdie

Many people here instantly jump and 'attack' with the welfare of the bird at the forefront, which is understandable - we're all bird lovers here. But what people forget is that the person we're speaking to, is the bridge between us and that bird, ensuring that the welfare can maybe be improved, challenging behaviour tackled, etc. But we can't do that without the owner on board - who wants to stick around when all you're met with is frustration and anger from people? (As justified as it may be sometimes!)

Take some time to learn more about the person, coax them out of their shell, tell them that it's okay to ask for help, or feel helpless, but we can help them if they let us.

I want to know more about Mistys situation and the issues with the lovie. Maybe we can help.

 

[JerseyWendy]

Thank you, Cat!!! I truly LOVE your kind hearted nature!!!! You lead by example!!!

And Echo, THANK YOU for digging deeper!!!!

To Misty, please don't leave. I'm fairly certain I speak for everyone when I say we didn't know all the facts, and probably still don't, had Echo not looked up your previous posts.

 

[MomtoPercy]

My gutt reactions are often overly emotional, can be harsh and I tend to be a little too quick to jduge, I'll admit. Based on the info supplied, I struggled to understand the reasoning behind Misty's decisions. Perhaps she can give us more info?

I disagree that we don't need to know the reason for rehoming her bird - how can we make recommendations without knowing the details? Granted, there are many many people on here with a lot more experience that I have but I've had my Percy for four months and I have made definate progress so I do feel I have some insights to share - especially considering how difficult my relationship with Percy was in the beginning.

I wouldn't give him up or give up on him after just a few months. From Misty's earlier posts, it seems that she's not had her lovie a long time. Did she give him enough time?

Sorry if I was harsh, I am just thinking of the poor birdie

Many people here instantly jump and 'attack' with the welfare of the bird at the forefront, which is understandable - we're all bird lovers here. But what people forget is that the person we're speaking to, is the bridge between us and that bird, ensuring that the welfare can maybe be improved, challenging behaviour tackled, etc. But we can't do that without the owner on board - who wants to stick around when all you're met with is frustration and anger from people? (As justified as it may be sometimes!)

Take some time to learn more about the person, coax them out of their shell, tell them that it's okay to ask for help, or feel helpless, but we can help them if they let us.

I want to know more about Mistys situation and the issues with the lovie. Maybe we can help.

Well put, Mayden. Next time, I will take a breath before I fly off the handle

 

[GaryBV]

I have re-read all of the posts, including mine, and I don't see anything 'mean' or any that have 'attacked' Misty. Misty in her first post implies she knows she is going to get some pushback, then says she's getting rid of her lovebird, and quite possibly is getting ANOTHER. The fault isn't ours (or if you want, MINE) for speaking our/my mind, it is Misty's for not explaining her actions on a site dedicated to the care of parrots. Sometimes people need told the truth rather than sugar coat it. My intention wasn't to be 'mean' but to point out the inconsistency of her actions. In my life I know that I have 'learned' a lot more from my mistakes than I have any easy successes and I have learned more from people who disagree with me than 'yes people.' I don't think any of us said anything wrong to Misty and certainly didn't 'attack' her - and if she thinks her reasons about getting rid of her lovebird are too 'personal' - however that can be, that is her business but I do not HAVE to understand it or accept that reasoning. Nor do you.

 

[Mayden]

I have re-read all of the posts, including mine, and I don't see anything 'mean' or any that have 'attacked' Misty. Misty in her first post implies she knows she is going to get some pushback, then says she's getting rid of her lovebird, and quite possibly is getting ANOTHER. The fault isn't ours (or if you want, MINE) for speaking our/my mind, it is Misty's for not explaining her actions on a site dedicated to the care of parrots. Sometimes people need told the truth rather than sugar coat it. My intention wasn't to be 'mean' but to point out the inconsistency of her actions. In my life I know that I have 'learned' a lot more from my mistakes than I have any easy successes and I have learned more from people who disagree with me than 'yes people.' I don't think any of us said anything wrong to Misty and certainly didn't 'attack' her - and if she thinks her reasons about getting rid of her lovebird are too 'personal' - however that can be, that is her business but I do not HAVE to understand it or accept that reasoning. Nor do you.

I assure you, I am not a 'yes person' and neither do I tolerate any form of attacking or bullying of anyone. Which is what these type of threads seem to evoke. I try to stay awake but I can't sit back and not intervene when people are being unfairly persecuted - which in turn puts birds at risk. I'm sure the mods are forever having field days with my 'attitudes' on here, but nethertheless...

You are saying that she is not taking parronthood seriously - that is a serious insult and attack to someone who does care. Which Misty might very well do, but feels that her lovie is better suited to another home - and her better suited to another bird that isn't as 'fiesty' as her current lovie.

Yes she did say she wanted another lovie perhaps - BUT instead of explaining that she's probably just as likely to meet the same issues again, people jumped down her throat about it.

You didn't give her a chance, just outright said 'no I wont help'. No 'please try and tell us why you dont think you can keep your lovie?'

If you don't want to help, get off the thread and leave these topics to people who do.

This is exactly the type of thing thats made me want to take a long break.

 

[Mayden]

+ to add to that. There's mocking in the form of the fake budgie/encouraging.

There's no need, it's adding insult to injury and I know I'd have taken off by that point too.

 

[getwozzy]

I think everyone needs to take a chill pill; instead of bashing someone for doing something, why not take the opportunity to help a fellow parront. We're all here to learn from one another, so be nice to each other and share your knowledge.

Misty15 I hope that you do stick around, because despite the harshness of some posters, we all really just want to help you. If you give more details about what's going on with your lovie we will gladly try to help you.

 

[Misty15]

Thank you for the nicer replys. I understand your concerns and will post more info. However i don't have any time right now and will try to write later today.

 

[Echo]

+ to add to that. There's mocking in the form of the fake budgie/encouraging.

There's no need, it's adding insult to injury and I know I'd have taken off by that point too.

The fake Budgie made me crack up I have to admit! She said she wants a bird that's pretty, snugly and quiet! Here you go LOL.
I really didn't see it as a mean mocking but maybe that's because I have noticed the humor of this member in previous threads and it's never ill spirited.

 

[Misty15]

Alright,
Firstly, I want to apologize for the angry post i should have held my temper in check better than that. Secondly, the reason for the angry post was because i was really hurt especially over the fake budgie and the "you don't take parrothood seriously" and the like. I LOVE parrots! Every spare moment of time i have is spent reading, researching, or watching parrots. I know a bit about them. I realize my first post was not well thought out. I should have put more time into writing it i kind of just threw my unorganized thoughts at the screen. Sorry.
so
About Misty… I have had her for a year and three months or about that. I am rather young (sorry i am not giving personal info on the internet so don't ask) and did not do all the research i should have when buying her (actually i probably did read everything i needed to know but i think i was a little selective about what i took to heart) and i was concerned over money ( that is not a problem now ) so i pretty much found a cheap lovebird and went to go buy. I arrived the lady spoke English with a very heavy accent and i was sorry for the bird and bought even though they were kept in bad conditions and seemed to never have seen a human before. ( I was much more confident in myself as a parrot trainer back then ... much more than was reasonable anyhow.) I brought her home to a huge cage with toys, changed her diet over time to pellets. She started out feisty and as time went as i tried to train her all that happened was she lost he fear of people and started biting. she bites hands sticks dogs tails if they get too close anything. I tried training her out of it. She hated me. when i let her out she makes a bee line for my hands and tried to kill them. I have to wear garden gloves when i clean the cage. And she has mastered the art of shredding paper to such an art as to make it impossible to let her out when i work. Target training failed and just trying to get her to stop trying to kill me failed. (yes i did go to square one and sitting next to the cage talking to her.)
She will be happier elsewhere trust me. I have not told you half the the troubles i have had. I want to get a new bird and one that i have actually have a nice relationship with. While i like the idea of a lovebird i don't want to do anything like that again and i like the lager size of the GCCs. From what i have read they are more snuggly and hands on when properly raised and trained. Thank you.
Ill post more tomorrow if i have time but i have to run now.

I hope i put more thought into that post.

 

[GaryBV]

You are saying that she is not taking parronthood seriously - that is a serious insult and attack to someone who does care. Which Misty might very well do, but feels that her lovie is better suited to another home - and her better suited to another bird that isn't as 'fiesty' as her current lovie.

Yes she did say she wanted another lovie perhaps - BUT instead of explaining that she's probably just as likely to meet the same issues again, people jumped down her throat about it.

You didn't give her a chance, just outright said 'no I wont help'. No 'please try and tell us why you dont think you can keep your lovie?'

If you don't want to help, get off the thread and leave these topics to people who do.

This is exactly the type of thing thats made me want to take a long break.

Alright Mayden, you've had your say and although you have professed how nice you want people to be you have come at me pretty hard here. Fine. If you believe that saying someone doesn't take their parronthood seriously is a 'seriouis insult' and an ATTACK, I'm sorry but that is just ridiculous. It's neither, it simply is my opinion, nothing more, nothing less. To make more out of it is simply silly. I never said Misty is a horrible person, or anything that is an attack.

Frankly, you can't speak for Misty - she never said any of the things you said in your post, in fact, she never explained herself at all, so you really aren't posting with any real authority because everything you are saying about Misty is simply conjecture and guesswork. To avoid all of this crap all Misty had to do, and still can cause I see she is still 'here,' is to explain why she's getting rid of a a lovebird but still may get another, it's not rocket science, and that would have alleviated all of this mess. That would have been the mature thing to do, and the responsible thing. I'm not interested in having any passive/aggressive fight with you or anyone on here.

I don't want to hurt anybody, or hurt people's feelings, but if you are going to ask publicly for advice or post publicly, then you best be prepared to be responsible for what you say and for the consequences, that's what adults do. And sometimes being critical of what someone has done or said IS helping that person - you know life is not all sunshine and butterflies. While we're on the subject of accountability - I think you owe Blueridge an apology for your comments about his post of pretty polly - it was a JOKE, it was funny, and I'm not the only one who appreciated it. It was spot on and I'm sorry you can't see that. Just remember that other people are just as entitled to their opinion as you are to yours, and that includes me. I disagree with much you have said, and I have responded politely without 'attacks' and no ill will is intended.

And Misty - why don't you explain why you are getting rid of one lovebird while considering getting another so that we do understand the situation and you can help close out this thread that has become overheated and overblown.

So Mayden peace to you, and peace to all the moderators lol - who are probably wondering what to do about this, and lets just move on. Agree to disagree, I'm not hositle, I'm not angry, and I take responsibility for everything I've said.

 

[GaryBV]

WOW WOW WOW

Alright,
Firstly, I want to apologize for the angry post i should have held my temper in check better than that. Secondly, the reason for the angry post was because i was really hurt especially over the fake budgie and the "you don't take parrothood seriously" and the like. I LOVE parrots! Every spare moment of time i have is spent reading, researching, or watching parrots. I know a bit about them. I realize my first post was not well thought out. I should have put more time into writing it i kind of just threw my unorganized thoughts at the screen. Sorry.
so
About Misty… I have had her for a year and three months or about that. I am rather young (sorry i am not giving personal info on the internet so don't ask) and did not do all the research i should have when buying her (actually i probably did read everything i needed to know but i think i was a little selective about what i took to heart) and i was concerned over money ( that is not a problem now ) so i pretty much found a cheap lovebird and went to go buy. I arrived the lady spoke English with a very heavy accent and i was sorry for the bird and bought even though they were kept in bad conditions and seemed to never have seen a human before. ( I was much more confident in myself as a parrot trainer back then ... much more than was reasonable anyhow.) I brought her home to a huge cage with toys, changed her diet over time to pellets. She started out feisty and as time went as i tried to train her all that happened was she lost he fear of people and started biting. she bites hands sticks dogs tails if they get too close anything. I tried training her out of it. She hated me. when i let her out she makes a bee line for my hands and tried to kill them. I have to wear garden gloves when i clean the cage. And she has mastered the art of shredding paper to such an art as to make it impossible to let her out when i work. Target training failed and just trying to get her to stop trying to kill me failed. (yes i did go to square one and sitting next to the cage talking to her.)
She will be happier elsewhere trust me. I have not told you half the the troubles i have had. I want to get a new bird and one that i have actually have a nice relationship with. While i like the idea of a lovebird i don't want to do anything like that again and i like the lager size of the GCCs. From what i have read they are more snuggly and hands on when properly raised and trained. Thank you.
Ill post more tomorrow if i have time but i have to run now.

I hope i put more thought into that post.

THANK YOU MISTY !!!! We posted at the exact time so your post wasn't up when I wrote mine. NOW things are much clearer, and that takes care of all of the issues. NOW things are clear and you don't look like such a light-weight and seem more responsible. Yes, please don't paste anything personal, nobody needs to know your age, etc., I don't like to post anything personal myself and I'm a full-grown man and recently started a thread about posting personal info - so I get it. Nothing you said there was personal or traceable and it made all the difference in the world. I'm grateful you came back and did that. Thank you so much. I think you learn a lesson there, and I have grown a bit from it as well, and maybe some of our fellow members have too. Good luck rehoming your lovebird (ps/mine are not tame either and my female parrotlet HATES me lol - but I"m ok with that because they all have each other and that's what I want) and good luck finding a new bird whatever it is.

 

[MomtoPercy]

Thank you for the further details, Misty. I see my initial post was indeed unfair and undeservedly nasty. I truly apologise for that.

 

[cassiepengo]

hey, im so glad you dint go away!! phew, i hate it when someone's upset. right, so, did you decide what bird your gonna get??

 

[artcraftychic]

Birds are not really known to be cuddly... If you want something "pretty" as a pet maybe you just have to live with an aviary type situation where your bird is there to look at rather than play with? Conures can be nippy, loud and needy as with any other bird and it's more about understanding bird behavior and proper training and bonding than getting lucky with a cuddly easy bird

So true!

 

[Mayden]

To clarify: I am in the middle of PMing GaryBM to talk about this further but take it from the thread so yet another doesn't get shut down due to attitude problems.

I'll say the rest here as it isn't directed at any one person:

I saw the thread about the plastic parrot and though "haha, funny, if only people realised!" but there is a time and a place for humor like that, and this thread was not one of them. So no one will be getting an apology for me for calling that post (and encouraging of it) mocking as it can so easily be perceived as in this context.

I'm tired of coming on here day in and day out and finding, what is usually the same people, having a go at new forum members for saying something 'wrong', usually regarding re homing or adoption. It happens in every single thread and it's disgusting. I'm tired of it, I'm done with it.

I have an awful lot more to say about this, but I'd rather PM if anyone wants to talk about it further; because I think the mods are starting to get tired of shutting down threads I appear on as they tend to get inflamed quickly. Unfortunately I know I'm not alone in my thoughts, despite what it may appear on threads. I'll respond to any PM's today.

I'm glad to see, however, that attitudes towards Misty quickly changed after she came back to explain further about her situation. I think it's safe to say that we're done discussing this now on this thread? We can all just move on to helping Misty now with rehoming her lovie and potentially picking a future bird to welcome into her life.

Misty, feel free to PM me if you need any advice from me about what to look for as a next parrot, or if you need any help with rehoming questions. I'm going AWOL for a while now but will peek back to check PMs

 

[getwozzy]

Misty15- thank you for coming back and giving us a little more info on your situation with your lovie I think that you've tried your best to make it work with Misty, and I commend you for that. It's not easy making the decision to rehome a fid, but sometimes it's the best decision. With that said, I don't think getting another lovie would be best... You said you've been looking into GCCs- I think you should also look at some other small/medium parrots...maybe look into a Quaker?

Please feel free to PM me if you need any help *hugs!*

 

[getwozzy]

As for everyone else, the only reason I haven't closed this thread is because I wanted to give the OP a chance to come back and explain her situation further....and to get helpful advice from us -because that's what we're here for!

If the arguing continues in this thread I WILL close it down. So play nice!!

 

[Blueridge]

Sun and Jenday Conures are very attractive and quite snuggly like the Green Cheeks, although they are very loud. If you like the size of the GCCs, you might want to look into Quaker Parrots, as they are very cuddly as well but not as loud. I mean they are loud, but not as loud as a sun conure. They have beautiful blue and yellow color mutations too. Parrotlets are nice as well. I think your current lovebird would be happier in an aviary, and I reccomend getting a hand-raised bird in the future so you don't have to go through this again.

Good luck

oh and sorry about insulting you with the perfect polly thing. You have to admit they are cool though.

 

[Freespin]

I admit I had a very similar situation with my first dog. I really wanted one but at the time I was only in a position to buy a small one. Found one cheap last of the litter and I broughy him he was so darn cute! But we never got on very well it was a disaster. Ended up giving him away and his new family live him to bits but though I wanted another dog I was so worried I was the problem and that if I got another it would just turn out the same. Anyway my situation changed a bit and I was in a better position to own another dog and a litter came up so I went for a look. One of the 11 pups chose me and a year and a bit on he is the most amazing once in a lifetime kind of dog. I can't imagine life without him.
So my advice is don't rush into anything, take your time choosing the right bird. Go and visit a few different birds and don't feel you have to get the first one you meet, make sure it feels right =)